A few days later, I stood behind the circle of kids as the support group was going on. Julian had decided to take a few days off after everything had happened with his father. I know he was still depressed and anxious about it and it was slowly starting to get worse, but I didn't know what to do. I had been giving him as much support as I possibly could since I didn't see anything else that I could do.

We had to go down to the police station yesterday to answer a few more questions and that made everything worse. I had listened to Julian telling the detective the things his father had said to him and it killed me to hear all of it. Mr. Caldwell had said stuff like "you're not my son" and "you deserve to burn in hell" and "Miles isn't even worth all this shit". Of course, it hurt me to hear him speak of me that way, but I made sure to not show it too much. Apparently, he had also said that if he found out that Nora was going to the center anymore, he would come back and finish the job if needed.

I think that scared both of us because there would be a day that he would get out of prison and he would find us just like he did a few days ago. But I tried not to focus on that right now because I had a fiance that I needed to help. I would probably talk to Andrea once support group was over, but that would mean having to tell her everything. We hadn't told anyone about what happened, except for Jonah since he had shown up to the house two days ago to see what was going on.

I felt so utterly stressed with everything that I've just been throwing myself into work. This fundraiser and making sure that all the kids in all of the homes are okay has been my life for the past few days while Julian has basically just been watching TV and sleeping. He hasn't really felt motivated to do anything, but I couldn't blame him. The moment he finally moved on from all the shit his parents put him through, they have to show back up and ruin it all.

I'm brought out of my thoughts by my phone vibrating in my pocket. I pull it out and when I see that it's Jonah, I freeze. Today was the first day that Julian and I had decided that he go back to work since everything happened and I'm assuming it wasn't okay. I looked to Bradlee, who was already looking at me, and motioned that I was going to step out for a second. When he nodded at me, I rushed out of the room without interrupting anything and put my phone up to my ear. "Hello?"

"Miles, you need to get home," Jonah urges, sounding out of breath.

My heart stops at that moment because I should've known that he wasn't okay. Of course, he's not fucking okay. I've been a terrible partner the past few days because I've been more focused on distracting him on everything that had happened than actually talking about it and moving on. I could've been better. I should've been better. "What's going on?"

"Julian just randomly decided that he wanted to go home, so I took him home. He started drinking, Miles. I'm scared that he's going to do something stupid and I don't think I can handle him. I need you to come home, please," he begs me, sounding stressed.

I rub my palm over my eyes, taking a moment to think before nodding my head. "I'll be there soon. Just don't let him do anything stupid."

I hang up then before slowly walking into the room. I go back up to Bradlee and whisper to him that I had to go home. I knew he would make sure everyone was okay like he'd been doing for the past few days along with the other volunteers. I quickly whisper to Andrea that I had to go, making sure to not look too stressed around any of the kids. I give them all a genuine smile and wave before leaving. I grab my stuff and rush out to my car, making sure to not speed as I start to drive home.

I don't even remember driving because the next thing I remember is pulling into the driveway. Jonah's car was parked on the side of the road, telling me that he was still here. I don't even grab my stuff, just rush inside the house. When I get in, I hear Julian yelling and hurry into the living room. He stood in the middle of the living room with a bottle of whiskey in his hands that I had barely ever seen him drink, but there was lots of liquid gone from it.

I knew he wasn't completely drunk because he had a pretty high tolerance, so that made me feel better. Jonah sat on one of the bar stools, just watching Julian as he continues to yell. "They never cared about me! All they cared about was if I was successful so they could have a good fucking reputation. They didn't care that I was so depressed about my friends leaving me to run Stigma by myself. They didn't give a fuck and-"

"Julian, stop," I snap at him, rushing over to grab the bottle from his hands before setting it on one of the shelves in the living room. I look back at Julian to see that he finally noticed that I was here. He looked a bit angry at me, but I ignore him as I turn to Jonah. "I got it from here, thank you for bringing him home."

Jonah nods his head before grabbing his bag and leaving the house. Once the front door closes, I look back over to Julian to see that he had collapsed onto the couch. He had his eyes still on me, so I sit next to him. He lets out a sigh when I just stare at him, waiting for him to speak. "I don't know what's going on. I couldn't be at that office. It's like they're always in my head now, telling me that I'm not good enough. That I'm not worth their love."

"Julian, no," I whisper, scooting closer to him to grab his hands in mine. "you are good enough. You are better than good enough. You're amazing and everything they should want in a child. They just are too blinded by homophobia that they can't see that. You deserve love, but no, you don't deserve their love. Because they're horrible, horrible people that just want to tear you down. You don't deserve their love because you deserve so much better than that."

Tears line his eyes when he looks back up at me and I tighten my grip on his hands. "What am I supposed to do now?"

I smile, reaching over and kissing his forehead before looking down at him. "We take things minute-by-minute, right? We just focus on right now and don't think about anything else."

He set his head on my shoulder, letting out a shaky sigh as he intertwines our hands together. He plays with my fingers for a minute before looking up at me with a small smile to convince me that he was okay. I wasn't convinced, but I ignore that and just lean down to place a soft kiss to his lips. I don't know why but I deepen the kiss, settling my hand on his cheek as he submits to me to let me do what I wanted.

I slide my hand down his cheek to his chest before settling it over his groin. He wasn't hard, but I ignore that as I pull away from his lips to slide to the ground. I settle between his legs before looking up at him with a smirk. "You want me to make you feel better?"

"Go ahead," he whispers, staring down at me with tired eyes.

I unbutton his pants before pulling them down slightly until I could see his cock that was still soft. I immediately wrap my mouth around the tip before swirling my tongue around it. I play with his sack as my mouth moves as much as I could without him sliding out of it, but I notice that he wasn't growing at all. It might've been the alcohol, which means I might have to work even harder, but I had a suspicion that that wasn't going to help. I look up at him to see that he was watching me with emotionless eyes.

When he sees me, he lets out a small sigh before sitting up. He pulls his pants up again before tucking his dick back inside of his briefs and standing from his seat on the couch. He walks over to grab the whiskey bottle before turning towards me with those same bored eyes. "Not in the mood."

He walks out of the room then without saying anything else. He leaves me kneeling on the ground, feeling like an absolute idiot and embarrassed as hell. I didn't know what to do. I gave him a chance to talk and he didn't take it. I comforted him and even tried to pleasure him, but nothing was working. The past few days, I've just been there for him, making sure he knew that I was here. I helped distract him, but nothing was working.

I felt myself starting to get emotional at the whole situation, so I pull out my phone to call the one person that always knew how to help me. I held the phone to my ear as it started to ring, hastily wiping at my eyes while I waited. After a few rings, she answers in a soft voice. "Hello?"

"Mom, I need help," I whisper, probably sounding disappointed, which I was. I was disappointed in myself. I should know how to help my fiance through this because that's what we're supposed to do. We're supposed to know these things and help them through everything that life throws at them.

"What's going on, Miles?" Mom asks, suddenly sounding worried. Then I just let everything spill out of my mouth as quick as it could. I stumble over some words all while tears were traveling down my face at a rapid rate. I could hear a TV playing loudly and I was assuming that he was upstairs in our room to get away for a bit. Once I was done talking about everything that happened with Mr. Caldwell, I let out a shaky breath.

"...and now, I don't know what to do. He doesn't want to do anything. He came home from work and just started drinking. I want to help, but I don't know how and I feel like a loser. I'm marrying him and I don't even know how to help him through this stuff," I whisper to her.

"Oh, baby," Mom says with a sigh. "this is a stressful situation and he's probably just trying to find a way to let out all that frustration that's probably building inside. All you can really do is be there for him and make sure he's okay. Distractions are always good and I know you've already done that. But have you talked to his friends? Have you talked to Nina and Andrea?"

I shake my head even though she can't see me. "No. I don't know if he wants them to know."

"Well, they'll know once the trial starts. Julian will most likely want to go," she tells me, which was true. He'll definitely want to see all of this through. "maybe you should call them. They've been his friends for a while. They'll know what to do."

"You don't think he'll get mad?" I ask.

"If he gets mad, he'll get over it eventually. You're only doing these things to help him, so he should appreciate it. Just call them and ask them to come over and they'll know exactly what to do. Take this time as a learning experience, okay? Watch what they do and remember that for whenever times get stressful," Mom says.

I let out a relieved sigh, glad that my mom was so amazing and helpful at all times. "Thank you, Mom. You're the best. I love you."

"I love you too. Call me in the morning to tell me how everything went," she tells me before we say our goodbyes. Once we hang up, I immediately call Nina since I needed them to come fast before he drank too much and passed out in bed. The phone rings for a bit until Nina's perky voice rings through.

"Hi, Miles!" She says in an excited voice, making me chuckle a bit before wiping at my eyes again. I don't know why I was crying so much, but I think I was just letting out all my emotions from the past few days. I was just too focused on Julian to face my own emotions and I finally was.

"I need your help," I tell her.

I can tell I worried her because she hesitates before speaking again. "What's wrong?"

I repeat the whole story to her just like I did with my mom. I add a few more details when telling her since she knew more than Mom did and I wasn't so embarrassed to tell her some stuff. It takes me a while to finish telling her everything and at this point, she hasn't said anything, which worried me. When I finish talking, I just shut up to let her think for a minute. I just told her a lot that she probably wasn't expecting so she needed to take a second.

I jump a bit when she speaks with tons of confidence. "Okay, Andrea and I will be over there in within an hour. What you need to do is take the alcohol away from him somehow. Keep him distracted for me."

I go to say something, but she hangs up instead. I pull the phone away to look at it before letting out a sigh. I set the device on the coffee table before getting to my feet and making my way to the stairs. I definitely take my time getting to the bedroom because I was dreading what was about to happen for some reason. When I push open the bedroom door, the sound of the TV gets even louder and it makes my eyes squint a bit.

Julian sat against the headboard with the liquor bottle sitting between his legs as he stares at the huge doors in front of him. He wasn't even paying attention to the TV, so I rush over to grab the tablet and mute the show that was playing. That gets his attention because his head snaps up to look at me with confusion before he puts on a blank face when he sees me standing there. I know I shouldn't hesitate, but I do before I rush towards him and grab the bottle. He lets out a groan when I place it on the floor in the hallway so he wasn't influenced by looking at it.

I close the bedroom door before turning to look at him. He had set his head back to look up at the ceiling instead of at me. I walk over to him, lowering myself to sit on the edge of the bed next to him and he doesn't even pay me any attention. I reach out, setting my hand on his shoulder to get him to look at me. When he does, I put on a smile and that's when his face softens when he sees the tears.

"Miles," he whispers, sitting up a bit before letting out a sigh. He hesitates for a second before pulling me down so we were laying together. He gets into a position to place his head on my chest, wrapping his arm around my stomach to just hold me against him. I slide one hand into his hair while the other settles next to me. We don't say anything. We just bask in the silence of the room along with our breathing. We just take in each other's touch and let that pull us into sleep.

I don't know how long we were asleep for, but the next thing I know is there's a double beep heard throughout the whole house, meaning someone just walked into the front door. Julian doesn't even falter, he shoots out of bed to grab his phone, but I snatch it from his hands while rubbing my eyes. "It's Nina and Andrea."

When I look up, he's giving me a confused look while also looking extremely tired from the short nap we just woke up from. He doesn't say anything to me, just walks out of the bedroom to go downstairs. I let out a sigh before following behind him, hoping this didn't go too bad. Once I walk into the living room and kitchen, I see two big brown bags sitting on top of the island that had a wonderful smell coming from them. Nina had pulled Julian into a hug, holding him tight while Andrea stood next to them.

"Are you okay?" Nina asks when they pull away. I know he would probably be mad at me for telling them everything that had happened and asked them to come over, but it was for his own good. I obviously wasn't going to figure all this out and I needed help. He should understand that.

"I'm okay," Julian says, but he was lying. There was no way he was alright. His father just beat the crap out of him and threatened the two of us, there's no way he just randomly recovered from that without talking about it.

I snicker, crossing my arms over my chest as the three of them look over at me. "You're not okay, Julian. Ignoring the problem isn't going to just magically fix everything and you know that."

"Miles," he says in exasperation, but I could see the sadness that was starting to seep into his body again. I take a step towards him when I see that tears were gathering in his eyes and he hides his face in Nina's shoulder. Andrea glances at me, looking concerned for both of us. She grabs Julian's shoulders to usher him to sit down on the couch along with Nina.

I don't make a move towards them as they start to whisper things to him. I jump up on the counter, letting my feet dangle as I let my mind start to run wild. Maybe Julian would get sick and tired of everything, including me, and want to start fresh. What if he called off the wedding? Asked me to move out? Fired me from the non-profit? What would I do if he just decides that I wasn't good enough for him?

"Miles," Andrea says with worry and I look up at her to see that she had noticed that bad thoughts were starting to creep in. I shake my head at her, telling her to not focus on me. She needed to worry about Julian because he's the one having a breakdown and needed her more than I did.

She goes to say something, but she's interrupted by the front door opening accompanied by the beeps. I check my watch to see that it was time for Lola to bring Bailey back from his walk and right on cue, he runs into the room. I jump down from the counter, not paying attention to any of the people in the living room as I go towards the front door. I see Lola hanging up Bailey's leash on the hooks we have in the entryway and when she sees me coming in, she gives me a huge smile.

"Hi, Miles! I saw your car in the driveway, so I was just going to drop him off and get going," she tells me before turning towards me fully.

"Yeah, of course. I'm sorry, I probably should've told you that we were home instead of just surprising you like this," I tell her with a chuckle.

"Oh, don't worry about that. I mean, it is your home. But, if you don't mind me asking, why are you home this early? I thought you two were going back to work today, I mean, that's what you said yesterday. Is everything alright?" She asks and I can tell that she's genuinely worried. Over the past three years, Lola has gotten close to me. I mean, she sees Bailey more than I do sometimes. She was there with me at the apartment and she transitioned into this house with me and I know it was hard for her because our house was so much farther than her other clients. I made sure to pay her as much as I know she deserves because she does a lot for me. Not only does she walk and feed Bailey, but she's taken him to the vet a few times as well.

I mean, she's not just my dog walker. She genuinely does so much for me and she even helped me move to Julian's house. I'm truly grateful for her. "Um, if I'm being honest, there's some stuff going on, but it should be alright soon."

Her face turned into a concerned one as she looked at me. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

I don't know why, but that statement made me very emotional. I've been so focused on Julian that I hadn't taken my own emotions into account. Yeah, I cried a lot earlier, but that was basically because I couldn't figure out what to do with him, but now, what the hell am I supposed to do with me? "Uh, I don't know."

"Oh, Miles," she whispers before putting her hand on my shoulder and ushering me out of the house. We settle onto the step with her arm around my shoulder as a few tears leak down my face. "what's going on?"

I let out a small chuckle, wiping the tears away with my thumb. "Julian and I just went through some stuff that brought back some pretty bad memories for him, like traumatic memories. And, um, I don't know how to fix it. I don't know what I can do to help, you know? I feel so useless that I had to call his friends over to help him through this. I just... I don't know."

Lola turns toward me, reaching out and taking one of my hands to give me comfort. "You can't always help people, Miles. Sometimes people just need others because you've been there for him for... what? Two years? You've been there and you've always been able to help, but now, it's just too much for him probably. I know you want to be there and help him through this, but it is absolutely alright to get others to be there for you. It's okay to rely on others when you can't do something. It's totally okay."

I nod my head, knowing that she's right. "I know."

She smiles at me, making me feel supported. We've never been this close before and I've never really told her too much about Julian and I's life just because I don't think that what this friendship is between us. But it felt good that she was here with me, it really did. "You and Julian are some of the best people I've ever met and I'm not just saying that to make you feel good or because I work for you. You two have so much love for each other and I get to experience it every time I see the two of you. Just don't worry too much about it, alright? Things will work out in the end."

I pull her into a hug, feeling extremely grateful for her. She giggles a bit as she wraps her arms around my waist, rubbing my back in a soothing gesture. I let out a sigh before pulling away from the hug, giving her the best smile I could muster up. "Thank you, Lola. Seriously, thank you."

We stand up before giving each other another hug. "I should probably get home. I'll see you when I see you. I fed Bailey before we left for our walk so he should be good for right now."

"Thank you so much," I tell her before she waves and goes off towards her car that she parked on the street outside of our house. Once she gets in and drives away, I take a deep breath before going back inside the house. I pet Bailey a bit since he was so excited to see me and I make sure he was okay and loved before walking towards the living room where Nina, Andrea, and Julian still were on the couch.

When I walk in, I see that Julian's head was in his hands while the two girls rubbed his back. I freeze in the doorway to listen in without them knowing that I was here. He was sobbing at this point, sounding so defeated. "I just... I don't want h-him to be able to hurt him anymore. Miles deserves so much better than this. He shouldn't have to go through the same trauma that I went through for years upon years."

Andrea lets out a sigh, running her hand through her hair. They still hadn't noticed that I was here, which was good because I don't think they would be talking like this if they did know. "Julian, Miles can handle this. He's one of the strongest people I've met. No matter what's going on, he has so much love for everyone around him. I know this seems like an impossible situation, but pushing him away isn't something you can do."

"I don't want him to get hurt," Julian cries, which makes my eyes get watery again.

Nina speaks up this time, looking sad at what was going on. "Your father is going to prison, you know that. He won't be out for a while and once he is, you both will have a restraining order against him, right? So you need to stop worrying about him being hurt because he will be okay. He is okay."

I looked up from my feet since my head had dropped while I listened to her and when I did, Andrea was staring at me with sympathetic eyes. She motioned for me to come over to them and I decide that I probably shouldn't be eavesdropping anymore. I slowly walk towards them before dropping to my knees in front of Julian. When he sees me there, he gets a bit of panic in his eyes before he hides it from me. I give him a soft smile as I place my hands on his knees. "Pushing me away won't do anything because we both know that I'll just annoy the hell out of you until you realize that."

He chuckles a bit, using his sleeve to wipe away some snot that was dripping from his nose. "Trust me, I know."

I chuckle before turning serious, looking into his eyes with the most loving expression I could give him. "No matter what happens, no matter who hurts me or who touches me, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I don't give a fuck what other people do to me or why they do it to me. The only thing that I care about is you. If you're there with me."

He shakes his head, that panic starting to rise. "But you don't deserve this, you don't-"

"No," I interrupt him. I could tell that I shocked Andrea and Nina with my cold tone, but I ignore them as Julian gives me a stressed look. "I don't care what you think I deserve or not. I will go to hell and back a thousand fucking times if it means helping you through these things or taking any pain away from you, okay? I'm here and I will be here to handle these traumatic things with you. Don't worry about me. Just focus on getting better right now."

He nods his head before grabbing my hands in his and holding them against his forehead as he starts to cry again. I've never seen him break like this before, but I wasn't worried. This needed to happen for a while because now, he can get better. He can find that strength within me and himself and just focus on moving past this. Times will be tough for a bit, but he has people by his side that can shoulder some of that trauma for him.

"Oh, Julian," Nina whispers, wrapping her arm around his shoulder and holding him close. Andrea reaches over to place her hand on top of my head with a small smile.

You did good, she mouths to me. That made my heart swoon with pride because she knows him better than I did when it came to his mental state so the fact that I was able to help him made me happy. This man was going to be my husband and I needed to learn these things. I'm just so glad that I had these two amazing girls here with me to help.

"I love you, everything will be alright," I whisper to Julian before pulling my hands away from his forehead to see his face. There were wet streams running down his cheeks and he looked like a mess, but I didn't care. I run my hand through his hair and he nods his head, giving me a genuine smile for the first time in the past few days.

"We got you," Andrea whispers to him.

"Yeah, we got you. We'll help you through this. We'll take things..." Nina starts before looking at me with confusion. "what is it that you say?"

I chuckle, kissing Julian's hand quickly. "Minute-by-minute. We'll take things minute-by-minute."

Julian chuckles, wiping his eyes before nodding his head. The rest of the night went very smoothly. After Julian calmed down, we ate some of the food that Nina had brought and just watched movies while making sure to keep everything light and positive. By the end of the night, Julian and I laid in bed and just held each other for hours upon hours while talking things through. We would be okay. I'll make sure that we'll be okay.