Chapter Four

Cheating

I continue enjoying my life even if my mother didn't stop finding me a date. Wala namang magawa si Dad dahil palagi lang itong nakasuporta sa ina ko pero hindi rin naman nawala ang mga paalala niya.

Everyone became busy with Cahill and Anishka's wedding. They plan to get married in Russia at iyon naman ang nasunod.

I am happy for my brother, don't get me wrong pero may parte sa aking nasasayangan pa rin sa pag-aasawa niya ng maaga. Maybe because his marriage represents the end of our whoring life together. Kahit na kasi marami akong kaibigan ay kaming dalawa ang malapit at pinakamagkasundo sa lahat ng mga kagaguhan lalo na pagdating sa mga babae pero ngayong magpapatali na siya sa iisa ay hindi ko na siya puwedeng isama. I'm flying solo now.

Everyone was emotional while they were exchanging their vows. My mother was crying because of too much happiness samantalang ako ay nakatitig lang sa dalawa. Hindi ko napigilan ang ilang hibla ng inggit sa puso ko nang halikan na ni Cahill ang kanyang asawa.

Nakisali ako sa palakpakan nang matapos ang kasal at hinanda na ang sarili sa reception dahil alam ko nang ibebenta na naman ako ni Mom doon.

Hindi nga ako nagkamali. Malayo pa lang ay nakasukbit na ang kamay ni Mommy sa isang babaeng bagong mukha sa aking paningin. She looks regal and very beautiful.

"This is Yasemin, hijo," malaki ang ngising sambit ng ina ko matapos ko silang malapitan. "Yasemin, this is my son Mikolos."

Hindi natigil sa pagningning ang mga mata ng babae nang magkatitigan na kami. I offered my hand to properly greet her. Sa gilid ng aking mga mata ay parang gusto nang magtumalon ni Mommy sa tuwa nang halikan ko ang likod ng palad ng babae.

"It's my pleasure to meet you, Yasemin."

She giggled and answered me, "Pleasure is mine, Mr. Rozovsky."

"Just call me Mikolos or whatever you want to call me." I smirked, pinamulahan naman siya ng mukha.

"Oh, you're so cute together! I'll leave you two!" napakamot ako sa ulo nang balingan ako ni mommy sabay titig sa akin ng makahulugan bago pa kaming tuluyang iwan.

"I'm sorry about that."

"No, your mother is lovely."

"Yes she is, but don't love her too much, alright? I am not yet ready for marriage."

Napangiti siya sa sinabi ko. "I know."

"What do you mean by that?"

She slowly sips her champagne, mas lalo akong naintriga sa kung anong alam niya tungkol sa akin.

"Words about how womanizer you are get passed around a lot."

"And you believe it?"

"Is there a reason why not?"

Ako naman ang napainom. Ang plano ko sa pagpunta sa kasal na ito ay gaya rin ng plano ni Mom para sa aking humanap ng babae pero sa magkaibang dahilan. My mother likes to play cupid for me and I play cupid for myself just to get into someone's pants. And now, being with Yasemin and seeing how she was starting to get invested in me made me settle.

Our conversation went on and she was fun to talk to. Mahirap kunin ang loob sa una but eventually she started flirting with me, too.

"It must have been hard for you."

"Nah. Relationships bore me anyway. Two months of being single made me value myself more."

"Two months, huh."

"How about you, Mikolos? Have you ever been in a relationship?"

"What kind?"

She scoffs at that. "The serious one and not the one where you uses your..." bumaba ang mga mata niya sa aking pantalon. "That."

Imbes na ayusin ang sarili ay mas ibinuka ko lang ang mga hita sa harapan niya. Namula siya sa aking ginawa. She was so reserved at first kaya akala ko walang tiyansa na maikama ko siya ngayon gabi pero sa nakikita ko ay ilang sandali na lang ay siya na mismo ang magyayaya sa aking umalis sa lugar na ito at unahan sila Cahill sa kanilang honeymoon.

"No, I don't do that," sinulyapan ko ang bagay sa gitna ng aking mga hita. "This is the only way to entertain and have a conversation with me, nothing else."

"Fuck boy."

"The best fuck you'll ever had." I smirked.

"Stop flattering yourself."

"Words about me being amazing in bed didn't get to you yet?"

Nakagat niya ang pang-ibabang labi nang ilapit ko ang paa sa kanya. As if my touch would finally break all her walls.

"Some."

"You don't believe it?" I said, teasing her more. "Want me to prove it to you?"

"Now?"

Ibinaba ko ang hawak na champagne flute sa lamesa at wala nang sabing tumayo at inilatag ang kamay sa kanya. Hindi naman ako nabigo.

Moments later, we were fucking inside my car. Parang may delubyo sa loob ng aking sasakyan dahil sa tindi ng paggalaw nito sa gilid ng kalsada. Kung may makakakita ay baka isiping may mga nag-aaway na leon sa loob.

Yasemin was good but not as great as some women I've fucked before. Maybe because she was also a good daughter. Hindi masyadong pakawala and she only had sex with me for revenge. Nalaman kong niloko siya ng boyfriend niya sa araw mismo ng kanilang anniversary kaya sila naghiwalay.

"I've been patient and loving for six freaking years. I'm stupid."

Kinuha ko sa kamay niya ang sinindihang marijuana at walang sabing hinithit 'yon. We were still both naked from the waist down. Pagkatapos na pagkatapos kong labasan ay ibinaba ko na ang convertible roof para makahinga kaming dalawa. Even with my car open, the air still smells like sex and our scent combined.

"Love could make you blind."

"And stupid," she interjects. "It was not the first time we broke up because of a third party. He cheated on me multiple times before I decided to choose myself this time."

"Good for you." tanging naisagot ko.

I haven't been into a relationship so giving her some advise was foolish. She took the marijuana again on my hand and puffed it. Nang maubo siya ay agad kong hinaplos ang kanyang likuran.

"Easy."

"This shit is good."

"Right?"

Parehas kaming natawa. Sa mga sumunod na minuto ay walang nagsalita sa amin hanggang sa maubos na lang ang tsongke.

"What is your reason of staying single, Mikolos? Are you afraid of getting hurt and cheated on?"

Napabaling ako sa kanya. Maraming babae na akong nakasama pero ito pa lang ang una na nagkaro'n ako ng malalim na pag-uusap. Some girls were just like the condoms I used to fuck them. Tinatapon lang kaagad kapag tapos na ako.

"I don't think I'm afraid. It's just that I know I am not yet ready for that. I think I am still immature and couldn't handle some serious shit, you know."

Bumaling siya sa akin, ang mga mata ay interesadong-interesado sa mga pananaw ko.

"Imagine yourself being with someone you love deeply and then later get cheated on. Would you forgive them?"

Napalunok ako sa narinig.

"I just want to know your opinion about it, Mikolos. You can refuse to answer if you don't want."

"No," walang pag-aalinlangan kong sagot. "That's also part of the reason why I don't want to be in a relationship because I know I can't reject temptation. I know I am still capable of cheating, but if the right time comes and I found the right person for me, I'll totally forget my old ways. I will be faithful all the way so I expect her to do the same thing."

"What if she fucked up and cheated on you?"

Dismayado akong umiling. "Then she made a choice and that's not to be with me."

"But what if you love her so much? Aren't you going to give her a second chance?"

"Not in that way, Yasmine. I don't believe in second chance when it comes to cheating because you know it's a sin before you even do it. You're aware that you'll break the person you're with so if you still chose that, then that's it."

She was speechless. Nakatitig lang sa akin. Hindi inasahan na malalim ang opinyon ko tungkol doon.

"So it's the end, huh?"

I nodded. "I am not stupid to give someone a second chance when they already chose temporary and fleeting feeling over me. I deserved better than that. Everyone deserves better than that."

Natigil ako nang makita ang pagkislap ng mga luhang nalaglag sa kanyang mga mata. I heave a sigh before pulling her closer to me. Clearly, she agreed to fuck me just to forget her ex. Hanggang ngayon ay ramdam na ramdam ko pa rin ang sakit na nararamdaman niya sa kinahinatnan ng relasyong iyon.

I let her cry on my chest.

"No one deserves to be cheated on and the right person will never cheat and hurt you like that if they really love and values you. Your ex clearly took you for granted and you don't deserve him, Yasemin."

My speech made her kiss me. Hindi ko na inasahan may round two pa, but she rewarded me with it after I comforted her.

I said everything not because I was high but it was really my take when it comes to that matter. Walang sino man ang may karapatang manakit sa paraang iyon dahil iyon ang pinaka-mortal sin sa akin.

I knew a lot of people who cheated and got cheated on. Oo nga't may mga nasalo akong naging girlfriend ni Cahill pero hindi ko naman iyon ikinokonsiderang pagloloko dahil bago ko pa gawin ay hiwalay na sila. My brother knew about all that and we are cool. Para sa akin ay isinalba ko lang siya sa mga babaeng hindi ko nakikitang para talaga sa kanya and look where it lead him.

Hindi na kami nagkita ni Yasemin pagkatapos ng gabing iyon. I just heard one day that she got back with her ex and got engaged. It was the most fucked up news I've heard.

Bulag nga talaga ang pag-ibig. Iba-iba rin lang siguro ang pagkakagawa sa bawat tao. May mga taong kayang magpatawad kahit na paulit-ulit na silang ginago at mayroon namang mga gaya kong hindi.

I really don't know how love really works pero kung gaya lang rin naman ni Yasemin ang magiging sitwasyon ko ay huwag na lang.

I've dealt with a lot of dangerous people in my life, but no one beats my hatred towards a cheater... even until the reality slaps me with the truth that I have a cheating and adulterous father.

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