My head hits against a firm surface as I groan, slowly opening my eyes. Smile lines mar Asiel's face as he's facing the tv. Shit. I must've fallen asleep after catching the fireworks. The alcohol hit me like a fucking truck. After baking the cake, my memories get a bit hazy, but I bet I enjoyed every second because I was with Asiel.

When I let my mind wander, I wondered how I got here.

How did I let myself get so attached to a man? What's so different about Asiel that makes me want to stay on this rollercoaster with him? I know Tania told me to go with the flow, but I'm mind blown by my own actions. It's always been me, myself, and I. Surviving in this world is unattainable when you have a liability.

My secrets.

My second name, persona, alter ego.

Asiel Morterero.

All connects like a toy train. If one thing unravels, then everything slips away. All my efforts go to waste. Just like a typical book character, I did the one single thing a monster shouldn't do-- care. I wanted to act like there was nothing but a functioning organ. A black void. A venomous black hole. But I couldn't be any more wrong because every day I spend with Asiel, I feel it.

It skips, thuds, halts.

Not even at age ten, when Diablo tried to kill. I didn't bat a fucking eyelash. I stared at him, dead in the eye, and said, "do it." No fear, no panic, no worry. Nothing. He placed the barrel right between my eyes, and I laughed.

But when Luka said he would expose the truth to Asiel, I felt every single one of those dreadful emotions.

It's fucking extraordinary, isn't it?

My biggest fear might lead me to my demise.

"Oh, you're awake?" Asiel says, staring down at me with his beautiful emerald puppy dog eyes.

I yawn, covering my mouth with my palm. "Yeah, how long did I sleep for?"

Warmth spread through his palm as he soothes my shoulder, causing knots in my stomach in the best way possible. "For about the three hours, aka the entire fucking movie."

I sport a smug smile. "I told you, I can't do cheesy rom-com movies. They bore me to death."

Asiel's mouth gapes open as he pauses the end credits. "This isn't even a rom-com! There's an entire ship sinking for the second half of the movie. Don't forget the heartbreaking ending."

I laugh. "I don't get it. Why couldn't Rose just give Jack some space? The plank was big enough for the both of them."

He narrows his eyes. "Don't start dragging logic into this."

"Why? Because it derails the purpose of a heartbreaking romance, making the entire movie rather pointless?" I cheekily reply, arching my brow with amusement.

Asiel grabs my head and places a kiss on my forehead. "Gosh, give romantic movies a chance. They aren't so bad. We should try Tangled next. That always gets me."

I roll my eyes. "No! I cannot suffer through another boring romance. It's my turn to pick!"

He pouts, his lip ring glimmering in the fluorescent light. "Fine, but next time we're watching it. When Flynn dies, it's like a part of me dies. I'm going to cry just thinking about it." He moves the blanket off his body. "I'll go refill our basket of popcorn."

I nod. "Okay."

His eyes don't leave mine until he is in the hallway. Once he's gone, I notice the fucking cheesy smile I was wearing the entire time and shake my head. Jesus, I'm losing it. Absolute lunatic. Pushing the covers off my body, I rush to the bathroom and gargle mouthwash in my mouth. Actually, now thinking about it, I have a better way for Asiel and me to spend the rest of the night.

A girl never leaves her house unprepared.

Exiting the bathroom, I dig through my sleeping bag and pull out a heart glass wand dildo. It's my favorite toy. After Asiel's dick, of course. Nothing beats the real thing, but I had amazing orgasms with this thing. Tonight, calls for another adventure into the crazy sex world by torturing my sweetheart of a boyfriend.

It's only fair since he did it to me first.

Quickly, I throw my hair into pigtails and squeeze my feet into my butterfly lace-up heels. There's something about wearing stilettos that makes sex a hundred times sexier. I brought a pair of plain beige lace undergarments, but I'm sure my boyfriend appreciates my body in anything. He probably prefers when I wear nothing.

I push his desk chair to the middle of the room, right in front of his bed, for him to get the perfect view of me. Fuck. My thong is getting wetter the more I think about it. Jesus, why does it take so long to make popcorn? Tick-tock. I might literally die if I don't get any dick. Does that make me a whore? Probably.

Do I care?

Nope.

The door creaks open with a basket full of popcorn until it slips from his fingertips as his mouth falls open. My wide-eye beau is mesmerized, his irises hungrily devouring my body as if he hadn't fucked me in ages. It's so fucking hot. His eyes linger on the glass dildo in my hands, gulping as his mind adventures off.

"Muñeco." I pout. "Look at the big mess you made on the floor."

"H-Huh?" A frown mars between his eyebrows as confusion sinks in until he glances down. "S-sorry. I got distracted by this goddess in front of me."

I roll my eyes at his cheesy comment. "Mmm. Nice try, baby boy." My heels click on his wooden floor as I kick the door shut and grab his hand, leading him to the chair. "Remember when I said I'll make you regret teasing me?"

He swallows audibly. "Y-Yes."

Like an obedient pup, he lets me guide him to the chair and slips right in. His legs slide open to a manspread while he waits for the next instructions. Falling to my knees, I grab the two pieces of rope and tie his hand to the armrest. Not too tight to hurt him, but restrain him enough to suffer. Asiel bites on his bottom lip, swaying his silver lip ring back and forth, his cock twitching in his pants already.

My finger holds his chin up. "Muñeco, I need you to do this little thing for me, and then maybe I'll reward you for being such a good boy. Okay?"

He nods eagerly. "W-what do you want me to do?"

"Sit back and watch."

Asiel swallows, licking his lips repeatedly as my body sinks into the mattress, spreading my legs wide open. His breath hitches as I drag my finger up and down my moist thong, lathering the dildo with my spit. It slips into my mouth like a popsicle smaller in size compared to Asiel's. Way fucking smaller. I don't even struggle to deepthroat it.

With the tip of my index finger, I push my thong aside and expose my pussy. My pretty pink lips curl into a beautiful butterfly as arousal leaks out. The pad of my finger rubs against my silts, and I bite harshly on my lip.

"Look how wet I am for you, Muñeco." I giggle, showing him the wetness coating my finger before I suck on it. "Do you see how badly I want you to fill me up? How eager I am to get stretched out by your thick cock."

I rub the wand up down my clit, choking back a moan. Using my empty hand, I lower my bra, exposing my pierced breasts as I knead them. Asiel's eyes can't stay still, drifting to every inch of my body as he squirms impatiently in the chair. The heel of my stilettos grazes Asiel's thigh as I slip the dildo through my slits, throwing my head back, moaning.

My chest constricts as the dildo hits the perfect spot. My pulse skids to the ceiling as Asiel's gaze burns hot, fiery lust. He wants to move, but he knows if he breaks my rule that he gets nothing. I squeeze my nipples between my fingertips as I moan helplessly, thrusting the dildo in and out. A groan comes from deep in Asiel's chest as he spreads his leg further, the dent clear in his joggers.

"Ahh," I moan. "It feels so fucking good. Should I come, baby boy? Do you want me to come?"

His deep, rasp voice fills my ears. "No. You're only allowed to come on my cock. You're mine, remember?"

I laugh. "I'm yours?" Slowly taking the dildo out from my lips, I glide my tongue up the wet base. "What are you going to do if I disobey you?"

A quiet noise crawls up his throat, a mixture of satisfaction and impatience. "I'm going to fuck you so hard that you won't ever think about using anything else but my cock."

"Sounds like a risk I'm willing to take," I smirk.

I whimper as the dildo slips through my lips like a knife, cutting through a moist cake, picking up the pace. Every angle of the wand hits my g-stop, causing endless moans to fly out my mouth. I'm gripping the bedsheets, thrusting the wand deeper, visualizing Asiel's cock instead. My whole body shudders as the pleasure builds and builds, tipping over the edge. Electric clusters form in my lower belly, the sweet sensation of pleasure and pain.

"Shit! I'm coming." My eyes squeeze tightly shut, quickening my pace, arching my back, and holding my breath to feel everything a thousand times stronger. My thigh clamps around my hand, my arousal dripping on the bed. Slowly, as the tremor eases through my body, I take the wand out, glistening with white cream.

"Do you want a taste?" I ask, cocking my head innocently as I wave the wand in front of his face.

Asiel's emerald irises darken with crazed lust. My heart pulses to the explosion of fireworks, unable to foresee his next move. His stare burns into mine, lightening me on fire. Heat rushes up my neck to my cheeks like a rising thermometer. There's nothing but whistling silence as he forces his hands out from the ropes.

His lips curl up in a snarl, his breathing harsh as he seizes the back of my head. "I'm done being a good boy for the night." He dips his thumb into my mouth, swirling it around. "It's your turn to bend over and take it like the good girl you are."

Giggling, I bite down on his thumb. "What happens if I don't want to be a good girl?"

"Let's find out."

He tosses his t-shirt to the other side of the room, exposing his chiseled chest in its all ink glory. Heat radiates off from him like a radiator. My fingers tug at his grey joggers, his dent painfully large, desperate to come out.

"Can I play with what's mine?" I ask, inching his sweats lower and lower.

Asiel envelopes his large hands over mine, forcing them off his joggers. He turns around, bending down to pick up the rope I used on him, and circles back, smirking. His hands grab my waist, pulling me up against him, close enough for his cock to push against my ass.

My breaths pick up as his palm covers my mouth, and he whispers into the shell of my ear, "You got a smart mouth, Princesa. Maybe, it's time to fuck that smart mouth of yours." My wrists are entwined behind my back, confined by the same piece of rope. "Now, get on the floor."

Oh. My pussy is fucking dripping wet from the way he's treating me. I love a man with complexity. A duality to change his demeanor like a light switch. It's a huge fucking turn-on. He removes his hand from around my mouth, and I slump down until my eyes are level with his clothed dick.

I lick my lips in preparation as I watch him pull out his dick, wrapping his hand around it, lazily pumping it up and down. His hard knuckles protrude when he squeezes the tip, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip. My hand doesn't compare. I can't even wrap my hand around half of it. Jesus fucking Christ.

I think he meant what he said.

He grabs my pigtail and pulls them back until I'm chin up. "Let's put that smart mouth to some good use." I part my lips for him, and he doesn't waste a second putting himself in my mouth.

He's so fucking big. Asiel deeply groans as he stretches my jaw, using my pigtails to drag my head down, making his dick hit the back of my throat. Slowly, I go back up, and my jaw loosens, ready to please him. If my hands weren't tied up, I'd be fingering myself, but beggars couldn't be choosers.

I gag, tears coating my eyes as pumps himself in and out of my lips. My mascara is smudged, spit dripping down my chin as I suck the shit out of his dick. Asiel groans deeply, and his head falls back as he bites down on those sweet pink lips. He doesn't let up, and I don't want him to. My cheeks hollow as I suck him harder, take him further until he hits the back of my throat.

"How bad do you want my come, Princesa?" he rasps through gritted teeth. "You suck it so good."

I moan on his cock to show him how badly I want to taste him. Instead of two hands, Asiel switches to one, holding both my pigtails and forcing his dick down my throat. My vision becomes blurry as tears sting out, but I love it. A low moan rips out his throat as his dick twitches in my mouth, filling me up with his delicious come. His cock pulsates one last time before he takes it out of my mouth.

His breathing is raggy. "Open your mouth and show me what I gave you." Laughing, I open my mouth, sticking my tongue out for him to see his sweet come. The pad of his thumbs wipes the tears streaming down my cheeks and says, "Good girl. Now, swallow it."

I do.

I don't think fucking twice.

A moan slips past my lips when Asiel bends down, making me lose my balance as he thrust his fingers inside of me. "Look how fucking wet you are. So desperate to be fucked, right? So eager to be stretched out. Beg, Princesa."

I shake my head, wanting to see how far I can push him. "Princesas, don't beg. You either fuck me, or I'll fuck myself."

My mind spirals as Asiel shoves me onto the bed, laying my back on the mattress and aggressively biting, sucking on my neck, boobs, thighs. The beautiful mixture of pain and pleasure rips countless moans from my throat, as he doesn't leave any part of my body untouched. He flips me over, dragging me towards the edge of the bed and placing a pillow below my arms.

The tips of my hair graze my back as I fling upward, catching a glimpse of Asiel and me in his full-length mirror. There's nothing like being tied up like a pretzel to make you hornier than a dog. It's so fucking erotic to watch Asiel pumping himself as he pushes my back down and my ass up. Asiel tears open the condom package with his teeth, rolling it down his length.

He puts his palm in the middle of my back and groans as he thrusts into me from behind. A gasp leaves my lips as he stretches my pussy, filling me to the hilt. His eyes are hooded, heavy with passion as he stares at the mirror, making eye contact with me. Fuck. My mind is drifting into a wonderland fill with ripples of pleasure.

My tongue snakes across my lips as a whimper slips out as he drags him out, only to slam himself back into me. Asiel wraps my pigtails around his fist and forces my head forward, exposing the purple lovebites on my neck.

"Even when you're leaking, you're still so goddamn tight. You like my cock, don't you, Princesa?" He rasps, thrusting in and out, frustratedly slow. A part of my punishment, I assume. "You take it so well. Creaming on it like a good girl would. That's why you're mine."

"No. No, I'm not." I giggle, muffled, as I bury my face in the sheets.

Using his vacant hand, he grabs a handful of my ass, shaking it around as his hips slap into my ass, filling the room with the lovely sounds of sex. Asiel always makes me feel so full, so close to crumbling apart in the best way possible. It hasn't even been two minutes, but Asiel has me teetering on the edge of an orgasm. The familiar sensation brews in my lower belly, ready to depart from its station.

"I'm going to come. Keep going like that," I moan, my face pressed against the mattress. "Please, baby. Just like that. You fuck me so fucking good."

Asiel slows his movements, but it's too late. The orgasms tremor through my body, losing all mobility and sight, crumbling into dust. My knees buckle underneath me, but Asiel stops me from collapsing on the bed. My breath hitches when he grabs my throat, pulling me upright until my body presses against his.

He squeezes harder on the sides of my neck and seethes, "Did I fucking tell you to come? Did I?" I shriek when he pinches my nipples, driving further on the spectrum of pain and pleasure. "No, right? You aren't allowed to do anything without my permission, and now I'm going to use you until I got my worth."

Asiel rolls his hips, hitting a spot in me so sensitive that my eyes roll back instantly. My body squirms against the friction, but his hold on my throat, and my waist keep me from moving. I curl my fingers into my palms, tugging at the rope that holds my hands captive behind my back.

His harsh pants fill the air as he picks up paces and uses my cunt the way it's supposed to be used. My eyes roll back. A pitiful whimper comes out of my mouth as his thrusts become shorter, harder, stretching me out so wide. My toes curl on the head of my heels, overwhelm by the whirling pleasure surging through my body like a tornado.

"Shit. Shit." I scream, my face scrunching as the entire sensation bundles into a cluster of euphoria.

"What, Princesa?" Asiel mutters in my ear, his hips slapping against my ass. "Is baby boy's cock going to make you come again? You better not, unless you beg."

"Please," I surrender, begging, pleading. "Please let me come. I'm begging you. I need it. Just like how much I need your cock."

His movements are fluid, mind-fucking, consuming as he squeezes my throat and covers my mouth. My pants fall into the comfort of his palms, feeling the familiar sensation threatening to break through. I seriously can't hold on much longer. He knows what he's fucking doing to me.

"Come for me, my sweet little slut. Use my cock the same way I use this sweet cunt of yours." My orgasm hits me hard. I'm shaking all over, letting out a moan that was more of a scream into his hand. "F-Fuck!"

Asiel jerks his hips into me one last time, and then I feel his dick pulsing, growing warm inside me. He thrusts one, two times and keeps his hips pressed against my ass as he moans, dropping his sweaty forehead on my shoulder. His warm breath tickles my dewy skin.

He softly bites on my shoulder blades and digs his fingers below my ribcage-- my weak spot. Tickling while simultaneously pulling his dick out. All the sweet fullness slips away, but I'm also fucking exhausted. Fucking isn't easy. Especially when you churn out three orgasms.

"W-was I too rough?" Asiel asks, his tone soft and sweet and innocent.

The way I found him.

I shake my head. "No. I loved every second of it. Next time, you should add in a little slapping."

His face sours. "I-I'm not sure. I don't want to hurt you."

"Muñeco," I whine. "It's the good kind of hurt."

Gently, Asiel unties the rope around my wrists and kneads them with love as he observes the indents leftover. His eyes soften, guilt plaguing them as he presses heartfelt kisses on my raw skin. He's too good, too sweet, too perfect for me. I don't deserve someone like him. I deserve someone like Diablo.

Two monsters.

But I'm selfish. I want to keep Asiel all to myself. Whatever the stakes may be, I'll do anything. I can't tarnish a pure soul, but thankfully, that's not me. There's no reason for me to teeter on the rope of salvation, when I'm way past saving. A fallen angel can find the light again, but its wings are still damaged.

Asiel traces down the slopes of my cheekbones. "Gosh, Mika you get more beautiful every second I look at you." His lips curl into a loving grin. "You're the best thing that ever happened to me. Remember that."

I swallow. "What happens if I'm not? Maybe we just found each other when we both needed to. Maybe we are a small part of our insignificant lives?"

"Impossible." Asiel drags my hand to his glistening, sweaty chest, laying my palm over his heart. "This beats for you. It's made for you. Nothing can ever change that. You're my air, my oxygen, my lifeline to this world. I'm nothing without. Just a speck of dust drifting through the world with no purpose. You gave me a purpose."

What happens if I tell him the truth?

Would he still want to see me then?

The smile never leaves Asiel's face as he gets up to grab a couple of tissues from the bathroom and knees down, cleaning the wetness on my thighs. My stupid fucking heart skips a beat again. Damit! I liked it better when we were fucking, and the emotions were disguised with lust.

"Now, go use the bathroom so we can finish watching your movie," Asiel says, tossing the tissues into the garbage can.

Orphan.

Am I an Ester or a Max?

Laughing like a manic, I launch a handful of popcorn at the television as Ester sinks into the frozen lake after getting her ass kicked by Kate. Credits rolls, and my eyes drift over to a sleeping Asiel. His lips are parted, lightly snoring as he clings to my arm like a teddy bear. This is the perfect time to flick the first domino in this domino effect.

With a strained breath, I slowly drag my arm out from Asiel's hold and grab the robe on his rack. The knots suffocate my waist, but it's better than flashing Pacho when he enhances the recording. Obviously, I came over with the mindset of spending the entire weekend with my boyfriend, but I also needed to put Luka to an end.

As soon as fucking possible.

That's why I'm going to snoop through Ander's bedroom. Asiel is too close, too pure. He views people with angelic goggles when in reality the world is cruel, dark, fucked-up. Two things don't add up. They need context, substance. Two fathers fighting over a piece of chicken over a holiday dinner sounds too rational for this family.

A cover-up story to tell the adolescent child in the family.

The second-- is Luka's opinion of Ander. Never once has he spoken ill about him and it wasn't because he's dead. No. A dog could bite Luka's finger, and he would shoot the pup dead on the spot. Sympathy isn't common in a man like Luka.

The door creaks open, and I glance back to see Asiel grabbing a pillow to clutch onto. Thank god. His floor squeaks with each step, but I pray to the lord almighty for Asiel to stay asleep a few minutes longer. From Pacho's instructions, Ander's room is two doors down from Asiel's. Only the maid makes monthly visits to keep the dust from collecting.

Darting back and forth, I triple-check for any lurkers, wanders, but the hallway is empty. Biting the bullet, I open the door and close it as if a fly slipped through the cracks. Ander's room radiates character. The width of his wall is black, grey wooden planks, matching the neutral tone covers. His pillows look brand new, fluffed up. Across his king mattress is a cutout closet filled with all his suits.

A beanbag chair next to his computer set by the balcony. That seems a little out of place, but I guess we all have interests, no? Unlike Asiel's room, there's no bookcase which I thought would be where his secrets lay. This might be harder than I thought. Think Mika! Think like a lonely male with all the power at his fingertips.

Where would I hide something?

My gaze floats over to the painting hanging above Ander's bed. The canvas isn't too large to steal the attention in the room, but rather adorable. It's a messy, raw, first attempt at water painting of the two brothers. Asiel in blue and Ander in red, hugging each other. On the right corner is Asiel's signature and a grade from a teacher.

B+.

Might be biased, but defiantly deserved an A.

My finger skims over the edge of the canvas, accidentally knocking it down. My eyes widen, pressing my body against the wall as I listen to the noises in the hallway. Windy, roaring air is the only thing I can hear. Once I'm sure the coast is clear, I'm met with complete astonishment at my discovery.

There's a hole filled with composition pages of notes, letters detailed to Luka's address, bundles of hundred-dollar bills, two plane tickets to the Netherlands, and a black spiral leather book. Confusion washes over my face as I grab onto the book, betting this has something I can use.

Using my finger, I flick through the pages, causing collages to fall to the floor. Evidence Mika! You're being so fucking careless. Squatting down, I pick up the photos hiding in between the papers. Holy shit. Luka wouldn't want anyone to get their hands on these photos-- it shatters his aura, persona.

Everything makes sense. The entire story from these pictures alone, but how do I make it fit my narrative? How do I frame him in a way that's believable? Thrusting upwards, I grab the envelopes and take the letters out, consuming them like a textbook. They are dated a few months before I killed him.

A lot of arguing.

Confessions, then arguments again.

Secrets.

Drowning in them.

The distance makes the heart wander.

I guess we have three things in common, Ander.

As a sign of mercy, I'll sign Luka's death sentence so you can meet each other again in hell. I hope you don't mind me using him to keep my hands clean.

🥵🥵was that steamy or am I slacking? 👀How do you guys feel about Asiel being a bit more aggressive than usual? Does it make him hotter or do you prefer having him whimpering and fool in Mika's arms? 👀

What do you think Mika discovered in the letters? What's your theory on Ander and Luka's involvement with each other? Do you think Mika is disrespecting Asiel by using Luka as a shield basically to keep the truth save?

I can't wait to hear all your thoughts! A lot of things are going to come out soon though I feel like I always say that ... 😂😂

Thank you for every comment, vote and just reading! I appreciate all the comments you guys leave and I basically live for them!

Love ya ❤️❤️💜