Adagio cantabile
A couple of days had passed before my Angel allowed Meg to return to the world of day. However, he did not allow me to accompany her, apparently afraid that I would use that chance to escape from him. I could not understand why he still did not have enough trust in me... though, when I asked him about that, he explained that it was not me he did not trust but the rest of the world.
"They have never truly appreciated you," he added, gently putting his hand on my cheek, "and now, as I appreciated you the way they should have... they might try to take you away from me. And I do not want to risk it, my child."
Nodding my head, I glanced at my hand; the ring on my finger glistened mysteriously in the dim light of the candles.
Somehow, I could understand why he was so afraid. And at the same time, I simply wanted to be free. Although I knew that my life could now look like this from now on, without me really having my own free will, I still wanted to stay with him. With my Angel. Otherwise, my life would not have any sense.
Until I had met him, it had been a good life, but it had not had any taste. I could live it until my death and I would have not got to know what real life tasted like. But now, as I had met him... I simply could not lose him. He was my everything; my past and my future, and my present. Without him, not only would I not be able to make a step forward, but also I would not be able to step back. I would be stuck at the moment I was at right now.
But I was not only thinking of my future. Simply, I wanted him by my side, and the reasons were as egoistic as possible. His presence made me feel wonderful; safe and needed, and special. I loved the way he praised me – like any woman would love to be praised by an amazing man. I was no different.
At the same time, though, I did respect him. It was not like I treated him like an object who would praise me forever. I wanted to get better and better – just for him. Because he deserved all the best, and I did know that I was not the best just yet. Maybe I would never be, I thought, but if he had chosen me, then I needed to make sure I would get as close to perfection as I only could – therefore I practiced whenever I was able to, and I could feel myself getting better every day, whether I practiced by myself or with him.
However, I felt that I still was not good enough.
"If you overstrain yourself before the great day, all of our hard work will go to waste, Arlette," my Angel at last scolded me when one evening I sat down, completely exhausted after a long day and hardly any sleep at night. "Moreover, if you keep on doing that, you will lose your beautiful voice forever."
In shame, I lowered my sight and bit my bottom lip. I understood that he wanted all the best for me – but I wanted the very same for him, and it seemed to be the best choice. However, he was not satisfied with my choice.
My Angel approached me and knelt down before me, just like he had before, when he had been listening to my heartbeat, and sighed, caressing my cheek. I dared not look up at him, ashamed of myself. I did not want to disobey him... and I truly respected him, but at the same time, I wanted to get better for him.
"What's wrong, my sweetest Arlette?" he asked gently, and the way he uttered my name, once again made me feel butterflies in my stomach as my heart fluttered in my cheek. Although I had stayed in his kingdom for almost half a year already, I still felt like a little girl who had heard a compliment whenever he called me by my name or touched me.
At the same time, though, it made me feel even worse. I felt so guilty for disappointing him, even though I did it all for him.
"Nothing, my Angel," I responded, shaking my head, but although a part of me wanted to move away from him, I simply leant my face closer to his touch. Closing my eyes, I let out a soft sigh. It was such an amazing feeling.
I loved him. With all I had, as much as I could. And every day I learnt to love him even more. That was why I did not want to let him down.
"I know you are doing your best, but you cannot overload yourself. I do not tell you to stop practicing because this is not what you should do. However, you cannot practice all the time. I want you to have some fun as well. You need to recover because what we do is already a lot... you could hurt yourself if you do much more."
Leaning in, he placed a soft kiss on my forehead, soothing me a little bit. I did not even know when my hands found their way to his own, and I slipped my fingers into his grasp. It could have been my imagination, but I was sure I could see him smiling a little.
His thumb brushed against the ring on my finger before he brought my hand closer to his lips to kiss it, as if sealing the promise.
"Monsieur," I started, but he hushed me with just his glance.
"You belong to me, Arlette. And you always will... and this is why I will never let you hurt yourself. Soon, you will be my bride, I promise that to you. You need not do anything more to convince me that you are the one for me. You just need to keep your promises: just... just obey my orders. That's all you need to do."
Without a moment of hesitation, I nodded, knowing that whatever he said, it would be the best choice for me to follow his words. I trusted him more than I trusted myself, and with every next moment I trusted him even more.
Because of Meg's presence, he had begun to wear his mask once again, and now, as I looked into his eyes, I could not help but feel a terrible pain in my chest. Moreover, I had caught him checking on the curtains covering the frames, whatever they were, several times, and it made me even more curious – what could they have been?
Right now, all I wanted to do was to rip this mask off of his face and toss it somewhere he would never be able to retrieve it from. I loved him with his face, the way it was. And yet, now as he put this wall between the two of us, I was afraid of us parting once more. Despite his words, I feared he did not trust me anymore.
Was it because of the incident with Meg? Or something else had made him step away from me? I was not quite sure, but I did not feel comfortable knowing that there was something between us that had not already been there.
From that moment, the days passed on quietly. I followed my Angel's words and now, I spent more time sleeping and simply relaxing, just the way he wanted me to, so I was much stronger than I had been. Our lessons, too, brought more pleasure to me thanks to that. My fears slowly began to go away as I was not so stressed anymore.
When I saw him looking at me, I noticed adoration in his eyes, just like before, when he had first brought me into this world. And still, I did not know how to appreciate it properly... but I felt so thankful deep in my heart that I was sure he could feel it without me saying that out loud. Especially when our eyes met or when he touched me. I realised that – just like I loved him even more – his love for me grew even stronger.
I knew our life was going to change soon. After all, he would at last let me out into the world that had once been my own. I was going to start singing for someone else but him... and I was not quite sure what it all would be like. I would need to get used to what had once been normal to me once again.
It would be a lie to say I was not nervous. At the same time, I truly wanted to get back to my old friends, but I was afraid of meeting them. I felt wonderful, living there, in this kingdom of music and night, just with my Angel and no-one else besides us. In this place, no-one but him could reach me. And that made me feel safe – it was exactly what I needed. What both of us needed. But still, we knew we would not be able to live like this forever.
He had been teaching me so long so I could breathe in some life into the music he had created, and that was my mission. And to complete it, I needed to get back to my old life... even if just for a while. However, I had a feeling that both of us were scared of taking that risk – because it surely was quite risky.
One evening, my Angel stood behind me and wrapped his arms around me, pressing my back against his chest; his chin rested on the top of my head. Knowing that he could not see my face at that moment, I allowed myself to close my eyes and smile softly. However, I had not planned to sigh as deeply as I did.
"My little bird," he sang quietly, playing with my hair; it was way more pleasant than I would have ever suspected it to be. "Will you fly away from me once I set you free? Or shall you return to your cage on your own free will...?"
I understood him perfectly. He was afraid of losing me, but at the same time, I was afraid that the world was going to try to pull me away from him. And that was definitely not something I would ever want. I belonged to my Master. And there was no place for me in the world of the day... my place was right next to him.
"The bird is not going to fly away, her place is right here," I answered in a whisper, but at the same time, I could hear the very same melody in my voice that my Angel had used. "She will never leave her Angel on her own free will."
As he heard that, he turned me in his arms so I would stand right before him, looking into his eyes. His hand gently brushed my hair behind my ear, and he leant in to kiss my forehead. Then my nose. And at last, he planted a gentle kiss upon my lips as his thumb caressed the corner of my mouth.
"When you return to me, my little bird," he responded quietly, this time no longer singing, "I will never let you go again. I promise. As soon as you get back where you belong... I shall make you mine so no-one will ever touch you again."
Although I had been wearing the ring for some time already, I could swear I felt it even better on my finger at that moment.
"I love you, my Angel," I replied only, resting my head on his shoulder, and he tenderly stroked my hair. I felt like a child in her mother's arms... so calm and so safe. I would never wish to leave his embrace again. And yet, I did know that it would be just a couple of days before I needed to leave my nest and start a new life on my own.
It was going to be a hard trial to me. For him, though, I needed to pass this exam perfectly, so we could be together always. He had put so much effort into preparing me to be a wonderful singer. And I had never felt more confident of what I could do... and I knew very well that I was capable of playing the lead – especially since it was his music I was going to sing. On the other hand, though, it would be a completely different singing as I was no longer going to sing it all just for him. There would be so many people listening...
"Just imagine it's the two of us," he answered as I shared my worries with him. Having put his forefinger under my chin, he tipped it gently so I was forced to look directly into his eyes. "I am going to be there – the box five is always meant to be kept empty. If you feel insecure, just look in that direction, and I will be there."
Smiling gently, I nodded. I knew that I could always count on him – however, I was also aware of the fact that the burden laid now on my own shoulders. Once I would get onto the stage, he would no longer be able to protect or help me.
"I will sing it all just for you, my Angel," I replied, smiling, even though I did not remember forming my lips into such a shape. "And all of the world is going to know about your greatness. About the magic concealed in your music."
"It's only you who can push life into their stillness, Arlette. But for now," he kissed my temple one last time, "go and rest. We still have lots of work awaiting us."
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen247.Pro