Song: Stressed Out by Twenty-One Pilots

~~~

I felt weak. The anger was gone, replaced by new fears and anxiety. What if he really did kill Mot, Gaines, and Tom? I felt sick at the thought of it. Dianite and Mianite would be ruined, there's no doubt about that. Mot means the world to Dianite, and...well I know Gaines is the only one who still loves Mianite, so Mianite must love him too. I huffed stressfully and plopped own on the floor of my specter. I need a nap.

It was a stupid thing to do. I stayed in my specter dimension for the rest of the night. I couldn't go back to Tom and Mot and Gaines, knowing that they were on top of Botans kill list. I couldn't. Tom would ask questions about where I've been, I'd try to lie but he would know I was, and then I'd break and tell the truth. I don't want to tell the truth. I want to sulk over it and worry about it in peace. It's selfish, but I think I deserve to be a little selfish after all that's happened.

My old reactor and M.E. system were both still here. I found some blankets and pillows Rose and I used when we got trapped in here awhile ago and used those to sleep on the floor. I wasn't too far from dozing off when my communicator rang. I sighed and held it up to see that it was...Wag. Wag? I would've suspected Tom or Mot, but Wag?

I pressed the call button and let my wrist fall back on the floor. "What?" I asked tiredly.

"What are you doing in your specter sleeping on the floor? That can't be at all comfortable."

My mouth fell open in shock. What the heck? How does he know where I am and what I'm doing?

"How did you-"

"You've forgotten I share a specter room right next to yours. I can see you right now, as creepy as that might sound."

I snapped my head towards the see through walls, only to see Wag standing in his specter room, waving over at me as he held his wrist up to his mouth. Huh. I forgot about that.

"Everyone's worried for you. You disappeared after the meeting and no one could find you. Rosie knew but she wouldn't tell Tom where you went, he's very angry with her."

Angry at my baby? He better not do anything stupid like ground her, I'll slap him for it. She's just protecting me like the little angel she is. "He didn't do anything stupid, did he? She's keeping her promise to me, she's being a good girl."

I watched him "Well Tom was busy with some things. He was out looking for you actually, so Rosie stayed with us. But um...Mot...said some things. But I'm sure he feels bad-"

"What did he say to my baby?"

"It isn't for me to tell! She wasn't too upset over it, she only cried for a few minutes before-"

"HE MADE MY BABY CRY?!"

"I-I should go..."

"JAMES YOU TELL ME WHAT HE SAID NOW."

"Well I-I overheard a few things about being a liar just like her fathers, but-"

"I'll kill him."

"Please don't. We go on the mission to revive Dianite soon, we can't have him dead before it."

"He made my baby cry. I don't care, he's dead."

"W-What if I told Tom instead? You seem very tense over something, perhaps you should just stay here and rest. I'm sure Tom will be just as upset and he can deal with Mot. And...I am a little scared you might do something very stupid and regret it very much later on. Please stay here?"

I thought on it for awhile. Tom would be just as upset with Mot as me, maybe even more so because he's got the shortest temper I've ever seen. I feel like Mot would get the worst punishment from him. "...you tell Tom I want that asshole to apologize to our baby girl, okay?"

I watched him nod furiously from the other room. "Yes I promise, I'll tell him as soon as I see him. But...I'm still very worried for you Jordan. Why are you in here?"

I didn't want to look at him anymore. I slid behind a row of chests to cover myself and leant against them, sighing. "I just need to be alone for a little while."

"And why is that?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"That's not being very fair Jordan."

"I don't care what's fair anymore. Nothing is fair Wag. The balance is off, Ianite is dead, there is no equality. It's just...pure revenge now. M'lady would probably cry if she saw what was going on." People turning against people to save their own skins, destroying villages as they burn to the ground, sacrificing innocent young parents in hopes that they can hold on to their miserable lives a second longer. Who told them that sacrifice was the answer anyway? I bet it was Botan himself. Who else would've done such a thing?

"Your lady would cry if she heard what you were saying. I thought your duty as an Ianitee was to restore balance? Don't you believe in that anymore?"

I rolled my eyes and let my head fall against the wood of the chest. "It's hard to restore balance when everything and everybody is working to destroy it all at once."

"Martha hasn't been able to sleep in months because of the loss of balance. She feels pain from it, Jordan. Just like her mother did. Whenever you commit an act of balance, the pain lessens on her. When we saved those refugees, when you comforted that frightened girl and Tucker cared for that infant, she was able to get good nights rest. She appreciates your deeds, and so do I. We don't work against you. You're not as alone as you think."

"Okay, so I'm not alone. And I do help people when I commit acts of balance. But Botan doesn't care about balance, and balance doesn't get all of us home. So it's useless to me."

"Isn't that the slightest bit selfish though?"

"Can't I be selfish every once in awhile?"

"Yes, but not enough to loose your focus on wrong and right. Tom is worried, everyone is. Go home and explain to him why you're upset. Remember that some of us are going through much more misery than you are at the moment, let that be your inspiration to pep up a little."

I frowned. "Who's going through misery? Martha? Because if she is, I can-"

"No! No no, Martha she-...she's fine, she's strong and...yes, she's fine. I'm more leaning towards Gaines, but Martha isn't-"

"Gaines? What's wrong with Gaines, did he tell you something?" I shuffled out from the chests to look back over at Wag, who seemed to be a mess because he revealed a little too much information. He nervously scratched the back of his head and turned in the opposite direction.

"N-Nothing, I shouldn't have said any-"

"Tell me! Gaines is like a brother to me, I need to know if something's wrong!"

"Nothing necessarily wrong. He's just-...having some relationship problems..."

"Relationship pro-" I stopped mid sentence when the familiar sound of my portal opening caught my ears. I quickly turned expecting it to be Botan back to snap my neck in two, but was utterly confused when I saw an irritated Gaines step through the portal.

Huh. That's coincidental.

He was mumbling under his breath and fiddling with something in his hands. His cheeks were flushed, his hair was a mess, and his glasses were crooked sideways. "No good...stupid...inconsiderate...ugh. Gods, here." He trudged over to me and thruster the object into my hands. I didn't even have a chance to say anything before he was turning his back and storming off towards the portal.

"Gaines woah, wait! What is this?" I ran after him and tugged at his T-shirt, flinching when he turned around so quickly it seemed inhumanly possible.

"What do you want?" He asked, venom spewing out of every syllable. I felt my chest swell with anger at his tone. I wiped a droplet of spit off my cheek and took a deep breath. He's upset, there's no use in getting angry at him.

"To know what Mianite did to make you so angry."

He growled at the mention of the gods name. "It's none of your concern. Stop nosing into business that doesn't belong to you." He tried to whip around and leave, but I grabbed his wrist and pulled him back before he could go anywhere. He put a fight, that's for sure. He tugged and pulled, until his wrist was raw and he was hissing like a maniac. What in the world did Mianite do to him?

"It's my concern because I care about you and I'm concerned that somebody is hurting you. What's going on?"

He didn't budge, and kept on yanking his arm back with angry fire dancing behind his widened irises. "Let. Go. Of. My. Wrist."

"Not until you tell me."

He muttered something then, something on a different language that I had no idea what it meant. I gasped as a violent shock went through my arm and up my spine, taking the air right out of my lungs and causing me to loosen my grip on Gaines. What the heck was that? What did he just do to me?

I kept on to his wrist despite the pain, and he kept muttering things under his breath at ninety miles an hour. More shocks, I felt like I was getting striked by tiny bolts of lightening all over my skin. It hurt, but I've experienced worse pain. I didn't let go of his wrist even as I was practically gasping for air in front of him. Gaines only smirked at me.

"Just because you are the champion of a god, doesn't make you the least bit threatening. Look at me Jordan! I'm champion of my so called god and nobody spares a second glance in my direction! Doesn't feel good being overpowered by others you thought to be weak, does it? Does it?"

A huge array of shock attacked my chest and I screamed, letting go of his wrist and crumbling to the floor. I could hear Wags yells through my communicator as I laid there, crippled by sharp pain poking at every piece of skin and bone. I felt water droplets falling onto my face and thunder in my ears as I struggled to get air. Champion? He's Mianite's champion? But I thought Jeriah was, that's what Ianite told me once. He was Mianite's top blood soldier and greatest champion.

Unless he picked a new one.

"I'm sick of it! I've been busting my ass for everyone, I've been losing sleep, I've been killing myself trying to fix everything and it's useless! You don't even care, nobody does! Not even Mianite! He gave me these acolyte powers and he didn't...he didn't even tell me how to control them! I was stuck with them, do you know how much pain I went through? What I'm still going through? All I want is some appreciation, some gratitude...I've been working on that portal to get you home for so long and you never even thanked me once for it. Nobody has. Mianite never thanks me anymore either. He doesn't even listen to me, let alone thank me for spending sleepless nights on his stupid reactors. He won't-...he won't look at me anymore Jordan..." The pain began to lessen as Gaines fell to the floor, figure slumping right next to where I was laying. I would've said something had I not been in excruciating pain, but it's kind of hard to comfort somebody when you're writhing in agony.

"Do you ever feel like it's just pointless to do anything...like your while life is meaningless less and...nothing matters?" He sounded like he was on the verge of tears. I groaned and hit my head against the floor in frustration. Curse my stupid balanced head, I would've attacked him already if it weren't for that little voice in the back of my head telling me to help him. I huffed and managed to get myself propped on my elbows so I could actually talk to him face to face. He looked so miserable. Wag was right.

"Your-...you're life isn't m-meaningless, your so s-smart Gaines...you could...you could do so much with your p-powers..." Every word felt like tiny stabs of pain inside my mouth, but I tried not to show my pain.

He sighed and slumped over even more. "Yeah right. I'm set to serve Mianite my whole life. Our contact says so..."

"H-He...made you s-sign a con...contract?" Oh no. That's a bad sign. Tucker was forced to sign a blood contract and he ended up killing my first daughter because of it.

"When I first started working for him, he signed me a deal to serve him my whole life in exchange for necessities to live. It seemed great at first, but now...ugh. I don't know."

"H-How can you...g-get out of it?" There must be some leak in it, some way to get out of it.

He shrugged. "It lasts until death. Whether that be him or I...and I think I know who's going to be the first to go. So yes, my life is completely controlled by him. He's also slowly destroying it as well, so that's wonderful. Seriously, what god gives their champion divine powers that can very well destroy the world and not tell them a thing about how to use them?"

"I-I can think of one..." I chuckled shakily. Except I didn't just get a small share of powers, I got the bad end of the deal and I got nearly all of the power. My payment for that? Sleepless, nightmarish nights with poor insomniac Tom rocking me back and forth as I screamed his ears off. I also got some pretty nifty tattoos and purple eyes, with purple hair to match. And with the small accessory of insanity of course. Yay.

Gaines looked down at me with sudden pity and guilt. "I guess I shouldn't be one to talk. Your god died before she could teach you anything. At least Mianite is still alive. Hopefully one day he'll teach me how to use this correctly." He motioned up towards the ceiling, where I just noticed some angry storm clouds hanging around up top. Ah. So that's where the rain came from. And the thunder. Gaines can control weather. That could be very useful.

"Yeah...and hopefully he'll teach you to not use it on people, like your friends for instance." I sat up, wincing at the dulled pain still lingering in my body.

"Oh Jordan, I'm sorry. I've been just a mess lately. You were the last straw that set me off I suppose. I can try to make the rest of the pain go away? But I'm still getting the hang of it, so...I might make a mistake."

I propped myself up against the chests again and sighed. "Go ahead. You need to practice on somebody I guess."

His face lit up with a large smile at my agreement. Before I could even prepare myself, he curled his fingers around my ankle and squeezed it. I felt warm. Like my whole body was suddenly a furnace, like the sun was shining directly over me and crisping me to bacon. I jerked my leg away before I could fry to death, and Gaines giggled at my suffering through teary eyes. At least I'm making him laugh, right?

"H-Hey, the pains gone! Um, you did a good job dude. I don't think you need Mianite to get the hang of your powers, you're doing awesome on your own."

"It is a lot more complicated than that Jordan. There are bigger things that are difficult to control. For instance...I haven't a clue on how to stop that." He pointed at the angry rain clouds, threatening to spill buckets of water at any time without mercy.

"Well...maybe it's connected to your mood somehow. Sometimes my powers are connected to my mood."

"So I just...become happy and they'll go away?"

"I guess so."

He pondered on it for a moment, before turning his head back to me and smiling. "Do you mind if I try something?"

"Um...sure?" I barely had time to get my answer out before he leaned forward and pressed his lips against mine.

Oh gods, not this again.

I didn't pull away, mainly because I didn't want to get soaking wet by his rain clouds. So I waited. He didn't seem to wanna move away so quickly though. He kissed me with emotion, that's for sure. I could practically feel every sad, angsty, angry thought and emotion he was feeling in the kiss. Although Gaines was a good kisser, that didn't make me feel any better about the kiss he was giving to me. I resisted the urge to shove him off and run out my portal, hop straight back into Toms arms where I could kiss him senseless and apologize over and over again about kissing yet another person in my specter dimension. I guess as long as Gaines doesn't unzip my pants, I'll be okay.

He pulled away, and didn't unzip my pants. He leaned against me for the longest time, his forehead pressed against mine as he panted softly on my flushed cheeks. I had no idea where to look with my eyes as he kept his shut. This is so awkward.

"You know I wish you weren't married," he said, eyes finally opening to bore directly into mine. "I would pick you over him in a heartbeat. Tom is a very lucky man."

I don't understand. What's so special about me that everyone seems to like? The wizards hit on me when I first met them, so did Mot, and even Dianites called me cute a time or two.

'You are pretty adorable boyo. It's hard not to fall in love with you. Mots even considered bargaining with Syndy for a threesome with you.'

I didn't need to know that. I'm gonna pretend you didn't tell me that. Okay. Bye Dianite.

'Offers still on the table Glitter lap. When I get my body back, we could even have a bit of a foursome if-'

Nope! Shut up please, I can't think about this right now. Thank you. Bye.

'Aw, don't you wish to know how much Mot is willing to pay for you? He must adore you to pieces if he'll pay a whole chest of gold for a night with you.'

I'm not a prostitute.

'Motty boy wishes you were sometimes.'

Why are we having this conversation right now.

'I'm bored Glitter Crotch. Mot isn't the best of company you know, he tends to ignore me and it hurts me very much.'

I'm not a relationship counselor. Why does everyone think that I am.

'You're better than anyone at comforting, so perhaps that's why we all run to you for help. This is very entertaining however, I had no clue my brothers little servant had so much rage built up inside of himself. It's quite comical.'

Stop making fun of Gaines.

"Th-Thank you. I...I guess I would date you too if Tom didn't exist." But Tom does exist and I love him, and I love my baby girl too. I wouldn't trade them for the world.

Dianite snorted inside my head. 'His head is filled of memories with my brother. It's sickening.'

That's rude.

'I'm not talking about the little servant, I'm talking about my pathetic brother. Taking the poor boys virginity and then just leaving him alone for a week after to deal with it. My brother gave him his powers during that, can you believe such a thing? I would be rage filled too if I were the boy. I would never do that to my Mot. What an awful thing to do to a boy his age. No wonder he's longing for you at the moment.'

Longing for me? I wish there was something I could do. I can't believe Mianite would do that to him.

"Gaines...do you want to talk about it? What happened?" He wasn't leaning against my forehead anymore, but he was in the work of burying himself into my shoulder. I gave him a small awkward pat on the back, and Dianite laughed at me.

"Not really. Thank you for offering, but...I'm not sure I can do it without having another fit."

"I just want to understand the uh...pain, I guess, that you're going through. So I can help."

'Well you asked for this boyo.'

Wait. What?

The breath was knocked out of me as the scene around us began to change. The translucent walls turned to navy blue ones with gears and mechanical parts painted onto them. Gaines was longer leaning against me, he was laying in a bed in the middle of the room with his shirt off, clutching his baby blue covers for dear life as Mianite gathered up his own shirt from the floor.

"You-...you can't stay a little while longer?" Gaines asked the older man timidly. His hands were shaking and he was on the brink of tears, but Mianite didn't seem to notice or care.

"Unfortunately no. I have much work to catch up on. I will see you again Devi, goodbye now." And then, without a sudden glance backwards at the boy, he left. How could he do that? It's obvious Gaines was a shaking mess, how could he leave him alone to deal with all of that?

Gaines began to cry. It wasn't just silent tears either, it was sobbing and it was downright heartbreaking.

"Dianite, please take me back." I don't want to watch this. The scene began to fade just as storm clouds began to appear above his bed.

He took me back to the present, where Gaines still sat with his head on my shoulder. I gathered him up in my arms and I gave him the warmest, caring hug I've ever given. "I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that, he's an idiot for doing that to you. First times are meant to be special."

He sank into my hold at the words, and I knew he'd be comfortable with telling me everything. "It was special. It was wonderful, until he gave me the powers and...he just fled like he'd just committed a murder or something. I thought it was me. I thought I did something wrong, it's why I cried for so long."

"Did he even tell you he was giving you powers?"

"Yes, he...said he wanted to give me something to protect myself with. That he loved me and he wanted to keep me safe if something ever happened to him. Then he said some formal speech about champions and...he gave them to me."

'Jeriah is going to be furious,' Dianite chuckled.

I'm furious. I wish Mianite was here so I could punch his teeth in.

"Are you okay? Like are you actually okay Gaines? Because if you're not-"

"I'll be okay Jordan. Thank you for caring. I just wish he would speak to me, he barely even glanced in my direction when he gave me the interloper."

"Well...a good old emotional outburst in front of him might do the job?"

He laughed into my chest. "Yes, that always seemed to work. I might do that."

I sighed in content as a warm aura blanketed me, not unlike the one from earlier that nearly scorched me to death. I hugged Gaines closer as the aura spread. At least he's a little happy now.

"Are you staying in here for the night? And if so...do you mind if I stay as well?"

"You can stay here as long as you want, I've got sleeping bags and tons of blankets and pillows. I'll probably leave in the morning though, Toms probably looking for me and I don't want to worry him anymore than I have to."

Once I got all of the supplies out and set up, Gaines and I went straight to bed. I had to call Wag back though (who had left his specter seconds after I was attacked, so that was kind of hurtful), to assure him that everything was fine and Gaines didn't mean to actually hurt me. He didn't answer, so I left a voice mail in hopes that he would open it later. After that was done, I hit the sleeping bag as fast as possible, eager to get some sleep. Hopefully I won't have any nightmares while Gaines is here. I wouldn't want to scare him or anything.

I dozed off pretty quickly. It didn't seem like I was out long before I woke up again because of a few noises. Gaines was facing away from me in his sleeping bag, but he was clearly not asleep. His breathing was weird and he was huddled up in a ball, holding his blankets like they were an actual living person he was cuddling with.

'Go cuddle with the boy, Glitter lap.'

What? No I can't cuddle with him, I'm with Tom.

'Tom would do the same if it meant helping another person with their misery. The boy wanted my brother to hold him more than anything that night, and he never got that. He's miserable just thinking about it. Crying and holding a pile of blankets as a substitute. Pity the boy Glitter bum.'

A scene flashed inside of my head, Gaines staring at an empty space in his bed as tears leaked down his blotched cheeks.

Ugh.

I slipped out of my covers and bag, drug the set up over where Gaines was curled up, and laid down right behind him. Here goes nothing I guess.

I slowly draped my arm over his waist, resisting the urge to jump back when he flinched slightly at my gesture. I let my arm rest there for a little while. Eventually he eased up, and he even turned over to face me, surprisingly. He had been crying, the red blotches covered his cheeks just like they did in the memory. "Why?" He asked, voice scratchy and riddled with exhaustion.

"Tom would do the same for you, and you would do the same for me or Tom. Do you not like it?"

He shrugged absentmindedly and scooted a lot closer to me, before letting his head rest against my chest like he had hours before. He's okay with it I guess.

'He's very thankful for it. Wishes he could be as lucky as Tom.'

"You can have anyone you want. You don't need me or Mianite, you can do perfectly well on your own in the relationship department."

"I'm more awkward than anyone I've ever known..."

"Then you clearly haven't met 20 year old Jordan. Two years ago I was the most awkward person ever, way worse than you. And look at me now. I've got a really cute bad boy following me around everywhere. You'll find somebody too, somebody who will treat you exactly how you deserve to be treated."

"I very much hope so. I'm going to miss you when you leave back to your home world. Things were very dull before I met you and your friends."

"I'm gonna miss you too. You uh...you have the option of coming with us too, you know. Our world is a little less...evolved, but I'm sure you'll like it. We have a Mianite too."

He chuckled. "That sounds tempting, but I don't think I could. Contract, remember?"

I frowned. "Well...if he dies-"

"No no, we don't need anymore dead gods. I love him too much to see him fall. He may be inconsiderate and terribly idiotic, but I know he means well and that he cares about me. I'm sure he left for a very good reason, and I'm sure...if I ever wanted to leave him, he would allow me to."

"Okay. But Gaines if he ever does something to hurt you, you don't hesitate to get away from him. You come to our world and you can live with me and Rosie and Tom. Our Mianite doesn't have contracts, so you'd be working for a really awesome guy." I can imagine us all living in one house, eating breakfast with each other every morning and spending time with each other. Rosie loves Gaines, he's not one of her greatest friends like Matt, but she does love hanging out with him. He could be like a big brother to her. Well...if she keeps growing at this rate, he'll be the younger brother.

"If it comes to that, then I will. Thank you Jordan. I hope I can finish the portal for all of you after you revive Dianite. If I keep working on it, I'm sure I can get it done by then."

"Do you by chance know when we're going? Because I've been here all day and-"

"The wizards are having some arguments about it, so I can imagine it's going to be another few days. Are you worried?"

"Yeah, I am. But I know things will be alright. I just wish I could have a conversation with my lady before we go."

"I wish I could have a conversation with my god as well," Gaines laughed. "I should be getting some sleep. Goodnight Jordan."

"Night Gaines." I closed my eyes and tightened my hold on him, as if it would help protect him somehow. I don't want anything to happen to him. I've got to keep him safe.

'Sometimes I wish Gods did not possess the ability to see into the future.'

What? Why do you say that?

'You better take care of that boy after all of this is over Sparklez. He's going to need you.'

Dianite you're scaring me. Is something going to happen to Gaines?

'Just watch those dreams of yours for answers. I've got to go check up on Mot now. Sweet dreams.'
~~~
IF THERES ONE THING IM GOOD AT ITS FORESHADOWING AND TORTURING YOU GUYS LOLOL
I'm listening to Twenty-one pilots because I was peer pressured and I am loving it surprisingly! Stressed Out is my favorite song so far. What's your guys' favorite song or band? I'm looking for some new music and I'd love some opinions from y'all :3

Leave a favorite or a comment if you enjoyed! I love you all and have a nice night <3

- Lee