Toms p.o.v.

"Tom, why aren't you eating?"

Damn. I thought he'd forgotten about that.

I stared at my plate of food with seething hatred. I don't actually know why I wont eat anything, I just don't want to. I had told Nade about it before because I knew it wasn't exactly normal. Nade just gave me a stack of chocolate and told me to eat that, which I had no trouble eating. It's just that after I eat, it all comes back up in blood, and then I won't eat anything at all.

Vomiting blood has really been the most terrifying thing that's come out of this, aside from having to make a statement about Tom in court. I don't know why I couldn't do that either. I thought I was a brave person, able to face whatever obstacles. I had overcome the fear of facing Tom. Now my greatest fear was so stupid, I didn't want to tell Sparklez about it.

Vomiting blood and being really sick after surgery is normal, right? It's just a side affect. That's it. It's nothing to be worried about.

'Dont think that's quite true, boyo.' Dianites voice entered my head.

Shut it, and quit reading my mind. I hate when gods do that.

'Just trying to help, my apologies.'

"I dunno." One of the biggest lies ever told by me.

Sparklez sighed from behind me, and pulled out a chair from the table. He rubbed his temples and then looked up to me with a frustrated expression.

"Please just tell me. I'm tired of secrets. If you think it's unnecessary or too awful to tell me, then tell me anyway."

He placed a hand on mine, a warmness spread through me. Why was he so good at this relationship thing?

"I just don't like to eat anymore..." It was true, but he wanted more.

"And you don't like to because?"

I knew he'd make a big deal of me not eating, but I didn't want him to. I wanted to heal. I wanted to heal as fast as possible and then we'd get married and then we'd move on with life.

"It taste bad..."

"The food I made taste bad? Or every food you eat taste bad?"

"Everything I eat...it's just not good anymore. And it makes me sick. I keep puking blood...is that even normal?"

"Well...I don't know. I'd have to see what Dec and Champ had to say about it. But I know that when everything you eat taste bad, then somethings wrong. You were eating chocolate a couple days ago, did that taste bad?"

"It didn't taste bad then, but now it taste horrible. Like I'm eating plastic or something. It didn't taste bad, but when I ate Nades chocolate I got sick. I don't know what's happening to me..."

"Yeah this is bad. We might have to take you to Champs."

I groaned and banged my head on the table. I didn't want to go back and have them cut me up again. I barely survived the first time...

"Why don't you want to get better? Don't you like surviving?" His tone was sarcastic.

"I just want to marry you and stop being in this damn wheelchair. I'm tired of injuries and drama and all of this crap. I just wanna heal and make out with you all day..."

He laughed at me, and I cracked a smile. I felt his arms wrap around me. I raised up and looked into his eyes.

"You can't heal if you can't eat, you butt. It'll be a quick visit, I promise. You'll be fine. I'm sure it's nothing major." He kissed my forehead playfully, and picked my plate up from the table.

But he didn't get it. I didn't want to eat. It wasn't because I was getting sick, it was just because I didn't want to.

I'm not sure if Dec or Champ could fix that.

~

"Take two a day, and space out hours in between. Maybe two or three between each pill. It should help with the vomiting and stuff." Champ put a bright orange pill bottle in my hands, and I wanted to puke at the sight of it.

"And what about his poor eating habits? Is that gonna go away too?" Sparklez stood by the stark white bed, his hand on my back providing me comfort.

"It should, just keep taking them like I said to and it will work. On the bright side, you look way better than you did a few days ago dude. Glad that you're doing okay." Champ gave me a smile while he put his check up tool in the drawers.

~

The pills weren't working. I'd been taking them a full week, and I still couldn't eat without feeling sick.

The vomiting subsided, but only because I hadn't eaten anything in days. I'd stay in my room all day, pretending to be resting. Sparklez would bring me food three times a day, and I'd pretend to be starving and I'd take the food.
But then I would feed it to Terrence. He stayed in my room more often now that I was home.

Sparklez would come kiss me goodnight after ten o clock, and then he would go back to his towers. He'd arrive first thing in the morning at the crack of dawn and fix me breakfast. The cycle continued, and I felt so much guilt for lying to him. He was trying to help me, and I was lying to him.
I need advice from someone who would understand me, and not rat me out. I need Tucker's advice.

So when Sparklez left at ten o'clock, I immediately called Tucker up on my communicator. He was usually up at night, and slept during the day. His sleeping schedule had changed since we'd been here. I remember when he used to wake me up in the morning in the land of Mianite. I missed those times.

My device rang for a bit, and stopped when Tucker's voice picked up.
"Hey Tom, what's up? Champ told me you were feeling better." He didn't sound the least bit tired.

"That's what I need to talk to you about, could you maybe come over and talk to me a bit? But don't let anyone know you're coming, I don't want anyone else to know."

"Sure dude, be over in a bit." He hang up. This is why I needed his advice, because I knew he wouldn't pry on the little things.

He was over in what seemed like a minute, since he was using his air sigil. That blood magic junk was pretty useful.

He came in my room and knocked on the door. "Itssss Johnny!" His voice yelled from behind the door.
I laughed, and he opened the door and stuck his head in. "Hey man, how's it going?" He entered my room and sat on the bed, Terrence ran to his legs and purred against them.

"I need advice on something that's really making me worry, but I don't want Sparklez to know about it. Can you keep a secret?"

"Sure man. Tell me about it, I'm all ears." He reached down and pet Terrence on his lid, and he purred even more.

"So...I'm not eating. I haven't eaten anything in a solid week. I told Sparklez about it when this first started two weeks ago, and he took me to Champ. Champ gave me some pills, but they aren't working at all. I've been lying to Sparklez and telling him that I'm eating, but I'm really just feeding my food to Terrence. I know I should tell him but...I just don't want to eat anything Tucker. I don't feel hungry anymore, and everytime I do try to eat, I get sick. I feel weird when I see food...like it's gross and it makes me feel really gross when I eat it...what do you think is wrong with me?" It was a lot to tell, and I was already tearing up slightly. I was such a baby, crying over my feelings...

"Uh, I'm no doctor or anything, but that sounds like a disorder buddy. Some disorders you can't take pills for, you just need therapy and all of that stuff. Sonj had one before, but it wasn't really bad. She told me she thought she had depression, and she didn't know why. We talked it over, and decided we needed to spend more time around eachother. So that's what we did, and she tells me she doesn't feel it any more. But I'm not sure about you...I don't know much about eating disorders. I feel like you need medical help but...not sure if Champ and Dec can help you. They're more of the medicine type of guys, not about the feelings and stuff to do with your mind. If I were you, I'd just wait it out. See if the feelings go away after another week, and if they don't, tell Jordan about it. I'm sure there's something you guys can do. Sorry you're feeling bad, buddy. I wish there was something I could do." He threw an arm around my shoulder and roughed up my hair.

"You have helped. Glad I'm not dying or anything...I'm glad it's just a disorder. I guess I'll do what you said and wait this out. It seems like a good idea."

But it wasn't. Turned out, it was a terrible idea.
~~~~~~~~
I AM BAWLING
IANITE LEFT AND OH MY GOD PLEASE SOMEONE STOP THE ONIONS DX
EVEN JORDAN LOOKED SAD AND DEPRESSED WHEN SHE LEFT
WHY DID SHE LEAVE! I LEFT TO SONJAS STREAM FOR TWO MINUTES AND I COME BACK AND SHES LEAVING DDXXX
;((((((
My feels are broken...I gotta go and dry them off the floor.
Hope you guys liked the chapter! Leave a favorite if you did, thanks!
- Lee