🥀Dee🥀

As I waited for an answer, (name) just had a staring contest. I was scared to hear what she had to say, but I think she was also nervous about that too. Her eyes then shifted away from me, trying to look at anything else. But my brows furrowed as I began to grow impatient.

"We made a deal..." I reminded her. "Don't tell me you're backing out of it now."

"Tch. I'm not. It's just..." She sighed, frustratedly. "...I never thought this was how we'd talk about this. I'm glad you brought it up, but- you know what I'll say will be completely unfiltered, right?"

"I expect it to be. After you met with Heavy at the mall, he told me that I was the reason why you never talked to me or my family anymore."

"Huh. So that's where the "why you hate me" thing came from." (Name) then began to put away the game as she continued. I also helped clean up. "The funny thing is, I don't hate you. There's more to it than that. Ever since I was discharged from the hospital, my family, and recently Heavy, have been constantly telling me that we were friends and probably something more, but I don't buy it, because from what I can remember, I don't like you as a person."

I frowned hearing that come out of her. But, there was more for her to say.

"You were a jerk since the day we met. Since I first started school and up to the day I got attacked. Hell, me being around you was the main reason why all this shit happened to me. My family and I came here to get away from this sort of problem like last time. First it was my brother who got hurt, and now me. We never deserved this.." She whispered that part but I still heard it. "So, I figured any involvement with you, or any other boy, after the incident would just bring me more pain. Though, I thought you would be glad to be rid of me. Contrary to what everyone's been telling me....ugh! I just don't get it! As much as I trust my family's word, I can't accept the idea that you even saw me as a friend, or a person. Wasn't that a boundary that you set around the deal? You wanted me at arms length. So what could have possibly changed after that because... When I think of you, all I see is the bad, and when I look at you now..."

We both lifted our heads from cleaning and we locked eyes. Both of us had pained expressions. I was taking in every word that (name) was throwing at me. Everything she was telling me was true. I did want distance. I tried to keep it that way. But after getting to know her, I got attached. I saw for who she was and that changed everything. But she can't remember all that anymore. And (name)? Well, I knew she was only venting from her perspective. Everyone knows the full story, except her, and she seems to only trust her own mind above others. Aside from that speculation, visually, she was on the verge of breaking down.

"W-when..I look at you now... I feel fear. And guilt. And anger... But I just don't get it. Why?.. why, at the same time, do I not want that? Why is it you that tortures me?"

I broke away from the eye contact as we were done cleaning up the games. I sat up on the carpet floor while (name) put the games on one of her desk tables. She came to sit back down on the floor too, but kept that distance she wanted. Then, out of the void, Bella came through the small opening of the bedroom door. When the pup saw me, she sprinted to my lap, barking and jumping and shaking from the aggressive wags of her tail. Well, that never changed. I smiled as I picked up the dog and set her in the center of my crossed legs. (Name) stared at us in somewhat confusion. I noticed as I pet the puppy.

"I know you don't remember, but I gave you this puppy on your birthday."

"I've... been told. Why did you give me Bella?"

"A few days before your party, Heavy and I were in charge of your birthday, slash, Christmas presents. I was trying to figure out what to get you when I saw you scrolling through pictures of newborn puppies during class. Then, I went to a shelter and a mother dog just so happened to have given birth to her litter. I paid $300 for Bella-"

"$300?!"

"Uh, yeah. And Heavy bought the bowl, collar, and a sweater and booties. Heheh, your reaction to his gift was funny, but it was worth seeing your next reaction when you saw Bella..."

As the fluffy chihuahua was now sleeping soundly on my lap, I gave (name) one final stare, finally answering her question.

"I got her for you, because I grew to care about you. You were right about what you said before. I was an asshole when we met. I wanted to keep you away and I wanted to be alone. But without realizing it, I broke my own rule of our deal and in the process.. I fell in love with you.... And what we had, cost you more than me. And I'm sorry for everything. The early mistreatment, the targeting you endured, the assault, your trauma, you getting fired at the cafe-"

"How did you know I got fired?.. How did you know where I worked??"

Fuck! I wasn't supposed to know about her job! Why did I say that!? "Uuuhh..H-hear me out, when you never came back to school or came around to see us. We came to see you, b-but you never talked to us."

(Name) glared, "riiight..?"

"One day, during spring break, I wanted to try to talk to you one last time. I chickened out, but I saw you walking away from your house s-so I.. followed you and found out about your job."

"You what?!"

"I know! I know how that sounds! I just wanted to see you so badly, but I had a feeling you didn't want to see me so--"

"So you decide to just stalk me at work?! For how long??"

"...over a year?"

The look of disgust was all over (name)'s face and body language. She couldn't believe what she was hearing as she held her head in one hand. She then stood up and began pacing the room like a madman. I needed more time to explain and apologize. I put Bella onto the bed and reached for (name)'s shoulder for her to stop, but she smacked it away.

"Don't. Touch me!"

"I'm sorry! (Name), believe me when I say I never intended to hurt you or push you into doing anything against your will. All I wanted was to reconnect, but I was too much of a pussy to approach you. And in the end, I just wanted to see you smile and be safe. But then your manager told me that you got fired on grounds that weren't your fault and I'm sorry! I didn't mean for that to happen but it was all my fault! Please forgive me-"

"No."

"But, (name).."

"I should have known it was you... I saw you, in that black hoodie, every day I worked and it never ONCE crossed my mind.. get out. Find Heavy, and leave. I hate to do this to him b-but I can't.. I can't t-take it anymore... Not with you here.."

$~$~$~$

After Heavy and I left the Mikhailov's home, we felt worse than when we first came by. I really fucked up. I can't believe I was this stupid! I had a chance to be on good terms with (name) again and I blew it! Smooth move, Dee, you fucking idiot. It was probably a good thing that her family was out working when this all went down. If not, I probably would have gotten my ass torn a new one by her brothers, maybe her dad. Either way, it might be another year before (name) thinks about talking to me talking again, maybe not even at all.

"Heavy," I turned to my brother, "I'm sorry for-"

"Ruining this meeting?"

"Y-yeah."

Heavy just shrugged. "It's cool, I knew you would."

"W-what??"

"Dude. When you told me you got her fired the first time, I knew you wouldn't be able to keep it from her for long. It had to come out."

"So you were eavesdropping on us?"

"Duh, but I really did go to the bathroom before all that, but back to what I was gonna say. Both of you were able to get your guilty consciences out. All you guys need now is a little time to settle in the feelings before taking the next step."

"You had this planned all along."

"Yup."

I was surprised. How did my usual-idiot-younger brother come up with this? I couldn't think of a solid plan for over a year and yet this bastard had it down in just a few days?! I couldn't believe this was happening. But if Heavy really did plan this, and he's really okay with how this day ended, I guess I had no choice but to follow along.

"So, what's the next step."

"Reconciliation."

(Hey y'all, sorry for the long wait. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, though it might be a little short. I really just needed to get it out cuz I'm getting the dreaded writer's block. Thank you for sticking around.

On another note, I had just dealt with a really annoying user in my comments on this book and God, does it ruin the mood to even continue writing, or what?

[The organization in the comment section on Wattpad is so weird, idk they updated it like this, but I think you can tell which comment follows the other]

I deleted this interaction cuz, not that I'm saying you would, but I'm not here to call people out and have it result in online harassment just because my fifies got hurt. Though I don't know if I only deleted it from my eyes and you can still find it somehow, but still, don't harass them, please.

And while I know that I should know better than to respond to a person like this for whatever reason, I really don't think they should've spoken to me the way they did, and for all I know, they could be speaking the same way to someone else.

I had told this person that if they're only here to shit on someone else's writing, in this case; my writing, on how cringe it is and not give actual feedback to help me improve, then they shouldn't be talking and should just leave. That's not how you talk to another human being in any way, even on the internet. You're not untouchable just because you hide behind a shitty pfp and screen, because if you keep talking like that someone else, somehow, WILL come after you by any means. And that's some real shit. But anyways..

I post these stories to have harmless fun to share with others, and it can really take ONE bad apple, ONE really bad day to make me stop and abandon all my works entirely out of spite and/or discouragement. So if you really want to support and encourage aspiring writers to do better, give criticism, not empty, insulting opinions that contribute nothing. And if you can't even do something as simple as that, stfu and gtho.

Okay...I think that's enough venting. I really do try not to let these things get under my skin, but it does kinda hurt, y'know? Well, that's all. I'll do my best to continue writing this book, since it's my longest and most popular one, but do feel free to check out my other works if you're interested while you wait. Some of them are a little old and justifiably cringe, so read at your own risk, lmao. Have a good one y'all, YEET--)