"She is seventy apparently," Praneet commented to Madhu in the hotel lobby. She nodded disinterested. The grandma didn't step inside the hotel but had ordered everyone to assemble at the lounge for wedding shopping. The haste of the old lady irked Madhu.
Vikram paced around the hotel lobby. He despised the old lady and it showed in his mannerisms. The time was two p.m. already and the old lady would have reached Bangalore at noon. He couldn't wait for another minute to welcome his beloved grand mom and show her the directions to the graveyard.
His keenness confused Krish. "Are you glad to meet her?" He questioned.
The last meeting between Rati and Vikram as far as  Krish remembered was an attempted murder where Vikram threw a brick at Rati in a drunken state.
Rati had called Vikram a man-whore and cursed him to contract AIDS from his one-night stand.
"I am waiting to throw a brick this time," Vikram commented to Krish, passing a nasty stare at him.
His dad stood alongside Praneet and Madhu near the entrance with a sweet box in his hands. Vikram failed to poison that box.
A taxi reached the hotel entrance with a noisy passenger. The old woman threatened the driver and threw money in his face. Vikram scrunched his nose when he had a glimpse of her from the lobby.
His dad moved forward with a fake happy face to receive his mother. "Welcome home, maa," Sooraj hugged her after a long time.
"Is this hotel your home?" Rati questioned him, moving behind from his hug. He shrugged, "A usual phrase to welcome someone. Was the travel convenient?" Though he knew that his mom would have a hundred complaints, it was his duty to ask about her well-being.
Rati huffed her queries, "No, idiot! Private jets are convenient. I gave you a private space inside my womb for ten months. Can't you hire me a jet?"
"It's a two-hour trip, Mom!" Sooraj gave up on his words. "Millions of people travel by economy class. You came by a business class ticket."
"Sandwiched between a guy who leaned on my shoulder and a teenage bitch with a putrid perfume," she retorted, pressing her forehead. "I have a terrible headache now!"
Vikram interrupted the old lady, "Even if we had hired a spaceship, you would have complaints." When she returned a nasty stare, he turned his eyes to the ceiling.
Rati scowled at Sooraj, "This is why condoms exist."
Niyati walked to her grand mom to give a hug and welcome her but Rati pushed her behind, "Can't you seek my blessings?"
"Why not?" Niyati bowed at the feet of her grandmother to touch her feet. Rati pressed her down, "Use your spine to bow correctly! You are a lass, not a grand mom."
Niyati grunted in pain and stretched herself straight.
Rati turned to Vikram, "Do you need an invitation to come here?"
He waved his hands, knowing her trap, "I already have enough blessings."
Rati eyed Sooraj in displeasure and walked further inside, "What are you doing here?" She questioned Krish. He turned to Vikram.
Rati eyed the guys and announced, "I have heard enough," and marched towards Madhu and Praneet. "You are being trapped for that useless fellow. Hmm..."

Madhu couldn't suppose anything from her words. The marriage already gave her anxiety and the old woman worsened it ten folds. Rati understood her stress and comforted the young woman, "I mock my family a lot. You need not worry, lass."

Madhu nodded her head and bent in front of the old woman to seek her blessing. Rati patted her head with pride, "You are humble. Flap your wings like a butterfly and fly high like a falcon."

"She can walk like other humans," said Vikram who was pissed by the buttering words of Madhu. "Can we already go shopping?"

"Looks like you are keen for this wedding..." Rati smirked at her grandson. Vikram thought to himself that his wedding should happen after her funeral.
************

Praneet suggested a posh shop in Bangalore to purchase the outfits. Madhu didn't fancy the traditional dresses that were showcased in front of her but the other women were eager to select her wedding outfit.

While Rati and Niyati suggested a lehenga, Ankitha and Revathy suggested a saree. Madhu scowled at the pricking artwork on the dresses. She didn't prefer the uncomfortable dresses though they were apt for her wedding.

After all, it was a legal contract between her and Vikram, not a wedding to celebrate as their families wished.

"I think she wants something else," Rati commented after a thorough check on Madhu. The younger woman was astounded at her comments and agreed, "I don't want to be a conventional bride as this wedding is also something out of the box."

Rati frowned her eyes and crossed her hands, "This has to happen no matter if it is normal or absurd."

Vikram interrupted his grand mom, "She isn't complaining about this wedding. Let her speak."

Madhu eyed the grandson and grand mom duo and said, "I want a coat suit for the wedding."

"What?" Her mother, Revathy gawked at her. "It has to be traditional, Madhu. Either saree or lehenga and nothing in between."

Madhu leaned behind the chair, "I am marrying as per your wishes. I will present myself the way I want to."

Niyati sided with Madhu, "That's a unique idea. I will buy a gown too."

Krish fakely celebrated, "Yay! Vikram's wedding is gonna be fun!"

Vikram rolled his eyes, "Then we both can be in suits. Something different I must say." Though he was surprised by her choice of attire, he thought that was enough for their fake wedding. They excused themselves from the crowd to choose the dress of their deal.

"You could have opted for a gown like a woman," Vikram said to her with a venomous face.
Madhu retorted back, "Keep your sexist remarks inside your mouth if I don't want to punch your face," and walked fastly towards the dress section.

Rati ordered the rest of them to finish the shopping spree in an hour. Niyati shrieked in wonder and ran towards the gown section while Ankitha stormed to the saree section.

Krish blinked at the chaotic ladies, "Madhav, I need a dhoti. Can you help?"

Madhav bobbed his head, "I will get myself a sherwani now. Everyone except the bride and groom will look grand at the wedding."

Krish couldn't agree less.

Niyati checked herself in a green gown and eyed Ankitha for judging. She scowled at the gown, "You could do better," and showed her blue saree. Niyati nodded negatively and snorted. The girls were clueless about their outfits.
********

"How do we look, chicks?" Krish extended his hands in the air in his silk dhoti and Madhav adjusted the buttons of his sherwani.

"Wow!" Ankitha wondered about their dresses. "Is it your wedding or Vikram's?"

Madhav shrugged, "They both don't know how to live but it's the only wedding of my only sister. I will be a handsome best man." The guys were happy with their outfits.

"Help us," Niyati shrugged at them. "We have hundreds of choices but aren't satisfied by one dress."

"Women are like that," said Krish and walked near a rack. "I think yellow suits Ankitha and lavender is Niyati's colour. Why don't you guys select something in those colours?"

Ankitha nodded, "If you say so..." She turned to Niyati, "I will search with Madhav and you take the help of Krish."

The guys eyed each other helplessly.

Niyati found a lavender gown and twirled. Krish gave her a thumbs up, "Found!"

Madhav and Ankitha walked together. She beamed in a yellow saree and thanked Krish for the idea. Madhav whispered in her ears, "Hottie, it's tailored for you." He loved her curves in that saree.

Krish batted his eyelashes, "Both the beauties are god's gift. Go and pack these."
********

"I told you I wanted the blue one," Madhu bickered Vikram, holding a red suit. "Don't you have the patience?" She loved to check different clothes before buying one but Vikram pestered her to be quick.

Vikram snorted like a donkey, "Why can't you shop swiftly? Every woman takes a day to choose a hideous outfit and you are no different."

"Could you shut up? Your black suit fits for a funeral, not a wedding," scowled Madhu. "I don't know about other women but I need to be two hundred percent confident about the dress."

"You look ugly in every dress," Vikram interrupted her. "Even if you wear pajamas, it won't matter."

Madhu rolled her eyes and showed her red suit to others.

"Okay," said Niyati hesitantly. "Why coat suit? You can wear something ethnic..."

"I need to be unique," Madhu replied. Though she hated the wedding, it allowed her to buy a formal suit. 

Vikram selected his outfit without a glance just like the legal document recklessly selected him for the wedding. He would be glad if they signed the documents that day itself without any pompous gala but they needed to wait for two more days for the wedding.