Summary: Don't leave that on the beach; It's considered littering-

A/N: I've always wanted to do Mermay, but have never really gotten around to writing an actual Leviathantale story- So, here's bootleg Mermay, I guess?

The coastal breeze from beyond the ocean waters of Ebott City never failed to make Dream's eye sockets sting due to the saltiness. (Or, perhaps, it was annoyance at this point.) Nevertheless, he persisted in his mission.

According to reports, Nightmare and his gang had been seen "casing" the beachside area for "evil deeds." While the Guardian of Positivity carried doubts about the proclaimed meaning of the dark lord's visit, he continued to talk to the local Mettaton and gain an account of his brother's "nefarious" activities in the AU- which sounded more and more unimpressive as the conversation went on.

"It was horrible!" The robotic monster gasped, dramatically holding a hand to his awkwardly square chest. "He was sitting there - menacingly - while those hellkites that follow him splashed around in the water, no doubt tormenting the poor fish!"

"I... see. Terrifying." If Mettaton noticed the bland note in Dream's voice, he didn't comment on it and merely continued on a tirade about the dark lord's order from the local confectionary stand. Who would have guessed his brother liked mint chocolate chip ice cream? Interesting-ish information. However, that knowledge would have been easier to glean without all the extra (unnecessary) details.

The only evil here, the yellow-clad skeleton noted, is his ability to stretch what should have been a five-minute conversation and overexaggerate for hours on end.

With a sigh, he scribbled fake words in his notebook to sate the monster's desire for attention.

Speaking of monsters aiming for his attention, Ink took that moment to return from whatever he'd ditched Dream to do and screamed from the shore, "Dream! Look! Look over here! I promise it's important this time!"

"What is it, Ink?" The guardian groused, warily turning toward the noisy artist. "Can't you see I'm- Uh..."

Dream's words stuttered to a halt as he observed his friend, who sported a notable attachment covering his legs: a large, scaly sea creature.

"I'm a mermaid!" Ink declared, showing off the beast.

"Ink, why is there a fish on your legs?!"

"That doesn't matter- Now, tell me I'm pretty!"

Dream's mind took that moment to process the fact that the creature's sharp teeth were sinking into the other's bones.

"OH MY STARS! IT'S TRYING TO EAT YOU!" He shrieked and chucked his notebook at Mettaton before rushing down the sandy hills to the waters, hands hovering uncertainly in front of the artist. "Hold on, I'll-"

The soulless skeleton gripped the front of his shirt, pulling the yellow-clad guardian closer to his ominous, empty eye sockets. "Tell me I'm pretty."

"Er-"