Forgiving people isn't always about giving them a second chance,
Sometimes it's about closure,
About giving yourself the chance,
To move on.

.\.|./.

Crystal Monroe

| in which she confesses murder |

Sirens blare all around us, following the deathly silence that followed the crack of the bullet against flesh.

Jeremy lands on the ground with a loud thud, and I exhale a shuddering breath, unable to believe what I have just done.

Holy shit,  just shot my ex-boyfriend.

Talk about extreme psycho ex-girlfriends.

He's not dead, thank heavens. He's not dead because the bullet only hit his leg. But he is writhing in pain, crying aloud as he lays on the ground clutching his leg.

Like Ryan was just minutes ago.

The only difference is that there's blood pooling all around Jeremy.

Aside from the fact that I just shot him and might be going to jail soon.

Ryan is next to me in moments, as police cars zoom into our vision. Before I know what he's doing, Ryan has slipped the gun out of my hands and wiped it quickly against his pants. I watch with wide eyes, too dumb-founded and mentally blank to make sense of anything, as he clutches the gun between his own fingers.

"Ryan --" I begin breathlessly.

His lips silence me, and I close my eyes, letting his taste flood my brain and numb it.

"Don't move!" The officers appearing out of the cars command, pointing their guns at us. "Hands where I can see them."

I don't move, opening my eyes a fraction to see Ryan putting up his hands. He pulls back an inch, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Put your weapon on the ground and step back," the officer commands.

I stare, unable to do anything but stare at everything unfolding before my eyes. As for Ryan, he opens his hand to show the officers the gun before dropping it to the ground. He takes a step back, his eyes never leaving mine.

'Say nothing,' they instruct.

Ryan's gaze remains on me and mine on his, as officers march towards him, taking him by force and cuffing his hands behind his back. Medics are already attending to Jeremy, hoisting him onto a gurney and loading it into an ambulance, as Ryan is shoved into the backseat of a police car and the door slammed shut.

And I watch, being the cause of everything and yet invisible.

"Wait!" I cry out as the police cars begin to roll out. "Wait, stop!"

Nobody hears me, nobody but an officer who is ushering me into the back of his car. Another takes the keys from me before walking away, but I see nothing else.

I sit at the station. rocking back and forth and struggling not to confess the crime I committed. I shot Jeremy, not Ryan who is locked inside the interrogation room or perhaps even behind bars. I haven't seen him since he was pushed into the back of a police car, and after two hours of being told to sit still and remain silent, I'm beginning to lose my mind.

"Where's Ryan?" I keep asking everyone I see. "Please, let me see him. He didn't do anything. He was only trying to protect me."

Everyone ignores me, and I pace around the empty space until an officer tells me to sit down and stay out of his way.

I don't know what to think, so close to breaking down. The LA heat and starvation don't bother me anymore, not even the fact that Jeremy might lose his leg because of me. But if Ryan gets convicted for a crime I committed, I don't know how I'll ever live with it.

Unable to take it anymore, I decide to tell the truth. Maybe if I tell them I shot Jeremy, they will take me instead and let Ryan go. They might ask me a hundred questions and sue me for attempted murder and assault, but perhaps they'll let me see Ryan before they throw me in jail or hang me from the noose. I don't know how things work in LA, but even convicts get a final wish. I'll use mine to tell Ryan I'm sorry.

And that I love him.

I do, whether I admit it or not. I'm afraid of admitting it, scared of losing him. Jeremy always said I mess up everything I do. He said I was cursed, destroying everything I touched and ruining everyone I loved. Thinking of all Ryan has been through because of me, I have to admit that Jeremy was right.

From the moment Ryan entered my life, he's been in pain. We met in a tragic accident, and ever since then, I have caused him nothing but pain. His life could have been okay, perfectly fine in Alaska without me causing it to come apart. He spent his time in Alaska trying to help me, selling his bike and home to save me, coming back to the place that destroyed him just to make me happy. Even now, he's going through questioning and interrogation because of me.

"Crystal Monroe?" an officer calls.

I jump to my feet, running over to the counter.

Nobody has spoken to me in two hours and all my own attempts to get some answers have been squashed. I'm desperate to see Ryan, though, so even if they ask me to confess to a dozen murders, I'll do it.

"He's here," the officer says, and I don't even ask him who he's talking about.

I don't need to, because I see Ryan walking towards me, his hands hanging at his sides and free of any cuffs. The blood from his head has dried upon his skin, and he's limping on his bad leg. Apart from that, he seems okay and calm.

He smiles when he sees me, and I throw my arms around him as soon as he steps through the glass doors towards me.

I'm sobbing into his shoulder and he's holding me close when the officer next to him clears his throat.

"Your car's around back," the man says, his eyes on Ryan as he hands him the keys to our car.

"Thanks," Ryan answers the officer. "I hope you'll keep me updated about Jeremy."

The officer nods, his green eyes watching us as I glance from him to Ryan. Ryan looks completely at ease, but the set jaw tells me I should keep my mouth shut until we're out of here. It's strange how easily we can read each other now because I can tell something's wrong even if I don't know what is.

Ryan takes my hand, not giving me a chance to ask any questions. He leads me out of the station, nodding towards some of the people he passes. Apparently, they know him on grounds different than the ones I predicted.

"What's going --" I begin as soon as we're out on the road.

I don't get to finish because Ryan's lips are on mine. He tastes like coffee, and I take it in, intoxicated less by the caffeine on his tongue and more by him alone.

The officers gave Ryan coffee?

"Damn, you're badass," Ryan comments when he pulls back, a smile playing along his lips.

"What?" I ask dumbly, blinking in confusion. Ryan's kiss has the magic to wipe my mind blank and leave my mouth hanging open as my heart craves more of him each time.

Ryan's grey eyes sparkle. "You freaking shot him, Crystal. Do you know how hot that was?"

I half-snort, half-whimper. "I know how fucking stupid that was," I correct him. "I'm sorry about what --"

"Are you kidding me, Crystal?" Ryan laughs. "Jeremy's in the hospital. He's injured and going to be summoned to court as soon as he's better. Officer Warren, he's got all of it under control. Assault, abuse, possession of an unregistered weapon ... your ex has got more charges on him than he can fight now. You did this, Crystal. You finally won. You and no one else."

I stare at him, taken aback not only by the way Ryan phrases everything but also by the sheer happiness on his face. I haven't seen him this happy since we left Alaska, or actually since Jeremy came back into my life. This is the Ryan who drove his bike through the traffic with me hanging on for dear life. This is the Ryan who told me he wanted to kiss me. This is the Ryan who did kiss me, out on the street and in the pouring rain.

This is the Ryan I fell in love with.

He kisses me again, and this time I don't know how to feel. I know he says I'm the one who did it, but that's a lie. Ryan did it. He saved me when I didn't even want to be saved. He gave up everything he loved for me, faced his demons and jumped back into the fire he took years to crawl out of. He did it all for me, even taking the blame for shooting Jeremy when he was afraid I was in trouble.

Ryan might not be God, but he is my guardian angel on Earth.

"He's not getting out any time soon," Ryan adds, stopping next to the car. "And we are not staying here any longer."

He holds out the keys of the car and I take them, knowing his leg is badly hurt.

"We should go to the hospital," I suggest, getting into the car and revving the engine to life.

My heart is still beating too fast, and everything seems too good to be real. I keep feeling like there has to be more to this, like we're leaving one battlefield only to step onto another. I feel it even before Ryan speaks, confirming my fears.

"No." Ryan shakes his head. "But there is one more place I'd like to go before we leave."

I turn to look at him, seeing a mixture of resolution and uncertainty clouding his gaze. He looks like he wants to do this and yet he doesn't, like he's afraid of what he wants. It's the way I used to feel every time I looked at Ryan when I was still kind-of Jeremy's girlfriend. I wanted Ryan so badly and yet knew I shouldn't. Whatever Ryan wants now has him trapped in a similar fashion.

"I want to see mom," he says.

His eyes meet mine, and I know. I know this is something he needs to do.

Something we need to do.

.\.|./.

A/N: Do you think Ryan should do this? What are the worst-case scenarios running in your heads?

As for the surprise ... I have decided to write a sequel to Fall.

It's simple really, the reason being that a) I don't want to let go of Ryan and Crystal this soon (yes, I'm clingy), and b) because I really want to expand on the impact of child sexual abuse on the victim's later life. This story was more about closure and how Ryan tried to cope with what was going on around him. Long-term effects were ignored, but I really want to bring them to light. Also, if you want to see how Ryan's past can effect his relationship with Crystal and his chances of happiness, I think you'll love the next part. Imparting awareness in a light-hearted and a not-so-dark way is what I plan to do -- not to mention a whole bunch of cute Ryan+Crystal romance -- and I hope you guys stick around for ... 'Rise'.

And yes, I will be making the needed changes to this cover now to make it match the changed name and aesthetic. I'm considering Mending Crystals to go with Mendings Falls but you guys let me know if that sounds okay. I might not even have a separate book and continue it after this one so that we can have both books in one.