CHAPTER FORTY ONE|| ALEXANDRIA

Alex picked at the skin around her nail as she sat beside Eli in one of the cars Aaron had brought to take the group back to his community. She sat in the middle, wedged between Aaron and Eli while Glenn and Rick sat in the front. the air that surrounded the car was consumed with tension as they'd agreed to head toward Aaron's community. 

Alex stayed silent throughout the drive, her eyes occasionally meeting Eli's as his hand patted her knee pulling her from her thoughts, knowing her well enough to know not to let her thoughts take over while they headed toward possible danger. Alex was pulled from her thoughts again, this time not by  Eli's reassurances but by a soft clanging coming from the passenger seat as Rick investigated the glove box. 

Peering over the passenger seat as well As her uncle's shoulder, Alex saw the dozen number plates in his hand: Texas, Wisconsin. Each plate rick pulled from under another had a different state. Alex's eyebrows furrowed as she turned to look at the man sat beside her as he quickly went to defend himself: "I'm trying to collect all 50 states. put them all on a wall in my house."

"Jesus Christ" Alex sighed, god the man really did talk too much. Pinching the bridge  of her nose she Diverted her gaze back to Eli, whose brows were also furrowed at the man's statement:  "You have your own house?"

"Mm. See for yourself." Aaron nodded toward the bag that laid on the floor by Eli and Alex's feet. His response to Eli's question made the blonde man reach for the envelope of photos sticking out of the bag. Alex watched as her best friend pulled the photos from the envelop, flicking through them left the pair in shock.

Houses. Walls. A real community. Alex's eyes met Eli's wide ones as the blonde took a double take at the photos. the hope and positivity that flowed through Eli's veins showing once again as a smile tugged at his lips. Yet Alex wasn't convinced. Anxiety spiralled through her stomach more violently than it ever had in the face of danger. Because this time it wasn't just danger, it was danger she was walking her family into...

"don't get your hopes up Lee" Alex sighed resting a hand on Eli's forearm causing the man's eyes to meet hers once again. But he shook his head, the thing was; Eli wasn't stupid, Alex knew that. But Eli Moore was one of the most level-headed, sweetest people Alex had ever met. He, Aswell was Glenn were the type of people that made the world a better place by just being in it. And well that came with The unwavering Kindness and soul innocence that Alex found unnerving. 

"If you give up on hope there's nothing left to fight for Lex. We need to have hope."Eli's words rang through Alex's mind as she glanced back down to the photos in Eli's hand, and her mind couldn't help but wonder as her eyes found Glenn who drove the car down Route 16. Glenn, the hope of a future with him was what had kept her going. So maybe she wasn't as cold-hearted as she thought. 

But As Alex's eyes found the photos again her heart stopped. Like a flick of a switch anxiety flooded her stomach in seconds as she took the photos from Eli's hands flickering through them once again. No one. Not a single person in any photo: "Rick? did you ask him the questions?" 

"No" Rick muttered barely turning his head toward his niece, The tension in the air grew thicker with every breath that was taken as Alex's eyes found Aarons a sense of dread trickling its way through Alex's bones. She needed to know, They needed to know. so she asked her voice stern as ever: "How many walkers have you killed?"

"I'm sorry what?" Aaron stared blankly at Alex, the look of confusion on his face only growing with every second that passed while alex waited for an answer. a proper answer. the tone of his voice changing again as he answered: "I don't know, a lot"

"How many people?" Alex continued watching his face only grow more contorted with confusion at the question, a mix of disgrace newly found upon his features. As not only  Alex but everyone else in the car waited for an answer.

"Two" Aaron answered, his eye contact with alex faltering, she could feel the shame that radiated from him at his own answer causing her hardened features to soften. He wasn't lying, or at least in her mind, he wasn't. but that didn't ease her suspicion so she asked the next question: "Why?"

"because they tried to kill me" Aaron answered, Correctly. An answer that was enough to lower everyone's suspicions at least enough to continue the journey to his community. But Alex still wasn't convinced. She didn't want, Glenn, Josh, Carl or Judith anywhere near danger. She didn't want anyone in danger. 

"You were listening to us?!" Rick's stern voice echoed causing Alex's head to shoot toward her uncle as he held up a listening device. the sight almost sucking all the air from Alex's lungs as the anxiety grew stronger, Aaron's pathetic excuses of defending himself barely audible over Rick's yelling. 

"they could've heard our plan. This isn't safe!" Rick exclaimed his stern voice echoing through the car As all eyes laid on Aaron aside from Glenn's who remained on the road ahead. Alex's anxiety violently rushing through her veins at the thought of her family in danger before a panicked yell Invaded her ears. 

"shit!" Glenn yelled. Alex's heart pounded against her chest as she turned just in time to see a walker violently collide with the windshield splattering its blood across the glass and obscuring Glenn's view of the road. 

"Glenn!" Rick Yelled bracing himself as Glenn Slammed his foot against the Gas, Both Alex And Eli almost being thrown from their seats as Glenn pressed his foot down on the gas sending the car rushing forward into more walkers. Blood splattered against the windshield as more walkers collided with the car. 

"They were right behind us! they wouldn't hit us, I can get us out" Glenn's panicked yells filled Alex's ears as she braced herself. Adrenaline rushing through her veins as she focused her wide eyes on Glenn. Her heart jumping to her throat with every clash of a walker's body that hit the car. 

The snarl of walkers surrounded the car followed by the crushing of bodies that followed as Glenn pressed his foot down against the Gas, Alex's shoulders wedged between the two men beside her as all the noise faded blurred into the sound of pulsing blood that thumped aggressively against Alex's ear drums.

The scent of burnt rubber invaded Alex's nostrils as the car swerved, The screeching tyres flooded the group with Anxiety. Alex was flung forward as the car came to a stop. The group Gasped for Air as Alex's eyes almost instantly Searched for Glenn. Her heart heavily beating against her chest as if trying to escape the confines of her ribcage. 

"Josh, Carl" Alex gasped as her head shot behind them, Glancing through the bloodied back window to see nothing... Glenn and Rick rushed out of the Car in search of The rest of the group while, Eli piled out followed by a frantic Alex. 

"I don't see them!" Rick yelled, His stern voice more frantic As Alex's wide eyes searched the darkness for any sign of the rest of her family. Her chest constricted with panic as she frantically looked around running a hand through her hair.

Glenn Climbed onto the bonnet of the car, Staring out into the darkness he searched for the other car and searched for the rest of his family. but nothing; "No, They're gone. They got away"

"Alright, We'll circle back and find them Let's Go!" Rick ordered Ushering everyone back to the car. Yet alex was frozen. Stuck staring into the dark abyss, Searching for her family. Her mind ran wild. Her Mom, Her Dad, Her Brother, Lori... her body was on fire again. She was burning. what she felt when she lost Glenn and Rick at the prison. That same scolding feeling, that felt as if red hot ashes flooded her lungs with every breath. That feeling was back. Josh, Juidth and Carl. gone.

"Lex! Lex we gotta go!" Eli exclaimed, Handa falling against Alex's shoulders pulling her from the imploding memories flooding her mind. She shook her head as Eli put out the raging fire in her chest. Her mind flagged with anxiety as she rushed toward the car escaping Eli's grasp before she could take a breath.

*****

Walking, Running, Walkers. Alex's lungs heaved, While her chest ached with longing for her family. Her eyes flickered between Rick, Eli and Glenn almost checking they were still beside her. still with her. Flashes of loneliness, Flashes of those months she'd spent alone at the start plagued her mind. Nausea rushed through her stomach as she thought of her boys and Judith. 

Each step triggered a pain through her heart, Each second she spent wondering if they were okay caused her breath to catch in her throat. so distracted by her thoughts Glenn's voice wasn't audible over the violent pounding of her heart.

'Alex, we'll find them" Glenn nodded almost trying to reassure both Alex and himself,  His hand falling to the small of her back fully pulling her from her thoughts. Looking up at him she met his soft brown eyes almost falling into the sense of security they gave her. 

'we have to" Alex nodded, she had to find them. Carl, he had to be okay. Her promise to Lori still stood. Guilt rolled in as she thought of Carl, How little she'd spoken to him in recent days. She'd been so distracted. She'd started taking family for granted again, And oh how much that terrified her. 

Alex's eyes returned to the darkness ahead, shadows dancing against the floor Like the shadows of Alex's past that followed her around every corner. Rick walked ahead, eyes peeled for any sign of Daryl and the rest of the group. Just as Alex began to let her thoughts drown out reality she saw a shadowy figure, Her heart jumped to her throat in an instant as she saw the figure raise his hand. 

Then Carl's Voice; "Dad!" He exclaimed rushing toward the group, Alex's heart exploding with relief as she and Rick rushed toward the long-haired boy. The three Grimes, Enveloping each other within each other's arms in seconds. An almost sob-like sound escaping Alex's lips as she clung to her cousin for dear life. Her heart racing with emotion. 

"Jelly bean" She sighed breaking the hug with her cousin and uncle meeting the blue eyes of carls, that matched both her own and Rick's, the smile tugging at her lips one that hadn't been seen in a while. Rick's relief caused him to bring his son in for another hug. Alex's eyes wandered further back falling on a sight that warmed her heart. 

"God I'm glad you're okay" Glenn smiled Pulling Josh into a hug, The young boy's smile resembled Glenn's as Alex rushed toward them almost body-slamming Glenn to join the hug. One arm instantly wrapping around her husband while the other clung to Josh as if she was afraid he'd disappear, Eli and Maggie's Hug resembled theirs. The couple gripped each other like a lifeline. A tear forming in Eli's eyes from hiding the paralysing worry he'd felt for Maggie while they'd been separated.

*****

"Everyone, Excuse me. Excuse me" Aaron's shaky voice echoed through the small building The reunited group had taken shelter in for the rest of the night. Eric, Aaron's injured boyfriend having been saved by Maggie and the rest of the group left Aaron with an unruly sense of debt. 

"Thank you. All of you..." All Eyes fell on Aaron as he spoke. All eyes but Sam's. Sam's eyes remained focused on the dark-haired brunette who stood beside Glenn from across the room. The woman he considered to be his best friend. The woman who'd barely even greeted him since they'd been reunited, An ache growing in his heart every time he watched her with Glenn. 

"You saved Eric. I owe you. and I will make sure that debt is paid in full when we get back to my community... when we get back to Alexandria" Eyebrows raised throughout the group at his words, Alexandria...

****

A\N - i completely forgot this episode existed i was expecting to be in Alexandria by now, But writers block is coming with the end of season 5 i am shitting it for what i have planned... 

I hope you all enjoy (this isn't proofread)