ГГ doing things for yourself should not feel wrong, but deceiving others for yourself, in most cases, should. ГГ - me 2021

Tom was in the bathroom, his mind scanning for any answer but the one he already knew.

'I actually forgive him. I still like him..'

Tom pounded a fist on the bathroom sink and got up to look at himself in the mirror. He had knowingly kissed Tord, despite the robot and the destruction of their lives. Despite all of this he still enjoys Tord's jokes, his subtle pokes at Tom's habits. The types of interactions Tom had with Tord, he knew he would never have with anyone else. They had something only they could have.

Tom realized what he'd just done to Tord and rushed back into the room, flushed.

Tom stood at the doorway of his bathroom and stared at Tord, who sat on Tom's bed, with good hand over his mouth. Tord's face was scrunched, he hadn't even noticed Tom was staring.

"Tord." Tom carefully said, as Tord slow turned to look Tom in the eyes. "I think I've realized that I like you." Tord's eyes widened and slowly, he shook his head.

"No." Tord managed, as Tom shook his head right back.

"Despite what you've done Tord-"

"Tom, you can't." Tord's voice rasped and his face turned angry. "You can't!"

"Why not!" Tom was angry now, it was already hard enough to come to terms with this on his own. The pill was already hard to swallow. "WHY NOT." Tords face contorted and without thought he raised both arms and slammed them down,

"YOU. JUST. CAN'T." A searing, aching feeling raced throughout Tord's arm. Scorching its way to every working nerve ending. Tord was in agony, but only let out a animalistic grunt.

Of course in the heat of the interaction, nobody could hear the front door opening as a spare key was used. Or the footsteps approaching the room.

Tom ruggedly knelt on the bed and put his arms on Tord's shoulders. "WHY CAN'T I? YOU DON'T THINK I DESURVE IT?? YOU DON'T THINK I'M DISGUSTED TOO?"

Tord's face went from anger to discomfort, as Tom's words pierced him. He knew he wasn't welcome still, but a part of him was still strikingly hurt by Tom's intentions, and idea of 'love'.

"You can't love me..because I love you. And I don't desurve a second chance. You can't just have me, we have to agree we're both worth the pain."

Tom loosened his grip and looked into Tord's eyes, 'oh fuck' was all Tom could think as he realized the position he was putting Tord in. The position he was putting himself in.

The door slams open

"What, the FUCK is he doing here?"