The rest of the day didn't go any better either.

Here I was sitting alone watching the sharks swim around all by myself.

No one could bother to come and find me.

After some of the comments Logan's parents had made today, I just couldn't take it anymore. I needed to get away from them and this seemed like the only way to do it. The sharks continued to swim in the large tank in front of me not knowing that people were crowding the glass to watch them in their beauty. Mazie was excited about the giraffes but this was what really got me excited. Sharks were always my favorite animal. I had plenty of stuffed sharks growing up.

They just kept moving, no matter what they couldn't stop. If a shark stopped they would sink to the bottom of the tank and die. That was kind of like how it was in a military relationship. If you don't keep moving, keep pushing forward through another day you will die. This life will kill you. That doesn't even include the danger that Logan is in every single time he leaves our house. This life isn't for the weak, but as I sit here looking at these sharks that's all I feel.

Weak.

What a silly four letter word. Alone it's an insult, one that young kids would spew at a playground and continue on about their day. As you get older though that word gets more harsh. It's one of the only ones that does that. Words like bitch lose all meaning the more you hear them, but weak, that word never goes away. When someone calls you weak that's exactly how you feel.

So when Logan's mother had the audacity to call me weak for standing up for my children I just couldn't take it anymore. I can only imagine what they are saying about me now.

I bet they couldn't be happier that I was gone, sitting here, in this building filled with blue lights, alone. Feeling like the weakest person on the planet. Especially since I just ran away. I couldn't make any comments back. Logan would have been so upset with me if I had opened my mouth and tried to defend myself. But the more I let her walk all over me like that, the more I am just the true definition of weak.

I wondered what animals they were looking at now. Were my kids having fun? Was my husband having fun? I was sitting here alone, missing out on all this time I could be having with them.

Maybe Logan started yelling at them as soon as I left. Did I really stay long enough to give him a chance to handle the situation? Why wouldn't he ever handle it for me? Why was I always the one that had to just deal with it and he acted like it wasn't ever happening? Did he know it was happening?

I could feel the hot tears forming in the corners of my eyes. They threatened to fall with every question.

Even so, the shark just continued swimming.

My eyes latched onto one of the larger ones, watching as she twirled her way through the water so smoothly, so gracefully, and everything just seemed to get out of her way. Nothing was going to stop her. Nothing was going to hold her back.

Why couldn't I be more like that?

What kind of example was I setting for my children?

For Mazie specifically. She needed to know that she was tough, and could stand up against anyone and anything. She needed to know she was just like the shark swimming around the tank. But I hadn't shown her that today through my actions, or any other time we've spent with Logan's parents.

That was just one more thing that made me feel weak. Was I a good enough role model for my daughter to look up to? My son had an amazing man to call his father, and even though he didn't stand up for me either, I have to realize this puts him in a hard spot as well.

These people raised Logan, and they view him as the light of their eyes. You would think that same feeling would be passed on to whoever he married. If someone was good enough for him, then why couldn't I be good enough for them? I would never be good enough for their boy though, and the longer we are married, the worse they seem to get.

Another family caught my attention. They had a small girl about the same age as my children. She had dark hair that was pulled back tightly into a perfect ponytail. The woman I assumed was her mother had one to match. She bent down to get on the same level as her child, wrapping her arm around her legs to hoist her up into the air. The little girl's eyes lit up with amazement as the shark swims shockingly close to where they were standing. She points, calling out in excitement. The man that was with them wrapped his arms around both his wife and kid, pulling them in close to him. The whole family just stood there for a while, comforting each other and experiencing that special moment together. That's what I should be doing with my kids.

The tears slipped from my eyes, finally sliding down my cheeks. I was so angry. I was so upset that I couldn't enjoy these moments because of Logan's parents. Where the hell was my family? I'd never been able to enjoy these moments between deployments and underways. It seemed like the military always needed Logan for something. Whether it was last minute and he had to leave dinner early to head back into the 'office' or he was gone for months, we never fully got him back.

Here I was sitting alone and now watching a family that seemingly had everything I've ever wanted my family to be. When that little girl's dad left for work in the morning, he didn't have to tell her bye for months. Odds are he didn't even tell her bye.

He didn't have to think about all the things he was going to miss if he didn't come home that night. His life was probably so easy. People don't realize that they could get into a car accident every single day. We mindlessly go about things because they are so normal that we forget how fragile life really is. Military spouses and their families don't have that luxury. Our husbands leave for months on end and we don't get to talk to them. We don't know if they are dead somewhere and the formal notification hasn't reached us yet. Every single day when Logan steps out that door, I'm terrified I won't see him for months, or worse ever again. Being a military spouse teaches you that you can't take any moment for granted.

But what was I doing?

I was sitting here alone, in a room with a bunch of swimming fish.

This was one of those very moments that I was forgetting what was important. I was allowing Logan's mother to take away something special from me. Something that I may never have a chance to be a part of again. Something that very easily could be taken away from me tomorrow.

I wiped the tears away, quickly gathering my things. I needed to go find my family.

My feet leave loud echoes as I skip down the stairs. A fire was lit under my ass and it was go time. No matter what Logan's mother said to me, or how they felt about me would stop me from having a wonderful day with my family.

"Hey, where are you going, hotshot?" A familiar voice shouts, arms wrapping around just as I hit the last step. My heart skips in my chest. Looking down at me were the most beautiful blue eyes I had ever seen. Logan had really found me.

"How did you know where I would be?" My voice was practically a stutter at this point. My emotions ran rapidly through my body. I was still so angry at him that he hadn't defended me, but I loved this man so much for being here at this very moment, exactly when I needed him most.

He points at the tank, turning our attention back to the sharks.

The other family had left, and everyone else had cleared out as well, leaving Logan and me alone in the blue hazy light.

"Why did you run off like that? You had me worried sick about you." His face crinkled in a way I couldn't describe. He looked more panicked than I think he was trying to lead on. His comment took me back. Did he really not know why I ran away? The way I had blown up in a huffing storm before just leaving, saying nothing to anyone, should have made it pretty obvious something had happened.

"Your mother has been making these comments all day, and I just had had enough of them." I felt small again. Why did she have so much power in our relationship? I wanted to respect her and give her the benefit of the doubt all because she was his mother, but she hadn't done anything to deserve it from me.

"What comments are you talking about? I hadn't heard her say anything to you hardly all day." Now he just looked confused but, I'm sure the look on my face was even more puzzled.

"Logan, this is part of the problem. Your mother is so damn rude to me and you never seem to notice. I'm not sure if you just don't give a shit about what's going on with me or what, but I can't understand how you can be so oblivious to this problem. Especially when it's been happening for years, and I've told you about it countless times. At this point, I'm starting to think you just don't care and mommy knows best." The anger was back, and no longer just directed at his mother. How could he be so naive?

I was waiting for his mother to come barreling into the room now, just to get upset with me about how I was taking away precious time with her son. This was always the issue we had when we came back here. They never saw him enough, and I needed to not be so selfish.

"Whoa, what did she say? I know we have talked about this before and I promised you I would pay attention and try to listen better, but I truly haven't heard anything all day." He pulled his arms away from me, and honestly, I had forgotten they were there.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Now that my hands were free, I was able to throw them in the air.

"Ari, please calm down. We need to get heading back. They are waiting for us. My brother and his wife will be at the house in a few hours for dinner tonight, and we need to get things ready for them to come."

"Yes because the only thing that matters is if your mother is happy right? That's why you want us to go? Because god forbid she has to wait just a few more minutes than she would like to. You didn't catch the comment this morning about us being late? What about the one she said when we were standing in line before they went to sit down? You were standing right next to me when she said it. Oh, and don't forget the best one today, when she called me weak for asking if we could stay and look at the giraffes for just a little bit longer. I'm the mom and I shouldn't let my kids walk all over me, they will learn that I'm spineless. Huh? Did you hear those ones or were you too busy with your head up your ass?"