I HAVE ONLY READ UP TO THE SIGHT SO IF SHE CHANGED THE NAMES I WILL NOT KNOW IT SO DONT GET MAD AT ME!!!
Anything that I say will be bold and in italics
Just a note: Anything I say is not supposed to be bullying/mean to the author. I know we all had our own bumps. It's just that I've had my own reactions to other books and decided to share this one with you!

ALLIANCES
ok so like i said this iks my first story be nice plz

btw its set afte rsunset so
Be nice? Why should we be nice when you don't have correct grammar or spelling? Lol it's afte rsunset. Double check your sentences why don't you.

ThunderClan

Leader: Firestar - ginger tom with a flame-colored pelt
Ok so I see we are sticking with the same Thunderclan

Deputy: Brambleclaw - dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes

Medicine Cat: JayFeather-gray tom

Warriors:

Squirrelflight - dark ginger she-cat with green eyes

Apprentice, Foxpaw

Dustpelt - dark brown tabby tom

Sandstorm - pale ginger she-ca
Author: I've decided to not go back and fix my mistakes I'll just leave everyone wondering why I forgot the t

Cloudtail - long-haired white tom

Apprentice DaisyPaw - cream long-furred cat from the horseplace
When did Daisy become a apprentice? She is older than some of the warriors

Brackenfur - golden brown tabby tom

Sorreltail - tortoiseshell-and-white she-cat with amber eyes

Thornclaw - golden brown tabby tom

Brightheart - white she-cat with ginger patches

Spiderleg - long-limbed black tom with brown underbelly and amber eyes

Whitewing - white she-cat with green eyes

Apprentice, Icepaw

Birchfall - light brown tabby tom

Graystripe - long-haired gray tom

Berrynose - cream-colored tom

Hazeltail - small gray-and-white she-cat

Mousewhisker - gray-and-white tom

Cinderheart - gray tabby she-cat

Poppyfrost - tortoiseshell she-cat

Honeyfern- light brown tabby she-cat

Lionblaze - golden tabby tom

Hollyleaf - black she-cat

FoxHeart-reddish tabby tom

IceFire-white she cat

ToadRibbit-black—and-white tom
Did she make up this name? Because are you kidding me! That's awful!!!

RoseFlame-dark cream she cat

BriarStorm-dark brown she cat

BumbleFlower-very pale gray tom with black stipes

BlossomWind-pale brown she cat iwth a dark stripe along her spine
Hate Bumbleflower and Blossomwind. What was she thinking

Apprentices:

Fox DaisyPaw - cream long-furred cat from the horseplace
Fox Daisypaw... Yup

FlamePaw-firecolored she cat with one grnee eye one blue eye

LakePaw-bright blue gray she cat with blue eyes

The last 2 r starKits siters
Siters? So they babysit Starkit. USE CORRECT GRAMMAR AND SPELLING

JazzPaw-red she cat with blue eyes and a black tail
No just no! You don't see the cats rocking out to Jazz music!

Queens:

Ferncloud - pale gray (with darker flecks) she-cat with green eyes mother of Dustpelts kits

Dawnsparkle-bright tortishell she cat with garguntan blue eye's mother of Jayfeathers' ktis, formaly of Shadowclan
1. Jayfeather is a medicine cat
2. Dawnsparkle is a awful name
3. Yes Thunderclan is generous when letting cats in. But they ain't just gonna let a SHADOWCLAN cat in.

Kits:

StarKit-graysh-blue-and purple she cat with molting orange eyes and a white star on her forhaed
Ahh so this is our main character! And I... Hate her. SHE IS A MARY SUE!!! Blue and purple!!! No cat is purple or even blue!!! At the most they are a blueish grey!!! And a white star on her forehead!!! Awful 0/10

Elders:

Longtail - pale tabby tom with dark black stripes, retired early due to failing sight

Mousefur - small dusky brown she-cat

Weaslepelt-big red tabby he cat with bight yellow eyes (hes Rowanclaw's dad, he came to Thunderclan when Dawn- did0
Dido is this almost over. I'm crying at how funny this is

LeafPool-brown tabby she cat
When did Leafpool become a elder?

ShadowClan

Leader: Blackstar - large white tom with huge jet-black paws

Deputy: Russetfur - dark ginger she-cat

Medicine Cat: Littlecloud - very small tabby tom

Apprentice, Flamepaw (ginger tom)

Warriors:

Oakfur - small brown tom

Apprentice, Tigerpaw (dark brown tabby tom)

Rowanclaw - ginger tom

Smokefoot - black tom

Apprentice, Owlpaw (light brown tabby tom)

Ivytail - black, white and tortoiseshell she-cat

Apprentice, Dawnpaw (cream-furred she-cat)

Toadfoot - dark brown tom

Crowfrost - black-and-white tom

Apprentice, Olivepaw (tortoiseshell she-cat)
How do cats know what a olive is?

Kinkfur - tabby she-cat, with long fur that sticks out at all angles

Ratscar - brown tom with long scar across his back

Apprentice, Shrewpaw (gray she-cat with black feet)

Snaketail - dark brown tabby tom with striped tail

Apprentice, Scorchpaw (dark gray tom)

Whitewater - white she-cat with long fur, blind in one eye

Apprentice, Redpaw (mottled brown and ginger tom)

Tawnypelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes

Flamewind- flame color tabby tom with green eye's

Tigerclaw-huge dark brown tabby tom with long claw's and amber eys
No he is dead. He did not come back to seek revenge.

DawnFeather-cream tabby she cat (shes a different cant then the one in tC ok?)
Ugg

OlivePaw-bright brown she cat
Another olive

Queens:

Snowbird - pure white she-cat

Elders:

Cedarheart - dark gray tom

Tallpoppy - long-legged light brown she-cat

WindClan

Leader: Onestar - brown tabby tom

Deputy: Ashfoot - gray she-cat

Medicine Cat: Barkface - short-tailed brown tom

Apprentice, Kestrelpaw (mottled gray tom)

Warriors:

Tornear - tabby tom

Crowfeather - dark gray tom

Owlwhisker - light brown tabby tom

Whitetail - small white she-cat

Nightcloud - black she-cat

Gorsetail - very pale gray-and-white cat with blue eyes

Weaselfur - ginger tom with white paws

Harespring - brown-and-white tom

Leaftail - dark tabby tom, amber eyes

Apprentice, Thistlepaw (long-haired white tom)

Dewspots - spotted gray she-cat

Apprentice, Sedgepaw (light brown tabby she-cat)

Willowclaw - gray she-cat

Apprentice, Swallowpaw (dark gray she-cat)

Antpelt - brown tom with one black ear

Emberfoot - gray tom with two dark paws

Apprentice, Sunpaw (tortoiseshell she-cat with large white mark on her forehead)

Heathertail - light brown tabby she-cat with blue eyes

Breezepelt - black tom with amber eyes

Elders:

Morningflower - very old tortoiseshell queen

Webfoot - dark gray tabby tom
Nothing much to say pretty decent

RiverClan

Leader: Leopardstar - unusually spotted golden tabby she-cat

Deputy: Mistyfoot - gray she-cat with blue eyes

Medicine Cat: Mothwing - dappled golden she-cat

Apprentice, Willowshine (gray tabby she-cat)

Warriors:

Blackclaw - smoky-black tom

Voletooth - small brown tabby tom

Apprentice, Minnowpaw (dark gray she-cat)

Reedwhisker - black tom

Mosspelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with blue eyes

Apprentice, Pebblepaw (mottled gray tom)

Beechfur - light brown tom

Rippletail - dark gray tabby tom

Apprentice, Mallowpaw (light brown tabby tom)

Graymist - pale gray tabby

Dawnflower - pale gray she-cat

Dapplenose - mottled gray she-cat

Pouncetail - ginger-and-white tom

Mintfur - light gray tabby tom

Apprentice, Nettlepaw (dark brown tabby tom)

Otterheart - dark brown she-cat

Apprentice, Sneezepaw (gray-and-white tom)
Does he sneeze a lot?

Pinefur - very short-haired tabby she-cat

Apprentice, Robinpaw (tortoiseshell-and-white tom)

Rainstorm - mottled gray-blue tom

Duskfur - brown tabby she-cat

Apprentice, Copperpaw (dark ginger she-cat)

Queens:

Icewing - white cat with green eyes, mother of Beetlekit, Pricklekit, Petalkit, and Grasskit

Elders:

Heavystep - thickset tabby tom

Swallowtail - dark tabby she-cat

Stonestream - gray tom
Same as Windclan pretty decent

For this page I give it a 5/10 grammar could use some work, and some of those names HAVE to be fixed (including Tigerclaw) and I don't like the inconsistency of how she put the description. Some were in parentheses and some weren't.