meanstreak
rick grimes 𝘹 fem!𝘰𝘤
© WANDARYEN ──── 2024

"Lori," I exhaled slowly, quickly making my way towards her as I held my hands out, "let's lay you down."

Lori shook her head, placing her hands on a metal bar as her head hung low, her breathing quicker than before. "No, the babys coming now."

"We have to go back," Carl started to panic. "We have to go back to our cell block to have Hershel help!"

I looked over at Carl and shook my head. "We can't risk getting caught out there," I then turned to Lori, "you're gonna need to give birth to this baby here."

Lori stated to pant heavily, making Carl grow more nervous and scared for his mother. "What is she doing, cant she breathe?"

I nodded, "She's fine. Come here, let's get your pants off." I reached in front of Lori, unbuttoning her pants then helping as I started to pull them down her waist while she held onto my shoulder.

As Lori laid down on the cold floor with my help, I looked up at Carl as he stood by and watched. "You're gonna need to help deliver your baby brother or sister, I'll need your help."

Carl looked over at me nervously, "do you know how?"

I swallowed hard, looking from Carl to Lori. "My Dad taught me a few things, but it's my first time." I placed my hands on Lori's knees, taking a deep breath. "I need to see if you've dilated."

Lori nodded her head and I shifted back, leaning my head down with furrowed eyebrows. But the room was too dark to even see, causing the frustration and anxious feeling to grow more inside me. "I cant tell."

She begins to pant as she leaned back on her hands, no longer able to hold back anymore. "Sienna, I gotta push. I have to push."

I nodded my head and helped Lori to her feet, her back facing me as I watched her grab onto the poles in front of her. I placed myself in a position to help with Lori's pushing and being able to hold the baby when it comes.

I looked up at Lori before placing a shaky hand on Lori's back, rubbing it soothingly. "You're doing great, Lori. Just keep doing it. Your body knows what to do — let it do all the work." I noticed her nod her head before she became frozen, pushing once more and letting out a horrid scream.

I flinched at her sudden scream, feeling something wet coat my fingers that were held beneath Lori. I pulled my hand back and noticed the few drops of blood sliding down my palm. My face grew pale and it was like a mixture of cold and hot water was dumped on my body, fear sliding straight down my spine.

"Lori, stop! Don't push, something's wrong." I quickly wiped my hand on my jeans and stood up, gently taking Lori's arms and helping her lay back down on the ground.

Carl quickly kneeled down beside his mother, taking her hand in his own. "Mom? Mom, look at me, look at me, keep your eyes open!" I reached up with my hand and used the back of it to wipe under my nose, then brushing sweat from my forehead. "I have to get you back to my dad."

Lori breathed heavily, shaking her head as her face covered in sweat and her eyelids weighed too heavy to keep open. "I won't make it."

I shook her head frantically, "Lori, with all this blood — I don't even think you're fully dilated yet, no amount of pushing is gonna help." I released a shaky breath and gestures towards her legs. "He'll know what to do, we're not prepared for this. You could—"

"I know what it means," Lori sighed tiredly. "I'm not losing my baby. You've gotta cut me open."

I felt my stomach fall completely as I swallowed the lump down my throat, sitting back on my heels as I shook my head. "No — no, I can't."

"You don't have a choice." Lori sighed.

"Ill go for help," Carl spoke as he went to stand up but Lori quickly grabbed her sons wrist to stop him.

I looked down at Lori, "Look, Carol's the one that practiced that, my father only taught me the steps Lori, if I—"

She looked at me with pleading eyes, something I've never seen her done before. "Please Sienna—," I shook my head once more. "I have no anesthetic, no equipment—," Lori held her stomach as she locked eyes with me. "Carl has a knife."

I looked over at Carl as he was vision was focused on his mother. My eyes filled with tears, the weight of pressure folding down on my shoulders. We were in a room full of generators and supplies, a very dark room far away from help.

Carl was right beside me, clutching onto his mother's hand for dear life. When I looked back down at Lori, a tear slipped down my cheek and my bottom lip began to quiver. With no medicine, and no preparation; I knew Lori wasn't going to make it. She didn't stand a chance.

"But — you'll die," I whispered, tears silently rolling down my cheeks.

"My baby has to survive—please..." her breathing began to get heavy again. "My baby, for all of us, for Rick please." My eyebrows furrowed at Ricks name, my head tilting down. "Sienna! Please, please. See my old C-section scar?" She lifted up her shirt above her belly, another tear falling from my eyes as I nodded my head, taking notice of the scar across her stomach.

"I cant do this," I whispered again, my body slowly beginning to shake. I felt too inexperienced and too guilty for having to be the one to cut Lori open. I would be taking her life away right in front of her sons eyes.

"You can. You have to." She breathed heavily then reached for her son, grabbing his hand and squeezing his tightly as she turned her head to look at him. "Carl? Baby, I don't want you to be scared, okay? This is what I want. This is right. Now you—you take care of your daddy for me, all right? And your little brother or sister, you take care—"

I looked over at Carl as warm tears were running down his pale cheeks. "You don't have to do this."

"You're gonna be fine," she continued, "you are gonna beat this world, I know you will. You are smart, and you are strong, and you are so brave! And I love you." Carl let out a sob as he fell into his mothers arms, hugging her tightly as her arms wrapped around his back. "You gotta do what's right, baby. You promise me, you'll always do what's right. It's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world. So don't—, so if it feels wrong, don't do it, all right? If it feels easy don't do it. Don't let the world spoil you. You're so good!" I reached up and used the back of my hand to wipe the tears streaming down my cheeks but more and more kept coming. "You're my sweet boy! The best thing I ever did! I love you! I love you. You're my sweet, sweet boy, I love you. Okay?" Carl nodded, pulling away from his mother as Lori now looked at me.

"Sienna when this is over, you're gonna have to do it—, it can't be Rick." Lori then took a deep breath to calm herself down as I nodded my head.

I went to take Carls knife that was waiting for me on the ground until Lori grabbed my arm and pulled me close to her. My heart was beating against my chest as Lori whispered in my ear, her grasp on my arm tight until she slowly released it, letting me sit back on my heels. My mouth gaped open from her words, my mind running a mile a minute until I slowly looked away towards Carl's knife.

I swallowed thickly and took the knife in my hand as Lori kissed the top of her son's hand. "Goodnight, love." Lori breathed, focusing her eyes on the ceiling as I clutched the knife in my hand.

"Im sorry, im so sorry," I cried out before bringing the knife to the scar and cutting it open as Lori begins to scream out in pain. Warm tears spilled down my cheeks as blood seeped through her wound, her cries of pain slowly coming to a halt as I dropped the knife to the side and quickly reached into her stomach to grab the baby. I noticed Lori's head fall back to the ground, falling to the side as her eyes fluttered closed. A small sob escaped my lips as I managed to scoop the baby up into my arms.

"Carl, give me your hands." I whispered.

He did as I asked, holding out his hands as I gently cradled the baby in my arms; but there wasn't a sound to be made. No movement, and not a single cry. The air got caught in my throat as I quickly started tapping at the babies back, more tears blueing my vision.

My bloody fingers repeatedly tapped the babies back before tapping her chest. When her small eyes opened and a soft cry fell from her lips, Carl and I seemed to let out the same sigh we didn't know we were holding in.

Carl looked down at his knife, picking it up and gesturing towards the cord that was still attached to the baby. I looked at Carl, slowly nodding my head as he cut the cord with ease to detach her from Lori.

He pulled off his jacket and helped me wrap the baby in warmth, my arms instinctively rocking her gently to keep her calm.

"We have to go." I whispered, slowly standing to my feet as Carl stood up as well, only to hold out his arm and stop me. "We cant just leave her here, she'll turn."

I swallowed hard, reaching for the gun in my waist before Carl protested my actions. "No," he spoke softly before pulling out his own gun. Tears were silently running down his cheeks, "I have to be the one to do this." I looked at Carl, seeing the pain in his eyes; understanding his reasons before slowly nodding and turning away.

I started walking towards the door, reaching for the handle when a bullet was released from the chamber and echoed through the room. My chest tightened as Carl came up behind me with a straighten face, opening the door and being the first to walk out as I slowly followed in silence.

When we made it out of the cell block, stepping out into the brighten sunlight, my eyes squinted for a moment until they could get used to the brightness.

Everyone was outside in the basketball court, standing around watching Carl and I make our way down the steps. The baby let our small whimpers from my arms, my grasp on her slightly tightening to protect her from any danger that could still be around.

Rick turned to face us, his eyes falling on me; noticing the baby in my arms until he looked at his son, seeing the lifeless reactions coming from his boy.

His eyebrows furrowed with worry as he made his way towards us, slightly tilting his head to the side. "Where—where is she?"

My bottom lip began to quiver as I looked at him with tear filled eyes.

His face was beginning to grow pale, his hands placed on his hips before he started walking towards the cell. But I quickly grabbed his arm with one of my hands to stop him. "Rick! Wait—, no. Don't." A small sob escaped my lips as I stepped backwards, Rick quickly turning around with red eyes.

"No," he spoke, slowly shaking his head. "No, no." He looked over at his son, placing his hands on his knees as he hunched forward.

Carl didn't utter a word, his eyes focused on the pavement as Maggie and Glenn came rushing towards me.

"No, no, no!" Rick began to cry out, shaking his head quickly as he stood up straight.

Maggie kissed the top of my head, placing a hand on my cheek as Glenn rubbed my back knowingly. My mouth gaped open, no words beginning able to spill anymore as I began to cry.

But my crying wasn't a match against Ricks as he fell to the ground, covering his face with his hands, letting out a loud cry. "No, no!"