meanstreak
rick grimes 𝘹 fem!𝘰𝘤
© WANDARYEN ──── 2024

My eyes fluttered open and my surroundings were entirely different compared to home. Rick sat beside me with his body hunched over, sleeping against the bed with his hand tightly holding mine. I had to force my hand from his grasp to stretch my fingers out — each bone cracking in the process from remaining in the same position for too long.

"Rick?" I managed to get my voice back and suddenly I was visibly aware of everything. I remembered what happened with Maria — two men carrying me around and talking about my survival. I remember hearing the gun fire after Rick and Daryl came for me.

He tiredly raised his head off the bedding and rubbed his eyes, shaking himself out of sleep until he turned to me. His shoulders straightened and his body shifted in the chair when he noticed I was awake.

"Hey, hey," he reached for my hand again and began repeatedly kissing the top of it. "You're okay — you're okay." A statement he repeated multiple times to himself rather than me.

"Where are we?" I tried to take a glimpse around the room but a large curtain blocked my path of getting a better visual of our surroundings.

He continued to kiss my hand before scooting the chair closer to the bed, dragging one hand through his hair in the process. "We're at the Kingdom, in their infirmary. Do you — do you remember anything?"

"All of it," I mumbled softly with my gaze fixated on the curtain. "Where's Daryl? The others?"

"T-There's a lot that happened. Most of us are okay, but the Kingdom lost a lot of their people. I had to bring you back here to see their doctor." I finally turned my attention to Rick as he spoke. "Daryl's fine, Maggie's fine — but the fight isn't over yet, not even close."

The door to the infirmary opened behind the curtain and we both turned our heads in the direction of footsteps entering the room. "Dr. Dana," Rick greeted once the curtain was pulled back and an older woman pulled up a stool beside me.

"I'm glad to see you're awake," She adjusted the glasses on her nose and reached for the clipboard on a small table. "You've been in and out for two days." I watched as she flipped through the paperwork on the clipboard, briefly reading over several lines before focusing her gaze on me. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired — numb."

She nodded. "The medicine is working. We got you hooked up to an I.V. for hydration and we stitched up your leg — fixed your nose." Dr. Dana placed the clipboard down and reached into her pocket for a small flashlight. "Your cuts are still healing but, there's progress moving along here." She clicked the light on and inspected my face before checking my pupils. "You suffered a minor concussion which is why you were slipping in and out of consciousness so much."

Rick continued holding onto my hand but used his other to rub his face with a heavy exhale through his nose. "Tell her."

I furrowed my eyebrows, briefly looking at Rick. "What? Tell me what?" I looked back towards the doctor and her gaze was fixated on the clipboard with a single nod. "We need to talk about the baby."

I instinctively reached for my stomach with tears forming quickly. "What? Is it okay? Is it alive?"

Dr. Dana nodded swiftly. "Yes, it is. But Sienna," she placed the clipboard down on the table beside her and folded her hands together. "The amount of stress and abuse you've endured this entire pregnancy has caused a lot of concern for the baby. I'm afraid that — if you encounter one more life threatening situation, your child won't make it."

My entire body visibly recoiled into the bed and I couldn't control the rush of tears streaming down my face. I held onto my stomach tighter, turning to Rick with a choked sob curling up my throat. "I want to go home, I don't want to be here anymore — I just want to go home!"

He abruptly stood up from the chair and sat on the edge of the bed, purposely positioning himself closer to me. "I know, I know — It's going to be okay."

"Sienna," Dr. Dana tried speaking up over my cries while I anxiously tried pulling out the IV from my hand. "No, don't do that! Calm down, you're going to be okay — " she tried reaching for me but I sank further into the bed straying from her touch. "No! I want to go home! Please!" She tried to continue comforting me over Rick, their voices meshing together like chaos until he waved his arm across the woman to put distance between us.

"Stop it! Whatever you're doing, just stop it!" The vein in his forehead returned and he didn't give the woman a chance to respond when he turned back to me.

I couldn't hear his words over the continuous sobbing but I didn't have the strength to stop myself. I only cried harder when he leaned forward to embrace me in his arms with his head falling on top of mine.

The woman disappeared and all I could hear now was Rick murmuring things into my hair. Reassurance and soft hushes like he was comforting Judith.

"We're gonna go home. You'll see Carl and the baby — I promise." His lips brushed against my forehead and I was forced to inhale a shaky breath to control my scattered breathing. "You're safe with me," he lowered his gaze towards mine and used his thumbs to brush away the fresh tears. "I'm gonna get you home, no matter what."

"But then you'll leave again," I whispered tiredly, clenching my teeth tightly to refrain from crying. "It's not over."

He carefully placed his hand over my stomach, "you're right, it's not over — which is why I have to go back out there and continue the fight." I lowered my gaze down towards where his hand hovered over my stomach while using my own to wipe under my nose. "This doesn't end until Negan is dead — until they're all dead or surrendering — whatever it takes. But I have to be on the front lines with the others to make sure that happens."

I nodded knowingly and leaned my face against his arm that was propped up near my head. "I don't know how much more I can handle this," I admitted.

He leaned forward and kissed the top of my head. "Remember when we took the prison? We traveled day and night seeking solace. We made it to the yard but we had to make one more push to get inside the walls." I nodded my head again silently. "One more push. Just one more and it was ours. That's what we have to do here, we have to keep fighting just a little bit longer until it's over. And it will be over."

Silence formed between us and I focused my gaze on the patterns on his shirt with my head still resting against his arm. There was no way I could fight anymore — not on the front lines, not even on the back lines and that probably pained me the most.

"I did some things at the compound," he admitted softly to me. "Things I wouldn't normally be proud of but decisions I made to get you out of there." I shifted my head to rest back against the pillows and he cradled my cheek with his hand. His thumb softly stroked my cheek bone. "Two young guys that brought you there — I killed them. I almost let them go, part of me was willing to set them free but then I saw you. I saw the state you were in and suddenly all I could see was red. I wanted to kill all of them."

"Daryl carried you out the rest of the way and I just — unleashed everything in me." He slowly sat backwards on the bed and I lifted my gaze to meet his own but he was focused on everything but me. "I beat a guy to death. For a split second someone tried to shoot at Daryl and he almost dropped you. You were in so much pain. I still can't get the sounds out of my head — every time you moved you would cry. And I wanted them to hurt, all of them."

My eyebrows nervously twitched together as I stared at the side of his face. "No one was saved?" He shook his head silently.

The door to the infirmary opened and Dr. Dana made a return while wheeling in a large ultrasound machine. "I have an idea, something you both need." A small smile stretched across her lips as she pushed the object closer to us. "Something that'll make you both feel a little happier."

We watched her sit back in the stool beside the bed after plugging up the ultrasound. Rick carefully moved off the bed and sat back down in the chair on the other side of me.

Dr. Dana moved the blanket back and lifted the hospital shirt above my stomach. "It's a little cold," she mentioned before applying a blue gel type of liquid over my skin. "Would you both like to know the gender?" She turned to us, one hand holding the scanner and her smile stretcher further.

I briefly looked at Rick who smiled in my direction while giving an encouraging nod. "Sure," I spoke softly while turning back to the monitor.

"Okay." She moved the gel with the scanner across my stomach and the monitor switched from a black screen to a grey picture. Almost as if someone pulled the curtain of a window back and we were greeted immediately by a small figure.

The heartbeat echoed throughout the room and my own nearly stomached when I noticed the small body displayed on the monitor.

"So, this is the head," she nodded towards the screen. "We have some arms and legs, which is a very good sign." I felt Rick reach for my hand and I squeezed it within my own for comfort while holding my breath. "And it looks like we have a baby girl growing in here."

I exhaled immediately and Rick's laughter traveled through my ears. A fresh wave of tears, finally filled with joy, overcame me naturally. "It's a girl," I breathed out with a soft laugh.

"It's a girl," Rick repeated.

I turned to him immediately and grinned wide with tears rolling down my cheeks. "You owe me five dollars."

Dr. Dana laughed beside us while clicking a few buttons on the machine. "Did you both have a bet on the gender?"

Rick bowed his head with a soft chuckle. "No," he shook his head slowly before looking up at me again. "Just something that she does." I tried to fight back my smile from growing larger, not realizing Dr. Dana cleaned off my stomach and fixed my shirt in the process. She turned off the machine and reached over with a piece of film in her grasp. "Here, your first picture."

I took it gratefully and turned my body towards Rick, my cheeks beginning to grow numb but how big my smile was. "Look at her," I insisted happily while holding the photo between us. "She's real — she's really there." He laughed and nodded his head in agreement.

"It's a weird concept," Dr. Dana spoke up. "You go through all these emotions when you find out you're pregnant, then suddenly something starts growing inside you but it still doesn't quite stick until you see it on the ultrasound."

I turned to her while handing the photo to Rick. The moment it was in his grasp he was locked in, his eyes not pulling away from the photo. "I thought I might've been crazy. I didn't know how to feel at first, it didn't feel real."

"And that's entirely normal.That's why you spend the nine months getting to know this tiny human being — it's like making a best friend." She pushed the machine backwards after unplugging it from the wall. "I know more than anything you want to go home, Sienna." I nodded eagerly and she smiled. "So I spoke with one of my nurses and she's going to come back to Alexandria with you both. I can spare a hand — I was informed you didn't have a doctor and I don't want you to make the trips back here. You need to rest. Not a suggestion but an order."

"I will," I promised.

"My nurse, Lily Maxwell, she's fantastic. Her husband Calvin will be coming with her for an extra hand during the birthing process. But they will be bringing their own equipment — medicine, anything you need for the process." She folded her hands on her lap and offered me another smile. "They're working on it as we speak but give them a few hours to pack and you'll be ready to head home. You are now and their care — you can trust them." Her last words were directed towards Rick and he finally glanced up with a few stray tears dropping down his face. "I have several nurses here that help but I'm sending you both home with the best. If there's anything life threatening then either I will come to you or you will come to me, but no matter what — you take care of yourself so this baby comes out healthy."

"Thank you." I immediately reached out for the woman with my hand. She accepted it with a nod, giving me a reassuring squeeze before standing up. "You both are going to be good parents."

Rick nodded beside me, "yeah, we are."