Chapter 16

It was almost 9:32 and in exactly 3 minutes, the Gauntlet of Grace choir would mount the alter. We were rehearsing our latest ministration, the song was called 'Oceans' by Hillsongs. I'd fallen in love with the song the moment I first listened to it, Annie as I liked to call her was the one who first gave me and after a few weeks I was sure we'd sing it in church. 

We were currently praying and my hands were locked with Oden and Jessica, both were new members of the choir and had amazing voices which I was totally jealous of, something I told them on a daily basis. And today, like almost every Sunday, Jessica and Oden would hold the best microphones whilst another of us would be randomly picked to be the third mic holder.

I was the third, and funny enough I wasn't freaking out. Let me tell you a little secret of mine, I was terribly afraid of performing in front of crowds or pretty much any amount of people, not even my parents, in short, I had stage fright.

But maybe it was the spiritual courage flowing through me that made me be like this, I didn't know, I was just happy that my fingers weren't shaking again. "In Jesus' most powerful name we have prayed."

My hands dropped to my sides as Oden and Jessi let go and I let out a small breath, it's show time. Dami, the general secretary gave us a small signal minutes later, that testimony time was over and that we were up.

I followed behind everyone else as we walked down the small path way, leading to the alter. Once we all got up, Jessi took hold of the mic. "Can somebody praise the lord." A few people yelled 'hallelujah'. Jessi shook her head and frowned, "We are in the holy house of God today and so with us rising to our feet, can somebody PRAISE THE LORD GOD!"

The whole building stood up, well except a few lazy teens but it was still amazing, Jess had a talent for getting a rile out of people, it was something I'd always dreamt of doing but never accomplished. Everyone dropped back onto their seats seconds later.

"You call me out upon the waters, the great unknown, where feet may fail." I was mesmerized by the song and her voice at the same time, even though I'd heard both at rehearsals the day before. "And there I find you in the mystery, in oceans deep, my faith will stand." I smiled lightly at the beautiful silence of the congregation.

"And I will call upon your name, And keep my eyes above the wave." The lyrics always seemed to touch me in this spiritual kind of way. "When oceans rise, my soul would rest in your embrace. I am yours and You are mine."

As she went to the second verse, I found myself swaying along with the rest of the choir. I don't think it was just her voice moving, no, there was the holy spirit moving her. "So I will call upon your name," Oden joined in, singing in the Alto part whilst everyone else sang in their individual parts except lowly. It was more beautiful than we'd rehearsed. Yeah, it totally was the holy spirit.

"Spirit lead me where my trust is without boarders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me." This was my favourite part of the 8 minute song. "Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander, the presence of my savior." I was basically lip syncing it with her. While only Oden lightly sang along side her.

That's when I realized, I hadn't sang a peep through out the whole song. Like the idiot I was, I jumped into the song. I had gotten in on the wrong key and it was very obvious, as the song was starting to fumble. Oden and Ifeoma gave me random looks as I kept on singing, I couldn't stop.

People were staring at me with questioning looks and some had disgust but I just couldn't stop. Even Jessi noticed and tried to sing along side me but then I forgot the lyrics and started making up my own. "Take me closer to the king of all the other and make me yours my father, the one who takes me farther."

My voice took up a mind of its own,making its own words jumble out of my mouth. Annie had widened her eyes beside me when I turned to her and with lighting fast reflexes, she ripped the mic from my grip and joined Jessi and Oden as they tried to pick up what was left of the fallen song.

Quickly wrapping up the song, the rest of the choir left the stage whilst Jessi and Annie were left with damage control as they broke into worship songs. I crashed onto my seat like a wrecking ball, breaking into quiet tears. My chest tightened and I shut my eyes in fear of feeling worse from the horrid stares I'm sure I'd be receiving.

It stated to become hard to breath, my chest started heaving faster and that's when the tears started falling. I tried my best to wipe my face quickly, this was totally embarrassing. Minutes later, I'd composed myself and I stopped the hiccuping.

I kept my head hung low and my eyes fixed on my book, writing down the first thing I heard from the lady preaching. It's a good thing we weren't in the adult church at the moment, I would die if i'd embarrassed my self in from of not only teens but adults and my dad.

Time seemed to fly quickly and before I knew it, the service was over. The moment we were done praying, I picked my bag from the seat and attempted to bolt out the door. Key word, attempted, except the one and only Jessi. "Kolupo wait!"

She screamed for no reason basically because she was standing right behind me while holding my hand. I spun around, avoiding eye contact with her at any cost. "I saw you crying, are you okay?" I nodded quickly, sniffling slightly. I hated to be asked if I was okay, it always made me feel worse.

I watched her from underneath my eyelashes as she nodded. Then out of the blues, Jessi pulled me into a hug. "It's normal to make mistakes, that happens to everyone." After subtly whispering into my ears, she let go of me and I gave a fake smile. "My dad has been calling, I should go." Waving my phone at her weakly, I made a beeline towards the door.

I didn't even think of the fact that I'd lied in the presence of the lord as I rushed to my dad's car in the church parking lot. The church was actually kind of big, the colors blue and cream decorated the walls as well as ribbons on the inside. Outside was a large sign with 'The Holy Temple' written on it.

The church's entrance had 4 pillars holding it up, each cream coloured, the doors were of glass and the floors of marbles. It was 2 storeys high, having a gallery that went half way across the inside of the church to stop at one end and start at the other, forming a semi circle shape facing the alter. It was marvelously built and designed by skilled architects if you ask me.

It took at least 40 minutes before I heard the sound of my father's car make that car beeping noise to unlock the doors. He had this bright smile on his face as he strolled towards the car. It seemed to irritate me further that my dad was not in the least bothered that he'd just made his daughter wait in the sun for more than half an hour.

I angrily got into the front seat and buckled up knowing the ride home took at most 30 minutes, so I adjusted the seat backwards and shut my eyes. I knew for sure if my dad saw my red eyes, he would ask what had happened and he would make sure I told him. So the whole ride I fauxed sleep and he seemed to have fallen for it.

##~~##

I stared intently at my ceiling, a million thoughts were running around in my little mind, each one stopping to shed a light on itself before rushing away. I couldn't sleep and I had school tomorrow. With a huff, I got off the bed and out the door.

Brushing my hands on the walls in the pathway, I paused at the not so hushed sniffling sound which dominated this part of the house. My dad's room was right beside me and the more I got closer, the louder the sound became.

Quietly placing my hand and ear against the cool wall which gave me shivers, I tuned in on what I was hearing. The sniffling became sobs in seconds and I too almost started crying. My dad was putting on a brave face at church today, like nothing was wrong. But everything was, he had lost his wife and she was his world.

My heart clenched tightly, I furiously tried to blink the tears away but they had a mind of their own and decided to coat my cheeks with its salty slick motion. Wow, I couldn't even stop tears from flowing and I wanted to bring my mother back.

Moving away from the door, I headed back to my room, my previous mission of going to drink tea already in the dump. I huffed as I flopped onto my bed, picking up my phone from the side. Maybe there was someone online to cheer me up.

Kenny Boss: Wifey 😘

I resisted the urge to hiss as I clicked on his message. Kenny was a person I was still trying to understand, he was weirdly funny sometimes and could be as serious to talk about politics, yes that serious.

Kolu Davis: So when did we get married?

He replied in less than half a minute, which indeed I was grateful for. I hated when people took their time to reply, it made me feel weird and sometimes I'd wait the exact amount of time they took to reply me before I reply them back. Yes, I'd gone that far.

Kenny Boss: Ahn.. so u don't want me anymore 😪

This boy was a character indeed, he always found a way to make me smile, even if it was just a little. Giving a little eye roll at my screen, I figured playing along wouldn't be so bad.

Kolu Davis: Okay, I'm sorry.

Kenny Boss: I knew u loved me, sha, I'm hot so i'm nt shocked.

This time I actually started laughing, though it was silent. My hand wrapped around my lips as I composed myself. He was literally crazy.

Kenny Boss has changed your name to Wifey😍😘😍

Kenny Boss has changed his name to Hubby😎😉💖

It's like he was purposefully trying to make me laugh, almost like he could feel I was sad. Kenny was the best, even though he still didn't want to tell me where I knew him from.

Wifey😍😘😍: Kenny r u okay upstairs.

Hubby😎😉💖: Even if I was, u can't divorce me. It's in our arrngmnt.

Wifey😍😘😍:Lolz, agree what? Noooo, lets finalize this oo.

Hubby😎😉💖:Okay okay, tomao. We'll go to court, shebi that's what u want.

Hubby😎😉💖: Sweetie pie go 2 sleep, I know u hv school tomorrow.

A yawn miraculously escaped my lips out of the blue and I couldn't resist the urge to sleep anymore. Scary how a while ago, I couldn't sleep. I guess the stress from Dad's crying wore me out or was it Kenny?

Wifey😍😘😍: Okay, whatever. G'night.

I turned off my phone and dropped it to the side, the little vibration was a sure sign that he'd replied to me. I smiled lightly to myself. Thank the lord for the good friends I have, Thank God that there are still people out there who care about me and I pray that the lord with all his power, fix and perfect my life again. Then sleep snuck up behind me and dragged me into the darkness.