Dan: You make me so angry so fast, it's remarkable.

Stacy: I only said three words.

Dan: And here I am. Boiling with hate.

~~~

Lizzie: I made tea!

Stacy: I don't want tea.

Lizzie: It's not for you, this is my tea!

Stacy: Then why are you telling me?

Lizzie: It's a conversation starter!

Stacy: That's a lousy conversation starter.

Lizzie: Oh really? We're conversing, checkmate!

Stacy: . . . you're lucky I love you...

~~~

Dan: Look Stacy. Let's just say we're sorry on the count of three.

Dan: One,

Dan: Two,

Dan: Three

Stacy: . . .

Dan: . . .

Dan: See now I'm just disappointed in both of us.

~~~

Stacy: Alright! Listen up you little shits!

Stacy: Oh not you Stampy! You're an angel and we're glad you're here.

~~~

Lizzie: Rules are made to be followed. Nothing is meant to be broken.

Dan: Uh, pinatas?

Stacy: Karate boards!

Stampy: Spaghetti when you have a small pot...

Dan: And rules!

~~~

Dan: Don't worry, I have a permit.

Stacy: This says I can do whatever I want.

Dan: Exactly.

~~~

Dan walking in noticably late: Sorry guys I was... doing stuff!

Stacy running in a minute later: HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

~~~

Stampy: Stacy, will you stop fighting with Dan?

Stacy: No. Why would I want to stop?

Stampy: Okay, what if I said please?

Stacy: It would still be a no.

Stampy: Oh well I tried...

~~~

Lizzie: It's at times like this, when I'm caught between confessing my lesbian love to me best friend and breaking up with Dan I really wish I listened to what my mother told me when I was young.

Stampy: Why? What did she tell you?

Lizzie: I don't know. I didn't listen.

~~~

Stacy: Do you want to know how I broke my wrist?

Stampy: Yes!

Stacy: I was hula hooping. I take a class for both fitness and fun!

Stampy: Oh my goodness...

Stacy: I mastered all the moves! The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion... the oopsie doodle.

Stampy: Why are you telling me this?

Stacy: Because no one would ever believe you!

Stampy: Huh? You sick son of a bitch!

~~~

Stampy: Also from now on we will be using code names. You can call me "eagle one". Stacy, your code name is "been there done that". Dan is currently doing that. Lizzie is "it happened once in a dream". And... wait nevermind, Stacy. Your code name is... Eagle two.

Stacy: Oh thank God...

~~~

Lizzie: I turned out perfectly fine!

Stacy: This morning you thought a ghost made your toast.

Lizzie: I didn't put the bread in! You didn't put the bread in!

~~~

Lizzie: Dan, can we talk? One ten to another?

Dan: I'm an eleven but please continue.

Stacy muttering: Dan you're a fucking one, Lizzie is like... a million.

~~~

Stacy: And now for the message of hope!

Stampy: Ah the message of hope, right on time!

Stacy: Everything is garbage!

Stampy: Oh no...

~~~

Stacy: Oh. So suddenly don't have a death wish?

Dan: It's not that. It's just that I believe that I, personally, can even die.

~~~

Lizzie walks into a room: Hm. That's funny, I thought there would be big news.

Stampy: What would be big news?

Lizzie: Oh haven't you heard? It was to my understanding that everybody heard.

Stampy: Heard about what?

Dan: Stampy, no!

Lizzie: About the bird bird bird! Bird is the word, haven't you heard about the bird? Well Lizzie is gonna tell you about the bird!

~~~

Lizzie: You know, I thought someone with two wives would be a lot happier.

Dan: You're thinking of two knives.

Stacy holding two knives: I gotta tell ya' this is pretty terrific!

~~~

Lizzie: So I can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for ten minutes, or 4,000 degrees for one minute.

Stampy: Lizzie, no that's not how you bake cookies.

Lizzie: FLOOR IT?

Stampy: LIZZIE NO!

Lizzie: HOW ABOUT 4,000,000 DEGREES FOR ONE SECOND?!

Stampy: LIZZIE YOU ARE GOING TO BURN YOUR APARTMENT DOWN!

Lizzie: I'M GOING TO HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TI BAKE COOKIES!

Stampy: LIZZIE  P L E A S E!

~~~

Lizzie: Staaacy!

Stacy: What?

Lizzie: Want some Updog?

Stacy: What?

Lizzie: Updog?

Stacy: What's Updog?

Lizzie: Not much what's up with you!

Stacy: . . .

Stacy: You know sometimes I wish you would act like you're twenty five...

~~~

Stacy: Don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?

Dan: Not until four!

~~~

MudkipBrony: I'm gay and Stacy has stolen my heart... No seriously send help, there's blood everywhere.

Lizzie: I think I found your heart fam. But you'll have to take it out of her cold dead hands.

Stacy: *litteraly dead and has a heart in her hands*

~~~

Lizzie: Let's take a vote!

Dan: Secret vote, everybody close their eyes!

*Everyone closes their eyes*

Stacy: We wont know the results.

Stampy: Just say your vote out loud!

Stacy: We know each other's voices...

Stampy: Lizzie has a point!

Stacy: I DON'T EVEN Sound BRITISH!

~~~

Dan: What's rude is that you're still treating me like I'm seven!

Stacy: So what are you now? Eight?

Dan: I'm twenty six!

Stacy: Well you look eight.

~~~

Dan: Stampy is really fun to HANG around with!

Stacy: He and I were going to HANG out later!

Lizzie: Come on guys, put a NOOSE in it!

Stampy: *starts crying*

MudkipBrony: Just HANG in there Stampy!

~~~

Stampy: Did you just delete everyone else in one turn?

Stacy: Yeah? So?

Stampy: That's cheating!

Stacy: Screw the rules I have admin privileges!

~~~

Stacy: I did not hit Stampy it's bullshit! I did not hit him I did noooooooot! *Turns around* oh hey Daniel...

~~~

Stampy: Stacy! How did you get all these cuts on your arm! Oh my gosh it's like a knife cut you over and over again!

Stacy: . . .

Lizzie: Do you want to know why she has these cuts?

Stampy: Yes!

Lizzie: *points at Stampy* You, that's why.

~~~

Stampy: Shoot I lost Lizzie in this crowd!

Dan: Don't worry I got this. Oh look at all these comics lying around, it would be ashame if I dropped my lighter-

Lizzie: *appears from the crowd* It's called manga and don't you even dare!

~~~

Stacy: Galstaff, you have entered the door to the north. You are now by yourself in a dark room. The pungent stench of mildew emanates from the wet dungeon walls.

Lizzie in the other room: WHERE'S THE CHEETOS!?

Stacy: They're right next to you!

Stampy: I cast a spell!

Lizzie: WHERE'S THE MOUNTAIN DEW!?

Stacy: In the fridge! Duh!

Stampy: I want to cast a spell!

Lizzie: CAN I HAVE A MOUNTAIN DEW?

Stacy: Yes! You can have a Mountain Dew! Just go get it!

~~~

Stacy: The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

~~~

Stampy: Is there a word between angry and sad?

Stacy: Malcontented, disgruntled, miserable, desolated-

Dan: Smad.

~~~

Lizzie: Stacy don't you want to talk about how you feel?

Stacy: No, not really.

MudkipBrony: I do!

Stampy: We know Mudkip...

MudkipBrony: I'm secretly depressed!

Dan: We know Mudkip...

~~~

Dan: Hey Lizzy!

Lizzie: Actually it's spelled 'Lizzie'.

Dan: These are words we're saying with our mouths, what's the difference?

~~~

Lizzie crying: Love is dead and never existed. All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread.

Dan and Stacy giving the death glare at each other: What did you do to her?

Lizzie: Stampy stole my cookie!

Stacy: . . .

Dan: . . .

~~~

Stampy: Dan says I'm cute AF which I think means and fun!

Stacy: Aw. It doesn't.

~~~

Stacy: Hey Stampy, wanna buy some blades?

Stampy: No. Blades are for skating, ya dingus!

~~~

Lizzie: Whatcha got there Stacy?

Stacy: A knife!

Dan: Oh my god who gave her a knife?

~~~

Stampy: Would you two stop fighting?

Stacy: We're not fighting, we're having a creative discussion.

Dan: We are fighting!

Stacy: Creative discussion.

Dan: Fight!

Stacy: Discussion!

Dan: Fight!

Stacy: Discussion!

Lizzie: I can't believe you're having a fight about if you're having a fight!

~~~

Cassie: I did it because of love!

MudkipBrony: Cool motive! Still murder!

Dan: Get out of here Cassie! This is our turf!

Stacy: For once I agree.

~~~

Lizzie: You see what I do with fish is that I take... let's say a salmon.

Dan and Stampy: Okay!

Lizzie: So I take it and I put it in the frying pan with salad dressing and I just let it cool like that!

Stampy: Salad dressing?

Dan: What kind of dressing?

Lizzie: Whatever's there!

Dan: Do you use a thousand island dressing?

Lizzie: If it's there!

Stampy: Do you pour it over the fish and say, "Look it's like your back in the ocean!"

Dan and Stampy laugh.

Lizzie: So yeah that's how I cook fish.

~~~

MudkipBrony: Okay, so there are ten kids and seven chairs. What do you do?

Dan: Have everyone stand!

Lizzie: Bring three more chairs!

Stacy: The best seven of the lot can sit down!

Stampy: Bring in cake!

Cassie: Kill three!

Dan: . . .

Lizzie: . . .

Stacy: . . .

MudkipBrony: . . .

Stampy: OUT!

~~~
QUESTION TIME!!!

Question 1: Stacy why do you hate Dan so much?

Stacy: We're rivals in case you can't tell.

Dan: She may beat me at karate, but I have the better hair!

Stampy: This has been going on for awhile now...

Lizzie: It never ends...

Question 2: What did you guys do for Valentine's day?

Dan: Stampy and I played videogames all day. Making a special Valentine's day video for my YouTube channel.

Stampy: He was just going easy on me!

Lizzie: Stacy took the day off and we basically watched movies all day.

Dan: Ha! Lame!

Lizzie: Well she did make dinner, and she got us promise rings!

Dan: . . . Dang it!

Stampy: What are promise rings?

Dan: Something couples do. It's basically a promise that they'll get married some day.

Stacy: Yeah... *Puts her arm around Lizzie*

Stampy: Aw! I'm lucky I decided to wear this today! *Takes off his hoodie to reveal a shirt that says 'Lacy Trash' on it*

Lizzie: Oh my god

Question 3: Do any of your parents know?

Everyone: NO!

Dan: Let's keep it that way!

Stacy: I don't wanna get hit with the chancla!

Lizzie: I don't think my parents would care to be honest...

Stampy: I have straight sisters, I'll be fine.

Question 4: When is the next chapter of Philia and the Demigods coming out?

Stacy: What?

Dan: What's that?

Stampy: Some kind of book?

Lizzie: A blog maybe?

MudkipBrony: Soon alright? Just calm down! I have a science project due next week, an essay to get done. And a new kid to teach how to play the baritone to! Calm down alright?

LightTheDemon asks: Werewolf? Is the next chapter out?

MudkipBrony: I got sidetracked with this, so no not today. I have so many other stories you can check out though! Why bother me asking if the next chapter is done when I have a book about dragons, the Mafia, and YouTubers of the West Indies (which I made it's own book).

P.S: no he did not actually ask this.

Final Question: Where do you see yourselves in five years?

Stampy: That is tough...

Stacy: Five years huh?

Dan: I see myself having a successful YouTube channel and a healthy relationship with Stampy. I'll be very successful, I bet you!

Lizzie: I don't know where I see myself in five years. I just live in the moment you know? Sometimes I plan ahead but not really?

Stampy: I guess I'll say the same thing as Dan, the second part at least. I'm not much of a YouTube guy. Who knows, maybe I'll open a small bakery some day. It's always been my dream!

Stacy: And me? Well... if you asked me a few years ago where I saw myself in five years I wouldn't expect this. I was fine being single, and I was fine with my life. But things change and I realized that I was gay, for Lizzie no less. Who knows where I'll end up. We might stay together, we might not. We all might still be friends or we will stop talking to one another. But what I can say is this: I hope that in five years I'll become a writer and publish a book, and that I'll be with Lizzie for the rest of my life. Legally or by heart it doesn't matter to me, I'm just glad to have it.