I forced Carter to slow the hell down once we were driving to his place. I was still gathering my wits and figuring out how to deal with the shock of it all.

I had always been irrelevant. And somehow I liked it that way. But now, not only was I linked to Carter, I was linked to Carter picking me up and claiming me like a caveman.

I was scratching my head at the thought. Genuinely confused at how this all happened. How a pitcher of alcohol dumped on my head turned into countless orgasms, a soon to be famous boyfriend (maybe?) and me sitting in his car knowing I'm about to be fucked.

I cleared my throat after silence became the placeholder for his anger. Since I knew he wasn't mad at me but rather just mad in general, I just sat there stewing in my confusion.

Sure, maybe I should have been mad or maybe even scared, but deep down I knew Carter would never hurt me.

Besides, my idiot vagina kinda found his proprietary behavior attractive which was ahem, beyond me. 

When he unlocked the doors I hopped out teetering on my heels to catch up with his long strides.

"Slow down," I called out from behind him as we walked to his front stoop. Kinda sorta panting. When he turned to me I could tell that he wanted to grab me again, probably to speed up the process, but something about my expression kept him in check.

With visible effort he slowed down, holding the door open for me as I walked through.

As we waited for the elevator, I felt his eyes on me, sexual tension flooding the room.

A guy stepped off the lift. He stared at my tits. Carter stepped in front of me and seeing as this guy did not realize Carter was a man on the edge, I grabbed his hand and forced him through the door before anything else could happen.

When the doors shut I turned to him.

"You know, I find the fact that you want to protect me very sexy," I told him. "But you have to know I only want you. Random men don't mean anything to me."

I knew what was implied there but I didn't care at this point. Both of our cards were showing. Carter cared about me a lot more than I expected and I cared about him also more than I expected. So we were at a stalemate.

It was then Carter grabbed my hips and mounted me on the elevator handlebars. Kissing me roughly, strumming into my core. I bit his lip as a fire burned in my belly. He pressed into me deeper, harder almost grinding into me at this point.

I felt him everywhere but still it wasn't enough. I could never get enough.

When the elevator doors opened suddenly, we snapped back into place. Trying to be nonchalant. Probably failing.

An old woman was coming in as we came out and we didn't even spare her a glance.

We quietly walked the halls, before Carter bent to unlock his door.

He pushed it open for me and I gingerly walked through.

He turned to me to say something after the door clicked but honestly I didn't care and I wasn't listening. I attacked him, primed and wanting him badly.

Carter ignited with the same passion I carried. He pulled off my shirt, pulling my tits out of my bra, playing with my nipples. I stepped out of my skirt and my underwear as I kicked off my heels.

His shirt was on and I wanted to feel him, touch him and Carter obliged, in our frenzied out of control foreplay.

I made a noise in the the back of my throat and squeezed my legs together, the rush of wetness making me want even more.

His hands moved to my pussy and his teeth scraped the skin on my neck. He carried me to his room, where I crawled on to the bed.

I was forced onto my knees as he played with me, slowly. Toying with me. He liked doing that. I typically liked it too, even when I hated it. Now however, I just wanted it. I wanted him.

"Please," I moaned. "Carter, I want you."

Carter shut his eyes and groaned, obviously affected by my pleading. Yet he ignored me, seemingly adhering to his own agenda.

"Every man in that fucking party was finding something to stare at. Your legs, your tits, your face. Your ass," he said as he gripped me. "But these tits are going to be in my mouth. That tight pussy is going to work around my dick. And that pretty little face will have those eyes rolling back because of what I do to you."

I felt his words in my belly. The fire getting hotter as I cried out his name.

He spanked me, wetness flooding me, before turning me to face him. His arms were so tight and the way he pinned me down was so rough. I had to do what he wanted. I wanted to do what he wanted.

"Spread your legs," he commanded.

I opened them as wide as I could and when he pushed them open a little farther I let out a scream. He bent over me and buried his head beneath me, tongue kissing the hell out of my pussy. Nipping at my thighs and holding my hips to the bed as the sensations ricocheted.

He circled around me with his tongue, ignoring my shudders. Digging his fingers into my hips when I moved too much.

"Oh my God," I begged, my body vibrating as he brought me to the brink. "Carter please."

"I want to feel you come, feel that pussy tighten up on me," he spoke, lifting his head. "Everytime you come you make this face. Where you're lost in it. I wish I could see it now. But servicing this pussy is my fucking job, isn't it? My privilege."

He lifted my hips higher, going even deeper. I took a hard inhale as I catapulted into the sun, feeling the warm molten pleasure overtake me.

I was breathing hard but I knew it wasn't over.

I knew now was the time to admit my virginal status but I couldn't get myself to say anything. I wanted it exactly how we were now. I liked this moment. I would remember this moment. Where both of us wanted each other so bad we were lost to it, slaves to our own pleasure.

He wrenched my body down the mattress and I heard the clink of his jeans falling to the floor. He must have pulled out a condom from his pocket because I also heard the tearing of foil.

We were making eye contact but I didn't dare look down there. He was big and I didn't want to psych myself out. I wanted him. I wanted him to fill me.

"Remember what I said to you that day in the classroom?" he asked as he rubbed himself on my slit, the fold wet and slick.

I bit my lip, not knowing what the hell he was on about but also not wanting him to stop.

Carter slapped my ass again as punishment. Forcing me to snap out of my haze.

"When you told me I um-" I stuttered as his fingers played with me. "That I um-"

"I'm waiting princess," he said, forcing me to look at him. Reminding me of what we were doing.

"My God Carter, it's so hard to think when you- you touch me like that," I said breathlessly.

He bent his head lower, almost biting my neck before rasping into my ear. "I told you I wasn't going to blow inside this pussy unless you asked me. And now I want to hear it. Matter of fact I'll stop right now if I don't."

My eyes hooded as his hips pumped into me knowing that if I shifted, just a little, that he would fix that ache between my thighs.

"I want you inside of me," I said after one of his hands played with my breasts. "Please Carter."

The bed was shifting due to his thrusts and on the word please, he didn't even hesitate before driving all the way inside of me. Plunging as deep as he could go.

On impact, I heard my gasp of pain echo through the room as I clutched the sheets beneath me in surprise.

It hurt like a motherfucker. And I guess I figured it would, but not this bad.

Carter had frozen in place on top of me. Staring at me in disbelief. Shock not enough to describe the look on his face.

"Fucking hell Spencer," he cursed as he looked down at me. "You're a virgin?"

I opened my mouth to speak but I quickly got distracted. I was still slowly adjusting to his length and getting used to the lessening pain.

When he shifted a bit I remembered what was happening and forced myself to respond. "Um, well I was," I whispered, still gritting my teeth a bit.

"How?" he asked.

I wanted to scratch my head. What did he mean, how? I knew I had held onto it longer than most but I was only 20. I wasn't that old. "Well," I said, starting to explain. "I mean circumstances and life and-"

He cut me off. "All the stuff we've done you've never done before?" he asked, just now picking up on my lack of experience.

I felt my face heat. I knew what it looked like now but at the time, I wasn't trying to hide it. I was even a little surprised he didn't figure it out earlier.

"I had never even held hands with a guy before you," I revealed.

I didn't count the abuse. I tried not to think about the abuse. That wasn't something that deserved to count.

Carter distracted me from my thoughts when his hand came to my jaw. Speaking with remorse in his tone as he observed me. "I would have been different if I knew. You have to believe I never would have hurt you like this."

For some reason I felt my eyes well up at that. And I knew if I wasn't careful I was going to blow. I also put my hand to his jaw in response to his obvious regret and cut him off.

"I know Carter. And I thought about it," I admitted. "Telling you. But I didn't want anything different than this. I'll savor the memory now. Knowing that we found our way here without having to think about it."

His eyes shut. "Still, Spencer," he breathed. "I wish you would have told me. I hate how I hurt you."

Wet spilled down my cheeks, the heft dragging down my lashes. "Even this now, this memory of you, wishing you could have taken care of me, I'll always hold close. Thank you Carter," I told him, feeling genuinely grateful.

I think it was because even though I knew deep down in my gut that we would never last, it was nice to know that he gave me that. The knowledge that at one point in my life I had someone who cared about me like this.

His only response was to kiss me softly like he didn't want to hurt me again.

When he released my lips I blinked, feeling the tears drying on my face.

"Will you move please, Carter?" I asked as I gripped his wrist. "Thank you for taking care of me. But I want this and I want you. I want to feel you."

It was his turn to grit his teeth, while his thumb wiped my tears. "It scares me," he admitted as he started to move. Slower this time.

"What?" I asked distractedly as the pain started feeling like something a lot closer to pleasure.

"That I don't think I'll ever be able to say no to you."

At that I lifted up my head to kiss him as he rocked into my body slowly.

I can't say that it wasn't pain free after that or that it wasn't a little awkward. But I regretted nothing. It was perfect. I felt perfect when I was with him.