The Universe works in mysterious ways.

Sometimes things happen in your life, really bad, terrible things, and you have no clue why they had to happen the way they did. You don't understand why they had to happen to you. And you fall into this dark hole of desperation because your life as you knew it, will never be the same again. And you give yourself hell because you think you could've changed something, that if this didn't happened then this wouldn't either and so on. And you miss and miss and miss until your heart aches so much you don't know what to do with yourself, longing to bring back the past, thinking about it constantly, never moving on. Wishing so badly to go back to those days where everything felt normal, where everything was okay.

And you're allowed to feel all that. You have every right to be upset, angry, sad. But there also comes a day where it all just stops and fades away. And you finally realize that you don't miss it that much anymore. That you don't think about him anymore. It's the normal course of things, of time. My therapist used to tell me time heals all wounds and that eventually mine were going to heal as well, but in reality I think you just end up forgetting because you have other stuff going on.

And so you learn to live with the fact that things happened, you accept it and you store it in the far back of your head. You get up, dust off your pants and climb up to the surface again. You carry on with your life. It took a lot for me to get there, but I did. The Universe wanted me to wake up. It wanted me to live. It wanted me to meet someone new. It wanted me to feel love again. And I accepted everything.

But then the Universe played me once again.

The weirdest part about crossing paths with Vic Fuentes again wasn't how unexpectedly out of nowhere it was, but how easy it was for me to be around him again. I guess timing really is everything.

Fourteen years ago I would've cried my eyes out the second I saw him. Ten years ago I would've punched him in the face. Five years ago I would've awkwardly said hi and bye in the same sentence. But now, I don't know how it was all so different.

For the longest time I felt so much anger, so much sadness. And I did kind of hate him for a bit. I mean, I never needed therapy until he left. That's reason enough. And it took a lot to get myself back on track with my life, but I did in the end. Sometimes we don't give ourselves enough credit for the things we overcome on our own. But then he found me again.

It's funny how I never realized just how badly I needed to say everything I said to him today to his face. To finally let him know what he did to me. It hurt a lot to do it, to bring back everything I had put away from my memories, but I'm glad we did this, that we had this chance.

Now everything is said and done forever. Or at least that's what I'd like to think.

We listened to a few more albums on his iPod. And we sang along to a lot of other songs. And it was fine. We were fine. I was fine. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to feel like that, but I did. And I don't know what was making me stay longer. It was already nearing midnight and I showed no signs of leaving. Oliver texted me already that he was going to sleep and I replied my goodnight in a heartbeat. It was only when my sister called me, maybe an hour later asking me when was I finally going back to her house that I took it as my sign to finally go.

So now we're inside the house again, and I'm helping Vic with the cleaning of the living room. I leave the speakers where I found them and arrange back the cushions on the couch. Vic goes to get something he forgot upstairs and I sigh as I take one last look at this house. A lot of good things happened here. And I'm surprised the memories finally make me smile again. They tug at my heart yes, but it's not as bad as before.

Shortly after we walk together to where my car is parked up front. It probably takes us seconds to cross the street, but it feels longer. I can't stop wondering if we're going to keep in touch after this. To be honest I'd rather we didn't. Even if we're on the same page about what happened with us, we both have our separate lives and I don't think either of us want to get in the way of that. It would complicate a lot of things.

When I reach my car I stop by the door and turn around to look at Vic.

"So, today was fun." I joke, earning a laugh from Vic. I smile as I see the corners of his eyes crinkle.

"Yeah, totally." He chuckles and as our laughter dies down, he smiles at me fondly forcing me to look away from his gaze to avoid thinking about it too much.

"For what is worth," I hear him say. "It was really nice seeing you again."

I return my eyes to his and feel my heart go heavy.

"And I truly am sorry for what I did to you and what I didn't do and just, for everything."

I reach for his arms and squeeze his wrist.

"And I forgive you, Vic." I tell him. Because I do. Maybe I did long ago and I just needed to tell him in person to really believe it. "And I'm sorry for taking your letter."

He shakes his head. "I clearly overreacted."

"But look where that brought us," I smile and we look at each other again.

In a swift movement we both reach out for a hug. It's instant, like our thoughts aligned. Feeling his arms around me once again is so comforting, so familiar. This warmth I used to crave like air when we were in high school, the soft sound of his breathing. I close my eyes and bury my head in his neck, holding him tighter. It's like I'm suddenly sixteen again, falling in love with Vic Fuentes.

And I'm waiting for the thoughts to come, to tell me that this is wrong, that I'm over him. But they don't. He pulls away then, and he takes something from his pocket. He hands me the wrinkled envelope and my eyes travel from the paper to his face. I can feel his nerves and I can see why this is a big deal for him, so I say,

"I can't take it."

"I want you to have it," he replies. "You were right before, it's yours."

I shake my head, but he insists and I finally reach out and take it.

"What if I don't want to know anymore?" I ask.

"Then you save it for when you're ready."

I look at the white paper, my name written in the scribbles that I once knew so well. It feels thicker somehow, and then I realize.

"Did you add something?"

He nods and looks down. "I might have. But read it once I'm gone."

"Why?"

He shrugs. "It might hurt less."

I try not to feel anything, but it's impossible. My heart sinks. I nod anyway. "Okay, that makes me feel so much better."

He chuckles and shakes his head. "I'm sorry."

"Stop saying sorry."

"Alright." He looks at me and there's something in his eyes. Like something cleared out of them. I guess that's how I know this is it for us. Here's where we say goodbye.

He tilts his head and gives me a grin. "But don't be sad."

I chuckle and roll my eyes. "I'm not." I'm nostalgic, for the life we could never have.

It's not hard, actually. To picture it all in my head. Him never leaving, us going to college together, graduating, getting our first jobs. Moving in to our first apartment, or house or wherever. Having parties with whoever ended up being our friends. Going away on road trips. Getting ready for work every day. Starting a family. Hell, even getting married. It's not hard at all.

I'm surprised that I find myself smiling at all the possible lives we could've had in different universes. All these different outcomes with all these different Kellins and all these different Vics. I've come to accept that it's all wishful thinking and that for now we're living in this one, but imagination is not a crime.

And who knows, maybe in one of those universes we got it right from the beginning. Maybe there was never an accident. Maybe we never went to that party or that driver didn't drink more bottles that night. Maybe Vic stayed until I woke up from my comma. Maybe he called. Maybe we met again before I met Oliver, or before he met Thomas.

I guess the possibilities are endless, but for now this is what we have. And as we say our final goodbyes and I get into my car and drive away to my sister's place I think to myself, that if the Universe wants to let it happen, then maybe one day we'll meet again.

Maybe in another life.

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May 16, 202-

Kellin,
I know you're probably wondering why you have this in your hands, truth is I don't know why I'm writing this either. That letter you will read eventually holds the last of my hope to reach out to you. I wrote it the day I found out I got early acceptance at UCLA and you were still in the hospital. By then I was dead set on letting you go and let you live your life to the fullest, but I wanted that last chance of maybe changing something. It took me like twenty tries to know what to say and when I did I got too scared of leaving it for you. So I never did. I know it was the second most stupid decision I ever made. But now it finally reached you and I want it to be yours.
I will never not be sorry for my choices, and I understand if you don't ever want to see me again after today. But I will leave you my phone number, just in case you ever want to hang out or talk for a bit. You already know where to find me. I hadn't fully realized just how much I'd missed you Kell, and if I don't see you again after this, I hope you live a happy life forever.

Vic.

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August 6, 201-

Kell,
Have I ever told you that you are the love of my life? If I haven't, well, now you know (but I think you already knew anyway). I don't think I ever thought of writing you letters before, and it's odd, but it's the only way I can leave you something before I go. And maybe I should've written you more when I could. You know all I ever wrote was about you.
Things aren't going great. You will understand when you read this. Something really bad happened and it's all my fault. And that's why I have to go away, even if it's killing me to leave you. This is probably going to change the course of our lives forever, more than it already has. And that's alright if you hate me for it, I will have to take it. But I have to let you go and you should do too. I'm going to college today, in California. And even though I will be far, I want you to know that the way I feel about you will never change. You are my everything, you've always been since the day I met you and you always will be. I love you so much sometimes I feel like the world can crash and burn and it won't matter because I love you and that is enough. I would give anything to switch places with you right now. I should be the one suffering and not you. I always made sure to protect you from hurting, and I can't believe I let this happen. I will never forgive myself.
I hope you know I will always carry you with me in my heart. You will become my sun and my moon and my stars, the air that I breathe everyday and the drive that will keep me from breaking down. You'll be everywhere I go and in everyone I meet, I won't stop thinking about you.
Right now you're still sleeping, but I know that you will come back. And whenever you get to read this I hope that your life is just as you always dreamed of. You deserve the world Kell and I'm sorry I couldn't give it to you. And if by any chance you decide to forgive me, just know that I'll wait for you my whole life.

I love you forever.

V.

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THE END.

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(a/n): Okay wow, writing this was a trip. Thank you so much for reading and voting and commenting!! I know it wasn't perfect but I enjoyed it a lot. Also, if you ever watch the movie this is based on you will notice I changed a lot of things lmao I'm just noticing that. But yeah. Hopefully, next time I'll write something happy.
Thank you again if you read this whole thing!! And don't worry they can end up together in your heads, or not if you like pain and stuff.
(Btw I love that there's still some of us shipping these two like it's still 2014)
Anyway, till next time!
-g