I can't believe that Rocco would say that I am getting married to my cousin.

Yuck!

No offense to anyone falling in love with a cousin but that isn't me. Plus I consider him my brother, well...younger brother.

I am not saying that no girl should marry their cousin but that girl isn't me. No offense Hamza.

Diary,

Why did I even tell him that Hamza is my cousin? I should have let him think whatever he wanted, right?

Ya Allah, Maya. You are so stupid, but deep inside you still love him.

Just he said.

Thanks to Aunt Ayat and Uncle Naeem for making Jason realize that he is none other than my cousin who is trying to make us be together.

But why did I even let him kiss me? because you are stupid and too in love with him.

That's true, I love him.

Every day I still look at the ring that he gave me that day when he left me. The same ring that I have been wearing around my neck for the last four years and no one has ever seen it.

Not even my sister who I live and share everything with.

I love him and maybe being friends is what we need to get through the pain that I have been feeling all these years.

The pain of being hurt by the one person who promised not to hurt me. But sometimes we can't blame anyone for what has happened or what will be happening.

As for the wedding, I don't know who gave him the idea that I am the one getting married. I know that Jayden will be the one catering to the engagement food so he was bound to find out about it.

But did anyone bother to explain to him whose engagement it is? Or who are the real bride and groom?

I don't get it, maybe it's the push we needed to get to where we are now.

Alhamdullilah, we have started to be friends and hopefully, we might find love with each other or other people.

It will hurt but I will always be happy for him, no matter what.

His happiness comes first before mine.

And this is a promise that I will always keep for him to myself.

Signing off,

MayMay.