(This song is amazing so listen to it or die, sorry I don't make the rules)

I wouldn't kill to win a war

You grab Maven's hand, standing shoulder to shoulder with him to obscure the PDA. You watch as his eyes scan the room as he tries to cancel the chance of somebody taking notice of his love for you. And as quick as lightning, he places a kiss on your cheek before you release your grip and walk off. You brush off his smell from your red vest as you continue down the hall.

I don't get what they do it for

You go into Evangeline's room. You tighten the corners of the bed sheets and take off the dust around her dresser. All the while, you admire the beautiful knives and shards she has lined up all over her room. With the black and silver clothes drapes over the bed, you somehow wish this was your room. You wish you were a magnetron, someone stern and mellow. Someone without a face.

It's all so terribly vague 

I see the pictures from a thousand years of battle

You go into Maven's study, admiring the long-lasting colors of the Merandus house. So distasteful, you never enjoyed this room. It's especially menacing without the presence of the king in the first place. You tidy his papers and spend some time dusting his walls. Especially the paintings. You try not to make eye contact with the blue eyes that you knew were watching you. Did she know? 

And I think it's such a bore

But somehow, as you trace your fingers around the frame of Elara's glowing portrait, you find yourself looking up at her. She's gone now. Meaningless. And the moment Maven exists this world is the last trace of this vile woman's treasures. You pause for a second, basking in that thought. It sounds like a threat. But you loved Elara. For no reason, you admired her more than Maven at one point.

I'm really not the killing type

And you walk into Maven's room, hugging him dearly as he opens his arms for you. You don't understand what they do it for - all the violence and aggression? 

"Admire the feeling right now, Maven Calore." You whisper into his ear. He holds you closer, his hands heating up your lower back.

"I'm trying to."

I'm not the killing type 

I'm not the killing type

And with your face on his shoulder, you peer behind him to the small piece of cloth on his dresser. You can almost recognize the aura it gives off. She's downstairs, in the basement, isn't she? Not up here. Has he been visiting her?

It seemed so obvious - yet the thought still kills you. You wish you could read minds.

I've got a picture of your mum

Before the war when she was young

You sit in his study again, on the floor, looking up at the picture. You wonder what Elara would feel right now. Would she be proud? Are her paints tingling at the presence of you, the one who mourned her death? Did she know how much you loved her? How you would do anything for her? But that - that gruesome crime - you're not the killing type.

I think it's funny that she's looking to the left

And it's her son

"(Y/N), come here." Maven says from his desk. You get up from your seating in front of Elara and walk over to him. He grabs your waist, pulling you into his lap. You love how warms his hands are. Reminds you that he's real. 

And he places a kiss on your cheek - the corner of your mouth - and finally, your lips, where you gladly pull him closer to savor his taste. 

I wouldn't kill to get you back

You stare at the seat across from him after he pulls away from you. It's not pushed in. You always push in the chair after you sit in it. Who else has been sitting in it?

Maven looks at your gaze before putting a hand on your cheek. He closes his eyes and exhales through his nose.

And I've officially been asked

"She's not as important as you. Don't think she is."

You were right. You didn't even want to be. You wish he had never said anything. It would have made everything so much easier.

I couldn't kill to save a life

But if you did kill her - what would happen? Will Maven hate you forever? Would you be thrown into her very cage but never be let out? Or would he be grateful, realizing his love for you? You wish you could analyze the situation but your heart beats too fast to think logically. You're too excited about finding out which option is more likely. But you're not the killing type.

I'd rather die a peaceful piece of shit-bait 

Shame-filled coward 

Thanks

You have to stay innocent for Maven. His life is filled with blood-thirsty snakes. You have to continue to be the light. Yes, you think. For Maven. But a voice rings out through your head and you can't silence it anymore. 

What if he doesn't know it was you.

I'm not the killing type

I'm not the killing type, I'm not

Maven grabs your face, pulling you into another kiss. You grab the back of his head and pull his hair. He groans into the kiss as one of his hands goes to your breast, squeezing it lightly. 

All you can wonder is if Mare could understand how good it feels.

You kiss him harder, feeling your lips get weak from under his intense pressure. You know he loves you. You know it. But why is it so hard to accept? Is it because he never says it? Is it because he still thinks of her? 

But I would kill to make you feel

You lick your lips, pushing Maven down on the bed. He gives into your overpowering movement as he lays down, enjoying the feeling of you kissing him gently. You run your hands over his body, never touching his skin or clothes. All the things you'd do for this boy. 

You kiss him again, watching as his eyes flutter close. You love him so much. You know you do. Your love for him makes your heart scream and wail. All you want to do is protect him. From who, you don't know. But you do know from what.

I don't mean kill someone for real 

I couldn't do that, it is wrong

You pull back abruptly, looking down at Maven as his eyes slowly open. His black, curly hair lays against the silky pillows. His eyes are bright, looking up at you with both passion and weakness. And his lips are pink, waiting for your lips once more. 

"I adore you, Maven." You confess. He smiles, nodding as he grabs your chin and forces you into another kiss. 

I just can't explain how good it feels

Your hand climbs Maven's jaw as you feel his warm skin against your own. He is taller than you but you feel like the greater person. You feel in control. That's all you ever wanted. To control the situation; to control your relationship; to control him. And as you watch his eyes flutter close you realize something about yourself. You love him. You know you do now. And you can say it with no hesitation. Love is dangerous. You learned that. Love makes you the killing type.

I just can't explain how good it feels

You go up to an isolated sentinel and stab one of Evangeline's slabs of metal into the back of his neck, watching him fall over. Your breaths are powerful and heavy as you look down at his breathless form. His white uniform gets stained by his silver blood, a color you never thought you would find beautiful against your own skin.

You take his gun. 

Guns are easy. Guns leave no evidence. Guns will prevent anyone from finding out.

And you're sure you'll be innocent for Maven.

I once stepped on a dying bird

I couldn't sleep for a week 

I kept feeling its breaking bones

You left the gun in your room, hiding under your bed. And as you sit on your mattress you can't find yourself blinking. You tried to clean yourself from the filth but the blood still remains under your fingernails and in your hair. All you could think about was the feeling of his blood, how wet and sticky it was. How good it felt dripping from your fingertips.

You wonder if Maven knows the feelings.

I heard that if you see a star at night 

And the conditions are just right

You walk down the hall, ready to go hug Maven one more time. But as you turn the corner, you pause. You see her. You don't think you've seen her before. Her handcuffed hands and the Avens surrounding her. You can't help but turn back around and head the other way. This is a sign. A well-planned sign. You can't see Maven until it's done. You need to kill her. There's no other way.

You love Maven too much.

And you know he loves you too.

And you are standing on a cliff

You grab the gun, feeling the dried up blood as you place your hand on the trigger. How did it end up love this? Before you open the door you turn back once more. 

You place Evangeline's dagger into your boot.

You leave your chambers, keeping the gun in your hand. You don't care who sees you. 

You pass people you've known for years, servants you've laughed with and shared secrets with. They eye you with a worried look. But nobody says anything.

Then you can close your eyes

You head down the dimly lit hall, wondering with one is Mares. Why are their so many rooms here? You bite your lip as you see the Avens sitting outside. Two of them. They haven't seemed to notice you yet so you crouch down, pointing the gun. You let out a breath. They're weak against you, aren't they? What are they going to silence? Hopefully your fear. You almost don't want to pull the trigger. You never wanted to be the killing type.

And make a wish and take a step

For Maven.

One bullet, hitting one in the shoulder. The other one gets alarmed immediately and stares at you, almost like they're trying to silence you. They realize before it's too late. But they can't do anything as you shoot them in the stomach. 

The door to the chamber opens and you expect the another Aven to come for you. But no, there stands a little lightning girl. The shackles aren't around her wrist and her eyes are wild with pride.

What did you do?

And change somebody's life

You wish her death could have lasted longer. It's true. You hate that it's true. All you can do now is stand above her and drop the gun onto her lifeless body. You feel nothing. It almost feels like just another day. All you can do is hope to see Maven again.

You peer inside of her room, looking into the open bathroom and at the dead Aven that rests in a puddle of water.

You say nothing as you exit the area, only after stepping in a pile of red blood.

I'm not the killing type

You walk through the halls, looking out the windows. You see the world around you. The world you haven't seen since you were young. You wonder how the flowers are doing and if they've ever felt what you felt. 

What have you felt?

You lift both of your feet at a time, testing how sticky the bottom of your feet are. You look at the tracks you have left. The servants in the room are just staring at you. But that's okay. They'd do the same thing if they were in your position.

But I would kill to make you feel 

I'd kill to move your face an inch

You open the door to Maven's room, seeing him still sound asleep in his bed. How early is it? You close the door from behind you. You're almost too scared to breathe, scared it would wake him up somehow. You only realize now how uncomfortable your boots are. 

You stand above Maven, wanting to run your hands through his hair. He looks so peaceful now. He looks so beautiful, not knowing what he's not supposed to know.

You kiss his cheek, so lightly and delicately and yet still he lifts his chin in a wince. His fingers clench as he rubs his eyes. You jump back, staring behind you. There's only a tad bit of blood on his carpet from your shoe. You hope he doesn't notice. You know he will.

"(Y/N)."

I see you staring into space

You freeze, looking at him. His eyes analyze you, staring at your calm yet ballistic face. You give him a small smile, trying to soften your gaze and relax your shoulders. He sits up, still staring at you.

All you can do is kneel in front of him and place your hands on his knees. 

You want to cry. But you hold it in. 

What have you done?

Maven stares at you before pulling you into a hug. His hands grip you tightly, a little too tight for your comfort. 

"What did you do, (Y/N)?"

You don't answer. You just focus your gaze on the wall in front of you. You will never be able to breathe the same air again. Neither will he.

His body heats up as he stares at the blood on his floor. He looks at your boots, trying to correlate the two. Red blood. All he can see is red blood.

"I love you, Maven."

I wanna stick my fist into your mouth 

And twist your Arctic heart

He pushes you away before standing up. You scramble up and force yourself in front of him. You both stare at each other in the eyes. You try to think this through. 

He just got up, and he doesn't have his bracelet. You realize this quickly. But where is it? 

You don't dare break the eye contact as you pull him into a kiss. Neither of you closes your eyes. 

Yes, I would kill to make you feel

You push him back before turning your head around, not spotting the bracelet anywhere in sight. Maven grabs you tightly and throws you on the floor. Your head hits the floor but you ignore the horrible nausea feeling that accompanied it. All you can do is look up at Maven as he rummages through his drawers. 

What can you do? He wouldn't kill you, would he? The love of his life?

Your hand finds itself in your boot, searching for the dagger you took from Evangeline. It still has silver blood on it. 

He wouldn't kill you, right?

I just can't explain how good it feels

You stab Maven in the calf, watching him crouch over. Something falls from his hand. You see the bracelet bounce against the floor. You keep one hand on the dagger as you reach for the bracelet. The dagger slides out of Maven's leg as you hold the bracelet tightly. 

I just can't explain how good it feels

Maven grabs your leg and pulls you close to him but you throw the bracelet across the room. His touch is like fire, making you yelp as he throws a fist into your stomach. You lift your leg and kick him in the jaw, you both laying on the floor as a mess of limbs and heartbreak. 

You grip the dagger tightly.

I just can't explain how good it feels

You love Maven so much. Even as you look down at him now, eyes wide in hatred as his hands grasp for anything that would help him win. He was never one too strong. Time seems to slow as you observe his beautiful features. His lips that you would kiss so passionately are twisted into a yell. Silver blood covering the floor around his legs, staining your legs as you sit up.

You love him. 

But not as much as you did before.

You can't feel anything.

But it feels so good.

I just can't describe-ibe-ibe-ibe die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die

You stab the dagger into Maven's throat. His hand grips yours, squeezing you tightly. You wince and whimper, looking down at his twitching form. You almost want to take it back. To kiss his lips once more. What have you done?

There was no other way, though. He wouldn't have listened to anything. He wouldn't have cared. He would have killed you. He would have hated you forever. 

You were supposed to be innocent for him.

You rest your chin on his chest as his body limps. He still smells like Maven. 

Blood stains your cheek as you kiss his neck once more.

I'm not the killing type

You stand in front of Elara's painting, looking at her horrendous form. She's hideous. 

You look her in the eyes as you stab the dagger into your chest, Maven's blood still wet and staining the skin around of the hole he created.