Practice was f*cking brutal today. With midnight madness just a few days away Coach is starting to work everyone of us pretty hard and is not tolerating any bullshit from our end. It started with Wesley turning up a couple of minutes late last week. Normally it's only the individual who's messed up paying for their actions since he hates tardiness but Riley wasn't having it. He called everyone out on their screw ups. He was tired of how Ryan was fucking up his screening, Joseph couldn't hit one damn layup and I had to take a break because my knee nearly fucking gave out.

It's the first time it's happened ever since I got back on the court. I sat in coach's office while he spoke to my PT for almost thirty minutes asking all the questions to ensure that it's safe for me to play. She confirmed that it's normal to happen as I injured it pretty badly during my accident but I shouldn't worry too much about it. I hope it doesn't f*cking happen again. With me being back as the captain, I need every bit of my body to work.

So the past few days have pretty much been the same sh*t for me and the days have sort of blurred. Practice at 6 in the morning, classes, gym repeat (except that Wednesday that Ashley called me over to her place. It wasn't a planned f*ck but it was definitely needed). I even have to get schoolwork done so I can maintain my GPA before Riley comes for my f*cking head. He's already made it clear to Bradley and Mark that he'd have to bench them if their attendance and punctuality to lectures doesn't go up. Safe is better than sorry. I've seen coach bench his best players for important games.

Right now Sawyer's gone to Walmart to pick up some drinks for his upcoming party and Bradley's locked up in his room blaring music loudly. Not that I care. He's been in a pissy mood since I dropped Mila off at Bronte's for the weekend. I know how much he loves her and it's obvious he enjoys her company but I don't want that anymore. My enemy is her enemy too even though she doesn't act like it. Plus it gives me pleasure knowing that he's pissed about it.

Dante and I are playing FIFA while Ryan is knocked out cold on the couch with a blanket over him. He went to some party last night and has been sleeping since we got back from practice. His fraternity locked him out again so he's crashing at ours until he's allowed back in the house.

"Dude, did you really think I was going to let you score." Dante laughs and I roll my eyes. He's way too cocky about being the best at this game. If this was Call of Duty we wouldn't be having this conversation. He would not last one minute in the Battle Royale war-zone.

"Shut the f*ck up." I reply when the game goes on timeout after I substitute a player.

"I saw Samantha today." Dante declares as he grabs a slice of pizza from the half empty box sitting on the coffee table "She looks really different."

"Yeah she cut her hair and shit." We both stay quiet for a few seconds as we wait for the game to start up again. It doesn't take a genius to guess that whatever she had going on with Bradley was the reason she cut her hair. "Extreme makeovers after a relationship ends are not uncommon in women. It gives them a feeling of a fresh start and brand newness." I add quoting one of the many magazines I had to read when I was a few minutes early to Schumacher's office. I wait for Dante to question my knowledge but he doesn't.

Instead he proceeds to speak softly. "She was really different. I feel like they could have meant something, you know?"

"I know." I reply honestly when the game comes back on. I momentarily forget that the teams swapped sides and passed the ball to the wrong direction and I frown  "some people just don't want to get the help they need."

I ignore just how hypocritical that sounded and focus on the fact that it's true. Bradley did do the girl dirty. And she didn't deserve what he did to her, especially with how much she gave to him. Nobody deserves to go through what she did especially if she might have been in love with him. But as messed up as it sounds, she knew what she was getting into with a guy like Bradley. She made herself available to be used. And now he's moved on to the next-which just happens to be my girlfriend and any other girl he can f*ck over. Sometimes I tell myself it's the sh*t he's into that messes with his head. I still don't understand what Alexia sees in him. I try hard not to picture both of them in her bed together.

Don't think about that.

"Are we bad friends?"

As far as I'm concerned, Bradley isn't my friend and Dante knows that. I'm guessing he's asking on behalf of himself and Sawyer.

"Why?"

"For not trying to get him to stop using that shit. It could get ugly."

"Look, I'm not trying to meddle in Bradley's sh*t. He's a full grown man. He should know what's good for him and what's not."

I'm just happy I stopped using before shit got out of hand. I hate that I let Bradley convince me into doing it. And that's the thing about Bradley-he made you believe every bad thing is the best thing that can happen in your life.

"You knew it wasn't good for you to come back on the team this year but you did." Dante shoots back.

"That's not the point."

"All I'm saying is you could have waited to January to heal properly. It's not like the team's running away."

"East for you to say when you're already drafted." I tell him. He knows I'm f*cking over the moon for him and the guys. "The draft teams aren't going to wait around for me. What happens when they don't see or hear about me? They'll think I'm f*cking dead."

"Not when you have Riley as a coach. Plus we all know those teams are dying to sign you."

"Dude shut up and play." I instruct.

"You know I'm right." Dante's always right and I hate it. "As I was saying, I invited her to the beach house party provided that she brings along one little friend-" He pauses for effect and throws me a suggestive look. The shock in my eyes convey my no f*cking way reaction and he replies with a yes fucking way nod.

"Elle-"

"Lorrai-Elle-" I correct myself quickly but judging by the weird look I get, I know he caught on to the name. "Elle. Of course Elle. How could I forget your woman crush everyday."

"Why the f*ck would I invite Lorraine?" He asks even though I tried to divert his attention from it. I shrug nonchalantly because isn't that question of the day. Why would he invite Lorraine? "What's the deal with you guys anyways."

"There is no deal." I mumble, quoting the sophomore's words. "That's the problem." Dante gives me that what the fuck are you talking about expression that you have when you have no clue what someone is on about and I sigh. I can't be bothered to explain it to him. Not that there's a perfect way to say I asked her to be my fake girlfriend to get back at my ex girlfriend and best friend even though I don't give a shit about them but she turned me down. "Nevermind."

"F*cking invite her if you want her there. Sawyer did say bring a plus five."

"Nah. We ain't friends like that." I mumble paying too much attention to the game in front of me. I must admit I'm a bit angry with the sophomore. I have no clue why. I've made good to my promise of leaving her the fuck alone and it seems that's exactly what she wants. The last time I saw her was stats class on Tuesday and I pretended not to notice her for the whole lecture-even though I could see her bare neck because of that damn bun her hair was in. I need to stay away from her.

"Really? Because I could swear something was up."

Here we go again with Cupid.

"How."

"Last time you spent that much time with one girl she ended up being your girlfriend."

"Look how that turned out."

Her in bed with someone I thought I could trust with my life. So much for chasing after a girl and settling down.

"Yall just be hating on love huh?"

"Love? What the f*ck is that? Never heard of it." I've never believed in the romantic aspect of love. Growing up with parents who were never together, I didn't get to understand the concept. The only person that truly made me feel loved and valued was my sister Robin and I still couldn't love her enough to understand her. To know her. And it fucking breaks my heart that I can't go back to change my actions. Even when Alexis and I were together, I never got that groundbreaking, eye opening feeling that Dante goes on about. It's one of the reasons why I don't really give a shit about her messing around with Bradley. I didn't give her what she wanted but I doubt Bradley ever would too. "And no one is talking about love."

"You and Bradley are more alike than you'd like to admit. I can totally see why you were buds now."

Of course we are. It's the reason why we clicked immediately on the first day of practice during our freshman year. Two damaged ass boys with the hopes of going pro one day. We promised to always have each other's back. Until one of us decided to pull out a knife and stick it where it hurt. I throw the console at Dante as I glance at my vibrating phone "Game over bro."

"You're only saying that because you know I'm about to whoop your white ass."

Of course I know. I'm not about to sit here and let him win so he can gloat about how shit I am but the real reason I'm over the game is because of the name that's popped up on my phone screen. I must admit, I'm a bit surprised to see the sophomore's name-maybe even more so that she's calling me with her Instagram account. I should let it ring out since I know it's a probably a mistake but curiousity killed the cat and I find myself walking to my room as I swipe the answer button. I climb in my bed and wait to hear something from the other end.

"Hi." She says into the phone cheerfully.

It feels weird to hear her voice again but I push any thought out of my head. I need to know why she's calling me.

"Hi." I reply in a cool voice that gives absolutely nothing away "What's up?"

I can hear muffled voices from her side making me wonder where she is. "Heyyyy Rex." She says into the phone, her words coming out slurred and indistinct. Judging by the tone of her voice plus the fact that I'm not Rex, I piece it all together rather quickly.

"Are you drunk?"

"Maybe a little." she giggles "but don't judge I had a rough day."

"I'm not judging." I say quietly into the phone and wait for her to elaborate on how her day was shit but she doesn't "Where are you?" I ask against all my better judgement. I can't ignore that she might be at a party without her friends and is around people who would take advantage of her-or she is around them but they're all drunk. "Do you need me to call you a cab home?"

"You'd do me that-do that me for me?" She asks.

"If you need it, sure why not."

"You're good people Rex." She sighs "Thank you for offer-ring but I'm at home." Ignoring that she just split offering into two words, I'm glad she's home. She clearly struggles with basic English when she's drunk. "Are you busy?" She asks when I don't say anything.

I should tell her I am and hang up especially when I know this phone call isn't meant for me but for the coffeeboy. But I can't stop the next words that leave my mouth.

"No. I'm free. What's up?"

Don't be an asshole for once and hang up this phone call.

"I just want to talk."

It's not too late to hang up Charlie.

"Lorraine you can't do that! You're going to regret that in the morning." Someone says in the background mirroring my thoughts.

"No, no, it's fine. Rex's a good guy. He's not like stupid Charlie and his punk ass posse." She shouts way too loudly. Okay now I definitely want to know what she has to say if she's taking a jab at me. Still doesn't justify my actions but I wouldn't be doing this if she didn't call me.

Girls have one sip of alcohol and don't know how to act. How can she not tell from my voice that it's me? Just how drunk is she exactly.

"Charlie? You mean the guy who plays for the basketball team?" I play along.

"Yeah that one. He's an ass. I don't like him."

"Why?" I question even though I have a pretty good idea why she's not a fan. I'd like to hear it from her that she doesn't like me because I didn't want her to write my article. "He seems like a niceable guy. Everyone likes him."

"Everyone don't know him."

"And you do?" I fire back defensively.

"No." Her voice comes out soft and I feel bad for sounding like a dick.

"Exactly." I reply calmly "Maybe if you got to know him you'd realise he's not that bad."

What am I doing?

"I doubt he's inter-rested in anything other than sleeping with me and bragging to his friends about it."

Is that what she thinks I want from her? Not that I know what I want from her anyways. I may have thought about f*cking the sophomore but I don't kiss and tell. Why the f*ck would I want to brag to my friends about who I had sex with? I left that sh*t in high school.

"You think that's what he wants?"

"Whatever he wants doesn't matter. I'm sure he's moved on to the next chica."

"How'd you know that."

"Well for starters, he's complete-ly ignored me ever since we last saw each other-kinda like we never existed in each other's lives."

I hate the fact that it makes me happy that she noticed my standoffish attitude towards her. I shouldn't care.

"Did that hurt?"

"A little bit."

The drunken honesty of the entire conversation makes me smile a little as I reach for the remote and switch on the small tv in my room.

"Maybe you should call him or something. I think-"

"Look, I see how you look at me. I mean those suggestive glances have to mean something... right?" She cuts me off, probably tired of talking about Charlie.

"Right." I say unsurely. I know she's not talking about me anymore but about Rex who clearly gives her suggestive glances. I nearly snicker at that because the Rex James that I know gives every girl suggestive glances and fucks about with every girl. He's a frat boy for God's sakes. It's not like I can say that to the sophomore-not only wouldn't she believe me it's also none of my business.

"I usually wouldn't do this but I met someone and she told me if I want someone-something then I should go for it because she'd do the same. She's 5!" Lorraine laughs bitterly "a 5 year old has more balls than me, like if that isn't the saddest thing in the world-actually, I can name a few more devastating things happen in in the world right now. Oh my God, did you know that the ocean's dying and women still don't get equal pay as men?"

"The coral reefs are dying." I correct "but do we really want to get into that right this moment?"

"Yeah I should get to the point. What was I saying again?"

"You were talking about Mil-a 5 year old."

"Right. Right. That's the point. The point is I remember the very first day I saw you in Starbucks in that red Pi Chi t-shirt and you told off some girl who spoke to me rudely when I asked her not to cut into the line, then apologised to me on her behalf and gave me a free cup of coffee. Thing is I usually don't get a lot of kindness from others but you were very kind to me and-" There's a slight pause at the other end of the line and for a second I think she's cut off the phone but she hasn't.

"And?" I ask.

"I've liked you ever since." She says quietly.

I knew that's what she was going to say right from the start of the call but I just didn't think she'd actually say it out. From what I've noticed being around the sophomore, she doesn't let out. She's as off closed as they come. Exactly the type of girl who would think it's alright to like a guy from afar instead of doing something about it. But alcohol changes everything.

"Hello?"

I realise I've been quiet which wouldn't be a good sign for her. But in all honesty I have nothing to say. I mean this call wasn't meant for me in the first place.What would happen when she wakes up and realises I'm the one she called and not Rex? What then? I can't just tell her what she wants to hear because that is wrong on so many levels. So I do what I should have done right at the start. I press the red button.