{TW: Descriptions/mentions of Alcohol abuse, substance abuse, overdose scare, transphobia, homophobia, gender dysphoria and other related topics. This chapter is full of memories from when Izuku was growing up into Izuku, it is a vent chapter.}

After their fight Toshinori dropped Izuku off at his house, the ride was silent only broken by the occasional music on the radio. Izuku stepped inside the front door and glanced around, nothing was out of the ordinary, it was quiet and all the lights were off just as it normally was when he came home. Moving to his room he set down his pile of assignments, he was about to start on them so he could have as much of the week to himself as he could when he heard a noise coming from the living room. Immediately thinking there was an intruder in the house he creeped out of his room and inched towards the living room silently, he peeked his head around the corner into the living room and saw a figure laying on the couch. The room was dark due to the curtains being shut giving the sun no chance to offer light, Izuku creeped towards the couch before recognizing his mother's hair spilling over the edge of the couch.

"Mom?" he called quietly, Inko didn't stir so he tried again louder this time, still no response. He looked towards the living room table, it was covered with empty bottles and spilled pilled bottles. Biting his lip he moved to turn on a lamp before returning to his mom, a worried expression covering his face. "Mom?" He called loudly grabbing her shoulder and shaking it gently, when she didn't moved he started panicking. 

"Mom!" He shouted shaking her a bit more aggressively this time, Inko stirred slightly her eyelids fluttering but not opening, "Mom I need you to wake up!" Inko's eyes opened slightly, glancing around the room before landing on Izuku.

"Hina," She slurred a drunken smile finding it's way onto her face as she cupped Izuku's cheek. Izuku sighed placing a hand over Inko's, Hina, a name meaning Angel or sunshine, Izuku's dead name.

"Yes mom, it's Hina," He murmured kneeling down in front of the couch, he was relieved his mother woke up and recognized him, there had been times she didn't recognize him and ended up hurting him before finally realizing what happened. "You scared me,"

"I'm sorry love," Inko frowned trying to sit up, Izuku helped her and sat next to her making sure she was alright. Well, he was making sure there weren't any signs she was overdosing. Inko leaned against him and grabbed his hand lacing their fingers together, "mommy's just tired honey." 

Izuku bit his cheek and looked away, his eyes growing misty at the gentle tone in her voice. It was one he missed greatly, she hadn't spoke to him like that for years. Izuku missed his mom, not the woman she was now, he missed the woman that would cuddle him to sleep after a bad dream and make him pancakes with a whipped cream smile on top. The woman who would take time out of her busy schedule to sit on the couch and watch a movie with him or listen to him ramble about the heroes in his notebooks. 

"I love you Hina," Inko whispered closing her eyes and falling back asleep, Izuku watched her chest rise and fall making sure she was still breathing as she slept. That's how he spent the rest of the day, sobbing and mourning the loss of the woman sitting right next to him as he watched her breathe.

=

Laughter and the sounds of tiny footsteps sounded through the small house, Inko was walking through the house looking in all her little one's usual hiding spots quietly laughing to herself as the giggles from her daughter got louder the closer she got to the living room. When she finally walked into the room she noticed a blanket on the couch suspiciously giggling and wiggling. 

"Hmm, I wonder where my angel could be?" She thought aloud as she wandered around the living room tapping her chin in thought, the blanket let out a loud giggle at her words. "Could she be behind the chair?" Inko peeked around the chair before letting out an exaggerated sigh, another giggle, she went around the room calling out the most random spots she could think of until she sighed and sat down on the couch. "I guess I'll never find my angel."

There was another giggle before the blanket was pushed up and a bundle of green hair barreled into her chest, "I'm right here mama!" 

Inko let out a surprised gasp and looked down at the little girl in her arms, "there's my angel! Oh how I missed you!" She hugged the little one tightly and peppered her face in kisses making the girl scream with laughter. 

- 

Hina sat at the kitchen table picking at her food, she was now 12 and had some big unexplainable feelings. Inko sat across from her with a look of worry written across her face, she had noticed Hina had been quieter and closed off as of late and it was starting to worry her. 

"Hina," Inko called, Hina didn't look up from her plate seemingly lost in her own head. "Hina, honey," Inko reached across the table and gently grasped her daughter's hand. Hina jolted slightly and looked up at her mom, "are you alright?"

Hina paused just looking at her mom, as if deciding to speak what's on her mind or brush Inko off. She sighed and slumped in her seat, "I don't know, I'm just having a lot of emotions and I don't know what to do."

Inko hummed rubbing her thumb across the back of Hina's hand, "it's alright love, I'll be right here if you need me." Hina offered her a small smile which she returned, they sat in the quiet moment for the rest of the morning. 

-

"I just don't understand!" Inko shouted, emotions were running high in the Midoriya household tonight. It all started when Hina accidentally called himself Izuku in front of his mom, leaving him to explain how he had been testing out the name Izuku and He/Him pronouns the past couple months without his mother's knowledge. 

"I know!" Izuku shouted back as he paced the living room floor, it was an accident, a mistake, he shouldn't have even tried explaining it. Izuku could feel tears welling in the corners of his eyes as he brushed back a few strands of hair that had fallen out of his braid and into his face. 

"It's just a phase, you'll grow out of it Hina." Inko brushed him off, he didn't know if she was trying to reassure him or herself. He let out an agitated sigh turning towards his mom.

"I don't know if it is, I don't feel like a girl, like Hina." Izuku explained, a few tears rolling down his face as his mother stared him down.

"You better hope it's a phase Hina, because I won't have that type of stuff under my roof." Inko growled staring Izuku down. "And what about your soulmates? What will they think when they find out about it?" 

-

About a month later the Midoriya household was cold and filled with hateful energy from both sides, Inko and Izuku rarely talked unless it was Inko asking if he had grown out of his phase yet. Izuku stood in front of his vanity mirror staring at his long curly hair, it had grown with him and was almost down to his butt. The longer he stared the more resentment he grew towards his own reflection, that wasn't Izuku looking back at him, Hina was staring back into his soul and he hated it. He turned away from the mirror with a quiet growl, he needed to cut his hair, he needed to feel more like him, not like her.

30 minutes later he was in Toshinori's car driving to a barber shop, he and Toshinori's relationship had grown over the past 2 years with him now being 14 and them meeting when he was 12. Izuku felt safe with Toshinori, he knew he could speak his mind and not have everything he said be blown out of proportion, instead it was met with understanding or questions to help Toshinori understand better. When they pulled into a parking spot in front of the barber shop Izuku looked up at it, there were pride flags hanging in the windows making Izuku smile.

"I wanted to find a place you would feel safe asking for what you need and this place had the best ratings out of every place I looked up." Toshinori explained watching Izuku smile at the shop, Izuku turned to him and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you Yagi," Izuku spoke as his face was pressed against Toshinori's chest.

"Of course, my boy," Toshinori smiled squeezing Izuku's shoulders before pulling away, "now let's go get your hair cut!"

When Izuku returned home hours later his long hair had been chopped off, he now had short hair that curled more than usual. He tried to slip into his room as quietly as possible but Inko caught him before he even got to his door.

"Hina?" She questioned looking down the hall, Izuku stilled and slowly looked up at his mother. Inko's gaze turned cold as she looked at Izuku's hair, "what did you do?" Izuku could feel his heart still in his chest at his mother's angry tone, he glanced at his door contemplating making a dash for his room and locking the door to avoid the confrontation that was undoubtably about to happen. "Well?"

Izuku straightened up, looking his mother in the eyes as he approached her. As soon as he stood in front of his mother he was struck across the face making him stumble back, he gripped his cheek looking to Inko in shock.

"How could you do that to yourself!?" Inko screamed, her face turning red with anger. Izuku just stared at her silently, Inko started berating him about how he wasn't beautiful anymore and how people are going to think he's a boy and not a girl. After 10 minutes she calmed slightly and cupped Izuku's cheeks, "I'm sorry Hina,"

"Stop," Izuku whispered, his eyes misty as he realized he didn't recognize the woman in front of him anymore.

"You'll always be my angel Hina, my little girl," Inko continued wiping away the tears that started falling from Izuku's eyes.

"Stop please," Izuku sobbed, trying to weakly pry his mother's hands away from his face but ultimately failing.

"It's just us against the world, my sweet girl." Inko whimpered, tears of her own starting to fall.

"Mom stop!" Izuku shouted pushing his mother's hands away from his face and aggressively wiping his tears.

"Then leave Hina, leave me here alone!" Inko sobbed, pushing Izuku towards the door. They both sobbed as Izuku pulled away from her and retreated to his room, locking his door behind him before jumping onto his bed and sobbing into his pillow.

He just wanted to be happy, why couldn't she understand that?

---

Holy fuck, sorry for the long emotionally charged chapter peeps! This as stated in the TW is a vent chapter, I based a lot of the feeling Izuku has towards Inko on the feelings I have towards my dad. The resentment while still loving the person putting you through that is really hard to convey properly but I will try my best throughout the rest of the story!