I know I've been away long *sighs* sorry guys I'll try to be faster

I've decided on Nina Dobrev for Ren, pretty right? pic of her over there--------->

Amy suggestions for a song for this chap?!

Lux's P.O.V.

"Finally out of your room I see" Taylor said giving me a disapproving look, I grinned shyly and nodded

"Well, at least I'm done" I said and he chuckled and shook his head

"What did you come up with this time"

I motioned for him to follow me to my room and got a box from my dresser, I opened it and took out some darts.

"Sleeping darts" I stated "easily shot and once they hit any wolf he'll just fall and black out. It helps for interrogation"

"nice" Taylor said taking the dart from me and examining it

"Okay now these" I pulled out a small bottle and smiled smugly "You know lycotine? their new toy? well one small sip of this and it wouldn't work on you. Let's see how smart they are now"

Taylor's face brightened and I smirked but then glanced at the table

"And these" I said a bit hesitantly "Are maybe too harsh but I was just so mad" I took out the bullets and fingered them "pierce right through the skin, clean shot, and then...well...it gives you about five minutes before you black out and then you'd be in terrible pain, for days while unconscious and you wouldn't be able to wake up as each organ gradually fails and...you die"

Taylor's eyes widened "Wow" he said "remind me never to mess with you" I laughed and shook my head.

I walked downstairs and was greeted by a guilty looking Whitney 

"Something wrong?" I asked her and she motioned for me to follow her out. Once we were alone she turned to me

"Look You've helped me so I owe you this. I'm sorry but I lied to you. Damon never told me you were his mate I figured it out after I attacked you" she winced "that was low of me. And he hasn't slept with me ever since you came back and even before he rarely slept with me"she gulped, taking in my shocked impression "he really has been trying ever since you came back. He regrets what he did and although I shouldn't be the one to give advice but give him a chance"

"I-I..." I said but couldn't continue, too shocked. So she lied to me the entire time "but when you got out of his room in his shirt?"

She blushed "well I was in his room before he got in and when he did and saw me on the bed he said he didn't want to not now or ever and told me to get out. I took his shirt so no one would see me and maybe Zach would notice. So I'm really sorry"

I just nodded and walked away. So Damon really was trying to make it up to me. So everything I thought he did wrong since I came has been...not true? What did that even mean? No, I'm with Jason and that's that. 

"shit" I said remembering I had to head to the garage, just perfect. I walked in the living room to get my keys and saw jason pacing with a phone to his ear, his wound was almost healed now that thelycotine was out of him and he was walking normally now.

"god damn it" he said taking it away and dialing again "Answer me"

"who are you calling?" I asked walking towards him, placing my hands on his stiff shoulders. he looked tired, real tired and depressed "Jase, what's wrong?"

"Nothing" he said and smiled weakly "Go to work your going to be late"

"Are you sure? Jase what are you not telling me?" I was sure he was hiding something, I knew Jason.

Jason shook his head "nothing now go" he placed a kiss to my cheek "We'll talk later" 

I sighed knowing this wasn't going to get me anywhere, if Jason didn't want to tell me something, he wouldn't until he felt comfortable too, that's just who he was.

"Alright" I said smiling "I'll see you later" I grabbed my keys and headed out.

When I got to the garage Damon was talking to Dean, when he saw me he smiled and I smiled back and headed for the car.

I was working on the mustang when suddenly I was rolled out from under the car and helped up

"Okay Dean so we're going now" Damon yelled to Dean, taking my hand and dragging me behind him to his car 

"Where the heck are we going?" I said trying to pull my hand away from his "Damon come on answer me"

"Parts" he said "Did you forget we need parts there's a shop almost an hour away I told Dean we'd get the parts today"

I sighed "okay lead the way" I said heading to my bike but Damon grabbed my arm

"You do know a car fits two people right?" he said "Come on your bike will still be here when you get back Dean will watch over it" he smiled at me and I reluctantly nodded, he did have a point

We got in his car and he started to drive, Damon glanced at me and chuckled

"What?" I asked

"You have something on your face" he said and I reached to my cheek, sure enough a black smudge was there, that usually happened when I worked on cars. I wiped the smudge and saw Damon looking at me, his face thoughtful "But god help me it only makes you look more beautiful"

I didn't answer him and turned to look out my window, Damon tried opening a conversation but I only answered with yes or no, or the occasional shrug. I could tell he was irritated but I couldn't help it, I didn't want him to call me beautiful, not now at least. I closed my eyes as words echoed themselves in my head.

"Like I'd have some fat ugly loser as a mate. In your dreams Lux, look I've been nice to you and ignored your stupid crush all this time because your Jared's sister but pretending to be my mate now that's a new low for you"

I clenched my teeth at the memory and took deep breaths with my eyes closed. No, I wasn't beautiful for him then and I don't want to be now, not like this.

"We're here" Damon said and I opened my eyes and looked at him; he looked sad, irritated and confused. I sighed, nodding before opening the door and heading to the store.

Damon walked next to me wordlessly, afraid of saying something wrong I guess, and gave the list of parts to the employer who nodded and told us to wait. I sighed and started walking around the store just looking.

"hello" I heard a voice say and turned to see a guy standing behind me, he was human and was obviously checking me out with a smirk on his arrogant face. But I wasn't in the mood.

"goodbye" I retorted turning around to leave.

"Hey, hey why don't we get to know each other" he asked grabbing my arm and coming closer to me

"Why don't you take your filthy hands off her before I break them" Damon's voice was cold, calm and scary. He stood beside me and eyed the guy's hand on my arm, I immediately shrugged it off.

"you the boyfriend?" he asked

"yes"

"No" I answered at the same time and the guy eyed us with a smirk

"I think she's fair play" he said checking me out again,I glared at him

"and I think you're an arrogant prick who's about to die in...I donno about" I checked my watch "Five seconds"

the guy smirked "I like you" he said and I heard Damon growl and nudged him to get him back to his senses

"two seconds left" I said and the guy waited walking closer to me "Don't say I didn't warn you" I said about to punch him but Damon beat me, sending a punch right to his face that made him fly to the other side of the room.

Damon took deep breaths and I saw his eyes turn to their usual color.I looked at the guy who was on the floor still unconscious with items from the shelf he hit around him.

"What the hell happened?" the employer asked looking at the guy on the floor with a box in his hand

"he deserved it" he said handing him some money "This should cover the parts and the damage" and with that he took the box with one hand and my hand in the other before getting out.

"you know I could have pitched in with the money" I said accusingly but the look he gave me made me shut up. We both got in the car and he put the parts in the back seat and started driving.

The tension in the car was thick, Damon was obviously mad and I had didn't know what to say.

"I wanna know why" he said after a while of silence

"Why what?" 

"Why you fucking refuse to give me a chance, why you get mad and have a freaking one-eighty degree personality change when I tell you you're beautiful. I wanna know why you fucking confuse me on what I'm doing WRONG!" he slammed the breaks and hit the steering wheel in anger "I want to know WHY"

Damon looked mad, no scratch that; he looked furious. But I looked at him straight in the eye "What do you want me to do Damon? Just run into your arms?Do you think it's this easy?"

"No but I'm trying to make you trust me, I'm trying to make you mine but you won't give me a chanceLux"

I laughed humorlessly "So now you want me Damon? After what? Because of what? My new found personality? Oh no no wait maybe it's because I'm not fat and ugly anymore. Am I meeting you expectations of how a mate should look like now?" I took a deep breath "I don't want you to want me just because I've changed. You rejected me for the way I was, don't expect me to accept you for what you are now"

I expected to see guilt, or maybe understanding in Damon's eyes but instead the only thing I saw was more anger. Wordlessly he turned to the steering wheel started the car again and darted off to the road so fast that the tires left smoke behind them. I would have found that impressing if I wasn't so god damned confused and irritated and maybe a little scared of Damon's reaction.

Damon drove so fast that without his werewolf senses we would have crashed a long time ago. The hour ride was silent and certainly felt like more than an hour until he finally pulled up to the pack house. I thought he just gave up when my passenger door opened and Damon gripped my arm tightly, not enough to hurt but enough to make me know he was serious and I shouldn't argue.

He walked to the pack house with me following, he barged in the living room and ignored the stares he got as we got up the stairs and he dragged me to his room. My eyes widened for a bit but he completely avoided his bed and ended up taking me to a conjoined room with his, his office.

He let go of my arm and went to the drawers behind him. he opened one and got out about thirty orforty files and threw them on the desk in front of me.

"These are the first files of the search I sent out for you, the files of every girl with the name 'Lux', who the fuck knew that name was so fucking common huh?" he hissed angrily bu didn't wait for me to respond as he brought out an even bigger pile of files.

"These are the files of every girl who looks remotely close to you since I thought that maybe you changed your name so we wouldn't find you. I looked through all these photos and just knew they weren't you. Something was always wrong with them."

He then pulled out the smallest pile, about ten or so files and looked at me with the same anger in his eyes "and these, these are the files of the girls with the same name and same looks as you.Dead girls" pain flashed through his eyes "you know there was one. She looked almost exactly like you in the picture. I had to go over there and make sure it wasn't you. For twenty four hours I prayed it wasn't you, I prayed you weren't dead." his eyes were a bit glassy now "for twenty four hours I tried to prepare myself...that my mate might be gone. That she might never know how much I wanted to be with her. My freaking MATE"

I stared a him shocked, speechless as he pulled out a single notebook and handed it to me "open it" he said and I looked at it hesitantly not sure about opening it "Open. It"

Shakily, I opened the notebook and gasped as I looked at the first page, it was a drawing, a drawing of me before two years ago, I flipped to the next page and saw another drawing of me, this one not just of my face but all of me. I flipped through all the pages and they were all of me; smiling, frowning, confused, mad and the last one...hurt.

"We didn't have any picture of you other than the one with Jared and that was too old, you'd changed since then. So I drew one. And I guess I just found it comforting, drawing you, when I missed you I would just sit here for hours and either look at them or make new ones. Stalkerish I know but I wouldn't have been able to live with the guilt, the sadness if I didn't. This one" he pointed at the one of me looking hurt and sad. "This is the one I couldn't get of my mind. When I re- when I told you I didn't want you. I won't ever forget the look on your face"

I didn't know what he was feeling, a mixture of emotions showed but anger dominated 

"So don't you dare say I didn't want you until now. If you would have stayed, a day more. You would of had me on my knees begging you to forgive me. It was never about the way you looked Lux. Believe it or not I made a mistake, I was stupid because I was terrified. I was terrified knowing that I had to handle a whole pack in a year, at seventeen I was gonna lead a pack Lux. I don't know what I was thinking, maybe I thought it would stall it but I was scared, of course I wouldn't tell that to anyone. I'm the freaking alpha. It's a shitty excuse but it's what happened, I made a mistake. A mistake I'll remember for the rest of my life. But it was never about the way you looked"

I stood there flabbergasted. What was I supposed to say? Oh god this was too much information to get in one day. What does this mean? Damon never cared, he never cared about the way I looked.

"I-I" I tried to make a sentence but couldn't

"Just forget it Lux." he snapped at me and then took a deep breath "just leave please, I need to calm down I'm not in full control right now"

I nodded and got out, I needed to think. All this time I was mad at him over the wrong things. now everything was out, what the hell was I going to do? I groaned and went to my room, throwing myself on the bed. How the hell did things turn out to be totally different than what I thought they were?

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Okay I didn't edit this guys so there might be some mistakes but my laptop is busted and I'm working on my old PC which is really irritating so the chapters will come slower till I get my laptop back fixed. bear with me plz :(

Okay so I LOVED writing this chapter, I've been imagining this scene in my head for a while now and couldn't wait to reach it :P Now I have another scene i'm itching to write *sighs* it will never stop :P

hope you liked the chap :D

Comm, vote and tell me whatya think :D