"How do I make you stay, my heart’s lament,
Beneath the moon’s soft gaze, where shadows weep?
Your presence haunts each dream with sweet torment,
While war's cold grasp does into silence creep.

In distant fields, where honor bids thee roam,
A child within me quickens, life anew.
Thy spirit’s echo fills our quiet home,
With love that ever steadfast will be true.

Though distant drums of battle steal our days,
Our bond remains, a beacon through the fray.
In whispered prayers and love’s eternal praise,
How do I make you stay? How do I make you stay?"

⊱ ───ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ─── ⊰

As the sun dipped below the horizon, painting the sky in hues of crimson and gold, Mai stood by the window of her room, the soft evening breeze whispering through the sheer curtains. Her heart fluttered with anticipation, knowing her love would arrive any moment. Theirs was a connection that had ignited like a sudden flame, fierce and all-consuming.

"Mai," he murmured against her lips, his voice a husky whisper. "I've missed you."

Her hands found their way to the nape of his neck, fingers tangling in his hair as she pressed herself closer. "I've missed you too," she breathed, her words mingling with his as they kissed again, deeper this time, their bodies molding together with a hunger that had been building for days.

Cheon Seok's hands roamed down her back, tracing the curve of her spine before resting on her hips. They sank into the pillows, the room around them fading into oblivion as they lost themselves in each other.

Mai's fingers danced over the buttons of his shirt, undoing them one by one until she could push the fabric aside, revealing the toned expanse of his chest. She trailed kisses down his neck, savoring the taste of his skin, the way he shuddered under her touch. Cheon Seok's hands were equally busy, slipping under her blouse to caress the smooth skin beneath.

He pulled back for a moment, his dark eyes smoldering as he looked at her. "You're so beautiful, Mai," he said, his voice thick with desire. "Every time I see you, it's like the first time all over again."

Their lips met again, more urgently this time. The air around them crackled with electricity as their kisses grew more fervent, their touches more daring. Mai's blouse slipped off her shoulders, discarded carelessly onto the floor, followed by his shirt.

They moved together with a rhythm that felt as natural as breathing. His hands explored every inch of her.

Time seemed to stand still as they became one, lost in the heat of their passion. Every touch, every kiss, was a promise, a declaration of a love that burned brighter than the setting sun. As they lay entwined in each other's arms, the world outside ceased to matter.

⊱ ───ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ─── ⊰

"But you know, I love crime stories and whenever there's this one criminal who can not come in terms with the loss of someone, they are labelled as having schizophrenia. But how you describe it doesn't sound remotely same." The bag of chips found their place inside her locker.

Yes, that was what distracted me. She has a locker in her room where she keeps snacks to munch on whenever she wants and there's no one who has a single dot of idea about it. Why didn't I come up with something like this!

"Hmm, good question." I came back to the real world again as she gave me a bowl of chips with a red sauce, perhaps Tabasco. "You see, that is where I cannot understand schizophrenia. I have always reprimanded myself by saying that I'm dyslexic and it's fancy when people pick up things quickly."

"Being a slow learner doesn't necessarily mean dyslexic." Y/n interjected.

"That's what noona always told me. However, oftentimes schizophrenic people are really fast learners because they learn two different sets of skills for two different apparent entities. I see people but I don't live their life. Schizophrenic people necessarily live the life of the other entity." I finally realised how much far from truth all my previous diagnosis were. I see the martyred soldier but I don't experience living his life.

"So what you want to say that if in fact you were schizophrenic you should have lived the life of the soldier, performed what they do from their perspective and not from the perspective of a bystander?"

"Exactly! That's exactly what I want to convey but I never found the words to elaborate it." I quite literally oged my eyes out of my eye socket in excitement.

The natural idea of an owl being shocked, close you eyes, imagine it, yes, that's what my face looked like.

Y/n however had a contrasting expression of happiness, like she was satisfied with her research and strength of words. Fancy pants Mcgee over here. The thought though made me laugh.

"You see, this is why psychiatrists have a hard time solving the criminal psychology. Because criminals also do not explain that they think completely, that is if they live a the life of another person or if they see that as a bystander. But you clearly know that you are a bystander, I hope so."

"Yes, yes, I'm a bystander. Because I have seen Cheon Seok and Mai in their intimate situations as well."

"I didn't need to know that." Y/n scrunched her nose and turned the other way, haphazardly stuffing her mouth with chips. That was her way of controlling envy.

"No, don't worry, I wasn't seeing myself. Like, not exactly." I quickly changed the words. I have never had a relationship let alone intimacy.

"Hey, do you watch porn?" I was taken aback why such an abrupt and absurd question out of no context. Y/n was random, very, very random.

"No. Why?" I looked at her with a partial disgusted look. I must say I thought she does because that's a huge red flag to me. And after I heard the plight of such actresses from Jimin and their pain, I completely protest against it.

"Thank God! That's a huge pull off for me. I know a lot about you but I have to specify a few things beforehand. I want neither of us to hurt. We're broken enough to break anymore."

I couldn't keep standing at the last words. The words of my heart are spoken by my eyes. And I say the truth when I say that I won't breath without her by my side. That is how much I want her, that is how much she matters to me. I can fall and shatter but I shall not see us shatter.

I engulfed her close to my heart. I have seen Cheon Seok and Mai torn apart. I have no physical wars to fight and I will not let my internal wars be fought by us, be at stake of us.

"Don't say that. I can't fix you and I don't expect you to fix me either. But I will not let us shatter. I will rather die than let what we have die."

"And I wouldn't let you die until we're old and grey and really, it's the end of our timeline."

We stayed in that silence. The exquisite pleasures of being in complete silence is an ephemeral instance of comfort, because the act of being in silence is pure and simple. And to me, this was what romance meant.

"You remember, how you once told me that love was like fireflies? So damn real but so surreal?" Y/n nodded, her arms still clenching onto me.

"That day you asked me what was my concept of love. It's nothing cosmic. It's just silent. I love being in silence and watching, feeling and learning in silence. To me romance is the language that silence speaks. I know, it isn't romantic at all."

"Not really. My parents were mostly quiet. Never once had I seen them fight. When they had disagreements, they remained silent and somehow everything resolved. I don't know who gave up, though."

"Is loving really giving up?"

"Love isn't. Had love been so, I'd have never been with you. Because I fell in love with you the very first day I saw a photograph of you in Antonella's camera. Then the stories she told dressed you like her only source of life. She was my source of life so I started mentally idolising you. And then when we started coexisting, my love just built itself stronger."

For the first time ever I saw smile and tear up at the same time. So bad of me that this was the woman I let myself be misunderstood by.  It still hurt me going back to that day in our trip. Everything has reconciled and I confessed to this lady months back, the event being older, yet I still regret ever behaving the way I did.

"They say, when you manifest something with your whole heart, the whole universe tends to come and work for you to achieve it."

"Paulo Coelho says that. The rest just copy."

"No, Coelho in his book The Alchemist said that "when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it." But I said, when you manifest something with your whole heart, the universe works to make it happen. It's more than just wanting."

"Yada, Yada! It's the same thing in a complex sentence. Who the fuck told you that you were dyslexic? How do dyslexic people always use hard words and sentences!" See, I told you she was random.

"No one said that dyslexic people don't have vocabulary. For your information, I do write as well. And I would like to believe that I'm quite potent at it."

"What do you mean when you say "I'm quite potent at it."?" She looked me in the eye, somewhere a face of her trolling me but that was much hidden to the world.

"I mean that I'm a good writer, I'm skilled, trust me! I write poems, I like writing poems. I have, I have a, you know, erm, poem diary." I stuttered. I have no idea if she writes as well and if she does, I'm definitely a weirdo to her.

"Yes, I do trust that. I absolutely trust you when you say you're a good writer but not when you're "potent" at it, do you understand that? You know what potent means if a biological make says that? I'm quite sure you don't."

This time I was scared. Potent comes from potential, right? Right? What? It doesn't? They don't mean the same? They don't? Eh? Really?

"No, they don't. You see, potent could mean influential but that is when you use it as an adjective. But potent is more used as a noun with respect to a man." Gosh, she heard my brain again. She needs to stop mind reading.

She wasn't able to hold her laughter back anymore. It was now that I was starting to realise that no matter what, I turn out to be an idiot yet again.

"Listen, Kook, it's great that you used the word just in front of me. Not only would I love if you're potent but also not make fun about it. Had anybody else heard it, they'd think your a freaking manwhore, God!" I really do fail to understand women.

What is that, that a woman would find enticing but also make anybody else consider provocative? I wasn't giving any sexual innuendo. Or was I?

"What did I say, actually?" I finally asked.

"Potent refers to the phenomenon of... How do I put this out simply? You know, of getting an erection."

"Election? Huh?"

"Erection!"

"Erection?"

"Yes, you know, getting aroused. Getting an orgasam. How much more do you need me to describe it?"

"I don't know about you but I could describe it practically if you'd insist." A sly smirk crept on my lips quite as naturally as it for a money plant to climb up your threshold gate.

Y/n suddenly flushed into a cherry red tint. Looking at her reminded me to Mai and not in a nostalgic way but in a way that spoke of how gorgeous had the lady next me to been when I overlooked that to paint the lady in my dreams.

"Does it make you shy? Is this what we call flirting or did it just work on you?" I don't know if it made me look nerdy or the her type of nerdy but nevertheless it earned me a kiss. So I guess it's a win-win for everyone, right?

"I don't have to make it harder for you, do I?"

Cool, she wins again. But I'm all in to lose to her if that's what it takes to get another kiss.