"Live a life,
Live a life.
They say, live a life.
But what a life!
A life with my first lover
That took my roses
And left the thorns.

What a life!
A life that stands high and
Cries at night,
What a life!
An open forest in the wild
Yet no life that resides.
What a life!
Dull and gloomy
Like a devil run in the city.

What a life!"

⊱ ───ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ─── ⊰

Life is beautiful. Life is the most precious gift of God. Life is a treasure of jewels worth a million and more.

Life is a theatre that shows all its colours and characters one by one on the stage, which may be dark and bright. Sometimes it's pastel and sometimes colourless.

The dark shades of life make us realize the depth of life because life is just not a bed of roses or a friend of ours.

As it is rightly said, "The stream would have no song if it wouldn't have rocks in its beds.", people forget that a song has a member that strikes them to produce vibrations.

Yet not all vibrations sound like a lullaby of love and affection. Some are cacophonous and nothing but a cause of pain.

The trying, enduring episodes of life make us more insightful and patient. They make us view life from a different perspective, and help us explore new possibilities.

But how long? How long was life supposed to give the poor maiden thorns, pain after pain? How long was life supposed to mutilate the repository of her pure amour?

The pains and sufferings in life make us judge the importance of pleasure that is the beauty of life.

But, why always her? What wrong had she done?

The sun goes down at the set time and the streets are empty again. Who would be out in the darkness? Yet there's only one person left at the same place as yesterday. She doesn't know how to leave.

How would she? A promise made can't be broken, can it? Liars! She was broken like a promise. But she couldn't break her promise. How could she?

The rain drips and drops off her red umbrella. What a life! A white lie is all that a promise means. A lie that kept her standing just like the girl in a ragged linen frock, just like the lady in elegant satin. A lost promise, an everlasting lie.

⊱ ───ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ─── ⊰

"Are you tired?" My eyes fell a victim to the tyrant rays of the tube light at the other end of the room while I tried to move my motionless body to shield them.

A dulcet dripping of droplets through the phthalo incised leaves, escorted a pleasant melody in my ear. The scent of wet mud spoored through the ajar glass window, which had been scrutinizing the little shades of the darkness outside.

Another pleasant aroma hit my nostrils but I couldn't recognise it. Neither could I recognise the pearl bedspread which was humected from the blazing heat of my body. What I could recognise was the mellitus voice next to me.

It was difficult to open my eyes and witness the world around me but I successfully opened my sensory apparatus that collects light from the visible world around us and converts it into nerve impulses, to register the world I was in.

"Jk, it's me." I heard her again and felt my throat suffering a drought when I spoke with crackling words.

"I can understand. Where are we? This... This isn't my room." I brushed my limbs around the bedspread, trying to feel any resemblance to the room I slept last night.

"This is Chan's room. You had a panick attack. He brought us here." Y/n slowly whispered in my ear. Her voice was subdued by the noises in my head and I found it difficult to communicate with her.

Everytime I had a rush of pressure inside me, I knew I had messed up. I knew I had messed much of everything.

"Is... Antonella here?" I pushed my body to sit up. Y/n held my arm and helped me adjust to the change in my bodily functions. It was the first time I felt her touch on my skin but something was much different than anybody else. It felt familiar and homely.

"I called Antonella. She said that she'd come in no time but it's been 2 hours already." I nodded, staring at the pearl bedspread.

I am timid and shy. I used to be bullied for my personality. And I am ashamed to accept that it's not the first time I messed it up. I have always done. But all those times, I found Antonella next to me.

Uncle Lee is a great man who took care of his best friend's son but I suffered the initial life as an orphan. Let anybody take care of you, parents and foster family isn't the same.

Yet, Antonella made it a home. And not having Antonella right next to me as I opened my eyes, felt strange and at the same time kept me in distress.

"Where is Jimin?" I asked, biting my lips. I know, whatever I did, I damaged my impression around him.

"I am here." His delicately strong voice was followed by his hard stature leaning on the frame of the door. Right next to him stood Chan, some inches shorter than him. I hadn't noticed it earlier in the day but Chan was actually a pretty handsome guy and a little shorter than Antonella.

"Ah... I... I'm sor-"

"It's okay. Don't apologize. I already needed a reason to get that car thrown out of the garage. Now, I can. Just tell me one thing, are you okay?" Jimin walked over to the left side of the bed, sitting near the window.

"I... I don't know."

"You don't have to tell me about your emotions. Just tell me, are you physically okay? Did you get hurt?" He hovered his body over the edge of the bed, resting his left arm over his thick thighs.

"I think... I am. I am..." I looked down, guilt overtaking me.

"Fine. Once Antonella's gets here, we'll go home. I'll be outside in the garden." He abruptly got up, walking briskly outside the room.

"Hey, JK. What happened, mate? Were you scared of him? I mean, yeah he does looks like he can gobble you up at any moment but, trust me, he's a very nice guy. A very good personality." Chan walked over, sitting beside me. He passed me a bottle of water for which, I'm grateful.

I quickly opened the cap and chugged down half the bottle, quenching my thirst. I might have looked like a sleep deprived soul but I was afraid of everything that went on.

"Chanie, it's raining outside. Please bring Jimin in. He can't be outside." Y/n looked Chan who silently followed her.

I sat there alone with Y/n in the room. She looked like she was worried, equally in distress as me.

A long minute of silence reigned over us and I tried to speak when I noticed, she had gestured me to stop speaking. I do not know if I had said something unforgivable or if everything that I did is more than just a mess. What I could actually understand was that, just because I am sick, a patient, Jimin is keeping his anger inside.

What did I do that his car was harmed?

"You're thinking of Antonella, aren't you?" Y/n spoke.

"Hmm. You said that she was supposed to be here 2 hours ago but she isn't. I'm worried for her." I replied.

"That's the same thing that's bothering me. But you're thinking of it because you hoped to see Antonella next to you, didn't you?"

"I mean... I don't tell this to anyone but, I have had past trauma and panick attacks. And everytime, Antonella would hug me tightly and protect me from the world. She grew up, I grew up, we grew up; but..." I paused in my sentence. I wanted to cry.

"You would hold her and cry. I know, it must be hard for you right now. You can cry, no one will see. I'll also leave the room. Cry as much as you want." Her soft arms wrapped around me, comforting the standing hair on my skin.

No one in world can ever truly understand you. People know only how much you show them and they understand half of that. For people like me, reserved and closely knit by, people don't understand us at all.

No one does. Not the slightest.

It has been said that understanding is the greatest gift we can give people. Understanding removes the feeling of being alone. Understanding is non-judgemental and kind. Understanding from another helps us understand ourselves and this leads to empathy.

But no one understands.

"Jeon Jungkook, it's okay to cry. Crying is not a sign of weakness. It just shows that you're brave. Because you've been through it all and yet you choose to cry and not escape. Do you know how many people die because they don't cry? Some of them die inside and no one knows, no one sees," Her fingers brushed through my hair, making me feel a significant amount of authentic joy. It felt like she knew what I wanted to tell the people. It felt like she was my gemina.

"Often times, we don't know what goes on inside us. It's okay to not know what's going on inside us. It's completely okay to have something that you don't want people to see. But don't hide it. Evolve with it. What you don't want others to see is what you don't like about yourself. And changing oneself for themselves is not illegal. What is lost is never gone."

"I don't know what I did. I... I have schizophrenia. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I did. I don't know what's happening with me." Hot droplets of saline liquid streamed down my face. She wrapped my hands around her, pulling me closer to her warmth and slowly rocking me. It felt like I knew it so bad.

"I guessed it. Don't worry. Everything will be okay. You can cry. You can confide in me. You can tell me whatever you want. If you're angry, you can insult me. You can kill me but I'd still listen to you." A spark of laugh escaped my lips when I heard her. I sniffed and smudged my tears.

"Don't abuse me though, yeah. I'll kill you too." She laughed. What a beautiful laughter, carefree and happy.

"I won't, haha. But I still want to know, if Jimin is extremely angry with me." I said in a pitch only audible to her.

"He is actually. Don't think of him. He gets angry a lot and forgets it too soon. Tomorrow, when he meets you, he'll have forgotten that anything even happened. I sometimes think that he's bipolar and inorder to treat himself, he chose to be a psychiatrist." She joked.

"I wouldn't surprised." I joined her joke. I had already felt closer to her when we both did the same mistake and now, I felt better with her.

"You know, you only know what he shows. Yes, I agree with Chanie, he does look intimidating and might even eat you up. But, I have lived with this man and Antonella for atleast 3 years already. I swear to god, Jimin is the dumbest human to exist. And Antonella is even dumber. I guess we're joining that trope."

"Would we?" I cackled at her jokes.

I don't know what I was feeling, I absolutely never do but whatever I was feeling, I didn't want the moment to pass.

"Maybe, maybe not."

___________________________________

Hey Rosairises!!

I'm so sorry for such a short chapter.
I didn't really know how to not digress it and stop at any better point.

But hey! I promise I'll update soon!

And yeah, so my year as a highschool fresher finally ended and now... I'm in the sophomore year.

Yes, this is going to be a pretty hard year with an enormous amount of studies and school stuff. I am expected to score impeccable marks but wait!

Let's rejoice first.
I promise to you all that I'll not stop writing and also score the bestest of what I can.

So, that's all.

And don't worry, Jimin isn't a bad person in the book.

I love you!!

Kay Bye~