Trigger warning: use of sedative drugs, torture (form of waterboarding) and other violence.

Please read with caution.

HARRY
STYLES

I didn't know you can hate someone you love.

Niall stands in front of the mirror, crystal blue eyes concentrated on his reflection with both hands held up trying to fix his chestnut hair to whatever he considers perfect. "Niall," I called out for the second time. "Yeah, yeah old man I'm coming," he claims yet doesn't even make a move away from the mirror.

"I'm younger than you, asshat," I reminded him since clearly, he definitely needed to be. "Minor details, Styles," Niall brushes off finally deciding that he's had enough. I looked around, seeing all the colourful toys scattered around. "And you're the one with a fucking child," I added to my previous statement.

"Hey, leave Sunny out of this," Niall says as if he's trying to scold me and finally his tall frame walks away from the mirror. Her full name is Susannah Mariella Horan, chosen by Niall's ex-fiancé and he had no say in choosing the name. Niall calls her Sunny, the nickname fitting her perfectly.

Bending down, I picked up a purple block that had numbers written on each side and placed it in the little basket of toys he has near the couches. Niall leans at the back of one, arms crossed on his broad chest.

He's a lovely lad and if I'm honest, I don't think I would've survived as much as I did after the incident if it wasn't for him. When I was emitted into the ER, Doctor Horan was the one assigned to me. Throughout the days I stayed stuck in the hospital bed, he was the one that insisted on doing my checkups twice I day.

Years later, I still didn't know why he insisted on it since I'm sure there were other nurses and doctors.

Niall was the only person besides the useless cops that I told what happened in a moment of weakness. Sure, maybe I was high on some drugs that took the pain away. He was the only person that cared.

Made me feel that there are people out there that understand the way that I am.

Since then, there have been two more people that have roped in our plan. Regret and revenge. That's what we wanted but eventually, it became more than that.

"I saw her in the store today," I tell him with a bit of uncertainty. "You did?" Surprise lifts his eyebrows, seeming just as shocked as I was. My eyes glanced at another block near me so I turned around and picked it up, joining it with the other.

When that car pulled out from the yard at Spooky Silhouettes, I bolted to the back room where my little security room was set up. I replayed the footage from a minute ago and stopped it when Esrin's little friend came in. I didn't recognize him but one search later I found out he was Zayn Malik's harmless little friend.

I wondered by the look he gave her if they were more than friends. Then I realised I shouldn't be thinking about who that bitch is sleeping with so I pushed it away. In perfect timing, Niall called demanding a visit before he had to pick Sunny up from her mother's.

"There's something you need to see before you continue your plan with her," Niall states and I already know I'm not going to like what he says so I returned all of my attention to him. "What is it?" I asked and he goes ahead, a little hesitant at first. For whatever reason, it makes me more impatient.

"I spoke to Maggie and she said that Esrin had an insight of what was going on..." Niall reveals.

"What?" I blurted out, pure shock ringing through my mind. Especially because we were so sure. "No. That's- that..." I struggled to form words in denial. When we'd done the timeline, I didn't think that Esrin would've known. Esrin was in college the entire time, she didn't come home to visit during the winter break like I did.

When I did the investigation and dug into every detail that occurred that night and leading to it, she hadn't appeared in any of it.

It wasn't likely that she was involved, just like I wasn't until it was too late. "She knows, Harry. I think she knows everything. We can't be for certain but this changes...a lot," captain obvious states.

I sighed out of frustration, walking across the room where a red and another purple block were and returning them to the box.
"Now exactly does Maggie know this?" I asked him. This little operation of mine took four years of planning. Put into works this year that made it five years since that night happened.

Maggie better has a damn good explanation for this.

Niall turns around and takes the first file off from the messy stack of books and papers he had on a table meant to eat on. It was a new one, not the files that we have been opening and closing for months. He hands it to me and inside were three pictures.

"This shows the vehicle used that night," he says, holding up the first one. He takes the second and holds up a picture of young Erin Sage getting into the same vehicle," after finding this, it's the same vehicle, her first car. It's registered in her name."

My jaw clenched out of anger when I noticed even the number plates were the same. There was one last picture at the bottom. It was one from the security footage from the warehouse. "This is from a few days after that night, remember we couldn't figure out who was the woman getting into the car? It's the same damn car too..."

"Fucking hell..." I muttered to myself, shoving the folder at Niall. "I want her in," I decided and Niall looks at me as if that's the worst possible idea ever.

"Bring her in," I added, pushing past Niall to the messy stack he has, I took the pages and folders out and fixed the books neatly. Then next to it, I had the folders and above them, I stacked the loose pages neatly. There we go.

"I don't know if that's a good idea, H. We need to think this through. Clearly, we didn't last time," Niall admits while I move over to the Sofia the First mat that had more blocks. He isn't completely wrong I realised while putting them with the others in the box.

"Stop fucking around with my things, Harry and let's talk about this!" Niall protests annoyed that I wasn't being as persistent. "She didn't give us much of a choice..." I pointed it out and returned to my place by him. We had to act quickly when we found out she was snooping around me.

There are people that take care of what I leave behind so that I can be free to do anything as Death Hood and avoid getting caught. Never did I think that someone like her would be the one to catch on.

"Don't you agree that if she's one of them then she deserves the same treatment?" I placed the idea in his head. I feel disgusted and angry thinking of Esrin being part of what the rest of them did to me. "Of course, Harry. I'll make sure of it," Niall agrees.

"Good. She may give you a fight but she knows what would happen if she blabbers that mouth of hers. We need to know what she knows, you know I'm right about that. She isn't going to openly admit it so we may have to be a bit more...persuasive," I tell him.

"Okay," Niall smirks, loving the idea of having a good time.

ESRIN
SAGE

What gets me through the rest of the day at work is the thought of a nice cup of tea in my favourite cup with whipped cream on top, my favourite fluffy blanket and my DVD copy of Beauty and the Beast- my favourite and best Disney movie ever.

I'd just gotten out of my car, parking in the underground lot and dragged myself to the elevator. My finger was close to pressing down on the button when something covers my nose and mouth. I dropped everything I was holding the second after it happened.

With widened eyes, I realised that someone was holding me from the back with a hand around my chest keeping my arms at my sides and their other arm kept a cloth to my face. No, this cannot be happening.

The cloth was soaked in an odd liquid that smelt like a chemical and something familiar. Even though I already pulled the scent in, I held my breath and tried to fight, my entire body going into alarm mode.

Trying to shake myself out of their grasp, somehow get away this cloth from my mouth and nose but the only thing I managed to successfully do was stomp down really hard on the person's shoe. It almost felt like my entire high heel went through their shoe and they yelp in pain, the cloth falling from my face.

It's no use though, when a window of opportunity came my body had already given up and I lost. I knew it was about to happen when the dizziness was too much. I could feel myself falling backwards and hitting something with a thud.

Fluttering my eyes, I groaned at how heavy they felt on my face. Inside my head, I felt like the victim of a bulldozer.
"Good morning sunshine," a rather chirpy voice greets with an unfamiliar accent.

My eyes lift to land on the brown haired fellow that smiles down at me, him standing and I'm sitting on the floor. More like trapped on the floor. My hands were cuffed behind my back making me in a very uncomfortable position and another pair kept my ankles together.

I swallowed, dropping my eyes to look around my surroundings. A dirty room with unpainted walls and a bare, damp floor- as if someone had washed it hours ago and it was now beginning to dry. To my right, a metal table with two chairs on either side. My eyes dart across the table where the wide mirror is stuck to the middle of the wall.

I knew better than to believe that was just a mirror though. It was a one-way mirror, seeming reflective to everyone in this room but on the other side, it appears transparent. It's the kind that I often see in investigation rooms in movies. Though I was sitting too low to see how crappy I looked right now.

Turning away, my eyes found a wide silver bucket of water that stares at me. My feet were stretched out, toes brushing it. Yes, my beautiful high heels were gone as well as my suit blazer. So I was left with a turtle neck tucked into my skirt. The bucket seemed filled to the top and I could see pieces of ice in there.

"What do you want? Why am I here?" I questioned, meeting the blue eyes of this stranger. Is he a stranger though?

Demanding that they let me go was useless. Maybe asking questions was probably useless now that I think of it. "Oh, you get straight to the point, don't you?" He cocks his head to the side, peering down at me with a pout on his face.

"What do you want?" I repeated, this time with more anger and adding emphasis on every word. You know, it's going to be hard to be serious with a guy that's stressed in red and white striped pants and a dark blue long sleeved top that was rolled up to his elbows with white stars.

If the American flag could've been an outfit, this would be it.

My eyes flicked to his wrist, seeing the scratches on them. He's definitely the one that kidnapped me in the first place.

"Since you asked so nicely," Mr America sighs," I'm sorry this had to happen, really but you see, we're in desperate need of some answers from you," he starts and I begin to wonder what answers I can offer to someone like him. "The rules are the usual, you give me my answers and you don't get hurt, got it?"

He bends his knees completely so we were almost at eye level. "I'll know when you're lying, Esrin and I don't tolerate liars. You're a smart girl I've been told, you know what will happen if you lie, don't you?" Am I really such a bad liar? "Need a clue, let's just say it involves your head under some ice cold water," he offers, nodding his head in the obvious indication of the big bucket of water in front of me.

"This is Harry, isn't it?" I laughed when I realised it. No particular reason I had but all the convincing I needed was that all bad things that have been happening to me lately are because of him. Oh and the other reason would be when I knew Harry, I had a terrible fear of drowning. Of course, now I don't since it was something I worked on, learning to swim and having surfing lessons too.

"I'm beginning to think you're obsessed with me," I say louder for Harry, leaning my head back with my eyes closed. Did I know if Harry was listening somehow? No. But I don't think he'd want to miss this, probably has a front row seat behind that glass.

"Shut up," Mr America orders and I laugh again. His outfit is great but given his role today, it's funny to me for some reason. Mr America seems like a suitable name since he didn't introduce himself.

"Can you hurry this up, please? I've got dinner to make," I disobeyed, staring at him with a soft smile. Mr America breaks out a grin, straightening himself and turning around on his heel to stare at his reflection on the mirrored wall.

"I think I like her," he tells himself but I knew better, that was all the confirmation I needed once again to know that Harry probably stands on the other side of that glass simply watching and leaving his friend to get his hands dirty.

"Enough of that..." he adds softly and I listened to the sound of his boots hitting the damp floor as he walks closer to me. Mr America grabs me by the back of my head and I used all the force I could to stay put but he was too strong. Now I was kneeling in front of the bucket.

Mr America turns my head up to look at him. "Does the name Luther Lane ring a bell?" He questions. What? The shock of that name was too much for my body to stay under control and my eyebrows lifted, giving myself away. "No," I muttered, still confused by the unexpected name. Even I wouldn't believe myself.

Next, my head is pushed into the bucket and shoved under the water. He keeps me under until a few seconds later when he decides I've had enough. "Lie better next time," he tells me and I see him through a blurry vision since I can't wipe the water away from my eyes.

For more than half of my life I had a fear of drowning but it wasn't really a problem because I'd just stay in the shallow at the pool or beach. When I was old enough and realised how stupid I was being, I eased into it.  Eventually, I could've jumped into the deep end first and swim all the way into the sea.

This...is forced. I can't ease into it. The idea of drowning for me was the deep sea or feet of water that was much taller than me in the pool. Not by a damn large bucket.

"Luther Lane," he repeated stronger this time. "I thought it was an address," I lied through my teeth again with a weak shrug of my shoulders. The next second, my head is dunked under water but this time it's there for longer.

"You think it's funny?" His other hand wraps around my already sore throat, squeezing it while I was trying to recover from almost losing my breath underwater.
"Stop, stop!" I shout and his hand drops," He's my dad's friend! I haven't talked to him in years." It felt like my body was already convulsing.

"What do you know about him?" The next question comes right after. "Nothing, he wasn't that close," I answered, searching for something about him that they could be looking for but he was just an ordinary man to me.

Water fills my mouth this time when he pushes me into the bucket again. Thankfully, it wasn't as long as last time, only a few seconds but I was still gasping for air when he pulls me out. "I don't fucking know, alright! His name is Luther, last name Lane and he's old enough to be my father," I rattled off in between air intakes.

That earns me a punch across the face. Ouch. Makeup can cover that one, right? Wait, will I even be alive for tomorrow? "You won't be awake much longer so I suggest you stop playing jokes and cooperate a bit," he demanded, definitely frustrated.

"Have you ever worked with him?" His next question confuses me. "Yes," I say. "We worked together on the beach when I was eight maybe. He built sandcastles with me," I smiled widely, bloody teeth on display. "Ask Harry, I mean he was there. That was your first time at the beach," I spoke, looking at the same spot Mr America had earlier.

I feel a sharp nudge to the back of my head that felt as if he punched me and next, my head is underwater, as usual, his palm is pressed to my head to keep me under. He keeps me under until I felt like I did when Harry almost choked me until I passed out. So convinced that the next second I would drown. Then I don't.

When he pulls me back up, the thought of death enters my mind again. My chest burning, my body pleading with me for there to be longer rest between.

"Do you or have you work with him?" Mr America repeats the question."No! Why would I work with him? The last time I spoke to him was at the party my parents had before I left for college," I answered honestly. "Stop fucking around, Esrin," he gritted through his teeth.

I could see it in his eyes that he was having a hard time believing me. Ignoring what he said but I kept my eyes on him. "you're a son of a devil, Harry. Afraid to do this yourself? Sent your little boy to do it for you?" I laughed. Feeling my mouth full of a metallic taste as I spoke, I spat on the ground beside me and no surprise, it's blood.

"Why are you doing this? You're just as bad as him, you realise that, right?" I questioned. The guy pulls on my hair that he was gripping all along so tightly- it wasn't a bad feeling until it burnt too badly and I was convinced he was tearing the hair off my head. "Don't talk about me, got it? I'm the one asking questions," he advised.

I felt something close to dizzy but every minute I spent begging my body and mind to hold on longer. "Do you know what is Ivoriene limited?" He asks and the building appears in my head, his question accessing a memory.

"It's a storage space for a private agency...near where I lived. I don't remember much but I drove by it for school," I answered honestly, heavily trembling with chills or fright.

Mr America seems okay with my reply but not enough. "Very good but I'm going to need you to say a little bit more about the warehouse. Don't make me threaten those loved ones you love so much. Your life is already on the line enough, don't you think?"

I groaned at the subtle mention of a warning. "Come on, just cooperate and you don't get any more hurt," Mr America whispers, pushing back the wet strands that stuck to my face away. He seemed somewhat sympathetic but I didn't want to be fooled.

"I am...I don't know, I've never been in there, I don't know who owns it or when what's the purpose," I continued, saying more to convince him and believe me.
my head falls when he's no longer holding it and I took deep breaths, feeling the obvious discomfort in my throat down to my chest.

A different pair of shoes appear in front of me and I slide my eyes up, settling on Harry's face. That asshole. I didn't even realise he had entered the room nor was I surprised to see him. It was a nice confirmation though.

"You do realize you're killing yourself and everyone you love if you're not telling us something, right?" He calmly says, scanning my face with calculating green eyes. He'll pay...one day.

"I feel sorry for you, Harry," I started, ignoring what he said," I'm sorry for whatever turned you like this..." the words just tumbled out of my mouth, voice wobbly and heavy," p-people aren't born killers, definitely you weren't. I'd know that. Other people make them into it."

I refused to look away, I held his stare. "I can't wait for the end of you," Harry whispers, holding my sore face in his hand. Even though my eyes were droopy, I tried to keep them on his, refusing to give out in front of him. I don't know how much longer I can hold on.

"Y-You want to kill me?" My voice breaks, not because I'm scared but because I don't think I can take much more of this.

"No, I want to ruin you."

"We're done here," Harry says, walking further away. I feel like I can finally sleep in peace for the first time in days. "Knock her out," he commanded to Mr America and I don't get time to register it. Another fist collides with my cheek and that was the final blow, the icing on the cake before I'm out.

"That was for stepping on my shoe so hard," I hear Mr America mutter before the darkness swallowed me whole.

HARRY
STYLES

"You didn't have to hit her so hard," I mumbled, staring down at her body. "Well I needed to knock her out mate," Niall shrugged, shoving his hands in the ice bucket. Something about seeing her so hurt wanted me to punch through a concrete wall. I didn't know what to think of it.

"Take her home for me, yeah?" I say. Taking her apartment key from my pocket, I throw it at him and Niall catches it and slips it inside his front pocket. "Remi will be gone for an hour or two and I'll loop the security footage," I reminded him.

"Do you believe her?" He asks me and I don't have to think much about the answer because she convinced me a while ago. "Yes. She breaks easily and she would never protect someone over herself. Even if it's her father," I explained.

So then what's the explanation for all of this? How was her car used?

Niall nods his head without another word, he picks her up into his arms and I appreciate how careful he was. For whatever reason.

ESRIN
SAGE

I lied.

I lied and I'm still alive.

That is the first thought that hits me when my burning eyes parted and allowed the light to fill my vision. For minutes, I just stared at the tall ceiling of my penthouse. I'm home.

Slowly, I pushed my legs off the sofa and sat up. At the foot of it, my bag is there and sitting on the coffee table is my laptop in its case. I grabbed my bag, finding my phone in the pocket on the side where I left it. Turning it on, I only had one message and it was from Remi.

Remi:
Hey, I came in late and saw you asleep. Busy right now so I had to leave earlier this morning. Sandwich and tea in the kitchen for you.

How was I going to explain this? I'm sure I looked like hell, it doesn't sound like Remi took much interest in me for her to notice. I can't hide it though. With a sigh, I found Louis' contact and called him.

"Louis, I need you to tell Zayn that I can't make it in today," I tell him the second he picks up the phone. "Zayn? Oh, Mr Malik. Of course, Green Tea I will," I find comfort in the sound of his voice. "Is everything alright?" Louis wonders worriedly, I can tell.

"Yeah...yeah. Just do that for me," I reminded him one last time and then pressed the screen to end the phone call. The phone slips out of my hand and landed somewhere between the couch cushions.

How do I pretend as if none of that happened? It seems like I'm asking myself this every time and then something else happens. Now I believe something else is going to keep happening to the point I can't pretend anymore.

I hold up my hands, my wrists had a circle of raw blisters framed by red marks. Even around my ankles pained from the cuffs that were around them while I was kicking my feet. My throat felt swollen up, my chest- I can't even begin to describe it.

There's a new burning hatred that flames inside me for Harry. For Death Hood. I want to give him a taste of his own medicine. I want to take away his power. I want to ruin him. I will find a way to and now I'm more determined than ever. Breaking into his little Halloween store didn't work but I'll find another way.

Even if I have to get him to trust me for it to happen.

With that thought on my mind, I fell asleep with a small smile on my lips.

It's nice to easily fall asleep just like that but I hate what had to happen in order for my body to finally allow me to.

The annoying, consistent and blaring knocks pounding on my front door startled me from resting, shattering my slumber. I jolt off the couch, grabbing my blanket and wrapping it around me and I bolt to the door. The thought of taking a knife from the kitchen drawer crosses my mind but I don't. Unlocking it, Louis' worried eyes and fidgeting body is behind it.

He barely lets himself look at me, he walks into the penthouse and I shut the door, locking it. "Esrin! What the..." Louis' words died as he studies me longer, his tattooed hand lifting to touch my face as if he needed to make sure it was real but retreating when he realise it probably wasn't a good idea.

"I got beaten up last night...I stopped at the grocery store on the way home and..." The lie comes out so easily. Just like yesterday- or earlier. I have no idea when I was...interrogated. Or how long I fell back asleep.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry Green Tea," Louis frowns, the sadness is quite visible on his face. I could tell he was contemplating hugging me but he was afraid he would hurt me because hugging is Louis' go to thing. "Have you told Remi?" He asks, of course, he asks that because she's like my little secret weapon and advantage.

I thought I was a bad liar?
Convincing her is going to take more work than Louis. "I can't depend on her for everything...I can take care of myself," I tell him with a sigh. Louis nods his head. "I know but she works with police officers that can do something about it..." he softly reminds me.

I don't want him caught up in this. Hearing his name be threatened against me makes me regret being close to him. He can't be in this because of me and that applies to Remi as well.

"I will eventually do something about it but I need to rest first. I already took photos in case they heal too much before I get there," I lied. How am I going to convince Remi to not demand I make a report to catch these people is beyond me. It's something I have to figure out quickly though.

"Okay good...come on, you shouldn't be standing. Are you...hurt anywhere else?" He asks. He could only see my face and a bit of my neck because the rest of me was covered by the blanket.

"Actually, I haven't changed yet. I slept on the couch all night...I'm gonna take a quick shower," I tell him and then assured him he can sit in the living room area.

Carefully walking up the stairs, my eyes started watering for some reason when I saw my bedroom. So much has changed since the last time I was here. I dropped the blanket on the bed and gently slid my clothes off my body.

Now I've realised that Harry or Mr America hadn't returned my high heels or blazer. Instead, they handed me trauma and nightmares. Perfect.

I don't spend much time in the bathroom and after I changed into a comfortable pair of pyjamas even though it was around lunchtime. Louis decided to spend his lunchtime coming here. It was long enough to hide my wrists and ankles. Thankfully, I didn't have to cover up the bruises on my neck and they're already fading.

I lathered my skin with a lotion, being gentle on the parts that hurt. Sliding my feet into my fluffy slippers with cows on them, I made my way back downstairs.

A smile curves his lips with gentle eyes when they land on me. "You're not looking too great, Esrin...I'm worried," Louis softly says when I sat down. "I am too," I admitted, voice still feeling hoarse. I'm not okay mentally, physically and emotionally.

"I think you should take a visit to the doctor. Just to make sure everything is alright and maybe they'd give you ointment or something to help with the bruising," Louis suggests and a very valid point. "Plus, you don't have to tell them what happened if you don't want to," he adds.

"I will...later or tomorrow," I promised and meant it. "Did you tell Zayn I couldn't make it?" I asked him, the question had been on my mind since he came over. I hope that he did so I wouldn't have to talk to him right now. Louis nods his head," Well he wasn't too pleased that it came from me, yes." Relief.

With that, I scooted closer to him and Louis opens his arms. He holds me and even if it was just for a few minutes I was convinced that all the chaos can be tamed and broken pieces can be taped. Everything will be okay again. This broke off a few chips but I'm not destroyed.

Louis decides to stay the entire day until Remi gets home since he doesn't want me alone. I protested about it but there was no changing his mind. Sure Zayn might be pissed at me since he's smart enough to know Louis and I being absent wasn't a coincidence. But I didn't care, not right now anyway.

Later that day, he makes me food that's tender for my throat and doesn't push me to eat more when I've had enough. He lets me lean on him in a comforting way and lets me watch Beauty and the Beast with him.