"so it is a date."

yedam slightly smiled underneath his mask after recalling the words of the older brother of the boy who was walking next to him, seven feet away. the two were at a park and just walking around, enjoying the fresh air and the miles of green scenery that surrounded them. barely any words have been exchanged between the two ever since they left doyoung's dorm room building, but neither of them were complaining because words didn't need to be exchanged between the two of them to enjoy their time together. just being in each other's presence was enough.

the reason why seunghun's words caused yedam to smile was because the masked male didn't find it to be a bad idea; what the two of them were doing was similar to a date, after all, so he wasn't complaining one bit.

but maybe it was too soon to consider this a date. the two only met a month ago, and although yedam felt as if the two were pretty close now, the feeling may very much be platonic. it was possible that doyoung didn't think the same way as the masked male, and if that were the case, then the second year university student wouldn't want to make the younger uncomfortable.

just like they were now. the silence between them was, no doubt, awkward, but neither was deciding to do anything about it. yedam obviously didn't think this far, having many doubts that doyoung would've refused to hang out together at this moment. but the younger did agree, and despite the weird tension in the air, yedam was happy.

"you're brother seems nice," yedam decided to break the silence by saying something, although he really had nothing to talk about. doyoung let out a light hearted chuckle, the sound reaching yedam's ears and ringing in his head, drawing him more towards the sound of the first year university student's voice.

"if you take away all the teasing he does on a daily basis, then yeah, i guess," doyoung replied. "he's overprotective of me sometimes, wanting to square up with anyone who bothers me even the littlest bit, but that's just the way he shows how much he cares for me."

yedam nodded his head, understanding doyoung's feelings very well. jihoon was also very protective of the masked male, but mainly because of his allergy. "him and jihoon hyung would get along very well."

"you think so?" doyoung asked, obviously sounding happy at their siblings getting along. the masked male nodded his head to confirm his thinking. the older brothers of doyoung and yedam appeared to have a lot in common, the main similarity being that they were both overprotective of their younger brothers. the second year university student could already envision a conversation that jihoon may have with seunghun if the two ever meet, and you can bet that the conversation would include the younger two.

silence drew upon them once again, like a small fish bowl being filled up with new water. yedam wasn't a really big fan of the silence that always seemed to appear between them every time they were together for longer than five minutes, but he, himself, didn't know how to get rid of it.

yedam, if not obvious already, was a pretty shy boy, mainly because he had to be cautious of other people due to his allergy, but also because he didn't know if he would be able to trust that the people who come into his life would stay with him throughout. the masked male has had a lot of people leave him after finding out about his idiosyncrasy because they find it absolutely ridiculous and thought that yedam only wanted attention, which was not the case at all.

the second year university student first had doubts about doyoung, but they slowly began to fade as time passed. as the two kept talking more and more, yedam began to trust the younger and open up to him more. doyoung never once questioned yedam about his mask or the distance he was keeping between the two of them, and that was something he appreciated. the masked male knew that the younger was curious; even yedam himself would be curious if he was in doyoung's shoes. but the second year university student felt that because the younger didn't question him about anything, the other was around him not to find out about why he was wearing a mask, but because he genuinely wanted to be around him.

at least, that's what yedam hoped.

yedam laid down in the grass, putting his hands behind his head to give it some support. doyoung followed his gesture, resting his hands on his stomach as he laid on the opposite side of yedam down by his feet. the heads of the two boys were facing opposite directions, their feet meeting in the middle and touching each other through their shoes.

this was one way for the two boys to still be far apart, yet close together at the same time. the combination of their heights allowed the second year university student to be far enough away from doyoung to not smell the suffocating scent of baby powder, but the two were still close enough to feel each other's presence and physically be with each other.

even though it was only their feet that were touching, through their shoes at that, yedam could feel the warmth radiating from doyoung. he felt his cheeks start to heat up, but the masked male claimed that it was the heat of the sun outside that was causing the warmth coursing through his veins.

silence was present between the two, as it always is. however, unlike earlier that day, this silence was comfortable. yedam had his eyes closed and was just taking in the freshness of the weather outside and the cool breeze that flew through his hair and clothes, contrasting the warmth of the sun outside and making the weather perfect.

this peacefulness had remained for about ten minutes, not a word being exchanged between the two males, until doyoung asked a question to yedam that caught him by surprise.

"hyung," the younger of the two started, opening his previously closed eyes and looking at the branches of the tree that hung above them. "i never got to ask about the meaning behind the notes on the sticky notes that you left behind with the strawberry milk."

although taken off guard by the sudden, unexpected question, yedam smiled underneath his mask. doyoung mentioning the sticky notes on the strawberry milk brought the second year university student back to the time that they both met, in the library after yedam was caught giving the milk to the younger while he was taking a nap. from there, the bond between them slowly began to grow to become what it is now, and with the growing relationship between the two university students, yedam doesn't regret giving the strawberry milk to doyoung that day, not like he ever did.

"when i saw you that day, sleeping on the picnic table just outside the boundaries of the campus and later that day inside the library, you looked very tired. you had huge eye bags under your eyes and it just looked like you were physically and mentally exhausted and frustrated from something. your resting face was scrunched up, like you had a bad thought right before you fell asleep," yedam began explaining, reminiscing the moments back from a month ago when he had first met doyoung.

after receiving no word from the younger, the masked male took this as his cue to continue speaking. "i thought that you might've needed something to give you energy to get through the rest of the day, and i was reminded of myself. whenever i get too tired or stressed from studying, i would always drink strawberry milk to help bring my energy back, so i thought that maybe it could help you as well.

"the notes written on the paper... there wasn't really any further meaning underneath them. it was just something that i hoped would help you get through the day, and the next day, and the day after that. originally i was planning to only do it once, but as i kept passing by you everyday at the same picnic table, i found myself doing it everyday for a week, until you caught me."

"how did you know i was going through something?" doyoung followed up yedam's explanation with a question. "i could've just been tired from sleeping late at night doing homework or staying on my phone for too long."

although doyoung wouldn't see, the masked male shook his head, that was still resting on his hands, and let out a small sigh. "it didn't look like you were just tired. you looked so out of it and exhausted."

silence fell upon the two once again, neither of them knowing what to say next. a question lingered in the mind of the second year university student, but he didn't know if it was okay for him to ask about it. the question was something that yedam never really thought too much about before, since it wasn't important during the time, but now, after holding this much needed conversation with doyoung, the masked male couldn't help himself.

"what made you so exhausted for you to sleep on the picnic table and the library everyday?"

a few minutes with no answer followed up, and yedam felt like he had hit a nail that wasn't supposed to be hit. turns out, the reason wasn't simple, such as being too stressed about school or being overflowed with homework. there was more to that, and yedam could sense that from the growing tension between the two.

the masked male suddenly wished that he hadn't asked. he didn't know it was a really big deal, and even if it wasn't as big as yedam made it out to be, the younger's silence still didn't fail to make the other feel guilty and worried at the same time.

"i..."

a word coming from doyoung's mouth caught yedam's attention, and he was once again focusing his attention on the other, escaping his thoughts that threatened to distract him.

"i've... been having trouble sleeping at night, and if i do fall asleep, i'm not able to stay asleep..." the first year university student seemed hesitant, as if he were reluctant to tell yedam about what was going on in his life. the masked male could feel the debate that doyoung was having with himself on whether or not to tell the older male.

it appeared to yedam that the first year university student decided to tell him about what was going on in his life because doyoung continued to talk after a couple minutes of transitory silence formed between the two of them. "my mom... she's trying to fight lung cancer right now..."

yedam shot up from his laying position and scooted back, keeping mind of the distance that he had unknowingly established between the two of them since their first meeting, and looked at doyoung, who slowly lifted himself up from the grass and did the same, now creating six feet between them instead of seven.

that distance was perfectly fine for yedam. it was far enough so that yedam wouldn't hyperventilate due to the baby powder scent, and it was still close enough to hold a strong conversation with each other. however, it wasn't like either of the two boys were focused on their current distance because if that were the case, yedam knew that doyoung would scoot back at least another foot to keep their established distance.

"i'm... sorry..." the masked male felt guilty for bringing up a sensitive topic, or at least, something that would be sensitive to him if he was in the younger's shoes. yedam's mom and dad had gotten a divorce for a reason still unknown to the masked male, and now he has two dads. sure, there were some things in his life that he wished would go away, such as the bullying and possibly his allergy despite coming terms to it already, but his life is as perfect as it can be.

"you didn't do anything wrong. there's no reason to apologize."

"i brought up a sensitive topic, didn't i?" the second year university student asked. he didn't mean to bring up something so personal and possibly sensitive, thus, the reason for his apology.

"i wouldn't say that you did... but i wouldn't say that you didn't either. i've already come to terms with the fact that my mom has lung cancer, but at the same time, i guess i haven't..."

although it didn't make sense to yedam, that wasn't the main focus of the situation. the only thing that mattered at the moment was doyoung's situation. he gave his full attention to the younger, wanting to make up for bringing up a sensitive topic that the other possibly didn't want to talk about.

"i visit my mom often at the hospital. every other day, to be specific. seunghun hyung goes on the days that i don't go, so we basically alternate between days. today was his day to visit, and he's probably already there now..." the younger male's voice died down at the end, and yedam got a feeling that maybe he didn't want to talk about it.

"you don't have to tell me if it makes you uncomfortable," the masked male said, but the other boy just shook his head.

"its okay. i'm not complaining or anything," doyoung said, assuring the older of any doubts he might have. that didn't work so well because the masked male still had many, many doubts, but he decided to let them go and focus on the moment at hand.

once silence filled up between the two of them again, the first year university student began talking once more, crushing the freezing ice that was starting to grow. "i have trouble falling and staying asleep at night because i'm scared. i'm scared and worried that if i close my eyes tonight, something might happen to my mom, and i won't be there to help or do anything. i'm constantly scared and worried, even throughout the day, but it gets exceptionally worse at night when the hospital is almost empty. if something happens to my mom, there will be no one there to help her.

"seunghun hyung is the same way as me, uneasy and worried, but he's more at ease than me since he already came to terms about the possible outcome of my mom's situation. there's only one result, and he's already accepted it, but i can't bring myself to fully get a grasp on the situation."

more silence filled in the space between them while doyoung took a breath. yedam should hear the unevenness in the other's breathing as he could see him trying to hold back his tears. wishing he could give him a hug, but not being able to, the masked male only found himself being able to sit there silently and wait for doyoung to continue on.

"if..." doyoung paused. the second year university student could see the conflict in the other's eyes, possibly debating on whether to say what he wanted to say next. doyoung changed his words with the next line that came from his mouth, slightly catching the older off guard.

"when... she's gone... there's no one else left. it would only be me and seunghun hyung. it hurts so much to think about it, but i can't help it. not being able to sleep at night, having trouble staying asleep, having constant nightmares... its all from thinking too much, but there's nothing i can do except bare with it..."

from that point, a tear made its way down doyoung's cheek. it didn't go unnoticed by the masked male, but the younger wiped it away quickly, acting as if he was fine by showing a bright smile to yedam, a smile that was obviously forced, as the older could see.

"but its all okay. it was bound to happen anyway. i don't know why i'm making it a big deal when the ending was inevitable since the beginning. i mean... its not like i didn't know my entire life after my mom kept dropping hints. ha... i feel stupid and weak for crying over som-"

the masked male lost it. hearing doyoung blab his mouth about how the situation was okay made yedam lose his mind. even if the ending was inevitable, it didn't mean that it wouldn't hurt. it was the first year university student's mom they were talking about. nothing passes by easily when it involves a family member, especially if its a close family member.

at that point, the second year university student didn't care about his allergy. he didn't care if something went wrong with what he was about to do. it didn't matter to him if he hyperventilated at the moment because all he could think of doing was giving the younger a hug, a hug that doyoung desperately needed, and the masked male knew that.

yedam held his breath and dived towards doyoung mid sentence, wrapping his arms around his neck while sitting on top of his crossed legs and pulling him close, burying the younger's face into his chest as the other began letting his tears fall freely. the first year university student's arms instinctively wrapped around the older's waist, bringing him closer as he began to cry harder.

the masked male was glad at this moment for his large lung capacity because it allowed him to embrace doyoung for a couple minutes before he would have to separate. using his right hand, he ran his fingers through doyoung's hair, feeling the softness of it for the first time, as he tried to calm the younger boy down.

the two stayed like that until yedam had lost his breath, lightly tapping doyoung's arm over his sleeve to tell him to let go. getting up and moving to a good distance, the masked male spent about twelve seconds to catch his breath before making his way to doyoung once more and embracing him the same way he had earlier.

this went on for about ten minutes until doyoung was able to calm down. after that, the younger immediately established their seven feet boundary after coming back to his senses, and yedam couldn't deny that he was kind of upset.

not because of doyoung moving back to get the distance between them; the masked male felt that it was very much needed since the constant back and forth motion and restriction of his breathing had caused yedam to somewhat lose his breath. but he was upset because he wasn't able to embrace doyoung anymore. although he was comforting the other, the warmth radiating from the younger to the second year university student himself still lingered on his body, and he wanted to keep feeling it. he was addicted to it. he wanted more of it.

sadly, yedam wasn't able to get what he wanted because the two decided to end their "date" there. then again, the masked male probably shouldn't be upset because he's the one who chose to end it, telling the younger that he should get home and try to get some rest, even if it was a little bit. yedam was able to see the disappointment in the other's face when he suggested that they end the day there, but doyoung agreed nonetheless.

splitting their ways and heading back to their respective homes, yedam looked back on his day with doyoung, and although not much had happened, he had very much enjoyed spending time with the first year university student. he hoped that they could do something like this again, since talking and walking around brought the two of them closer.

and the hug had confirmed yedam's confusing feelings, the warmth still lingering.

[YEDAM]