Ten

I did not move, I was too exhausted from what we did several minutes ago. I could tell she feels the same because she remained in a fetal position as I wrapped my arms around her body.

My eyes landed on a small text on her ribs. "Memento veveire..." I didn't realized I mused it out loud because her big black eyes fluttered open and gaze upon me.

"Oh." She blinked a few times, obviously disrupted from her sleep. Namamaga ang mga mata niya sa kakaiyak. I suddenly wanted to punch myself when I came to realize that I did nothing but wipe her tears. That's all I could do.

A half smile tugged on her lips. "It's a latin word. It means remember, you must live."

I cocked both of my eyebrows. "Is this Are dude the one who suggested it? Siya rin ang may gawa niyan?"

The green-haired beauty shook her head slightly. Honestly, when I first saw her I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. In well-kept black hair, fair complexion, and pale lips that she'd been sporting the last time I saw her, she looked really fragile and weak. But now in her inks and lucite green hair, she looked really bold and fearless. Like nothing could stop her. Well, except for her big sad eyes. It's still the same. She's still sad despite the sudden change of appearance. But it gives me hope everytime I see the sparkle on her eyes whenever she's doing the thing that she loves.

"Yes and no." She licked her lips before speaking again and I couldn't tear my gaze away from it. My groin tightened. She's seducing me without even realizing it. Her effects on me is just so fucking overwhelming that I couldn't keep my hands or eyes off her. "I learned the term when I was writing the book. Then I couldn't get it off my mind and Are suggested to paste it permanently on my skin."

Gumapang ang mga daliri ko sa maliit na buwang nakaukit sa kanyang balat. "You know what? I think I'll have this tattoo."

Her face immediately lit up. "Really?"

"Yes. But it would be a sun." I decided. I smiled cheekily at her. "How's that?"

"That'd be great." Her eyes sparkled in enthuasiasm. She started telling me stories of her first tattoo experience with Are and how she almost messed it up. Her lips continue to move but my eyes remained on her beautiful orbs. Oh fuck it. I know I wouldn't get enough of the passionate look on Mary Grace's face whenever she talks about things she likes the most. "When would you like to have it?"

I hugged her closer and kissed her temple. "As soon as possible." I murmured on her forehead.

"Maybe I could talk to Are when he comes back here." She wandered out loud and giggled a little. "Oh, I'm so excited! Are would be pleased to meet you and to think na gusto mo pang magpa-tattoo."

Anything for you Mary Grace, anything.

The late morning sunlight streamed through her windows and as much as I wanted to tie her on bed and tangle my legs with her all day, she claimed that she has to work in the cafe. We took a shower together against her better judgement.

I wanted to see every inch of her. There's nothing to hide, Mary Grace. I'm so fucking selfish for wanting all of her and I also wanted her to feel comfortable on her own skin. I didn't have any idea of what it feels like being raped but I know for a fact that it caused her a lot of insecurities and questioning her self-worth. And I'm determined to remove it all by getting comfortable on each other's skins.

Nang makapagbihis ay sabay kaming lumabas. Naglakad kami papunta ng cafe, hand in hand. The AJ dude sat on the front porch, reading a newspaper with his coffee at his side. Nagtama ang mga mata naming dalawa. A scowl automatically appeared on my face and my arms possessively wrapped around my girl's waist. Iniwas naman niya ang tingin at bumuntong-hininga. I know I am being stubborn, but I don't want any guy to look at my girl like that.

"AJ!" Mary Grace beamed. "Kumain ka na? Mga alas onse ng tanghali ay darating na ang bus." Bumagsak ang tingin niya sa traveling bag ni AJ na nakapatong din sa lamesa. A sad smile crept on her lips. "Sayang at aalis ka na."

The guy smiled genuinely. If only Mary Grace knew how much she radiates of sunshine and bliss on people around her. "Oo nga eh. Wala naman akong magagawa kasi nasa Davao ang buhay ko."

Tumango-tango si Mary Grace. "I know. I'm going to visit you in Davao soon."

"Ikaw lang?" I protested. I couldn't help the little growl from vibrating in my throat.

Parehong tumawa si Mary Grace at AJ. Mas lalo akong sumimangot.

She pinched my nose. "Okay, it's the two of us."

AJ grinned widely. "Sure. I'd be expecting you guys some time this year."

"Oo naman, ikaw pa!" She winked at him that made my scowl deepened on my face as I followed her inside the cafe. Her manager, Nilo, eyed the two of us disapprovingly. Nagkamot ng ulo si Mary Grace. "I'm sorry, I'm a little late."

Her eyes squeezed my arms. Binalingan niya ako tapos iginala ang paningin sa halos wala pang laman na karihan. Itinuro niya ang lamesa sa may bintana. "Doon ka muna maghintay, ayos lang? Kailangan kong tumulong sa kusina eh. O kung gusto mo kausapin mo nalang si AJ."

I snorted. "I'd rather sit alone."

She rolled my eyes at my stubborness. "You're such a kid." Then she slid inside the counter. I watched her wrapped a black apron around her trimmed waist. She raise an eyebrow at me and practically shoved me away to leave her alone.

Tinatamad akong nagtungo sa lamesang itinuro niya. I watched her slip out of the kitchen every once in a while as the cafe gathered their customers. Soon, there was a crowd inside the coffee shop. Most tourists spend their hours inside the establishment when it's too hot to enjoy the beach or explore the cape.

I watched Mary Grace served orders after orders. I still couldn't believe it. I know how much she loved brewery, judging from the way she adored Karlo's way back years ago. Up until now I kept my mouth shut about the old man's deteriorating condition. Bumabalik-balik pa rin ako sa cafe but the last time I've been there, his son told me he's in the hospital. And that was a couple of months ago before I went to Palawan and then straight to Davao.

I sighed. I'm sure Mary Grace misses him. She really knows how to work her way around elderly people. Napansin kong malapit din siya sa matandang babae na nagmamay-ari ng cafe na ito.

A glass of iced coffee with whipped cream snapped me out of my thoughts. Sinundan ko ng tingin ang kamay na naglapag nito sa lamesa. Mary Grace smiled down at me.

"You might want to enjoy this while you wait."

Inilapit ko ang straw sa aking bibig at sumimsim. My eyes sparkled in delight. "This is great." I grunted.

She winked at me. I groaned once inside of my head once more. I really like it when she finds her confidence around people. "Be back." She smiled sweetly as she sauntered over tables to get back inside the counter.

Nang sa wakas ay matapos na and shift ni Mary Grace ay niyaya niya akong magpunta sa Brgy. Pundaguitan. It's the barangay next to where the cape is located and it's a few kilometers away. Ang sabi niya ay kailangan niyang mamili ng karne at iba pang ingredients para sa lulutuin nila bukas. She also said that there might be cellular signal once we reach the barangay.

"Talaga? Ayos lang sa iyo?" She blinked at me when I agreed to walk our way towards the barangay. I've passed it when I got here. It's a pretty good routine to walk when you want to break a good sweat.

"Yes." I nodded my head and stuffed my hands inside my black shorts. "Besides, we don't have a choice. You said Mang Anton will not arrive until an hour or so, right?"

Natigilan siya na para bang iniisip kung ano ang tamang gawin. Then she heaved a sigh. "Yeah, you're right. Gagabihin tayo kung hindi tayo aalis ngayon." Iginala niya ang paningin. Then she waved over a guy who just emerged out of the cafe. "Jason! Aalis na kami!" sigaw niya.

The guy nodded at her before he padded himself to the nearest store to buy a cigarette. He lazily drag the stick from his mouth as he watched us walk down the empty road.

I slip my hands with Mary Grace's as we walked in silence, the swaying of palm trees and the distant hum of the waves crushing into the shore were the only noise we could hear. I always picture myself living a life with my wife in a province or a small village. It'll be great to pull myself out from the crowded city and the pollution. I want my kids to play around with dogs and trees instead of computers and gadgets.

It seems like Mary Grace had been enjoying the silence as well. A small smile never left her lips as we walk slowly, passing small huts every now and then. The sun is starting to sink beyond the horizon and a thick fog circled the top of a hill just before us. I wished my sister or Clarisse is here to witness this magnificent view. The poor little girl haven't got a chance to witness a scenery like this because her mother can't take her anywhere because of work. Ang mga day off naman niya'y iginugugol niya sa pagpupunta ng bar, acting a single lady who didn't have a kid.

"Harry..." mahinang sambit ni Mary Grace. Nilingon ko kaagad siya. But she's staring straight ahead on the road which seems to stretch endlessly. The only landmark I remembered that indicates the Brgy. Pundaguitan is the small bus terminal and the public market.

"Yeah?" I tightened my grip on her. Iniiwas niya pa rin ang tingin sa akin na para bang nagdadalawang-isip sa kung ano man ang gusto niyang sabihin.

"I just wanted to ask...something." she said meekly.

"Ask anyway." I encouraged her. The green strands of hair sticking to her forehead tempts me to stroke it away from framing her beautiful face. She chewed on her lips, something she always do whenever she's hesitant or afraid.

"What was it like with Ate Annie?" mahina niyang tanong.

Her question actually surprised me. Buti nalang at hindi ako napatigil sa paglalakad. I thought she'd ask about what happened with the investigation but she's discreetly avoiding the subject.

"Well..." I said, not knowing what to start. I shrugged my shoulders. "Do you really want to hear the truth?"

She nodded her head hesitantly.

"Okay." I silently answered as I let the memories of Annie flood back inside of my mind. "I think she's not really inlove with me." simula ko. It was her turn to get surprised. Napatingin na siya sa wakas sa akin habang patuloy pa rin kami sa paglalakad.

"What do you mean?" her black eyes widen as she frantically searched for answer on my eyes.

I scrunched. "I don't really knew why I stick around with her for over three years. I'm not saying this to make you feel better just because I'm dating you. I'm saying this to tell you the truth. Annie is so distant. We might have look like your average couple but in fact, we lack communication. I always get the silent treatment with her." I keep on remembering the countless dinners we've had that neither of us had talked to each other. Or the times when she pretended I wasn't around their home and locked herself inside her room. Maybe that was one of the reasons Mr. Ferguson talked to me about things. He must've noticed that his daughter is ignoring me like I'm a piece of trash.

Soon enough, I'd visit their house not because of Annie anymore but because of her father's anticipation and her mother's great cookies. I see Mary Grace occassionally but her eyes is always glued on the floor. I've seen her emerged from her room upstairs countless times, sometimes with a smile on her face and sometimes with red puffy eyes from crying.

"Paanong nangyari yun?" nalilitong tanong ni Mary Grace sa akin.

I smiled gently at her. "As what I've said, I really had no idea. At first, I thought I was madly inlove with her. I found the ideal girl I'd like to be my wife." I noticed the way she tensed when I uttered the words, but I continued anyway. "Annie is beautiful, intelligent, and bold. However, what she lacks is compassion, communication, and most of all—self-love. I think she's too consumed with whatever it is that's hunting her she decided to create her own little world."

I chuckled bitterly when I voiced out my thoughts. "Sometimes, I'd come into conclusion that she only dated me because she wanted to appear normal to most people."

I glanced at her to see her reaction. She nibbled on her lower lips. I know for a fact na hindi pa rin kami nangangalahati sa destinasyon namin but I'm glad to use this walking session so I could talk to her about her sister.

"Eventually, my love for her faded. Nasanay na ako na hindi niya ako pinapansin. We only stick with each oher because we knew we needed each other. I felt the urge to stand by her side no matter what happens, kahit na wala naman na akong nararamdaman para sa kanya. I just wanted to protect her, that's all. And I know I miserably failed when she killed herself. Maybe the love I thought I had for her wasn't enough. It left me frustrated."

"That's when you started seeing me." she murmured.

"Yes, baby. And please forgive me for doing it. Gusto ko lang maintindihan si Annie. She did not marked a deep scar nor wound in my heart but she left a gaping hole. Na para bang hindi ako matatahimik kapag hindi ko nalaman kung ano talaga ang nangyari sa kanya. I wanted to at least do something for her dahil alam kong nasaktan ko din siya."

Tumango-tango si Mary Grace. God knows how much I feel about this woman. I never felt the adrenaline rush, the deep pain, the overwhelming emotions, and feelings whenever I'm with her than when I'm with Annie. I thought after a few good talks with her I'll leave her alone but she managed to draw me closer without even exerting an effort. And I'm glad I dragged myself into her life. Even if the road is rougher than what I had expected.

"You know what?"

"What?" She scrunched her cute little nose and sneezed. I chuckled. She looked like a kid.

"I learned a lot about falling in love when I fell out of love with Annie."

She gave me a crook smile but did not respond. We just keep on walking, the skin on my fingertips lightly brushing her warm skin.

The small terminal and the public market finally came into view after about half an hour. Tahimik na kaming naglakad hanggang sa makarating kami. I helped her do her errands of buying vegetables and meat. Napansin kong halos lahat ng mga tindero ay kakilala na niya. She smiled so genuinely at them. I never saw her smile like that when we were still in Pampanga. She's either looking down or crying or pretending to be a normal human being that takes no shit at all.

Gabi na nang matapos kami sa pamimili. We decided to ride a tricycle back to the cape. Mary Grace also bought some food to store inside her small fridge.

We were both exhausted when we entered her room. She slumped on her black bean bag and watched me as I placed the items on top of the table.

"I'm going to cook something." I announced.

Both her eyebrows lifted up in amusement. "Oh? What're you going to cook?"

I gave her a cocky smile. "It's for me to know and for you to discover, Your Highness."

She threw her head back and laugh. Then she dragged herself lazily up from the couch and grabbed a towel. "Maliligo lang ako."

"Need a hand?" I teased.

Sinapak niya ako. My temple throbbed. She must've thought it was playful but she's stronger—physically—than what she thinks she is. Hindi ko nalang pinahalata na nasaktan ako.

I watched her slip inside the bathroom. Then I started sorting out the ingredients, halfway through the process, I lifted my shirt over my head because I started sweating. Binuksan ko ang pintuan at mga bintana upang pumasok ang hangin dahil nagsisimula nang uminit.

After a little while, Mary Grace emerged from the bathroom, her hair dripping wet. Her cheeks are flushed and her thick eyebrows are darker than usual. The tattoo also glistened on her damp skin. I stared at her for a while, silently appreciating the beauty that she is.

Her face scrunched up. "What are you looking at? You perv!" She grabbed the nearest pillow and threw it at me. Tumawa kaming dalawa. I return to cooking as she rummage through her wardrobe. When I turned around, she's already in her flannel pajamas. And I never knew that tattoos and flannel pajamas can look so good together until I saw her.

"Hmmm, what could you be cooking?" she sang as she ran a hairbrush through her wet hair.

I just smiled at her. Lumapit siya sa akin habang binubuhos ko ang laman ng sinigang mix. She inhaled and dropped the comb, wrapping her arms around my torso. I tensed up.

"Something wrong?" I asked worriedly.

She slightly shook her head. Nanatili siyang nakayakap nang ilang minuto.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah." She mumbled behind me. "Just glad you're here."

My body relaxed. Inubos ko muna ang sinigang mix bago ko siya hinarap. I cupped her cheeks. "Hey, that's okay. I'm always going to be here. You need to do a better job getting rid of me." I chuckled.

She slapped my chest slightly. "You idiot." Then she pulled away and blink back her tears as if I couldn't see it. "Tapusin mo na yan, sa labas lang ako." She headed out the door with her wet hair still a mess. Napailing nalang ako at pinagpatuloy ang pagluluto.

After a couple of minutes, I glanced at her outside. She's sitting on top of the banister, her feet swinging back and forth. Pinahinaan ko ang apoy at nilapitan siya.

"Hey."

She teared her gaze away from the dark sea and turned at me. She smiled widely. "Hey. Tapos ka na?"

"Just a couple of minutes and it'd be ready." I leaned my body against the railings as I soak in the beautiful view before us. It's not a surprise that Mary Grace couldn't leave this cape. It offers a magnificent view day and night. Who wouldn't miss it for the world?

"What's that?" I wondered when I saw a white light blinking several times in the middle of the sea.

Mary Grace squinted her eyes. "T-h-a-n-k Y-o-u. Thank you. Oh, it's thanking us."

"Huh?" kumunot ang noo ko.

"Maybe it's a lost tug or something. Marami na akong nakitang ganyan. The lighthouse still serves sailors all throughout these years. I suppose it's not from the Philippines."

"You know how to read light signals?" I asked, quite amazed.

"Yeah." She nodded her head enthusiastically. "Grand Ida taught me how. It's really cool. There was a time when we actually answered a ship when it started sending us distressed signals..."

I watched her mouth moved and her wet hair dripped with water as she threw her head back and laughed, recalling the events of her story. Her words somehow drifted away and all I could see is her. A crook smiled crept up on my lips. Ibang-iba na siya.

She's not lowering her gaze anymore and there's a different sparkle in her eyes. Mary Grace had gone through hell and back and yet, she's still standing right before me, telling me tales of how the lighthouse saved sailors and how she loved the Pacific ocean every morning. She smell of sand and salt, of brewed coffee and cakes, and she danced barefoot I couldn't help my heart from squeezing because of too much enthusiasm.

Mary Grace. You're one heck of a girl.

"Harry?"

I snapped out of my thoughts, blinking several times. "Huh?"

"You idiot, you're not listening." She slapped me again on the chest. I chuckled and asked for an apology as she huffed and crossed her arms over her chest like a kid. I couldn't help but laughing.

She's too happy right now. I don't want to steal her happiness. Ayoko munang sabihin sa kanya ang nalalaman ko. If I could, I would stop the fucking time so I can stretch her happiness and prevent her from being inflicted with pain. She had too much.

She doesn't deserve this. Oh God, she's too beautiful, and strong, and passionate she doesn't deserve me either.