Four

I woke up feeling dizzy. The first thing that I saw is a fluorecsent lamp pulsing faint light that is mounted to the white ceiling just above me. After a few seconds, I heard someone shouted.

"Ma, ningmata na siya!" (Ma, gising na po siya!). It's a voice of a young boy, but I didn't get to see him because he disappeared before I could adjust my eyes to the surroundings.

My throat feels dry as Sahara. My whole body feels weak as well. I lifted myself up despite the cry of my body and looked around my surroundings. I suppose I am inside some hospital's emergency room. There are three empty hospital beds that are situated next to me.

A tired-looking woman who seems to be in her late 40's appeared inside the room. Her eyes shone with delight when she saw me.

"Thank God, He finally answered my prayers. Gising ka na!" Lumapit siya sa akin at kaagad na hinawakan ang kamay ko. I flinched at the coldness of her frail hands.

"Nasaan ako?" Basag ang boses kong tanong.

"Davao Doctors Hospital." She immediately replied. "Niligtas mo si Julie, hindi ko alam kung paano kita pasasalamatan." Tears started to form in her eyes but she blinked it back and smiled at me. "Tapos nawalan ka ng malay nang makalabas na kayo. They said it was because of suffocation. Alalang-alala ako sa iyo."

I wrecked my brain for a long time, keeping my mouth shut. Yes, I remember. May sumabog sa loob ng mall while I was inside the grocery store. Nagsitakbuhan ang mga tao papalabas ng mall. I was about to do the same thing when I heard a little girl cried. She's lost and looking for her mother. I lifted her up without hesitation and did my best to escape the fire with her.

Then I lost my consciousness the moment I got out of the mall. But I swear, in the few moments before I closed my eyes, I saw the woman I had been looking for.

Mary Grace.

She looked just as terrible as I am. Nakatayo lang siya at nakatingin sa akin. I couldn't recognize the sudden change of her hair color and there are black lines dancing on the sleeve of her arms which suspiciously looks like a permanent tattoo to me. Even with her appearance, I know that it was her.

It was really her. I finally found her.

"Or did I?" I wondered out loud, earning a confused expression from the woman in front of me. I cleared my throat and offered her a tight smile. "Harry nga po pala ang pangalan ko."

She nodded her head. "Ako si Jane. This is my other kid, Julius. Si Julia naman ay nagpapahinga pa rin hanggang ngayon."

"How long had I been out?"

"Almost 16 hours." She said. Napatingin kaming dalawa sa screen ng TV. One of the nurse increased the volume and all eyes were focused on the footage of NCCC mall still on fire. Hindi pa rin nila napapatay ang sunog.

My heart sank inside of my chest.

"Hindi ka taga Davao, hijo?" She queried.

Marahan kong itinango ang ulo ko. "Taga Pampanga po ako. I went here to find...someone. My family is situated in Pampanga. Which reminds me..." nagpalinga-linga ako para hanapin ang bag ko. I know for a fact that it's still swung over my shoulders when I managed to get out of the mall.

Mukhang nahulaan ni Ms. Jane ang hinahanap ko. Binitawan niya ang kamay ko at tumayo. I watched her open the drawer on the bedside table and pulled out my bag. I sighed in relief.

Iniabot niya ito sa akin. I immediately fished out my phone and found 70 miss calls from my sister, 2 text messages from my Dad, and 20 missed calls from Roxanne.

I hit the answer back button on Ate Pinky's number. After the first ring she immediately pick up.

"WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?"

I winced at her loud voice. Iniwan muna ako saglit ni Ms. Jane kasama ang anak niya to give me some privacy. I shifted on my bed in a comfortable position but I'm still aching. Every part of my body is throbbing. Parang gusto kong mapamura sa sakit.

"I'm in Davao."

"I know, you idiot!" She snarled back. "I heard about the fire. Nasa loob ka ba ng mall nung mangyari yun?"

"Yes—"

"What happened?" I could hear the frustration laced on her voice.

"As you can see, I'm still alive otherwise I would not be talking to you over the phone right now." I remarked sarcastically.

"Oh, yeah." She sounded as if realization just hit her.

"Ate Pinky."

"Yes?"

"I found her." Kaagad siyang tumahimik sa kabilang linya. As soon as I graduated in college, I did not bother to look for a job and started searching for Mary Grace. Iyon ang napagkasunduan namin ni Dad. Kailangan ko munang makapagtapos bago ako umalis. The CCTV caught her footage climbing out of the taxi and disappearing behind the brick wall of the gate. I also found her phone near the area but she's nowhere to be found.

Hinanap ko siya kung saan-saan. God knows how Mr. Ferguson rejected my help numerous times whenever I showed up at their house. Ilang beses na din akong nasuntok sa mukha. They didn't look very good. It seems like the family is in chaos, up until now.

Ate Pinky exclaimed a series of curses on the other line before she spoke up again. "Saan? Nagkausap na ba kayo? God, Harry. You need to bring this girl here as soon as possible. I need to talk to her."

"Woman," I corrected. "She changed a lot, Ate. She..." I don't even know how to describe her. "Her hair is in a weird color of green, you know? Like seafoam..." I wondered out loud. "And her right arm. I thought I saw some ink."

"Ink?!" She shrieked. "Sigurado ka bang siya ang nakita mo? Si Mary Grace talaga yun?" Hindi nito makapaniwalang tanong sa akin.

"Yes, I'm positive. It was just a brief moment but I am certain that it was her. I know her."

Natahimik si Ate Pinky sa kabilang linya. Then I heard her sigh over the long distance hum generated by the phone. "And you lost her again?"

"No." I immediately answered. "I'm not going to lose her again. I finally found her. Ngayon pa ba ako titigil?"

"So, you're going to search the entire Davao City for her?" I could hear the muffled whining of Clarisse in the background. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng matinding pangungulila sa bata. I couldn't even remember the last time I showed up at the house. My life these past two years had been spent sleeping in uncomfortable motels and exploring unfamiliar places in search for Mary Grace.

"Ate Pinky, wherever she is in the world, I'm going to search for her." I said in firm determination. "I'm going to find her."

"You better do." Hanggang ngayon ay nagi-guilty pa rin si Ate Pinky. She thinks that Mary Grace ran away because of what she said to me that she accidentally overheard. I didn't had a chance to explain things to her because she disappeared and I spent my life searching for her ever since.

"Sige Ate, I'm going to rest first. Bukas magsisimula na ulit ako sa paghahanap."

"Okay." She replied. "Goodluck, Harry."

"Thanks." I muttered before hanging up. A nurse strode inside the room and announced that she's going to check my blood pressure. I relaxed back into my bed as my mind started wandering about Mary Grace..

---

"Sigurado ka ba, hijo?" Tanong sa akin ni Ms. Jane for the nth time.

I nodded my head. I look for my wallet and decided to buy something if I ever saw a grocery mart nearby before I start wandering the city.

"Opo. Kailangan ko na pong umalis eh." I said then I glanced at Julie. I smiled at her and ruffled her hair. "Magpagaling ka nang maayos, okay?"

Marahang tumango ang bata. Bakas pa rin sa mukha niya ang takot. Sobrang bata pa niya para maranasan ang ganoong klase ng sitwasyon. I turned to Ms. Jane and smiled politely at her.

"Sana magkita pa tayo ulit." Wika ni Ms. Jane. "Hindi ko alam kung paano kita pasasalamatan sa ginawa mo sa anak ko."

I waved my hands dismissively. "It's nothing, really. Anyone who had seen Julie will do the same thing." Then I swung my backpack over my shoulder. "Well, I guess this is goodbye. Until we meet again, Ms. Jane."

"Goodbye." She said and waved her hand. I strode casually out of the large hospital and looked around. People are pacing around everywhere in a hurry. December 24. Magpapasko na mamaya and here I am, clueless and lost in a large city. I don't even know where to start looking.

I decided to dine in KFC in an attempt to create a plan but I failed miserably. Hindi ko alam kung papaano ko siya hahanapin. So I just stick with what I have been doing for years. I pulled out her photo and started asking people around if they had seen this girl.

But I know my chances are slim because she already changed her hair and had even gotten a tattoo. Some people may not recognize her anymore if they happened to know Mary Grace. Bumalik ako sa nasusunog na mall. I asked BFP officers around but they all ignored me. They were all busy putting out the fire and attending victims.

A cop eyed me warily. I immediately approached him and held out the picture.

"Excuse me, Sir. Have you seen this girl?"

Kinuha niya ang litrato. He squinted his eyes.

"She was one of the survivors from yesterday." I supplied. A flare of hope erupted into my chest when recognition flashed across his face.

"You mean, the girl with green hair and tattoo?"

"Yes, yes!" I answered eagerly. Kulang nalang ay pumalakpak ang mga tainga ko sa narinig.

"Yeah, I saw her yesterday." He placed his hands on his chin as if he's in deep thought.

I swallowed. My heart couldn't stop pumping fast inside of my chest. "And do you know where she is right now?"

He shook his head that made my shoulders slumped. "I didn't know where she went. She's with a guy. She had a badly hurt leg, though. Iniwan ko sila sa medical team at hindi ko na sila nakita pa." Ibinalik niya ang larawan sa akin. He gave me an apologetic look.

Nagpasalamat ako sa kanya. Pinuntahan ko ang medical team at nagbasakaling magtanong sa kanila. A young guy in uniform approached me and claimed that he was the one who attended Mary Grace yesterday.

"Sumama siya sa lalaki pagkatapos eh. Hindi ko na sila nakita. Hindi ko rin natanong ang pangalan nila. We we're so busy yesterday." Paliwanag niya sa akin habang tinitingnan ang larawan.

I fight the urge to sigh in disappointment. I tend to look on the bright side. So, I did not hallucinated yesterday. Nakita ko siya. Siya nga yun. She's still alive and she's here.

"Salamat ah?" I said.

Tumango ang lalaki at iniwan na ako. From then on, I lost track of where I'm going to search again. I felt hopeless again. And she's with a guy.

I couldn't deny the painful clenching of my heart upon the idea of Mary Grace dating another guy. It had been two years but she's still in my mind.

Maybe she had already moved on. Maybe she didn't even want to see you anymore.

I pushed the idea at the back of my mind. I couldn't stop now. I'm still going to find her.

Nagpunta ako sa van terminal beside Gaisano Mall of Davao and asked for directions towards Pusan Point. I pulled out the map from my bag. I also searched all the extreme points in the Philippines in places I've visited. Here in Davao it only has Pusan Point and Cape San Agustin. I hope to find her in this place. I even went back to Mavulis Island about a year ago while searching for her.

"Wala na pong bus papuntang Caraga ngayon." Wika ng driver sa akin habang nagpupunas ng pawis. The van is almost full, about to depart. "Pero pwede ka namang sumakay sa akin. Bumaba ka sa Manikling terminal tapos doon ka maghintay ng bus na dadalhin ka sa Pusan Point."

I nodded my head and climbed inside the van. My mind is still racing with thoughts of her. I'm still confused. Paano siya napunta dito sa Davao? Why the sudden appearance? What happened to her?

The sun is sinking over the horizon when we arrived at Manikling terminal. I asked around and learned that the bus is going to come around 6 in the evening. I decided to eat something at a nearby 7/11 while I wait for the bus.

When it finally arrived, I raced towards the bus at nakipagsiksikan sa mga pasaherong naghihintay din. I got a seat but later gave it up for an old woman. I stood inside the bus among other passengers as well.

"Saan ka ba papunta, hijo?"

Napatingin ako sa matanda nang bigla siyang magsalita.

"Sa Pusan Point po."

She nodded in approval. "Maganda doon, hijo. Lalong-lao na ang paglubog ng araw. Balita ko may bagong bukas na science museum ngayon." Mataman akong tiningnan ng mga kulubot niyang mata.

"Actually, I'm looking for someone there."

"Oh? Anong pangalan ng hinanap mo? Maliit lang ang populasyon ng tao sa Brgy. San Ignacio. Baka kilala ko siya."

"Mary Grace." I answered and was delighted to see her face sparked in recognition once more.

"Kilala ko nga siya."

Parang sumabog ang puso ko sa narinig. I leaned closer to the old woman, hungry for information. I could already feel her presence inside of me.

Mary Grace, I'm coming for you.