Warning: Sexual content.

I look at him. He is sitting beside me like a kid, his arms on his folded knees, a shrew sheen in his eyes as if he is preparing himself for something really hard. And I know it is. As much as it is for me, it's for him. Because we never talked about that day before. He tried to ask me things and I as always as usual evaded them. He knew it was difficult for me so he didn't push. Even though I smell like dried tears and alcohol and vomit for sure, he is looking at me like there's nothing wrong with me. " That day.... I was waiting for you. "

His eyes soften the moment I said the words. I guzzel down the reasons to not tell him the truth. " Please don't blame yourself, I was not easy during that time, I know. So that time after I came back from London. It was my birthday and you told me that you would be late as there was a charity gala you had to attend with Sahana. And Nishkarsh wanted to..." I scratch my neck and Kiyansh's eyes drops down to my neck, he frowns "Let me get you a glass of water. " He says and starts to get up, going to the glass table kept at the corner of the room, picking up a porcelain jug and filling a glass of water. He carries the glass towards me. I cringe when I see that his eyes goes to the place where I threw up earlier. He looks at me and surprisingly smiles, " It's okay. "

I fluster. " Let me. Let me clean this up. " I start to get up and he stops me. His hands falling on my shoulders. They are so warm so calloused and soft at the same time that it's hard to decide if they are soft or hard.

He hands me the glass of water. " Sit and give me a minute. " He goes to the glass table again. And opens up a silver cabinet. He gets out a box of hard cleaning tissues and starts towards the floor. I look in horror when he bends down and starts viping whatever I threw up on the floor.

" Hey! " I shreik. " It's gross. Let me clean this up. "

He turns towards me and raises his eyebrows. " 8th grade we drank for the first time. You threw up on Dad's study while cursing me half the time. I cleaned all of your mess while you prevailed dad to not enter in the study while I emptied all the evidence and mixed water in his bourbon. And cleaned up your vomit with my t-shirt so...." He smirks.

I narrow my eyes. " You better do it nice then. Clean it up and spray some perfume on it." I smirk back. "Because I remember someone pissing up in their pants when they were in certain roller coaster in Disneyland. And then begging me to not tell anyone especially their mom. And then that someone sneaked into my room and asked me how to wash pants. And even after I told that certain someone to do it step by step. They couldn't. And I had to wash someone's pissing pants in the middle of the night. "

His mouth opens wide enough to fill a whole tubewell of Nutella. " That is so unnecessary I was six. And you promised to never talk out loud about it. "

I shrug and stick my tounge out at him.
" Well I am not announcing in an open mic. We are in a room. "

He rolls his eyes but a soft corner of his mouth tilts up. " Such a devil."

He cleans up the whole mess and then take the wipe tissues to the bathroom. I hear water being on and off and after five minutes he comes out, drying his hands on a towel. He hands me another glass of water. And quirks up his eyebrows when I drink it one go. He drinks a glass himself then nods his head at me taking that place beside me again.

" Let's continue. " He says in what feels a suspiciously too determined voice.

I take a deep breath. " Now don't stop me. Okay? "

He nods his head diligently.

" So he wanted to take me someplace else. Since morning I was waiting for you. Honestly I was waiting since midnight that you would barge into my house just to surprise me. And in the morning while I was asleep he came to my flat. I thought that it was you and I blindingly opened the door excitedly and I said, ' About Time Kiyansh. ' when I looked up it was him. All balloons in his hands and cake. And a big teddy bear. He seemed obviously disappointed after hearing your name. "

I take a look at Kiyansh and unsurprisingly see his jaw harden and his eyes sadden in guilt. I shake my head and continued.

" It was not your fault. I told you, I had a fight with you about the apartment,  it was obvious you were upset. "

Kiyansh looked at me and shook his head again, his eyes turning soft gold brown.

"He came inside and tied the balloons on my chair. I felt irritated, I wanted to be alone but I felt somewhat guilty because before coming to India we had a fight about you. He wanted to stay in London for post-graduate. And he was telling me to do the same. I didn't want to stay in London anymore so I told him I didn't care, he could stay in London if he wanted to. He thought...." I take a second. "He thought that I was coming to India for you. So we fought. And he gave up his post graduation for me. And came to India with me. I...I felt guilty because he was somewhat right." I dare to look at Kiyansh, his mouth is set in a straight line. He's got that look when he is standing in the football field and knows that something wrong is happening but he can't put a hold on it.

I look down on the floor. "I felt unhappy. I tried, with him, I really tried but I just couldn't. He did everything for me and I didn't even know what he liked or disliked. It was like I was sitting with him and he was the only one talking. He noticed. Ofcourse he noticed. Specially when we came back to India. So that day, for whole day on my birthday he tried to make me smile instead of the morning scene. And it got out of hand when I refused to go with him somewhere else and I told him you would come."

Kiyansh visibly shudders and clenches his eyes shut as if reliving the horrendous memory. The veins in his forehead starts to tick. I tentatively move forward, my hands are somewhat sweaty when I grab his. I notice the ring I sent him days before the wedding sitting proudly on his ring finger. I touch it feeling as if I am living in a dream.

He opens his eyes. And... that look in his eyes. It speaks everything he never said aloud.

He lets me move around my finger on his ring finger. While taking deep certain breaths, still staring at me.

I focus on his hands continuously touching it. "We were in that bar and I knew you would come. No matter if we fought I really wanted to meet you. I never spent a birthday without you. You never missed it, I knew in my gut you would come. And then he started abashing me, yelling at me, calling me a slut for not giving upon you and still waiting for you even though you were probably somewhere else fucking your girlfriend not even remembering it was my birthday." Kiyansh stills, I look up and I see murder in his eyes. "Hey it's okay..... it's okay. You came and I swear everything was okay the very moment I saw you." I touch his face.

He closes his eyes and clenches his jaw. "Too late" he grits out from somewhere deep inside him. His whole body fuming in undeniable anger.

"If you want we can talk about it later." I say hastily. I can't see him blaming himself like this. He didn't do anything wrong.

He opens his eyes. "No. I want you to tell me everything. Every little detail." He says with unnerving determination that scares me. What he is planning to do? But he never breaks my promise, I tell myself.

I shake my head and continue. "I obviously yelled at him back and told him I couldn't do it. That...that it was all a lie and I just couldn't be in a relationship with him, it was not fair. He took it wrong way. He started apologizing and said he didn't mean what he said. I told him even if that was the case I couldn't do it. He didn't listen to me and dragged me to a corner. And then..." I shut my eyes and force the words out. "He tried to touch me. I tried to stop him he wasn't listening. I tried to yell and he muffled my mouth by forcing his hands on my mouth. But then you came. You came and saved me Kiyansh. Like always." I whisper.

Kiyansh curses. He curses loud and clear.  But beneath his curses there is a blame which I know he is putting on himself. His hands tighten on mine again. But then he loosens his hold on it  as if it's burning. I look up at him in confusion and see the way he is looking at me.

"No. no. No." I whisper. I can't handle it. I won't be able to handle if he looks at me in pity as if he's scared to touch me.

"Kiyansh you are not him." I clasp his hands tightly. Tightly enough that I know the blood flowing probably stopped in my hands. But I don't care. "I...I won't be able to handle it if you ever hold yourself back and pity me."

He looks at me tentatively. Then whispers as if in pain, like he is speaking straight from his stomach. I have never heard him speak like that.  "I would never do that to you. It was my fault I was ignoring you deliberately. What would have happened if I didn't come that day?" He looks at me so increduosly that my heart breaks.

"Oh no. But you did came. You came. My knight in shining armour you always come." A single tear falls from his eyes. I move forward and kiss his tear away. His cheeks are so soft and warm just like a child's. Who could have guess the robust looking him to have baby skin.  My own tears mingle with his. And he shudders and wraps his arm tightly around mine. I move my arms on his back soothing for minutes.

All of a sudden his arms goes to my hip and to my shock he picks me up and puts me on his shoulder. I squeak and hold onto him in surprise. He doesn't answer and opens the door and moves down the hallway going towards his bedroom. He touches his thumb on the door and the door gets unlocked. I am still in his arms when he crosses the door and makes me sit down on the king size bed. I look around and my eyes squints because of the bright lights. He snaps his fingers twice and the light dulls. Then he bends down on his knees in front of me and start massaging on my toes.

I groan. "What are you doing?"

His fingers kneads through my toes to my ankles. "You asked me to not hold back. So I am doing what I want to do."

I shiver as my sore muscles loosen under his hands. I heave a deep long sigh and tilt my head slightly back.

"You are never wearing those ridiculous heels ever again." He announces. "Why do you wear them when you hate them so much." His voice sounds deep and rough.

My feet starts to tingle. His hands suddenly starts to feel like soft bird feathers. And all my blood flows straight to my leg. "Our mothers love them. They are heels fanatic. Fashion fanatics. Least I can do is to wear them at functions when they go to such great lengths as to stuff me with them four times a month."

"Well they both have to understand that you don't like to wear them. High time now. You don't have to do anything you don't want to." He says gruffly and then I feel a shock of soft lips above my ankle.

I sit straight and open my eyes. I look down at him and find his eyes heavy lidded. A strand of messy hair falls on his  forehead and he looks so unbelievably beautiful that my stomach fills with hundreds of butterflies. The image of that arrogant imperious man sitting in front of me with that soft face on his knees, is too much.

It turns to thousand when he looks up straight at me, his eyes almost black with desire. My eyes travel down without my own accord and I see his hard length bulging through the trousers. I blush and look right avoiding his eyes. Until I hear him barely say. "Do you want to take a shower?"

My eyes travel to his with the speed of light. And I hear the question in his voice. My chest tightens. He is asking for my permission.

He always asks for permission.

I am sure I am in shade of deep red when I nod my head.

"Can I touch you?" He asks voice rough.

I don't know if I can feel hot than this. I feel hotter than a fire right now. I nod again. My brain frizzled up. I can barely process what he is saying.

His calloused fingers starts up my ankles.

I force myself to sit straight and not fall on my bed with the feel of his fingers on my thighs. He moves it in slow circles. I try not to groan but fail when it moves up through the dress and falls on the waistband of my tights. " You are so soft." He whispers on my thighs his hot breath making my skin feel so sensitive as if it will melt.

With one pull he tugs on the tights and they fall on the floor. He kisses me on thighs and I flutter. His hands go up to touch my navel. My eyes roll on the back of my head when his hands go down. He curses when he finds my panties soaked. His fingers grazing the top of them up and down. I quiver. A finger slides inside my underwear then they come undone. And I feel a shameful resolve when I remember I am wearing my smurfs underwear.

His mouth tugs suspiciously up. When he removes my underwear, my body instantly miss his hands. But then he holds my underwear in his hands as if he is holding a award. "Smurfs" he smirks. "I didn't know they were so lucky." He tilts his head up at me.

I open my mouth and find myself mortified enough that I have no answer to give him. It is the dirtiest thing he has ever said to me. And I am too shocked to find my foggy brain to answer him. He grins and then to my horror tugs the underwear in his trouser pocket.

"What...what are you doing?" I manage with my dry mouth.

"I imagined doing this at least thousand times." His looks up and down at me with his  smouldering eyes.

I blush. He leaves my leg and stands up. I almost have the image of grabbing him and pushing him back. I shake my head and try to rub off the image.

It's like he clearly knows what I am thinking. "I won't be able to stop myself if I continue. And I told you earlier we are not doing it today." He says biting his lips. My eyes shamelessly moves towards his lips and I realise I am staring at them like a lustful banshee when he grins at me.

I blush from head to toe and stand up from the bed. The position too vulnerable, too something else. I look down on the floor.

"Hey." He says roughly. I continue to look down. His hand touches my face and tilts my chin up. His brown eyes are so wide and dark , like dark chocolate mixed with stars. "You don't have to be ashamed for wanting me."

I blush again. Oh God! I will turn to the colour red if I won't stop.

"Seriously Shanvi. You don't ever, ever have to be ashamed okay?"

I open my mouth, but he puts his finger on my lips and interrupts. "I am yours." He stares at me. "I have always been yours baby. Since the time I first saw you on that field. I knew I was yours. We belong to each other. And I will rip the world apart before anyone ever touches you without your permission again." His eyes turns dangerously cold. "You don't have to be ever ashamed to want me. Because I want you with my every breath." He moves close to my body. And we are so close that our lips almost graze when he speaks up.

I move forward and touch his lips with mine. He groans and pulls me towards him until there's not a single tiny space left between us. I bite his lips. Our teeth clash. Tounges fighting for some unknown will.

For years I wanted to kiss him like that. I show him that with my kiss.

After what feels like an eternity our lips part. We both breath lungful of air. And then stare at each other. We both start laughing at the same time.

"We are behaving like horny teenagers." I quip. And laugh till my stomach hurts.

"Were you horny for me when you were a teenager?" He grins and I stick my tounge out at him. And continue to laugh.

"Because I sure was. You know when our family went to that Hawai trip and you were wearing that blue bikni on that Maui beach, I could feel my..." Before he could continue saying anything else that would haunt my mind for my entire life I put my finger on his lips.

"You asshole. You are crazy."

He rolls his eyes, smiling devilishly. "Crazy about you.  Don't you want to listen more, you are my best friend you should know every secret of mine."

"Not this." I howl.

He sticks his tongue out and licks my finger like a dog.

I remove my finger from his lips in shock. "Are you learning this habit from Denver? Oh crap ! Where is Denver? I totally forgot about him in anger. Where is the furball? I didn't even hear him bark."

I turn to move towards the door to check for him in the house when Kiyansh grabs my arm. "He's with Rabi Uncle in the other part of the house. Perfectly sleeping. And we, my wife. " He grins. He likes saying the word too much. "We need a shower. "

He drags me to the bathroom. And smirks at me before taking his shirt off. I stare at him. Or you could say at his golden abs which I knew was there but I never imagined that I could see them and stare at them until all the time I wanted for. He even does a slow turn for me grinning like the supermodel he is. His pectorals are so sexy, that I wanted to run my hands all over him. As if he read my mind, he said. "I know, I know, but you can touch them later all you want." He flexes his biceps as if he is in an auction. I pick up a shampoo bottle from his glass cabinet and throw at him.  He catches it and smiles his dimpled smile proudly. Why does he have to be perfect in everything?

"Why is there so much glass in this house?" I ask. Like literally the whole house is made of glass. Glass cabinets, glass tables, even the terrace staircase is made of glass.

He raises his eyebrows as if I am stupid to ask this question.

"What?" I say.

"Remember fourth grade, 'The princess on glass hill' and you whining to your parents how you wanted a glass mansion."

My mouth falls wide open. Like wide wide open. I pick another bottle from the cabinet and throw at him. "You are a maniac." I shrill at him.

"What?" He asks. "You don't like it?" He blinks.

"Oh my god Kiyansh, I was just a child then. I read a fairytale and whined about it. And you took it seriously? And bought this glass mansion." My heart tugs..not only because he bought this glass mansion because when I was a kid I wanted something like this. But because he remembers such little tiny things about me.

"I thought if I would buy this house. You would come stay with me maybe. I planned it hundred times to involve it in some joke and ask you some way......but never got the nerve to seriously ask you. Because you didn't even agree to visit here often, until Denver came. That's why I never gave Denver to you even when you tried to steal him away."

I smile up at him. And give him my most real smile ever. I don't have to give it to him it just comes out whenever he is in the vicinity. I move forward and hug him. Hug him and put my face on his chest. He sighs and throws the shampoo and the other bottle that he catched and hugs me back.

"I love you more than life Kiyansh. So much that sometimes I can feel your heartbeat in my heart. It's like you are there. Always there. Never gone. That's how I survived three years in London. I just closed my eyes and thought of you." I say to his chest. I can hear the staccato of his heartbeat, his scent of woodpines, chocolate and cardamom completing  me, soothing me.

"I love you so much that I don't even have to close my eyes to think of you." He says voice low. "I went to my parents house every three days to go sit where we used to near the Juliet roses you love so much. But never dared to put them here. Because I was scared if I did then you would stop coming to my parents house and they love you so much. You know that right. Mom and Dad are always on your team." He kisses my forehead. And then groans "Okay" he says in a painful tone. "I don't think that we can shower together. We are already all over eachother. And seeing you naked." He groans. "I can't manage it."

"I agree" I whisper. "Me first then."

He nods his head.

Therefore we both take shower one by one. Our eyes hungrily raking over each other when we come out of the bathroom subsequently. He literally tells me to stop in the middle of the room and stares at me like a maniac. So I do the same. After a long long moment.

He gives me his cotton soft white t-shirt and to my humilation a Disney Princess underwear from the closet, smirking all th way, quipping sarcastically "I will get matching boxers." I throw the pillow at him. And then he does the sweetest thing ever, he towel dries my hair, kisses me on the forehead and then asks me to do the same. We both lie down facing each other. Just like childhood but this time like my childhood dream come true.

Okay Fellas, how was the chapter you dirty minded people. *Wink Wink*. Tell me how you feel about the chapter. They totally are the definition of hotness. Lol. I am high on coffee.

As always I want to thank my bestest family who inspire me every single moment to pursue my dreams and I want to thank them for teaching me how to differentiate between love and toxic people. Sometimes love is not easy and we should always ask ourselves is the person we are loving, loves us enough to inspire us to love ourselves first. And I am blessed enough to say that I have the most loving family in the world who tells me to love myself and never give upon love and Kindness.  ❤️