Chapter Five: An Ache I Still Remember
Jack slept peacefully after his hearty meal. He coughed a few times in the night, but otherwise was warm and content. He could have slept the second day away, but the smell of eggs and the soft hissing of a pan woke him. Sitting up slowly on the fold out couch, Jack squinted as he peeked at the bight kitchen. Glancing up from the stove, Mark asked him sweetly. "How are you feeling?" Jack's heart flipped in his chest. Mark looked good this morning. His grey shirt had a wide neck that hung off one of his shoulders and his hair was freshly washed and hanging down the side of his face. Folding his legs beneath him, Jack shrugged out groggily. "Not too bad. My throat still feels like I swallowed sand and my head aches... but I feel... more like myself." Grabbing something off the counter, Mark walked around the counter toward him. Setting the plate down with a freshly made rolled omelet, Mark informed him as he put the back of his hand to Jack's forehead. "I'm proud of my omelets today. I'm trying a new recipe. It's got chopped leeks. Should be good for you. I've even got some miso soup with bone broth for your lunch today."
Jack could only smirk to himself. Closing his eyes, he let Mark hold his hand to his forehead for a time, before he lowered it and informed him. "Your temperature feels normal. That's a good sign. Mom always said to feed a fever with hot soups and warm blankets. Helps burn it out of your system faster." Opening his eyes, Jack coughed before thanking him. Patting his shoulder, Mark returned to the kitchen, telling him coolly. "Eat up. You'll need the energy. We've got class in two hours." Jack groaned, but Mark informed him casually. "Don't worry. Georgia knows you are sick. So, you won't be in the physical stuff today. You'll be making up for yesterday with some basic question stuff. I'm the one that has to balance both. Lucky me. You better appreciate me taking one for the team." Jack could only chuckle as he finished breakfast. After they had eaten and were dressed, they headed out to the building behind the track and soccer field. The building was the biggest gym that Jack had ever seen.
Inside had an indoor track, a basketball court, a yoga studio, a swimming pool, saunas, workout equipment, and so much more. It was simply a recreational activities building, catering to whatever your needs were to be active and health. Although, in Jack's state. It just made him sick to think of being out of breath on purpose. Leading him into a room with rows of treadmills, Mark waved to Georgia who smiled and waved them over to her. Handing Jack a clipboard, she told him sympathetically. "Sorry to hear you're unwell. I hope you get better soon. Today, I just want you to sit here and fill this form out. We did this on the first day to learn about our partners. So, you can fill it out now. While Mark... you can complete the fitness exam that is mandatory by the government to promote good health habits in daily life. We start with the treadmill. Here is your sheet to follow the program and set up your treadmill." Mark rolled his eyes, grumbling out. "Right... have you seen some of those fat fucks in government? Something tells me it's a do as I say and not as I do kind of mandatory."
Georgia tried to suppress a smile, when she told him. "Regardless. You've got one hour. Make it count. Your treadmill will be monitored." Hoping onto the treadmill, Mark filled out the information the treadmill wanted before starting the program. It started Mark off with a steady walk and Sean took a seat to read the form. Tapping the finger against his lower lip, he asked Mark with an amused smile. "What's your favorite color?" Rolling his eyes, Mark answered casually. "Green. You?" Without hesitation, Sean answered as he filled out the sheet. "Red. What's your favorite subject in school?" Mark answered in a bored tone of voice. "Culinary Arts. You?" Writing it down, Jack replied openly. "Computer Tech." Mark huffed, muttering under his breath. "No wonder you want to study all the time. Memorizing all those parts must fry your brain." Jack shot him a light glare before asking the next question. "Preferred drink?" Mark inhaled as the treadmill cranked him up to a jog, before answering. "Water... You?" Jotting it down, Jack answered simply. "Coffee."
On and on, they questioned each other of basic things. Until finally they were starting to reach the end of them. These questions were much harder and far more personal than the others had been. Feeling uneasy about them, Jack cautiously asked him. "Any parents?" Mark was panting harder since the treadmill had him in a light run, but he answered. "Mother. My father is... deceased." Jack nodded stoically, answering with a heavy heart. "Same." His answer seemed to catch Mark off guard a bit, but he kept running. Reading off the next question, he asked. "Past relationships? 'Be specific' is what it says." When Mark didn't answer as quickly as he had the others, Jack looked up at him. Mark looked genuinely distressed by the question. Panting hard, Mark finally uttered out. "Two. One female... one male." Jack wrote it, but reluctantly pried into it. "How did they end?" Mark suddenly grabbed the bars on the treadmill to move his feet off the running strip.
Pausing the program, Mark shot back darkly. "Does it say that?" Jack turned the clipboard to show him that it did anxiously. Glaring at the paper now, Mark spat out bitterly. "Why would that matter? It doesn't prove anything. It doesn't mean anything." Jack merely shrugged. He could guess why it mattered in a relationship that you were trying to form with a life partner, but he kept that to himself. Mark was clearly defensive on the subject. Taking a breath, Jack offered swiftly. "We could skip it and move on? The worst they can do is dock us points for it. We can make them up in something else." Jack flipped the page, when Mark suddenly uttered in a low voice that made it sound more like a curse word. "Chad..." Raising an eyebrow, Jack looked up, asking perplexed. "Parden?" Mark wasn't looking at him though. Mark's eyes were locked on someone across the gym. Following his eyes, Jack found himself holding his breath with trepidation.
The man a few rows toward the front of the gym stood out from the rest. Hoping off his racing treadmill, the man laughed as a woman stumbled and was flung off her treadmill beside him. The woman threw her shoe at the man, laughing heartily as she cried out. "You're an ass, Chad! I was doing good until that joke, fucker!" As Chad helped her up, Jack exhaled slowly. Chad was a least six foot tall with washboard abs and golden tanned skin. His face a mix between Asian and American roots. He was clearly proud of his body because he was one of the only guys that was shirtless and wearing breezy track shorts that showed off his strong runners' legs. Jack had to admit that the guy was impressive as far as guys went. He was clearly the athletic type. Chad helped the woman up, then kissed her cheek and playfully tugged on her blonde ponytail. It was cute to see them together with their chemistry and matching workout clothes. When Jack looked back at Mark though, he saw the clear pain in his eyes.
Mark looked so pale and had an expression that could only be defined as being both hopelessly in love and completely heartbroken. Looking back to Chad, Jack saw Chad's cold reaction the second he noticed Mark. At first Chad seemed surprised to see Mark, then in the next second, Chad's face was stony and dismissive. Looking away from Mark like he hadn't noticed him. Wrapping his arm around the woman's shoulders and hugging her to his side in a way that was clearly meant to hurt Mark in some way. It worked. Shutting off the machine, Mark hopped off the treadmill and raced out the door like a wounded animal seeking shelter. Jack stood up, calling after him, but his attention was drawn to Chad. Chad's lip curled into a smug smirk as he saw Mark flee. While another woman asked the blonde at Chad's side. "Oh, my god. Stacie, was that Mark Fischbach? The guy you used to date. You know the one. The guy who was filmed fucking some guy in high school."
The woman snorted, blushing as she retorted awkwardly. "Wouldn't surprise me. Just my luck to move here and HERE is where he goes. The guy just can't move on. I feel bad for anyone that gets hung up with him. Especially, if it's a woman. He's terrible in bed." The women shared a hearty laugh, but Chad didn't. He just wrapped an arm tighter around Stacie's shoulders. Setting the clipboard on Mark's treadmill, he waved to Georgia's confused face before racing out of the gym to find Mark. Unsure where he'd go, he headed back to their apartment. He was too sick to go wondering around campus. Upon opening the door, Jack's heart ached at the sight of Mark sitting on the floor before the couch. His head was between his knees, and he was crying as his arms protected his head from the world around him. Quietly stepping inside, Jack locked the door and crept closer to him. He'd had this impression that Mark was untouchable. That he was sarcastic and confident in himself. Seeing him now and after hearing what he had. The pieces were coming together.
Mark was broken and trying to run from something painful. Yet even here. He couldn't escape it. This was Mark's reality. His nightmare. His hell on earth. Cautiously walking over to him, Jack sat down on the couch beside him. He didn't know what to say but didn't think that sitting in silence would help him. Putting a hand on his shoulder, he flinched when Mark did. Squeezing his shoulder, he told him reassuringly. "You're gonna be ok. You are so much more going for you than they do." Without looking up, Mark's broken voice bluntly asked. "What else is there to me? Everything I ever was and everything I am has been stripped away to nothing. I am only what they say about me now." Jack shifted uncomfortably, mumbling out nervously. "That's not true. You have... plenty of good qualities. I mean... I can't think of any on the spot... but I'm still getting to know you. So... cut me a little slack. You're rough around the edges, sure. But you're a good guy underneath that."
Mark lifted his head, avoiding his eyes when he numbly retorted. "If you think that... than you don't know me at all." Putting his hands on the couch, Mark lifted himself up on the couch, then turned to face him. Seeing Mark's glossy earthy eyes made Jack inhale sharply. The deep pain he saw in those eyes was so powerful that it was crushing. They were the eyes of a man who felt aguish so deeply that he was numb to all else. Grabbing his shoulders, Mark pushed him back across the couch and adjusted over him. Jack's hand rose to push against Mark's chest as Mark slipped between his defenseless legs. Then snatching his wrists, Mark pinned them above his head and stared down at him as he said in a soft heartbroken whisper. "Don't try to make me feel better with your pity. I'm tired of trying to rationalize my feelings and decipher the true feelings of those around me. It's exhausting. I can't...I can't bear it anymore. I won't do it anymore."
Bringing his lips closer to his, Mark's voice turned heavy and breathless when he whispered more desperately. "You wanna help me? Fuck me. Make me feel something other than regret. Help me physically... because in the end... it's all you'll remember about me anyway." Mark's words sank into him like an ingot of molten emotional pain that not only hurt but made him feel disgusted with himself. His voice sharply squealed out of his throat as he choked out. "NO! I WON'T!" Startled by his voice, Mark released him and sat back on his heels. Allowing Jack to sit up and stammer out in a shaken voice. "You're better than this! I DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS!" Taking a jagged breath to get a hold of himself, Jack told him in a more composed voice. "Mark, I'm sorry. But you're not a whore and I sure as fuck, am not going to treat you like one! I will not remember you that way. I'd prefer the guy who cared for me while I was sick and didn't leave me out in the rain."
Coughing a little, Jack took a moment to breathe before adding in a sweeter voice. "I don't pity you, Mark. I want to be your friend. You don't have to go through this alone. Just talk to me." Mark was silent for a long moment, then he got up from the couch. As he walked away to his room, he muttered out lifelessly over his shoulder. "Talking about it never fixed anything before. Why would it now? You know nothing, Virgin." Jack flinched as Mark slammed his door. Had he gone too far? He felt terrible. Glancing at the score panel, his heart sank to the pit of his stomach. They sat at a solid ten points now. This was so much harder than he thought it should be. To Be Continued...
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