How many people had she killed?

Even if she hadn't been the one to physically extinguish the flame of their existence herself, she still in part caused their demise.

She caused her own mother to throw herself in front of traffic to end her own life.

Her own words broke the woman who'd suffered so much ever since she'd been born, driving her to try and end them both had Shigure not stepped in when he had.

She had believed whole heartedly that her plan to buy her classmates time back in Okinawa had been responsible for killing Samuel, and even now she had trouble believing that she hadn't. The life had drained from his eyes as she held him in her arms.

Such a memory was unshakable.

She still couldn't stop herself from thinking he really was dead, unless he was conscious enough to cling to her babbling about anything and everything that occurred to him.

The various others in Okinawa that she harmed and beat half to death weighed on her heart, there was always a chance she had harmed them beyond recovery.

And now, Genivierre had joined Yukariko in just the same way, her flame of existence extinguished all because she tried to save Amaya.

In their own way, they both tried to save her from her father's grasp, weeping as their efforts ended in vain.

Teetering on the last few seconds of their lives, their last thoughts were only of her.

And all she could do every time was watch them die right in front of her, like the useless child she'd always been called by the adults in her Okinawan life.

She couldn't do anything right, no matter what she did.

It made no difference, no matter how much she tried.

So far into the darkness, it was another set of claws to lash and drag her beneath the surface.

She couldn't see anything, couldn't feel anything except for the pain of drowning.

Crushing, suffocating, the oceans grew heavy and as cold as ice as she sunk deeper.

And she had no will left inside of her to try and fight it.

Voices rung, an endless chaos of wordless noise inside her head through the dark.

She couldn't decipher one from the other as they grew louder and louder, to the point of drowning her own thoughts out completely.

Her own desperate apologies were drowned out as well.

'I'm so sorry ... this is all my fault.'

Over and over like a mantra, a broken confession that was more than just familiar to her.

'Everything is all my fault...'

It was the one thing she'd believed without fail for the whole of her own conscious life.

She was at fault.

She was a liability.

She was responsible for another needless death.

And she couldn't cope anymore.

'How dare you so much as lay a finger on one of my students?!' The words rung deafeningly loud, and yet they didn't register inside her head. 'Not just once, but twice in just as many weeks!'

'B-Big Sister M-Meow...' The desperate pleas from the boy she'd once watch die failed to break through, instead mixing with the deafening sea of voices inside her head. 'I-its a monster! The m-monsters going to eat us!'

Natural monsters of grotesque physique don't exist.

They're just something humans created as an excuse to justify their disinterest – Cloaked in a painted image out of convenience.

The only monster that existed in this world, was her.

'And that's something you know better than anyone else, isn't it?' The haunting mirror of her own voice whispered inside her head.

'You have no place here, creature. No room to interfere, no legalities that hold you here. Its a pointless waste of time. If you know who I am, you would already have no choice but to concede and pull your various limbs out of this matter.'

'The bindings of mere humans make no difference, I will be taking my student home regardless of—Nyuuwah?!

A deafening bang tore through the darkness, the dull splut of liquid popping reverberating through the still air.

Screams tore through her ears, shrill and tearful, and she was jostled through the waters.

Her body felt limp and battered, disorientated.

She had no idea where she even was.

'Anti-Me BB's?!' A voice slightly louder than the others gasped out, slightly distorted by the sounds of liquid splattering. 'It can't be-– YOU?!'

Glimpses of grey flashed through the darkness, quick and threatening as the sound of more splattering bounced through the deafening discord.

'Please ... stop...'

She wanted it all to stop.

And she didn't care how, anymore.

'You'll never get away from me, Forty Ninth,' The distorted voice of her fathers spoke, a chillingly sadistic tone to his voice as the darkness began to crush her altogther. 'I will find you, wherever you--'

But then his words were cut short with force that ricocheted with painful force - The sudden crack of crunching bone and the deafening bang of a gunshot snapped through the deafening chaos, silencing it with terrifying force as a choking gasp rung through her ears.

It snapped her out of the emotional lockdown she'd fallen into like she'd just been struck.

It was as if everything had come to a grinding halt, a blood-curdling silence ringing as she realized she was still in that alleyway.

Lashes of white slowed mid-air while Koro-sensei froze mid-move at the sound of the gunfire. Many of his limbs had been destroyed, sulphur yellow splattered across the concrete as the few severed ends of his tentacles lashed around.

Amaya found herself sprawled across the ground just next to Genivierre's lifeless body with the alleyway wall at her back. A terrified Samuel clung to her with his face buried in her side, cowering as Toji's sizable form hunched right over her, his left hand closed around her right wrist.

However, there was a gaping hole in his right shoulder, blood splattering over Amaya's petrified form as he wavered on his feet.

His face was contorted into shock, as if he didn't understand what had even happened.

'A-Amaya-san?!' Koro-sensei gasped out in horror.

Toji's grip of her wrist tightened as his eyes refocused on her once again.

And then, another deafening crack tore through the air as Toji was hit, blood spurting forward from a bullet tearing through his chest as he crashed to the floor away from her.

'AMAYA-SAN!' Koro-sensei's panicked voice shrieked, and in less than an instance, the now normal-coloured octopus had snatched both her and her brother up off the concrete, whisking them quickly beneath the outer coat of his teachers robes. Glimpses of white lashed out towards them, but before they could so much as reach them, Koro-sensei launched himself up into the air.

Higher and higher, the octopus took them both away as fast as he could, as more gunshots tore through the already chaotic Berlin air.

And all Amaya could do was stare mutely, watching as Genivierre's broken body disappeared into the darkening cityscape below.

Everything was still as they soared over the lands at a safe distance, speckled only by the soft whirling of wind bouncing from the top of Koro-sensei's head, and Samuel's muffled sobbing into Amaya's side.

The Octopus didn't try to get her to talk, and didn't break into his usual act of jovial lecturing or anything else.

He left them be, knowing it was best.

There was nothing that could be said.

Shadows stretched out over the world, gradually as nightfall began to fall.

Clouds began to roll across the skies the further Koro-sensei took them, a charge to the air the only sign that there was turbulence about. In the distance, rain began to fall to the earth like a faint mist in the air.

All these things drifted past Amaya unaware – It all passed her by in a blur.

The world was dark as the speed of their escape slowed, the many lights of man-made design below glimmering faintly through the lightly misting rain. The smallest sounds of rumbling in the air dotted their otherwise silent flight.

Worn out by the events just passed, Samuel had eventually sobbed himself to sleep, his arms clutched around her like a vice.

They descended upon the earth as the lands were darkened by indigo and grey shadows, the crescent moon absent beyond the clouds in its entirety as the Octopus' various feet touched down on solid ground.

'Welcome back to Japan.' Koro-sensei spoke gently, just as he'd lifted her and Samuel from beneath his black coat. 'First, Sensei will--'

'Target!' The sounds of a shouted voice echoed through the dark, combined with running footsteps as Amaya was set down on the ground gently. 'What's the meaning of--'

'Karasuma-sensei, could you please get in contact with Amaya-san's guardian and ask him to drop in.' Koro-sensei cut in, silencing the man as he began to walk the two towards the dark building just up ahead. 'I would like to have a long chat with him.'

Silence, if only for a second.

'...You're to explain yourself afterwards.' The ever-serious man responded.

Nothing else was said, nothing at all as the octopus lead her inside, a tentacle nudging her along at her back.

No lights illuminated the world around her, the dull sounds of footsteps against wood the only sounds that gave any indication of where he was taking her.

But the smell was familiar ...

She just couldn't remember where it was from.

'This should do nicely for the time being.' The Octopus said as the sounds of a door sliding open echoed faintly, the sounds of grit between the two surfaces a sign of wear and age as she was gently pushed inside.

The click of the light echoed overhead as it gradually flickered to a dull life, gradually revealing a room she couldn't seem to recognize.

A bed, a cubicle curtain, old, run down wood walls and a window the Octopus had managed to pull the curtains over.

A desk on the opposite side of the room adorned with makeshift medical items.

Why couldn't she recognize where she was?

The light cast a soft, incandescent glow to the room, though it didn't quite illuminate anything, either.

There was nothing that came to her at first – She only vaguely recalled that Koro-sensei had even brought her in here.

Everything was dull, disconnected in a sense.

She couldn't fell anything – She felt almost completely numb.

She couldn't even tell if she was even breathing where she stood.

'Sensei will leave you both in here for just a second.' Koro-sensei spoke as he set Samuel down on the bed, straightening up as he seemed to let out a small breath. 'Just while I find some clothes for you to--'

'Target.' Karasuma's voice spoke up all of a sudden, cutting Koro-sensei off immediately. 'Katsuragi-san's guardian is here.'

'Already? That was very efficient, even for you, Karasuma-sensei.'

'I had no hand in that – He arrived entirely on his own, insisting that he is only here to take Katsuragi-san away.'

Koro-sensei let out a breath as he cast a quick glance over at Amaya.

'Then please tell him to wait. I need to tend to Amaya-san's injuries--'

'He insists that this cannot wait.' Karasuma cut in quickly, silencing Koro-sensei. 'He threatens to use force to take Katsuragi-san with him, if necessary.'

'I see. That's quite unfortunate and careless.' Koro-sensei responded as he lifted one of the small blankets from the end of the bed and draped it over Samuel. 'Of course, I will not allow that, with or without an explanation from him.'

No response – Either the ever-serious man had nothing to say, or he just didn't want to say anything.

The look he was casting Koro-sensei was remarkably sharp, regardless, conveying a sense of disapproval that the octopus didn't miss.

He let out a sigh as he turned his head towards Karasuma.

'Very well, I will be there in just a minute. Please have him wait in the classroom.'

The Octopus seemed to look over at Amaya as the door shut gently, his form flickering slightly as he disappeared at his mach speeds a few times.

Every instance, a new item appeared in the room, set on the desk until it was almost cluttered with various items.

The blue material of the school gym clothes, a bucket and washcloth, a few cans of various drinks and a couple of packets of other edible items.

'Sensei has to leave you in here for a short while, Amaya-san.' The octopus explained gently, steering the motionless girl to sit at the foot of the bed. 'I will just be in the classroom, if you need anything, or anything happens, please don't forget to come see Sensei.'

Silence at first – His words almost didn't register inside her head.

About the most that did come to her understanding was 'don't forget to come see Sensei'.

'Amaya-san?'

She managed to nod her head slightly after a few seconds.

'Good, Sensei shouldn't be too long.'

It was then, that Koro-sensei disappeared completely, leaving Amaya standing there all alone.

The faint rumbling of thunder in the distance shook the window in its frame, a faint rattling against the otherwise still night. The darkness outside reflected inside the room, the sombre atmosphere inside almost influencing the world outside.

She slowly slumped to the floor, neither noticing or even realizing the condition she was in as she stared down at the floor beneath her.

The sounds of murmuring voices in the next room echoed much like a dull hum, faint enough where no words could be heard, but their presence was there none the less.

It felt uncomfortably similar to all those times she was awake inside her Isolation tank.

The haunting times where she didn't understand what was happening, but she at least knew that it had something to do with her.

The longer she stayed seated there, the more her body startled to tremble and ache, and it felt so heavy she didn't understand what was even wrong.

The air felt horribly cold, and it eventually brought her to pull her knees to her chest.

Dark smears were left where her feet were on the floor, her sneakers matching the colour in thick smears around the stitching.

Everything smelled so strongly of blood.

She hated that smell, and yet ... it was always the one colour that she was always drawn to.

It was the one colour all the clothes her mother picked for her were in.

She always found that colour always followed her wherever she went.

The sounds of rain gently pelting against the roof gradually met her ears, drawing her just the smallest bit out of her closed off state.

She blinked as the old and worn out light in the ceiling began to flicker and fade completely, her gaze shifting upwards as she tried to figure out why the light was disappearing.

But then she froze as she noticed, that her hands were covered in blood.

She began to realize that this really wasn't some horrific nightmare inside her head.

And then, everything began to sink in on her at that moment.

The blood over her hands was still damp, the humidity in the air stopping it from drying.

Her hands began to tremble violently as her body released that lock-down it had put over her, her gaze traveling down to find that there was more blood over her.

Her arms, her legs, even over her clothes and face.

The blood of others stained her a vivid, visceral display, breaking her apart and ripping the breath from her.

She didn't want anybody to get hurt.

She didn't want anybody to die.

All she wanted was to be left alone, but no matter what she did, she still got people hurt.

She honestly hated her father, claimed she couldn't care less about what happened to him.

But she never wanted that to happen to him.

It hurt too much to keep living like this.

She wanted to die.

Maybe then, everyone who got close to her would stop getting so hurt just because she was alive.

Her siblings could live happy lives without having the possibility of Toji coming to use them against her.

Her friends didn't have to deal with the trouble she caused them all the time.

And ... nobody else she loved would die trying to protect her.

A scream rose in the back of her throat, strangled as she struggled to breathe, her tears trailing burning lines over her bruised and damaged skin.

However, the sudden presence of another in the room had it catch painfully in her throat, of something grabbing hold of her through the dark.

She didn't understand what was going on, at least not at first.

The grip was firm, yet sodden with water, a pair of arms wrapped around her shoulders to pull her close.

And it brought the tears to spill over worse.

'L-let go ...' She pleaded as best she could, her voice breaking as she struggled to keep herself together. 'P-please...'

They had to let go – She couldn't let them get killed because of her.

Instead, almost as if to spite her, the arms just tightened their hold of her.

'P-please ... just l-let go...'

'Shut up.' Came her favorite voice, quick to rebuke her. 'I'm not going to listen to anything you have to say right now.'

His tone however lacked any bite, and it was far too composed. The hold he had of her was too tight to match, and even over her own deteriorating condition, she could feel the tension in him.

His breath against her shoulder trembled as he seemed to take a breath.

'I can't leave you alone – It hasn't even been a week since we got back from Okinawa, and this is the condition I find you in!' He began, his voice barely louder than a whisper. 'Even cats don't have the same number of lives you seem to go through this year alone.'

She didn't know what she'd even expected to hear him say.

But she knew it certainly wasn't that.

'I-I'm sorry...' She whispered.

Silence, if only for a moment.

'You're hopeless...' She heard him speak with a sigh. 'What are you even apologizing for?'

What ... for?

There was so much she had to apologize for.

She just caused problems for everyone.

She ruined everything just by being here.

Everyone got hurt because of her, and she couldn't stand it anymore.

Why couldn't he see that?!

'You have nothing to apologize for. You just think you do.' Karma eventually spoke into her ear, his hold of her tightening just a little more. 'You're a moody cat who doesn't know how to be selfish. And I won't let you leave again when you're already out of spare lives. With your luck, you'll probably kill yourself by sneezing, of all things.'

She was stunned to silence, the tears still falling as she stared out into the dark ahead of her.

Here she was on the verge of an emotional fit ... and he was issuing nothing but cat jabs like nothing had changed?

It broke down what was left of her composure, reducing her to a sobbing mess.

'I'm here for you... so just let me help you.'

---=[Authors Notes]=---

Another chapter, as I understand you all were eagerly awaiting Amaya's return to Tokyo for many many reasons, so here we are.

Our translation notes are as follows:

Funsai suru - Translates roughly as Shatter if I'm not mistaken, which is written as 粉砕する in this instance.

All the best, guys~!

<3 Loki-Roki