A/N: I AM SO SORRY FOR THE FEELS THAT I HAVE INFLICTED ON YOU. I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON AND I SHOULD BE THROWN IN JAIL FOR ALL THE HORRIBLE THINGS I HAVE DOME TO YOU, MY WONDERFUL FOLLOWERS, WHO HAVE DONE NOTHING TO HARM ME IN ANYWAY. SO THIS IS MY APOLOGY.

I'M SOOORRRRYYYYY!!! I'M SORRY FOR WHAT I HAVE DONE TO YOU AND WHAT I WILL DO TO YOUR FEELS!!!!

;;3;;

Marie's funeral was dark and no one was speaking but the man saying a speech. Mari held Bella in her arms, the child quiet but with her eyes wide, starring out at the people all dressed in black.

"This is terrible..." Mari said, her head down, whispering softly to Bella. The baby looked at Mari, a question in her eyes. "This is reliving my mother's death all over again... the fake one." Mari said.

Stein was still in the hospital, with a coma. He hadn't woken up yet so Mari had been taking care of Bella, not setting her down even once. She hadn't been going to school and she didn't plan to go back to her classes. Kidd had talked to her about it and she had promised him that she would still work on becoming a death scythe, but she couldn't deal with anymore from the other students.

She started crying a little and her tears dripped onto Bella. She began to fuss and Mari moved her up and down a little. Kidd put a hand on Mari's shoulder and leaned in. "Are you okay?" he asked, his eyebrows scrunching together. She nodded and held Bella close to her chest. "Do you want me to take Bella, Mari?" Kidd said and Mari shook her head.

"It's okay." She said, her tears obvious. She moved her black hat down to cover her dark eyes. She held Bella close to her face. "It's alright, Bella. I'm here. It's okay." She held Bella with one arm and wiped her tears away with her other hand.

'Why is life so cruel?' she asked herself.

'Because, how could we know joy without pain?' a voice replied and Mari felt her heart break completely.

'What's a little more pain?' another voice said and she shoved them away.

Bella was quiet now, starring into Mari's black eyes with her bright blue ones. She was such a smart little girl, and Mari knew that she would be a powerful weapon or meister. Bella pulled on a strand of Mari's hair to get her attention and she smiled as Mari came out of her daze. She lightly kissed Bella's forehead, her tears falling.

The funeral ended quickly and Mari and her friends walked home in silence. Mari held Bella close to her and even when someone else asked if she needed a brake, Mari would shake her head no and continue walking.

She was tired by the time they all reached the Gallows Mansion. Mari walked in, keeping her head down. Bella was asleep and Mari knew that the only reason pain wasn't rushing over her was because of Bella. She would've been in the state of mind that would cause her to have to be lock away, if it hadn't been for the thought of Bella without anyone holding her. Her father was in a coma, and her mother was dead. She wiped away a tear.

They all sat in the living room, making the space feel too quiet and faded. Mari held Bella so she could put a hand to her face to wipe away the tears.

"I'm sorry..." Mari said and wiped her other cheek. "This is all my fault. If had just never come to the school then Marie would be alive and Stein wouldn't-"

Mari's head whipped to the side as Black Star slapped her. She held her cheek as Bella woke up, beginning to cry. Her face was hot and Kidd stood, his stance protective.

"Shut up, Mari." Black Star said. "Stop blaming yourself." He clenched his fists and looked at her with angry green eyes. "If you had never come to the DWMA, you would probably be dead. That thing that killed your dad probably would've killed you."

"He could've, you idiot!" Mari screamed, angry. "He had the chance! I was helpless, right in front of him! And if I was dead, none of this would've happened!" she said, tears flowing down her face as Bella wailed.

"You're right, Mari." Black Star said, shrugging his shoulders. "If you were dead, none of this would've happened. But," he said, jabbing a finger at her. "If you were dead, you would've never met us, Kidd. You would have never met Amme or Bella. You would've died, ignorant, about your mother, you would've never killed four witches that were threats to the DWMA. You would've never known Ray or Crona. And what about Marie? You think she would want to hear you saying this? The person who she wanted to take care of her daughter if her and Stein ever died?" he took in a breath, the room absolutely silent. He crossed his arms. "You think about that?"

Mari looked up at Black Star, her cheek stinging as the tears flowed. She wiped her face with the back of her hand as she started sobbing. Bella's little hands reached up, touching Mari. "I hate you." She sobbed. "I hate... you because... you're right..." she said, her shoulders shaking.

Liz started crying and she left the room, Patty following her, saying something to cheer her up. Tsubaki was crying quietly and she sat on the couch with her hands clasped. Maka was sitting on Soul's lap with her arms around his neck. Her knees were tucked into herself and her head rested on his chest.

Black Star look down at Mari with anger in his eyes. He stormed out, punching a hole in the wall. Tsubaki stood and walked after him, her head down. The door slammed and Bella started crying again.

Mari sat there, watching her world fall around her for the millionth time. If only she could go back and change it, then none of them would've had to deal with her. They would have never had to feel the pain that she carried with her.

She looked up, realizing Kidd was saying something. "Free and Erica said their "New Master" sent them. Maybe we can find them and get revenge." Kidd said, his fists in balls.

Mari stood, tears streaming down her face. "Take Bella." She said, handing the crying girl to Kidd. He fumbled with her for a second, not expecting it. Mari turned and walked with her hand over her mouth. "I don't feel great."

She put her arm on the wall to keep herself from falling and, tried to catch her breath. The grief was crushing in on her, and her body began to shut down. Kidd handed Bella to Maka and ran to Mari. He gently put a hand on her back and put his other hand on her stomach.

"Mari?" he asked. She could feel the warmth of his touch like soft rose pedals on freezing cold ice water. "Mari, are you oaky?"

Mari shook her head, a muffled sob escaping her lips. "No." she said in a shaking voice.

Kidd held onto her and kissed the top of her head. "Do you need something?" he asked, trying to help. "A shower? Tea?" he said.

Mari nodded. "I'll go take a shower." She said. She leaned into him for a moment, her body shaking uncontrollably. Her fingers were pressing into her face as she held her mouth closed to keep from sobbing.

Kidd held his strong arms around her for a moment longer. "Go." He said. "It'll make you feel better."

Mari pulled away from him and stumbled to the stairs, catching herself before she could fall. She pulled herself up and walked to Kidd's room, opening the dark room and walking to the bathroom. She flicked on the light and closed the door, locking it.

She took in a breath, then fell backwards, sobbing escaping her lips. She couldn't stop her tears as she thought about Marie. She would never be able to hug her anymore, and Bella would never get to meet her mom. She held herself, her hand pressing into her chest.

She stood, shaking and took off her clothing. She turned on the shower and stepped into the hot water. She leaned her head against the shower wall and began to cry again. Her stomach roiled and she clenched her fists and she gasped, not wanting to throw up. Her body heaved and she squeezed her eyes shut.

She sat down on the wet tiles of the shower and watched the water drag her blood down the drain. She held her neck as her throat burned. She pushed her hair out of her face and looked up with her dark, black, eyes.

She started thinking about what Black Star had said and cried harder. She banged her fist into the ground. "It's not fair!" she screamed. "Why..." she said, gasping for air. Her head came to rest on her knees and she held her stomach. "Why did I ever have to come into their lives? If I was gone... if I had never come... everything would be okay! I should just disappear, then everything will be okay again for them!"

A minute later, Mari got out of the shower, feeling a little better, but still with a horrible feeling in her heart. She saw a pair of pajamas on a little table and thought that Kidd must have put them there. She would've blushed, but she was just too sad.

She slipped on the soft clothes and brushed out her hair. She opened the bathroom door and saw Kidd sitting on his bed, his black night clothing matching his hair. Mari met his golden eyes and saw that they were red from crying.

"K-kidd?" she asked and he bent his head down.

"I heard what you said. About how you wished you had never come." Kidd said. He ran a hand through his hair. "About how everything would be better if you disappeared." He looked up at her. "But I wouldn't be okay." He said, utter pain in his voice.

Mari stood there, small tears falling from her eyes as her heart broke again and again. "Kidd..." she said.

He stood and grabbed her. He pulled her into a tight hug, pressing her close to him. "Stop..." he said. He sat back on the bed, pulling her with him and holding her. "Stop crying, damn it."

Mari looked up at him moving so she could see his face. She took his face in both her hands and smiled as her tears kept flowing. "But... but without agony... pain... grief... how could our hearts feel love and passion... joy... happiness..." Mari said.

Kidd leaned his forehead on her shoulder. "But... it's not fair." He said. "You've felt so much pain... grief and agony... but none of the joy and happiness... it's not fair." He said, his voice shaking with hate. Hate as if he was mad at someone for stealing Mari's joy.

She took his face in her hands again and looked into his eyes. "But, I have you..." she said and he grabbed her in a tight hug.

"I love you, Mari..." he said. Her arms wrapped around him and hugged him back. "I love you so much, Mari..."

Mari shook a little at his words. "I love you, Kidd." She said, her voice quivering. But she was scared.

She wasn't scared of Kidd, or someone else with Bella, or Free and Erica's new master. She was scared for Kidd. She knew one day, she was going to go insane and begin to kill people. She didn't even know how long she would have, but, she could feel the clock ticking away. The madness was still in her, burning strong and bright, and it kept chipping away at her sanity, dragging it down to the depths of despair and hate. She knew that one day soon, she was going to go over the edge and that would be it. Mari Ikiru would be gone forever. No one would remember the blue-haired girl that smiled and gave away hats.

The only thing they would remember, would be the girl with black demon eyes and needle teeth, slicing through souls with two-foot claws, ripping apart families and brining tragedy. All they would remember would be the girl who succumbed. The girl who was too weak, helpless to fight against it all for a little longer. All they would remember would be the terrifying monster that ate peoples souls and that was never human.

Mari pulled away so she could look at Kidd. "Kidd?" she said and he looked at her. She brushed a strand of hair away from his eyes as her lips started to tremble.

"What is it, Mari?" Kidd asked, his eyes full of worry.

Mari ran her hands down his face, trying to smile for him. "Will you make me a promise?" Mari said and Kidd nodded without hesitation. "Will you promise me that when I'm gone, you wont remember the monster that hurt people?" Kidd opened his mouth to say something, but Mari put a finger to his lips before he could break down. "Promise me that you'll remember the girl that you loved. Please just remember Mari. Not this monster that's in front of you." She said. She tilted her head to the side, trying to smile as tears streaked her face. "Please?" she said.

Kidd nodded, tears beginning to stream down his face too. "I promise, Mari."