06. | HOUSE CALLS

PALE SUNLIGHT STREAMED through the blinds on the window, illuminating flecks of dust in the bedroom. The clouds in the sky made it seem twice as bright, the white, undisturbed puffs reflecting the sun. A gentle breeze caused a tree branch to tap cautiously at the window. Christina was sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on knees, staring at nothing. Every so often she ran a hand through her golden-blonde hair.

    "You know," said a smooth voice from behind Christina. "I normally don't make house calls, but for you, I made an exception. Dr. Cho was showing me her regeneration cradle when Natasha called me and I got on the first flight out of Seoul for you."

    Christina turned to see that Liam King was standing in the doorway of the Barton's guest bedroom. She could tell that he was extremely tired. There were deep circles under his eyes. His skin seemed paler and lightly flushed—probably from the stress of everything that's happening. Most of his dark hair was messily pushed back away from his face, but a few unruly curls stuck limply to his forehead, to the sheen of sweat that covered his skin.

    Christina managed a small smile. "Well, I guess I should feel honored for being held in such high regard."

    "Yes," Liam said quietly. "Yes, you should."

    "I'm sorry that Natasha made you come all the way out here, Liam."

    "I'm actually happy to help."

    "I hate causing you trouble."

    Liam laughed once—more a bark than a laugh.

    Christina breathed a faint sigh. "I guess that's nothing new, is it?"

    "No, not really."

    The humor in the air died instantly. Liam crossed the room and sat on the twin-size bed next to Christina.

    "So what's the story, anyway?" Liam asked her. "I mean, since the last we...well, before, you know..." He struggled for the words. He took a deep breath and tried again. "What I'm trying to ask is...did Tony really screw the pooch and is everything fucked-all-to-hell?"

    Christina took a deep breath. "It appears to be that way."

    Liam's face puckered up like he'd just liked a lemon. He desperately wanted to get away from that subject. "I'm not gonna lie, Christina. You look like hammered crap."

    "I know," she sighed. "And I feel worse."

    "That's what happens when you try to take on the twins from The Shining and their Terminator boss," Liam agreed.

    Christina laughed. "I was reluctant at first when Natasha mentioned calling you, but I'm glad you're here. It feels nice to smile. I don't know how much more drama I can stand."

    Liam rolled his eyes.

    "Okay, okay," she agreed. "I bring it on myself."

    "Yeah, you've got that right. What were you thinking, Christina? We've all been telling you that you weren't ready to go back into the field, but did you listen? Seriously!"

    "Did Natasha ask you to yell at me?"

    "Sort of. Said to try and knock some sense into you. Though I can't figure out why everyone thinks you'd listen to me. You never have before. All you do is listen to my advice and never take it."

    Christina sighed.

    They sat in silence for a long while, just enjoying each other's company. The sun broke through a passing cloud, and she had to narrow her enhanced eyes when it shone harshly through the window. She squinted for a moment, letting her eyes adjust. There were no sounds besides the hollow whoosh of wind. For a brief moment, Christina felt at peace.

    She would have been happy to sit there forever, to never disturb the peace, but the universe had other plans. Plans that needed her undivided attention.

    Despite this, Christina allowed herself to sit in the silence. She stared at the walls of the room, brightened by the sun outside. She let her mind wander idly for a moment—hearing Liam's soft breathing beside her. But, after a few minutes, she found herself more alert, anxiety creeping back into her stomach, twisting it into uncomfortable positions.

    Christina glanced over her shoulder at Liam's dark brown leather briefcase lying at the foot of the bed. He must've set it down when he walked in. "So, you got a sonogram machine in that fancy leather briefcase of yours?"

    "Sonogram machine? Why would I need to bring a—" Liam's eyes widened suddenly and his face partially drained of its color. She saw his body go still with shock. "Oh, my god! You and Spangles have been playing 'hide the flagpole'! And now, you're preg—"

    "Be quiet, Liam! Be quiet!" Christina said urgently. "I thought Natasha would've told you when she asked you to come out here."

    "No." Liam shook his head, eyes still wide. "She didn't tell me anything. She just said that something happened to you and to come out here as fast as possible."

    "Of course she did," Christina had the strange feeling she'd wandered into a surreal comedy, only she didn't know her lines. She didn't know what to say to Liam, who was looking rapturous for answers that she didn't have.

    "Does Steve know?"

    "He didn't twenty minutes ago, but who knows who Natasha has—and hasn't—told."

    "What are you going to do, Christina?" asked Liam. "Do you want to keep the baby, or...?"

    How was she supposed to bring a child into this life? Christina chose this life on her own, and that—at times—sucked enough. She'd seen how Steve had been acting lately. He was doing everything—and seemed content—to stay in this life. They had never talked about starting a family. Neither of them thought it was in cards due to their genetic mutations. Suddenly, she was overcome with guilt at the realization that she were possibly going to ruin his life with this.

    Christina pursed her lips, unsure. "I-I don't know what I want, Liam. I haven't really had the time to think about it seriously yet. I mean, Steve doesn't even know—"

    "You know what you want," Liam said. "Don't think, just answer. What are you going to do about the baby?"

    "I want to keep the baby." Christina replied firmly. "Yeah. Yeah, that's what I want."

    It was going to be a very long day and she knew it was no good pretending that she wasn't frightened, because she was. Aliens and terrorists she could handle, but this...this was beyond anything she had been trained for and she didn't know what to do.

    All Christina could think about was Steve and how she was going to tell him. She doesn't know what he'll say—but, at this point, at least he would know. She never imagined that he would leave her to handle this situation on her own. She keeps picturing his face in her mind...oh, I'm scared, she thought. Her stomach was churning and could barely keep still. She felt as if she might fly apart into a million pieces.

    All the emotions she'd been suppressing for the last days—for the last weeks, for the months since she had escaped—were surging forward. It was like a great tidal wave inside her, over which she had no control. She realized she was shaking when Liam laid a gentle hand on her forearm.

    Christina had been keeping a lid on her feelings for so long, shoving down all the anxiety and fear and the anger where it wouldn't be seen. All the worry about her friends, all the terror of the unknown, all the shame and humiliation she'd felt for being captured, she'd buried it deep. But now it was coming back. All of it, all at once, in a maelstrom of impossible violence. Her heart was pounding crazily; her ears rang. She felt that nothing mattered except to let it all out, to show the world that she wasn't invincible. That she wasn't brave or strong.

    Tears were trying to force themselves out of her eyes. Christina felt her thoughts slow down. And in spite of herself, she felt a strangled giggle well up in her throat. Poor Christina. The aftermath of all of their ventures seemed to have the biggest affect on Christina.

    The giggle let loose a few tears and she sat and wiped them off, shaking her head. Oh, God, how did things turn out this way? What a day. She should be feeling some sort of excitement because of the little miracle growing inside her, and instead she was crying as Liam tried to awkwardly console her. At last the sobs and giggles both abated and Christina felt a wash of tiredness. She leaned against Liam trying not to think of anything for a while, and then she stood from the bed.

    Why had she let herself get so upset? But her emotions were still close to the surface, as she found herself standing in the center of the room. The blazing sun casted shadows across her face. It was wonderful, her eyes stinging again.   

    Her knees buckled. She had to grasp at the wall to hold herself up. Liam reached out like he was offering support, but then he thought better of it and dropped his hands.

    "Feel better?" Liam asked.

    Christina nodded, not really sure how her voice would come out. She sniffled a little and wiped harshly at her wet eyes. Years of training drilled into her that she should never let her emotions cloud her judgment and now she felt weak for letting them get their way, just to make a point in her mind.

    Liam nodded and swallowed visibly and stood from the bed before throwing his arms around Christina. He slammed into her so hard that the force would have hurled them to the ground if Christina's arms hadn't caught him and held him up. It knocked the breath out of both of them—their arms locked tightly around one another.

    "You have to stop acting as if you're alone in this," Liam said in an artificially calm voice as they separated. "You're so strong, Christina," Liam rubbed the tears off the woman's cheeks with his thumbs. "I honestly don't see how you can be so strong about everything that has happened to you."

    "You won't tell the others, right? At least, not until I'm ready."

    She felt that she had to think, but her head was pounding. She reached out toward the wall once more and put a hand against it, sliding down to sit on the floor. Things seemed all at once confused and frighteningly clear. Something strange and dangerous was coming for them.

        She felt a trembling begin deep inside her, and then she found she couldn't make it stop. Emotional overload, she thought, and put her head in her hands. Her earlier sense of desolation and loneliness had been pushed aside for the moment. There was something more important than her own problems now. And she clung to that something, because the truth was that she really couldn't deal with her own situation, no, she really, really couldn't...

    Liam looked at her, then nodded.

    Christina felt as if she had taken some final step over an invisible line and that there was no returning.

▲▽▲

Tony Stark swung the axe over his head and brought it down upon another log, successfully splitting it down the middle. Steve Rogers was standing across from him, doing the exact same thing.

    "Thor didn't say where he was going for answers?" asked Tony, tossing the log pieces onto his pile that was significantly smaller than Steve's.

    "Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things," replied Steve as he moved back to his axe, briefly glancing at Clint and his children on the porch. "I was kind of hoping Thor would be the exception."

    "Yeah, give him time," said Tony, setting up his next log. "We don't know what the Maximoff kid showed him."

    Tony glanced up at the roof of the Barton's farmhouse and eyed the blonde woman who was sitting there. Her knees were curled up and tucked under her chin as she stared out into the distance. Steve followed Tony's gaze and he swung his axe down in agitation. Christina had been on the roof for the past thirty minutes, but she'd never once looked down.

    "'Earth's Mightiest Heroes'," Steve muttered sarcastically, grabbing another log. "Pulled us apart like cotton-candy."

    "Seems like you walked away all right."

    Steve locked eyes with Tony, challenging. "Is that a problem?"

    "I don't trust a guy without a dark side," replied Tony, whacking his axe down on his log at last. "Call me old fashioned."

    "Well, let's just say that you haven't seen it yet."

    "You know Ultron is trying to tear us apart, right?"

    Steve's eyes narrowed. "Well, I guess you'd know. Whether you tell us is a bit of a question."

    Tony bristled, arguing: "Banner and I were doing research."

    "That would affect the team."

    "That would end the team," Tony clarified sharply. "Isn't that the mission? Isn't that why we fight, so we can end the fight, so we get to go home?"

    That had done it and Steve angrily tore the log in half with his bare hands. He tossed the pieces to the side, whirling around to face Tony. "Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die. Every time."

    Tony clenched his jaw and their conversation was interrupted when Laura walked over. "I'm sorry. Mr. Stark, uh, Clint said you wouldn't mind. Our tractor. It doesn't seem to want to start and I thought maybe you could—"

    "Yeah, I'll give her a kick." Tony said, hands on his hips. "Don't take from my pile, Rogers."

    Once Tony had disappeared inside the barn, Laura turned toward Steve. "The easiest way onto the roof is in the attic through the skylight. That's how she usually gets up there."

    Steve blinked, taken aback. Laura smiled softly before walking back into the house. He glanced up at the roof where Christina still sat, still in the exact same position. He deliberated for a moment longer before he walked into the house. Clint watched him as he walked passed on the porch, but didn't comment and Steve was grateful for that. He headed up the stairs, reaching the attic in no time with his quickened steps. He hauled himself easily up out of the skylight and onto the roof, spotting Christina immediately as she sat unmoving in her spot.

    Steve knew she'd heard him—it was impossible not to with her heightened senses—but she made no move to acknowledge his presence. In the back of his mind he was glad that she hadn't leapt off the roof to avoid him—and at this point, he wouldn't put it past her if she did, but he didn't like the fact that she was actively trying to shut him out.

    "I wanted to be left alone," said Christina as Steve settled down on the roof beside her.

    "I know, and that's exactly why I came up here." Steve replied. "I thought we were past shutting each other out." Christina remained silent. "What did you see? When the Enhanced touched you."

    Christina sighed, wringing her hands. There was a pinch at the back of her eyes, but she refused to cry again. She'd done that enough for the day. "It was Germany—it was him—all over again. It felt too real to just be a vision; it was like I was reliving it, except it was worse this time."

    Steve took this information in stride, he'd been expecting this. "Sebastian is long gone. We've talk about this, Chris. He is long gone. You killed him and he can't hurt you anymore."

    "Doesn't matter because I saw it," Christina insisted, swallowing hard. She decided that this wasn't the best conversation—or time—to bring up the fact that she was pregnant and saw their child in her vision. "It was the same cell, same stupid metal chair, same metal bars on the sole window, same torture."

    "It was just the girl's powers playing with your mind. It wasn't real, Chris, it won't happen again."

    "But it did happen, Steve." Christina shouted, something purling inside her veins. "That's what kills me. It happened and it could possibly happen again. The choices I've made, the things I've done—Sebastian was just one consequence to those things. There are plenty of people out there who would be glad to see me dead...or worse. What if you and the others get hurt because of me? I don't think I could live with myself—"

    "Nothing is going to happen to us, Christina." Steve promised. He wrapped an arm around her tense shoulders, pulling her into his side. "I won't let it happen. I won't let anyone hurt you. I promise that we'll do everything we can to keep people safe."

    "I'm not worried about what happens to me, Steve."

    "You may not be, but I am and I can't go through this life without."

▲▽▲

not edited

(a/n: i do not own the gif above, i found it on google and the rights go to the gifs' rightful owner)