((Hhhh I wanted some angst, so enjoy this. Im warning you that Tim has a serious mental breakdown and nearly kills everyone Lol he also tries to commit suicide, so trigger warning. I just want pain and tears))

Jay and Brian knew Tim had been struggling lately. He was rarely sleeping, he was having nightmares when he did sleep, and he was paranoid...more than usual.
It was close to the time he had killed Alex...and he wasn't taking it easy. He felt so much guilt. Alex had lost it and he let his fear and anger control him..but, in the end, The Øperator was following Tim.

Alex was an innocent life taken.

And Tim couldn't help but wonder...what could he have done? What could he have become?
The guilt was worse than anyone could imagine it be...he was drowning and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't get out of it.

Jay tried his hardest to talk to his boyfriend, but he got nothing out of him. Just bouts of self-loathing.
Brian tried and even he got nothing. They both were worried about Tim, seeing as he could act on any one of those thoughts.

Tim was scaring them, which only made him feel worse than he was already feeling. But he couldn't help it.
Everytine he tried to push the thoughts away, he was swarmed with the image of Alex laying on the cold ground in a pool of his own blood, bleeding out with his neck sliced open. It was haunting.

"Hey...Tim...? You should get up and eat..." Jay said from the other side of the door, voice soft and worried. Tim flinched at the tone, getting up to open the door.

The sight of Tim made Jay's heart ache. He looked so...sickly. He looked like he hadn't slept in months. "Oh, Tim..." Jay said sadly.
Tim just looked at him blankly, eyes void of emotion. "I don't want to eat..." he said, voice rough. It was almost like Masky talking instead of Tim.

((Authors Note: Have you guys ever seen Repo!The Genetic Opera? If not, look it up on YouTube with "Tonight We Are Betrayed" and it will make sense what I mean about the voice change.))

Jay flinched softly but looked at him with those doe eyes. He was so worried for him. "You need to eat something, Tim...you will get sick if you don't..." he said.
Tim just shrugged, not saying a word. He couldn't care less if he got sick...he wanted to be dead anyways. He figured he would hurt less people if he died.

After all, it was his fault that Jay and Brian were there with him. He dragged them into this hell hole and ruined whatever good life they had before.

Jay teared up a bit, "Tim, please...Brian and I are really worried about you..." he said sadly. Tim scoffed, "Why, huh? Why are you worried about me? I ruined your guys' lives. I dragged you here and now you two can't even go back to being somewhat normal...and its my fault..." he said.

"So, yeah, be sorry for me all you want. But trust me when I say that if I were not around, everyone would be better off." said Tim, voice full of emotion. He could only hold back so much, after all.
"But Tim--" "No, Jay! I don't see why you even still love me! I am no good! I let you get killed and then you.were dragged back to life because The Øperator was following me! I never wanted anyone to go through what I went through and everyone did! Alex died, at my hands, because I came into his life! Jessica can't even live like a normal person anymore and she's god-knows-where now!" he yelled, groaned and tugging his hair. His breathing quickened and he shook a bit.

"I killed him. I sliced his throat open and let him die slowly because I thought it would end things. I'm no better than he was. I-It was always my fault and I killed him. He could have changed his life. He could have turned things around but he can't now and its my fault...!" he said, voice full of panic as he used his forearms to cover his ears while he yanked and scratched at his hair.
Jay flinched, reaching out to reassure Tim, "Y-You did what you had to..." he said softly.

Tim flinched away, "Don't touch me! I-I'll hurt you too!" he stumbled back a bit, "I-I can't--" he didn't even finish his sentence as he took off out the door and into the forest. He needed to leave.
He didn't want to hurt anyone else. He would make sure he didn't hurt anyone else.

Alex was right. All of this would be over if he was dead. He fished through his pocket and found his pills. Nearly full...he tore the bottle open and dumped the pills into his hand. He swallowed them down as quickly as he could.
He kept walking through RossWood, feeling dizzy and numb. Masky kept trying to push through, just to get him some help.

Tim kept him away, going to sit by the little creek in the forest. What a lovely view to be his last...

He heard footsteps behind him and smiled sadly. It was probably Jay or Brian...or maybe even The Øperator. "If you are here to try and drag me back, I'm not going..." he said simply, tossing his empty bottle of pills behind him to whoever's it was feet.

The man behind him chuckled, "Not here to try to..." he said, bending over and picking up the bottle. "Surprised you actually did it, Tim..."

Tim flinched and paled. That voiced sounded so familiar...almost like..."A-Alex?" he stuttered, jumping up and spinning around.
Alex chuckled, "Yeah...you left me with some nasty scars." he said, showing him his stitched up neck. "I was lucky that groundskeeper came inside."

Tim glared before stumbling back and falling, forced to sit back down. "N-No, you had to of died..." he said.
Alex laughed, "I was dead. You know that thing that was following us? Yeah, he, uh...offered me a 'job' of some kind." he said, huffing a bit. "I didn't want to be dead, so, I accepted his offered."

Tim's vision was starting to go dark. He felt sick. He wanted someone to find him now...he wanted them to see Alex. He heard two sets of footsteps running to him, feeling Jay drop next to him and keep him up.
Brian stood next to him, seeing Alex and tensing up. He pulled out a gun, pointing it right at him.

"N-No, wait..." Tim said, "The Øperator brought him in..." Jay and Brian looked at each other, both shocked he would do something like that.
Brian hesitantly lowered the gun. Alex tossed him the empty bottle, "I suggest you lead me to where ever the hell we are staying and get Tim some help." he said. He would have been happy to just let Tim die...but, he couldn't let that happen. He didn't know why.

"So...you were the one that sent that box of tapes and the letter?" Brian asked coldly. Alex nodded, helping him get Tim up, "Yeah. I wasn't even sure if you guys were alive." he said.

They all walked back, Jay clung to Tim to make sure he would be okay. This wasn't the first time he had seen Tim nearly overdosing in his meds...but it scared him each time. He was always afraid he would lose Tim.

"So, tell me this. Why does he want us?" Alex asked. Brian hummed, "He just uses us as guards. People that know too much...people that are snooping where they shouldn't be...its our job to keep them away. He takes in broken souls...people that don't have a purpose anymore." he explained, "There are more than just us, you might actually like them."
Alex just hummed. He wasn't sure if he liked the sound of that...but it wasn't like he really had a choice anymore. He tried to leave RossWood once already and he blacked out. He woke up feeling like he had been beaten to death.

But, maybe this would end up being okay...it couldn't be any worse than always being dead or in a constant state of paranoia.
And maybe...maybe he could make up for all the wrong he ended up doing.