Title: What they call home pt. 7|7 - Pride [Final]

Pairing: Post Azkaban!Sirius Black x Female!Lestrange!Reader

Word count: 2.3k

Published: 15 November, 2020

Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore

Notes: This was written for ​@wand3ringr0s3's writing challenge on tumblr and also for a request I have received here on Wattpad by celina_yaxley . It was supposed to be a one shot, but it turned into a series somehow. I have been getting carried away these days.

Disclaimer: I have dug myself very deep into the Black and Lestrange family just to make sure that there were no incest in the story. I went back 300 years, until 1700 and I can confirm Blacks have not been related to the Lestranges, except Bellatrix Lestrange (nee Black) marrying Rodolphus Lestrange around 1968-70, pre-Wizarding War I.

It's been days since you left Sirius in the kitchen and cried yourself to sleep. He has been trying to apologise to you, but you didn't even look at him. You passed him as if you couldn't hear him, you ate your meals as if he wasn't even there and you walked around the house as if he didn't even exist.

However, this tactic of yours didn't seem to make him give up, if anything he became more determined to show you how guilty he felt. He made breakfast for you in the mornings, he pushed little notes under your door, trying to make you forgive him, he even prepared candle lit baths for you. However, you were too upset to show any interest. You left the food untouched, ripped apart the notes, leaving them in front of his door and blew out the candles, before you let the water cool down.

You thought he would finally get that you were not interested in his apology, but oh were you wrong. He wasn't about to give up and it riled you up.

People make mistakes, you knew that, but he was the last person you expected to betray you, after all he should have known better how awful of a feeling it is when someone accuses you of something you haven't even done.

You were always hard-headed, and it was no different this time either. If you learned something from your family, it was definitely your pride. You didn't plan on giving in, he deserved to suffer.

It wasn't even suffering you thought, you barely started having feelings for each other and before you started getting closer, you simply ignored each other's existence anyway. You believed it wouldn't be hard to go back to that again. You didn't like him before, and you were ready to unlike him to turn things around.

But of course, you were just lying to yourself, although it was still easier than to forgive him.

"Love, can we just talk finally?" Sirius caught you as you were about to ascend the stairs. Love! He called you love again. You were fed up with his pet names, the way he tried to seem affectionate, when days before he turned his back on you. You were fuming, his mere presence pissed you off. Your cheeks heated up, you clenched your jaw in anger.

"Do not ever dare to call me love." You turned around, offering your deadliest glare to the man.

"Finally, you are talking." He sighed. "Why can't you just give me a chance to explain?" He asked desperately.

You scoffed. "Because you don't deserve it. You should be the last person to turn your back on me, when you know exactly how it feels to be betrayed, to be accused of something you didn't commit. You should be the first person who doubts the accusations." You raised your voice in anger.

"The only thing I could think of was that I have been betrayed before. I couldn't think clearly. I'm so sorry. You have to understand that in that moment it was like a déjà vu feeling-" before he could have continued though, you cut him off.

"I was the one who was accused, not you. You should have stayed beside me; you should have believed me. For Merlin's sake, I was next to you the whole time, how was I supposed to give out any information? Humour someone else, Black." You hissed, his last name making him flinch.

You didn't let him talk, you rushed up to your room and slammed the door shut with a loud bang. You hurried to your bed and flopped down on it, face hidden in the duvet as you screamed into the material.

Hours passed by as you rolled around on your bed, groaning each time as his face appeared in your memories. It was like he was haunting you, as if everything was your fault. You groaned again as you turned onto your stomach, your face hidden in the duvet as you screamed how much you hated him.

You didn't though. You missed his kisses from that night, you missed his strong arms making you feel safe and cared for. You missed his pampering pecks on your heated skin, your hand getting lost in his big palms, his fingers curling around your hips as he pulled you closer.

A knock on your door stopped your daydreaming. You scolded yourself for your silly thoughts as you got up from the bed and opened the door to find no one there. You frowned as you looked around, turning left and right, not a single person in sight. As you were about to close the door, you caught sight of an envelope in front of the doorstep. You picked it up and closed your door behind you as you threw the object on your bed.

You didn't have to think twice to know who placed it in front of your door. You could easily recognise his handwriting in the front of the envelope, your name displayed as if a fifth grader wrote it, crooked and uneven.

You heaved a deep sigh, looking at the envelope as if it was your arch enemy. You wanted to see what he wrote, you read all his notes before ripping them apart too. But you were still pissed off. It's been going on for days and you understood why he reacted the way he did, he was betrayed once before, but your pride was screaming in the back of your mind that he didn't deserve your forgiveness, whilst your heart argued the opposite.

You finally sat down on the bed, getting hold of the letter, flipping it around, before you decided to open it.

My love,

Probably you will not read this letter, just like how you have thrown all my other attempts away, but I feel like it's worth a try. If you do read it, which I can't see much of a chance to, I just want you to know that I don't know what else I could do to make this up to you.

I have made a mistake and I am not trying to find excuses for that. I should have believed you and I didn't. I feel guilty and each time I see you and you pass by me as if I didn't exist reminds me how much I fucked up.

It's no secret that I like you. The night we have spent together still plays in my mind vividly and I wish nothing more than to hold you in my arms once again, to kiss you the way I have never got the chance to, to tell you that I am falling for you.

"Falling for you?" – You stopped as you reread the words ten even twenty times. You couldn't believe your eyes, your heart excitedly flattering in your chest. It couldn't be true, you thought.

I screwed up royally and every waking moment of mine is spent regretting that decision, but it happened and unfortunately, I can not turn back time. I am simply begging you to give me a second chance to show you how much you have come to mean to me, because each day without you makes me feel empty inside.

If you can find it in yourself to just consider forgiving me, even if it's not in the near future, please join me in the dining room at 7pm.

I will be waiting for you.

Love, Sirius

You didn't know what to think. You could feel his desperation, his guilt even in his letter and you honestly felt guilty for pushing him away, but you were hurt, and it was all his doing. You started reading the letter again and again, hoping to get a clear answer as to what to do, but if anything, it confused you even more.

You got up from your bed and with a deep sigh headed towards the dining room. You couldn't foresee what would happen, but you knew if you talked to him, it could help you decide what to do.

You walked down the stairs, your steps slow and calculated. You headed towards the dining room as delicious smells hit your nostrils. You opened the door to see Sirius seated at the table, his face hidden behind his palms, his elbows propped up on the table. There were all kinds of fancy food prepared on the table, only candles giving a dim light to the room.

"Hey." You greeted him as you sat down on the other end of the table, as far as you could. His head shot up, his eyes wide in surprise.

"Hi." He replied, his voice uncertain. "You read my letter." He added, unable to process your presence. You nodded in reply.

"Yes, I did. A couple of times actually." You admitted with a tiny smile hidden in the corner of your lips.

"Let's eat then." He offered with a small smile, his eyes still attached to yours in disbelief. You knew he didn't want to push you, that's why he offered to dig into the delicious food, but you weren't here to eat in an awkward silence.

"I'm actually not hungry." You spoke up as he swallowed visibly. "I came to talk."

He nodded in response. "I'm sorry. I really am, but I have run out of ideas. I don't know what else I could do to make up for my mistake." He shook his head as he kept his eyes locked with yours.

"You hurt me, you know that, don't you?" You asked.

"I do." He replied with a deep frown, his eyes filled with guilt. "And I have been trying to convince you to forgive me, but I honestly don't know what else to do. I would rather have you screaming at me, shouting at me, but the fact that you pretend that I don't exist is the worst feeling. I feel useless and I wish you could just talk to me." He stood up and headed towards your end of the table, before he took a seat beside you and got hold of your hand, gently squeezing it. You thought about pulling away, but you couldn't deny how nice his warm hand felt around yours.

"You were the last person I expected to turn against me." You said as he nodded.

"I know and I shouldn't have. I really am sorry." He apologised for the umpteenth time.

"I like you, Sirius, that hasn't changed, but how can I trust you again?" You asked, but Sirius just shook his head.

"I don't know what else to say. I'm sorry for what I did, I wish I'd never done that, but I can't do much about it now. If you could find it in your heart to forgive me, I would be the happiest man alive. If you can't, I completely understand. But that is a decision you have to make." You knew how right he was, but you were feeling as if you were stuck between the two options and you couldn't move.

You looked into his eyes, searching for the right answer, wanting to know what the best decision would be. You watched as Sirius played with your hands, interlocking your fingers, waiting for you to say something.

"Oh, screw this." You exclaimed, causing Sirius to jump slightly as you reached for his face, cupped his cheeks and attached your lips to his. He didn't return the kiss immediately, his shocked state was in need of a bit of time to understand what was happening before he finally returned your advances, kissing you back passionately.

He breathed heavily as he pulled away. "Can I take it as a step towards forgiveness?" He asked with a happy smile.

"You can." You returned his expression, your cheeks flushing red.

"I should piss you off more often." He exclaimed, still trying to organise his breathing.

"I don't think you would like that." You smiled happily as you wrapped your arms around his neck. It was a hard decision to make, but you couldn't deny how much you needed his lips attached to yours, his fingers interlocking with your digits, his arms wrapped around your waist, his face hidden in your neck. You simply needed him, and you would have been a fool not to forgive him. "But I meant it Sirius, you hurt me." You added with a sceptical look, hoping he would understand that you didn't plan on repeating the same mistakes.

"I know and I will do anything to make up for my mistake." He spoke firmly.

"Anything?" You asked with a playful grin spread across your face.

"Anything?" He asked with uncertainty.

"What do you think about bringing the food upstairs to your room?" You asked as you stood up, pulling him up into a standing position too. You wrapped your arms around his neck, his arms sneaking around your waist to pull you flush against him. "Maybe you could show me how badly you are falling for me." You giggled as he let out a heartfelt laughter, before closing the distance between your lips once again.

"We will have to stay in the room for a while then." He smirked against your lips.

"I don't mind." You breathed. He pulled away from you, getting hold of your hand as he started walking towards the stairs, taking a look at you after each step, just to make sure you weren't disappearing from his grasp.

He never ever wanted to feel like you were about to give up on him again and he was to show you just how much you meant to him. It wasn't just you who found a safe space within him, but so did he, finally experiencing home within you.

You weren't sure how or when it happened, but before you even had the time to send a letter to Molly, updating her about the events, she appeared at a particular Order meeting, pouting as she confessed knowing about you and Sirius, this time scolding you for being just an owl away.

The end!

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don't forget to like and comment on the fic. Thank you :) I do not give permission to anyone to repost my fics!