Title: Teacher's Pet

Pairing: Sirius Black x Female!Reader

Word count: 5378

Published: 11 September, 2020

Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore

Notes: The idea came to me through Melanie Martinez's song of the same title. - Before you judge by the title, please read it to the end. I didn't put warning for a reason. 

Looking at him was anything, but easy. You were trying to hide the blush creeping up on your cheeks with the cruelest thoughts you could manage to squeeze into your mind. Sitting at the desk, looking at his wondering eyes around the classroom was bearable up until his gaze met yours. You knew it meant nothing to him, but for you, even that few seconds of connection was ruthless. You were craving his attention, more than anyone's you knew. He was perfect in your eyes.

Your tongue darted out of your mouth, wetting your lips, before you bit into the lower one, trying to discard the inappropriate thoughts with the pain, but it seemed useless. You felt the irony taste in your mouth as you ran your tongue across your lower lip, licking off the blood from the freshly obtained wound.

His presence was anything but calming. If anything it made your heartbeat speed up, pulsing hard against your ribcage. You heaved a deep sigh, feeling your lips dry out as his stormy, grey eyes connected to yours once again. You couldn't comprehend, how he was unable to see the effects he had on you.

You gently bit the tip of your nail, as if it helped in distracting your overly imaginative mind. It didn't. You wanted to get close to him even though you knew how wrong that was. Being his student meant there was no place for a romantic relationship, but your mind didn't want to accept that, nor your heart wanted to listen.

You shook your head to be able to pay attention to his monologue about the subject on your N.E.W.T.s. You opened your book titled Confronting the Faceless, which was used to prepare you for your Defence Against the Dark Arts exams. The subject has been the same for the last two lessons, Inferius. You found it rather creepy, but you knew you had to study as much as you could to become an auror.

For years you were sure, you knew what you wanted to be. It was never a question. You always thought being an auror was an honour and you wanted that. But recently, you weren't sure what you wanted anymore. You sat above the book, reading through the lines, wanting to know more, but you didn't feel the determination you had before.

"You seem troubled." As you heard his voice up close, you jumped. You looked around to see an empty classroom, before returning to his seated form on the edge of your table as you lifted your head to look into those deep, grey irises. "I'm assuming you have been spacing out. It hurts to know that my classes are that boring, especially from one of my brightest students." He chuckled with a fake gasp, putting his palm across his chest as if he was in pain.

"I'm... no it's not. I was just..." You didn't even know what to say. Your mind was a mess of thoughts with not one of them making any sense.

"You have not been talking to me recently." He spoke and you could almost feel disappointment in his voice, but deep down you knew it was your mind's stupid little game only. There was a time when you always turned to him, he was your favourite teacher after all. But when you realised your feelings, you knew you had to stop it. It would have been more painful to be around him for more than necessary.

"My head is just a mess." You sighed deeply. You had feelings for your teacher, your determination for your years long dream felt lost and hope was in no way close to your heart anymore.

"Talk to me then." He put a hand on your shoulder, reassuringly. You could feel the warmth under his touch, making your breathing so much more difficult. You heaved a sigh, not knowing what to do. You bit into your lower lip, debating if you wanted to talk to him again, if you wanted to confined in him as if you were only in a mere student-teacher relationship. Then you decided to speak.

"I don't know what I want anymore." You breathed and leaned back in your chair. "I have always wanted to be an auror, it was a dream of mine. But now... I lost the drive. I don't even know why I wanted it anymore, why I studied so hard. It's like nothing makes sense anymore." You let your head drop backwards, looking up at the ceiling, feeling pathetic.

"You are young. You still have time to decide what you want." A soft smile appeared on his face as you looked at him once again.

"You are talking like you are an old man." You chuckled at him.

"I'm getting there." He grinned mischievously.

"At the age of 23, you are hardly old." You scoffed.

"How do you know my age?" He smirked with a raised brow.

"I have a broad knowledge." You returned his expression.

"No surprise, looking at your accomplishments." He nodded with a proud smile. "I'm glad I can be your teacher. But for Godric's sake, I never even thought I would ever teach." He trailed away. "Being mischievous was my thing back in the day." He spoke with a happy grin across his face, looking out the window.

"I know, you were causing problems to Professor McGonagall in every corner." You chuckled remembering back when he was still in Hogwarts as a student.

"Wait, how do you know that?" He furrowed his brows. You just laughed at his expression.

"Don't forget I was already in second year when you were in your seventh year. I was listening to your parties non stop, every Friday night. When you left, I took over your position in the Quidditch team as a beater." You explained with a huge grin, hoping to make him feel less like a teacher.

"Godric, I can't believe I am teaching someone I went to school with." He looked at you with an astonished gaze.

"I told you, you are not that old." You grinned at him.

"I'm still your teacher though." He pointed his index finger toward you with a playful smile.

"Sure..." You scoffed as you stood up to pack your books into your bags.

"Why do I have a feeling that you don't take me seriously?" He crossed his arms in front of his chest with a fake pout.

"Maybe because I still remember you pranking each and every student you found on the corridors? Maybe because I will never forget you trying to make Professor McGonagall's life miserable? Maybe because I can not remember a moment where you have ever been anything but naughty." You laughed at him. "Hell, I can't even call you Professor Black. It doesn't have a ring to it." You chuckled playfully. "But if that makes you feel any better, I am certainly a good actress. I can act as if you were a very serious teacher." You raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"Oh, what the hell. It's fun to talk to at least one of my students freely." He grinned. "The teachers are giving me a hard time anyway." He spoke in a lower voice, as if anyone could have heard him.

"I can't imagine Rem... Professor Lupin, giving you a hard time." You chuckled as you almost used your previous schoolmate, your current teacher's first name.

"You had to just find the only exception, didn't you?" He scoffed.

"What can I say? I'm brilliant." You smirked as you threw your bag over your shoulder.

"You are." He breathed. "So don't worry about having mixed thoughts and not being able to decide things just yet, okay? Just relax, it will come to you." He smiled tenderly and you returned his expression.

"Thank you." You waved and left the class room.

It was so easy to talk to him once again, but you could feel the false hopes bubbling up under your skin. You didn't want it. You knew he would have never felt anything for you and you had to get rid of those ridiculous thoughts.

You plopped down on your bed, taking deep breaths to calm your thoughts. They were of inappropriate nature and you knew how bad it was to think about such things, but Sirius was special. Even when he was a Gryffindor student, he had caught your eyes, but seeing him day after day made it so much harder. Back then you were young and foolish, you didn't know what your feelings meant. But growing up didn't just make you realise what it was, it made it hurt even more.

Instead of thinking and overwhelming your brain, you decided to head for a cold shower, hoping for your mind to clear up.

*

A couple of days later, you were walking outside, by the Black Lake, when you recognised him, sitting under a tree, his back leaning against its trunk. You halted, thinking if you could walk over, but then you shook it out of your head. You knew it could have looked bad and you didn't want to risk his job. You swallowed the deep sigh that was about to escape your lungs and headed to the opposite direction.

"Y/N." You heard his voice calling for you and you turned around. "Come!" He waved you towards him and patted the grass next to him. You quietly obliged and took a seat beside him. "Are you still troubled?" He asked. You could feel his gaze on your profile as you were watching the tiny waves of the lake.

"I try not to think about it." You shrugged. "I will figure something out at some point."

"Just take it easy and don't stress over it." You nodded in agreement and for the first time turned towards him.

"Is that a book in your hand?" You asked with raised brows and bulging eyes. You were beyond surprised. He gave you a bored look. "I didn't know you could read." You chuckled, which earned a huffing sound from him.

"What is that supposed to mean? I am your teacher, of course I can read." He chuckled with an astonished expression.

"Well, back in the day, when you were still young, I didn't see many books in your hands." You shrugged with an ever growing smirk.

"Back in the day? When I was young? Don't you think you are being rather cheeky today?" He scoffed, but his smile didn't falter.

"Well, what can I say? You told me that we could speak freely. Are you taking it back now?" You questioned with a raised brow. He bit into his lower lip, which immediately drew your attention, but you quickly diverted your eyes.

"I guess not." He smirked. "What else do you remember?" He asked softly, nostalgically.

"Other than the girls hanging off your mouth, not much." You shrugged with a playful smile, which made him throw his head back as a laughter bursted out of his lungs. As he quieted down, he removed an escaped tear from his cheek.

"Oh Godric, I feel embarrassed teaching you." He tried to organise his breathing.

"You should have thought about it when you came back to teach." You looked into his eyes for the first time and even though you could always force your gaze away, you were unable to do so. Your eyes involuntarily moved to his lips, before they returned onto those stormy grey irises. You could see the same movements from him and you were wishing that it wasn't just your mind's game again. You really wanted to feel closer to him. But it was just plain wrong.

You could see as he ran his tongue across his lower lip, which made you bite into your own, trying to force yourself out of the daze you were in. His simple actions had such huge impacts on you, you knew it was dangerous to be close to him.

"Khm..." He cleared his throat as he turned away, looking at the lake. You were glad he did so. You didn't know how long you could have fought against yourself. "I think we should go in. It will rain soon." He spoke and started standing up. You knew why he behaved in such a distracted manner. He knew just as much as you did, how inappropriate that moment was. He reached for your hand and you gladly accepted the help as he pulled you up. You rearranged your uniform, removed the winkles and started heading back to the castle, both of you in complete silence.

*

You were walking through the corridors at night, your prefect partner patrolling another part of the castle. You completely lost track of time as you were wondering around, not seeing anything suspicious.

You walked through corridors, turned corners, heaved a sigh out of boredom each time, as if that helped passing time. It was a rather dull night, out of the ordinary for most parts. Younger students were always onto something, trying to create a mess, a distraction or simply trying to explore the castle after bed time. But it was an unusually boring and eventless night.

You turned a corner again as you felt a hand on your upper arm, being pulled behind a painting. You pulled your wand out of your robe and held it against your abductor's neck, before realising the two grey eyes looking back at you.

"Excellent reflexes." He chuckled playfully. You heaved a sigh as you put your wand back into your pocket. "True to a future auror." You smiled at his comment, feeling certainly proud.

"Why did you kidnap me?" You asked as you tried to ignore the fact that the hidden little room was rather small for two people. You could feel his chest against yours, his breath fanning your face as the other wall was just about as far as the length of your arm.

"You seemed bored patrolling, I thought it would be more fun." He smirked.

"Have you been stalking me?" You asked with a cheeky grin, which caused his eyes to grow wider.

"No... No, it's nothing like that." He tried to deny it with a terrified expression across his face.

"Calm down, I'm joking." You laughed at his rather interesting act. "You do know that it's quite inappropriate for us to be hiding behind a painting, especially in such proximity." You could see even in the dim light, that his face lost its colour as it turned pale at the realisation.

"Fuck, I didn't think about that." He whispered and you could see his nervous fidgeting.

"You are lucky I am good at keeping secrets." You smiled and as you looked into his eyes, you could see that playful glint in them again.

"I guess I am." He spoke in a lower tone, keeping the eye contact.

"Did you just decide to kidnap me or you have had something in mind?" You asked. "Otherwise I will have to go back."

"Actually, you do realise that it's past midnight, right?" He asked, which caused your lips to form an 'O' before you spoke up.

"I might have lost track of time being bored." You explained as he chuckled at your clumsiness.

"Maybe you should go to bed." He spoke with more seriousness.

"Do I look like a child to you?" You raised a brow and you could see him tense at your words, but you didn't understand his behaviour. "I'm an 18 years old young woman, not a first year who has to go to bed by 10pm." You shook your head.

"I know." He whispered, a certain heaviness to his tone.

"Woah, that sounded disappointed." You chuckled at him and you could see his lips curl into a small smile too. "There it is, that almost looks like a smile." You smirked.

"Why do I feel like a reckless teenager whenever you are around?" He chuckled softly.

"For Godric's sake, you are talking like an old man again. You are 5 years older than me." You huffed, annoyed.

"Still, I'm almost 5 years wiser." He winked, which you just waved off.

"As if. The only difference between you and me, is that you will get wrinkled first." You scoffed with a smile, making him huff in surprise.

"When I said you could talk freely to me, I didn't mean you could offend me." He chuckled at his own words.

"I think you have some problems with the definition of free speech. I can basically say whatever I want." You shrugged with a smug expression across your face.

"You know what? Then you should say that you are going to bed right now." He chuckled and gently pushed you out of the portrait hole.

"I don't have to go to sleep yet." You scoffed, crossing your arms in front of your chest.

"You have a quidditch match tomorrow." He tried to reason with you.

"You are lucky to be right, otherwise I would stay here arguing." You scoffed and started heading towards the common room, without even saying another word. You could still hear his laughter and quiet 'Good luck tomorrow' behind you, which made you let that little smile crawl across your face as you waved at him with the back of your hand. You knew he was still watching, you felt his gaze on your back.

*

You were standing in the changing room of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, listening to your captain, Rogers explaining the tactics once again. His cheerful, let's give it all behaviour fired up the team, desperately wanting to beat Ravenclaw.

You flew out to the pitch, taking your positions as Cormack announced the team members. You looked towards the teacher's seats, connecting your gaze with Sirius' for a mere second, before you quickly turned away, not wanting to get suspicious looks. Madam Hooch blowed her whistle and the game started.

You dropped your bat in the air as it flipped around, before you caught it again and sent the arriving bludger towards one of Ravenclaw's chasers' broom to distract him as he was rather close to your hoops. He redirected himself, before attempting to score again. You hit the same bludger as it returned to you, this time concentrating it in front of him. He almost got hit, before he quickly changed direction again.

You flew forward as another chaser was about to attempt to score. You directed another bludger towards the girl, before she could have scored, forcing her to halt her movements. You were proud of your distracting shots, but you didn't have time to enjoy your accomplishments. You heard your captain shouting your name and as you turned, you could see a bludger closing in on you.

You didn't have time to fly away, you could barely dodge it. It hit you straight on your temple as it passed you. You felt yourself fall, but you were just about present enough to catch your broomstick with a hand, as you were hanging off of your broom. You could hear the audience scream, but you couldn't concentrate on that. You had to close your eyes as your head was pounding heavily against your skull. You felt your hand slipping and you didn't feel like you had enough energy to hold yourself.

You took a deep sigh and attempted to grab your broomstick with your other hand. It didn't go successfully for the first time, but by the second time, you forced yourself up enough to get a good grip on it. You were gasping for air as you were trying to pull yourself up, not knowing if you were able to even stay on your broom. You collected all the energy left in you, before you forced yourself back on your broom and leaned across its front, trying to get rid off the pulsing feeling in your head.

You could feel a hand on your back and as you slowly turned around, you saw a blurry Rogers with a questioning look.

"Are you okay?" He asked, but you weren't sure what to say. You could barely keep yourself on your broom. "Can you do it?" He asked and you took a deep sigh, sitting back straight on your broom, trying to shake off your double vision. You nodded as an answer, but he was still looking at you, waiting for a confirmation.

"I'm fine." You whispered, having no energy to even talk. He nodded at you and went back into position. You flew down to pick up your bat from the ground, before returning to your place.

You could barely stay awake, it was one of the hardest matches you have ever had, but when Rogers got hold of the snitch and Madam Hooch blowed her whistle, you felt relief. You won both the match and the Quidditch cup. You smiled happily as the others cheered and landed first on the ground. Lightheadedness was the least of your problems as you found it hard to even walk. You didn't even have energy to change your cloths, you headed straight towards the common room, wanting to just lay down.

You felt dizzy as the headache pounded harder against your skull. You wanted to walk straight, but your feet betrayed you. You shook your head numerous times, you kept blinking frantically, trying to force your double vision away, but it was stubborn against you. You kept your hand on the wall as you walked through the corridor, trying to keep yourself steady. It was only an option until your legs gave in. You felt your knees bend under you, your vision becoming even more blurry, before you slid down by the wall, closing your eyes, wanting nothing more than to sleep.

"Y/N!" You heard a deep voice, but you couldn't recognise it anymore. You were slowly giving in against your tiredness.

*

As you were regaining your consciousness, you could feel someone's presence and a warm hand against your arm. You turned to the side for a more comfortable position and heaved a deep sigh. You tried to open your eyes, but you weren't successful at your first attempt. You could still feel your pulsing headache, but this time it was less painful, less distracting.

"Y/N." You could have sworn that you heard Sirius' voice, but you ignored your thoughts. It was too surreal even for your overly imaginative mind. You attempted to open your eyes again, this time with more luck. You could just about see his grey eyes as a light smile forced its way onto your face.

"Hey..." You greeted him with a deep hoarse voice you didn't know you had. You could see as he took a deep breath and exhaled before smiling himself as he crouched next to you.

"You scared me." He spoke in a soft tone, before hinting a light kiss on your forehead. You were craving for his attentive behaviour and that kindness he gave you melted you inside. He lingered against your skin longer, but you didn't mind. You enjoyed his closeness more than you were supposed to.

"I'm okay." You whispered in a powerless state.

"Are you sure?" He pulled away, making you miss his touch. "You took a heavy hit. I'm not even sure how you managed to get yourself back on that broom." He caressed your cheeks gently and you involuntarily closed your eyes and let yourself enjoy his touch.

"I don't even know." You spoke lowly, not being able to manage more than what was necessary.

"Do you want me to take you to the hospital wing?" He asked and you opened your eyes to look around.

"Where am I?" You asked as you saw the unfamiliar room. You forced yourself into a seated position, with a deep growl as you felt lightheaded again.

"Be careful." He said as he placed a hand on your back. "It's my room. I just panicked and brought you here." He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Woah, you don't waste time with dates, huh? Straight to the bedroom." You chuckled as he rolled his eyes at you.

"You wish." He smirked and you raised an eyebrow. You didn't even realise how impossibly close he was to you. You felt your heartbeat speed up, a lump appearing in your throat as you swallowed hard. You licked across your lips as you felt them getting dry at the uneven breathing your lungs produced. He followed every little movement of yours with his curious gaze, lifting his hand once again and caressing your cheeks. You put your hand on top of his, leaning into his palm, finally feeling his touch again. You wanted to stay in that moment, but he didn't let it continue. "Khm..." He cleared his throat. "You seem to be rather healthy to me." He pulled his hand away quickly and turned to look at your temple, where the bludger hit you.

"I told you I was fine. It's just a headache and a little bump." You shrugged, trying to calm your heart down with deep breaths.

"I'm glad you are fine. That hit was nasty." He looked back at you again.

"What can I say? I'm a hard-headed person." You smiled.

"That we know." He returned the expression. You were certain that he felt something for you. It couldn't have been a coincidence that you always crossed path. You wanted to believe that you were right. You wanted to know what that was between you. However before you could have spoken up, the door opened abruptly.

"Hey Padfoot, I..." Remus Lupin was standing in the doorway with a confused expression across his face. "What is going on here?"

"I..." Sirius started, but he was unable to finish his sentence. He kept mumbling under his breath, incoherent words leaving his mouth.

"I passed out and Professor Black helped me." You spoke up, removing the blanket from your body and putting your feet on the floor in front of the couch you were lying on. "I'm feeling better, so I will be going now." You continued as you put on your shoes. "Thank you Professor." You waved and left the room as the door closed behind you harshly. You stayed on the side, back against the wall, wanting to hear what was going to happen.

"Are you insane?" Remus shouted at his friend.

"Nothing happened, Moony." Sirius replied, anger clearly showing in his voice.

"Well, better not. She is your student, you dumb man." He retorted.

"I know!" He shouted back. "I'm not stupid. I wouldn't do anything to her."

You heaved a sigh and decided to walk away. You didn't want to know, you didn't want to hear it. You just wanted that suffocating lump to disappear from your throat, you wanted the pricks to stop hurting your eyes, you wanted the heavy weight off your chest. You rushed to the Gryffindor common room and headed straight to your dorm, ignoring the celebrating quidditch team. You were tired and you were in both emotional and physical pain. You just needed to rest.

*

You were sitting on the Hogwarts Express, with a certificate full of Outstandings and Exceeds Expectations, leaving the school that was your home for seven years. You were emotional for numerous reasons. You had to learn to grow up. You were ready to become an auror, you were ready to be a proud, talented magician with skills that people admired. You were ready to take on the world. But it was hard. Hogwarts was there for seven years, providing you with a home. You found friends, you learned new things, you broke rules, you got detentions, you became a prefect, you played in the quidditch team and you experienced love. The montage of your seven years was long and eventful. A time you would never be able to forget. But most of all Him.

Sirius barely talked to you after you left his room. He kept a distance, he only spoke to you when it was necessary and he avoided you when you tried to get close to him. You were heart broken, but you knew it was something that you were supposed to experience eventually. You just never thought it would hurt this bad.

Your friends' happy laughter filled in the train compartment. You were looking out the window, smiling at their happy noises, watching as the King's Cross Station's platform appeared in your view, indicating the end of a chapter.

As you got off, you hugged each other, not wanting to let go.

"We will write to each other, right?" You asked and everyone was happily nodding along in agreement. Friendships got you through hardships and you intended to keep them close to you as long as you could.

You walked out of the station as your friends disappeared, but before you could have stepped forward, you felt lips against your own as the person's body pushed you to a wall. Your eyes widened as you recognised Sirius' face. Without hesitation you closed your eyes and kissed back, giving yourself to the idillic moment. You hungrily returned his kiss, digging your fingers into his long locks, pulling him even closer, losing all the air in your lungs.

He pulled away, leaving you breathless, his forehead against yours.

"I have been waiting for that forever." He breathed heavily against your lips. "Would have been awkward if you didn't kiss back." He smirked.

"I was debating." You lied with a cheeky grin across your face.

"But you did after all." He looked into your eyes and for the first time you didn't feel the need to turn away.

"Why did you ignore me recently?" You asked, curiosity getting the worst of you.

"I had no choice. Remus knew that I had feelings for you and believe me, he gave me a lecture about it. A very long one." You chuckled at his articulation. "I knew how wrong it was to fall in love with a student of mine, but I couldn't do anything about it. The only way out was for me to ignore you until you graduated. And I'm not your teacher anymore after all." He smirked happily.

"Wait... what was that part you just said about love?" You asked giggling, before he pulled you in for another kiss, smiling into it.

"I said I fell in love with you." He whispered against your lips.

"How do you know that I have feelings for you? I might have just wanted to enjoy a little forbidden fling." You raised your brows questioningly.

"As I said, I have 5 years of experience on top of yours." He chuckled, knowing well how you felt about him.

"You will never let me forget that, right?" You asked playing with his hair in between your fingers.

"Not a chance." He smiled against your lips, before hiding his head in the crook of your neck, heaving a deep sigh. "I love you."

"And I love you." You kissed his temple lovingly. It was definitely worth the wait and you would do it all over again, even if it was wrong in so many ways.

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don't forget to like the chapter. Thank you :) I am also taking requests. If you have any, please just let me know.

I do not accept requests with suicide, suicidal thoughts and self-harm. I'm sorry, but those are subjects, that I do not cover for personal reasons. Anything else, let me know.