Chapter 12 (Tessa)
"A walk on the wild side? I'm scared to ask."
"Come on, Tess. Live a little."
"I think between throwing a drink at both you and Molly, kissing you for the first time under the stars, having Molly humiliate me with that bucket of water, and then grinding against you in your bed, wearing your clothes, I've lived enough in the last twelve hours. Wouldn't you agree?"
"Things do seem to get more complicated when you're around." Hardin chuckles.
"I think I better just get back to the dorm. I have a lecture from Emma waiting for me."
"And there's absolutely no way I can convince you to come with me?"
"Tell me where we're going."
"Nope. You have to agree first, then I'll show you."
"Is that your go to move? You already used that line on me last night."
"No. This is my go to move." Hardin tucks my hair behind my ear and gently caresses my cheek before leaning in for a kiss. Damn, he's good.
"Fine..." I groan.
"I knew I'd break you." He smirks.
"But it better not be too wild."
"Don't worry, Theresa, I think you'll approve," he says and gives me that sinful smile again.
Hardin and I leave the frat house, get into his car and he drives us back to campus.
"Hardin? Did you change your mind? Are you going to drop me off at my dorm after all?"
"Nope. This is where we're going."
"I don't understand."
"Would you just let go of control for one minute, Theresa? Just trust me."
"I don't like to lose control," I huff.
"Unless you're in my bed, rubbing yourself against me." He smirks.
"Shush!" I shout and hit him in his arm.
"Ouch!" He chuckles. "You like it rough. I'll remember that."
Hardin and I get out of the car and walk through the university, until we reach the library.
"This is where you're bringing me? The library? How is that walking on the wild side?"
"It is when you have to break in."
"What?!"
"The library is closed today. We're going to break in."
"You're not serious."
Hardin stares at me for a moment.
"Of course you're serious." I sigh. I look away as Hardin starts to jiggle and pick at the library door lock. I want to be able to deny seeing anything, in case we get caught.
"Okay, after you," he says as he holds the door open for me and gestures for me to enter.
"I can't believe I'm breaking the law." I walk into the library and I have to admit, it's pretty amazing to see it completely empty. The only noise I can hear is the echo from our shoes tapping against the floor.
"Neither can I." Hardin chuckles. "Maybe there's more to Tessa Young after all."
"What are we doing here, though?"
"I'll show you. Come with me." Hardin takes my hand and walks us to the back corner of the library. He reaches for the shelf and grabs Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens. He walks back to where I'm standing, hops on the table and motions for me to join him.
I look around, forgetting for a moment we're completely alone in the library, before joining him on the table. We reposition ourselves so that he's sitting and can read the book to me, while I lie in his arms.
"Are you comfortable?" he asks softly and I nod. He opens the book and begins reading to me. "You could draw me to fire, you could draw me to water, you could draw me to the gallows, you could draw me to any death, you could draw me to anything I have most avoided, you could draw me to any exposure and disgrace. This and the confusion of my thoughts, so that I am fit for nothing, is what I mean by your being the ruin of me."
Hardin continues to read to me and I feel so at peace in his arms, listening to his soothing voice, that I swear I could fall asleep.
"Tess?"
"Hmm?"
"Are you okay?"
"Yes." I smile up at him.
"Are you having a good time?" he asks, unsure what my answer will be.
"I really am. I-I feel so comfortable in your arms." I immediately regret saying those words the moment they leave my mouth.
"You do?" Hardin asks quietly.
"Um, yes. Is that weird? I know we barely know each other, but it just feels right to me."
"That's not weird at all. It makes me feel really happy because I feel the same. It feels like you belong in my arms. I-I just have this instinct to want to protect you and keep you safe. I don't know how to explain it."
"Believe me, I understand," I say, thinking of all the dreams that have helped guide me to this perfect moment with Hardin.
After a few moments of silence, Hardin shocks me by blurting out, "Have you ever been in love before?"
"Um, no... Have you?"
"No. I've never really let myself have any feelings toward anyone, until I first saw you. The moment I first saw you in the campus cafe, I had no idea what came over me. As soon as my eyes met yours, I felt this overpowering pull toward you. To be honest, it scared the hell out of me."
"Hardin—"
"Then when I saw you again at the frat party, the feeling only got stronger. I didn't want to let anyone have that kind of power over me, but I couldn't control myself. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I needed to know exactly who Tessa Young is."
"Hardin..." I consider confessing everything about my dreams to Hardin in this moment, but quickly change my mind. Things are finally going well between us, I don't need to scare him away by letting him think I'm crazy.
"Yes?"
"Nothing," I say quickly.
"Tessa, I hope you know by now you can tell me anything. I want to get to know you better."
I still think it's a bad idea to tell him about my dreams, so instead I muster all the courage I can and decide to tell him the truth about something else. "I'm a virgin," I quickly blurt out.
"Oh."
"Oh?" I repeat, hurt taking over my voice. I go to move out of his arms, but he only tightens them around me.
"Please stay, Tess. I didn't mean it in a bad way. I-I just feel upset when I think about what could have happened last night."
"Why?"
"Your first time should be special. It shouldn't be at the frat house during a party Molly tried to humiliate you at."
"I know," I say sadly.
Hardin turns me to look at him. "And if someday you choose to share that special moment with me, I'm going to make sure it's special enough for you to remember for the rest of your life."
"I don't understand you, Hardin."
"What do you mean?" he asks sadly.
"Why would you choose to hide this part of yourself from everyone? I never would have guessed you could be this sweet and sensitive... and romantic."
"Because no one made me want to share this part of myself, until I met you."
"You keep saying things like that and you'll definitely be sharing that special moment with me," I half joke and immediately blush when I realize what I just admitted.
Hardin lets out a laugh. "You're so forward, Theresa. I better keep my eye on you."
My face continues to flush and I try to change the subject. "It's late. We should probably go before we do get caught."
"You're probably right."
Hardin puts the book back on the shelf and we sneak out of the library. Luckily no one sees us.
As we walk through the university, back to Hardin's car, I say, "Thank you for today. It was really special to me."
"It was special to me, too, Tess. And just so you know, I've never broken into the library with anyone else before. Only you." He smiles at me and his dimples pop.
"I'm not sure if I'm supposed to thank you for that." I giggle.
Once we're back in Hardin's car, he immediately starts driving.
"Hardin, where are we going now?"
"I'm taking you to dinner." He smiles.
"Dinner? So, today is like our first date then?"
"I'd like to think so, if that's okay with you."
"It's more than okay," I say happily and I can't help the giant smile that spreads across my face.
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