I'm v stressed :(( I'm trying to handle moving house, a job and starting another new job all at once. Yesterday I had an argument with a housemate too so I'm like emotionally AND physically tired. Oh and I can't forget to mention I haven't got Internet. I'm working on my limited 4G... Hopefully once I actually move in to my new place and all this is over I will update this book more regularly!!

Keith was blasting some emo song through his headphones and drawing when his phone vibrated next to him. At first, he ignored it. He favoured his strokes against the page as he drew the monster that haunted him at night. It didn’t resemble anything human- instead, it had spikes on its arms, red eyes and massive, lion-like claws. It was strong enough to crush Keith with its pounce or scratch him until he bled to death.

As he drew the third spike on the monster’s arm, he found his eyes diverting to his vibrating phone. He couldn’t help but wonder who was texting him. The only option he could come up with was the unknown number. Reminding himself it was the popular kids playing a prank, he pressed his pencil harder against the page. He let his anger fuel him.

Then it vibrated again. The second vibration made him jerk out his arm to pick up the device and read the messages. He couldn’t help himself.

U: I'm bored

U: Oi Keef

Keith rolled his eyes, hating “Keef” more than anything else in the world. Still, he felt compelled to reply. Maybe he wanted to see where the conversation went; maybe he was curious about the unknown texter or maybe he was just crazy. 

K: Do something then

U: Like what

K: I don't know

U: You're a helpful one aren't ya

K: I'm sorry, I don't know what you like to do for fun

Chewing his lip, Keith looked over at his bookcase. It was full of cheap, second hand books he had found at car boots or charity shops but he loved it as if each one was brand new. 

K: I'd just read a book or something 

U: Ew… reading

K: Video games then

K: I don't know, it just feels good to shoot a man in the head every once in a while

K: Don't take that out of context

U: Hahahaha, you're so cute

No. Keith wasn't blushing. He just wasn’t used to being complimented.

U: I guess I could play some crash bandicoot

U: I started playing it again a while ago and never finished because I have the attention span of a brick

K: How many times have you played it then?

U: At least 50 times

K: God

K: And I thought I played Pokémon Leaf Green a lot

U: OMG WHICH STARTER IS YOUR FAVE

The capital letters seemed a bit much but, regardless, the edges of Keith’s lips began to perk up. It was endearing to see excitement, especially after coming home to his depressed dad and having to cope on his own every day. Even if the unknown number was messaging as a dare, it was still making Keith smile and that was a wonderful thing. He couldn’t remember the last time he smiled.

Pokémon used to make him smile too. He remembered getting a silver gameboy for his birthday and he played it for hours. Both him and his dad would play at the same time and see who could beat gyms first or whose Pokémon fainted the most. His dad would choose Bulbasaur but Keith was more of a Charmander kind of guy. Sadly, the nostalgia only made Keith’s stomach hurt. His recent memories of his dad involved crying and arguing about paying rent or his dad’s new therapist. Keith missed the good times more than anything.

K: Charmander probably

U: SQUIRTLE ALL THE WAY

U: Have you played crash before

K: Uh I played the originals on my dad's old PlayStation when I was little

Yet another memory that brought longing tears to Keith’s eye.

K: I was never very good

U: Well I'm great

K: Cocky much

U: Yup :P

K: What else do you play then?

U: I'm not the biggest gamer.. I only have a Switch so

K: Fair enough

U: Yeee

U: Gotta love some Nintendo, am I right

K: Sure

U: What else are you into?

U: Not sexual things I mean hobbies

K: I knew you meant hobbies… I'm a bit boring if I'm honest. I like to draw sometimes I guess

U: That's awesome!!! You have to show me sometime 

Yeah, Keith did consider snapping a picture of his current monster and sending it the unknown number’s way but his sanity kicked in just in time. It would make wonderful bullying material.

Anyway, his drawings of shadows and monsters were creepy enough to get him sent to a mental asylum. He favoured the darkest tones possible and dented the page with his strokes for effect. The pages screamed anger, fear, loss… It came from a place Keith never wanted anyone else to see.

K: I'd rather not… I like to keep it private

U: I get it

U: I try to write poetry every so often lol

K: Wait what really

U: Yeah… is that weird

K: No I think it's pretty cool

Keith knew this was a prank. There was no way anyone in his school would be interested in him and smart enough to write poetry. 

U: Aw thank you

U: I haven't told anyone else because it's quite embarrassing 

U: Like my friends know I'm romantic but not that I write dumb poetry about my crushes

K: It sounds sweet

U: I'm glad you think so

U: Hold on

K: Okay

U: Your eyes are a deep blue
It reminds me of the ocean 
It holds so many secrets
Mysteries that almost define you

Shadows accentuate your features
You're a princess who needs rest
Take a deep breath with me
You extravagant little creature 

My heart beats with an intention
You follow me through my dreams
A map for my lost mind
Yearning for your sensation

Keith's mouth fell open as he traced the words. His stomach was bubbling with butterflies, worsening with each syllable. He had never been a fan of poetry but the stanzas seemed to speak to him on another level. They were like multiple hands reaching out to massage his skin, loosening his muscles enough to find relaxation. 

So someone at his school did write poetry and, maybe, just maybe, they were interested in him.

U: Ugh I know it's not great, I wrote it super quickly 

K: No no it's good! Sorry for taking so long to respond I was just letting it sink in

U: Thank you

K: I like the map for a lost mind line, it's sweet 

U: Yeah, it's just like… I never feel like I belong. I feel lost and you kind of guide me towards the true meaning of being alive

K: I assume you mean you as in your crush lol

U: Well yeah

U: But I told you the first time we spoke. It's you. You're my crush 

Keith let out a shallow snort. He was just starting to view the unknown number as genuine but then he mentioned the crush again. As if anyone would ever like Keith. He blended into the crowd with his black clothing and silent mouth. He was only ever recognised for the wrong reasons. The gay one. The nerd. The emo.

That was enough today, he decided. He placed his phone on top of his bedside table and never texted back.