“And I win!” I cheered jumping about on the lounge.

“That’s a white couch you’re jumping all about on!” Liam warned through laughter as he tossed his Wii remote away.

I shrugged as I jumped about “Who cares, mum will just buy a new one.”

Liam shrugged before grabbing our box of pizza and throwing it face down upon the lounge making me gasp and choke on a spurt of laughter. “Oh, my bad.” Liam played his voice full of mock innocence.

I couldn’t help the bubble of laughter that passed my lips as I collapsed down beside him on the couch “We’ve had a good game today, you kicked my mum in her imaginary balls and I kicked your ass at golf!” I sang smugly.

Liam rolled his eyes “It’s Wii golf there’s a difference, I bet if it was actual golf I'd win.”

I shrugged “I haven’t ever played golf before so it wouldn’t be real justifiable.”

Liam looked at me “Really? You’ve never played?” he asked as if that was startling “What about mini golf? You’ve played that at least right?”

He was met by silence.

“Oh my god!” he cried as if I had made a crime “You can’t be serious!”

“What? What?” I cried getting defensive.

“You haven’t gone mini golfing, I mean oh my god!” he cried sounding now like an utter and total girl.

“Shut up! Shut up!” I shouted.

Liam chuckled “Alright, I’ll make you a deal.”

“I’m listening.” I smiled with narrowed eyes.

“I’ll take you min golfing” I gasped “but in return I want another free chance at dropping pizza by accident on the new couch she gets.”

I smiled cheekily up at him with a wink “Deal.”

                              ೋღ♥ ღೋ ೋღ♥ ღೋ ೋღ♥ ღೋ ೋღ♥ ღೋ ೋღ♥ ღೋ ೋღ♥ ღೋ

“Why did I have to say yes?” I groaned into my pillow, burying my face in it deep as I bit back a shrill scream of frustration.

It wasn’t rocket science to me on why I said yes I mean it was Liam; if he asked me to jump off a bridge I’d do it even without a lead. That boy was bad news for me, not because he was a bad boy – though I had to admit he had that sexy edge to him if the image of him fighting with Falan was any proof – but simply because that boy could control without even laying his eyes on me. So it was no surprise at all that after coming to my aid, treating me like the most fragile and precious creature and not to mention being pressed right up against him, skin to skin and his spicy manly scent wafting and dazing my senses that I was going to stupidly succumb into him and say yes.

“You’re such a loser.” I mumbled to myself, my words slurred against the thick pillow, my fingers curling into my pillow ‘till my knuckles turned white.

It wasn’t the fact that I hated Liam or didn’t want to go that caused me to be so pissed at myself, far from it actually. It was the fact that I caved to the weakness, I had promised myself that I wouldn’t go, that I wouldn’t cave into Liam. All that would come from it would be a heart ache full of pain. I hated how weak and vulnerable I was around him, how I could so easily succumb how I could so easily look forward to the date.

I was excited, jittery and just so drunkenly happy of what was to come tonight. I had walked through the front door of my house for the first time in my entire life to have a genuine and blissful smile upon my face within this cold and deserted house. This house finally held a good memory, something so happy instead of miserable and so stripped and I was going to cherish it. I had skipped and danced my way upstairs to my room where I instantly went to my cupboard in my room searching for the ‘perfect’ outfit tonight that for once would have roles reversed and have Liam weak in the knees.

That’s how I ended up face first in my pillows screaming in frustration at myself and resisting the urge at punching my pillow. Because it was in that moment dancing through my walk in closet that mum had insisted on getting me as her way of showing her somewhat love – through money – that I realized this was the happiest I’d ever been, that this was exactly where I wanted to be, in love and giddy with the boy that had held my heart since the day in daycare he’d called me a sissy girl.

So why was I running?

***

“No, no, gay, stupid, awful, why did I even buy this?” I blanched in sheer irritation.

I stood in my walk in closet flicking through countless and countless bits and pieces of clothes on the racks, my rough flicking and pulling at the clothes breaking the stony and nerve racking silence throughout the entire house. No matter how many clothes I flipped through it seemed to just get more and more painful and useless. Suddenly I was the bearer of the most awful and un-wearable clothes on the entire planet. I had all this money, my mother’s unlimited supply of money and here I was with the most dog ugliest clothes on the planet!

I was becoming more and more agitation, I couldn’t find any clothes, Liam would be here soon and a bunch of my clothes had fallen off their coat-hangers and were in a tumble mess on the floor, causing me to stumble and trip. Grumbling and muttering under my breath – my mind picturing myself sharing a sheer close resemblance to a troll – I kicked my clothes away muttering some more as I bit back a shrill scream of frustration. I became even angrier as I got a text message from Liam.

Liam: I’ll be at yours ready to pick you up in about fifteen minutes. Can’t wait to see you gorgeous! X

I looked at the phone torn by my emotions; I couldn’t help the shiver of delight at his words, the sheer thrill at simply knowing I was going to see him, let alone the fact that he’d added the word gorgeous and an ‘x’ and all. I felt like a star struck teenager that had finally got to meet their celebrity crush and the fact alone disgusted me. I didn’t want to be one of those pathetic teens that frolicked all over males with a pitiful obsession. Those girls made the female population look like some vulnerable, weak and zero dignity fools. Yet suddenly I was one of them and I couldn’t deny that I lusted over the feel of the thrill and the swarm of butterflies in the pit of my stomach. Maybe it was a sacrifice you had to make, if you wanted to step in the footsteps of being loved you had to let yourself become one of those teens.

The only question was, was the sacrifice worth it when at the end you are at risk of losing not only that teen spirit but all spirit if that love doesn’t last?

I threw my phone on the bed watching it as it buried deep within the blankets; the other part of me was in sheer nerves and frustration. He was going to be here earlier than planned when I noted the time being six and he had told me six thirty. Not to mention the fact that I still had no clothes picked out and he hadn’t even told me where we were going. How am I meant to know if I needed something fancy, casual or even something for more of a workout? The idea sounded somewhat stupid in my head and yet you could never tell, it was Liam, he was always full of surprises.

So I simply just gave up, I stormed into the bathroom off my room and decided if I couldn’t choose clothing I’d go to messing and fussing with my hair and makeup like some vain teenager. I spent the next minutes letting my black hair curl down around my face in loose tendrils with the magic of my curling wand. I than lined my eyes as per usual with some mascara and eyeliner in the corners to make my fern green eyes stand out against my skin. I looked at myself in the mirror and couldn’t help but be disappointed, I looked like this any other day. I wanted something to mark it as a more special occasion, but how?

My eyes caught sight of something shiny and I realized it to be the gold glint on the tube of lipstick, my favorite lipstick. Blood red. I couldn’t help the large smile that cut along my lips; the simplest thing – lipstick – just made me happier, content and purely numbed the nerves and frustration. With new eagerness and excitement I coated my lips with the blood red and suddenly I was excited, so excited I just wanted to scream.

So that’s what I did, turning on my stereos I blared them for the first time, letting the volume go high on my stereo as I realized that I had a reason to now play such music in an empty house. I felt like I was christening this house with happiness, for the first time I was letting the colors in this house stand out, giving it some light and freshness as for once it didn’t seem like a prison. Turning them up a little higher, louder I danced back into my room and whilst jumping onto my bed and running along it, not before enjoying the height and being able to sing and dance to the music. I sang a little louder, danced a little wilder before skipping into my walk in closet.

I don’t know how long I stood there, talking to myself and singing as I tried to find something to wear in maybe a different light, maybe feeling this light and free I’d be able to choose, be able to see. Logic guided me to black skinny jeans, you could dress it up or down and it was a pair that I lived in. so I had pants but now I needed to find something to go on top, but what?

I spent God knows how long contemplating over it, with lips pursed and a hip popped up as I furrowed my brow in deep concentration. Time passed until I’d pick up a shirt and then toss it away, deeming it unworthy, I really needed to go on a shopping spree.

“Which one, which one.” I sang, talking to myself as I flipped through some tops again.

“I personally liked that shirt of yours with the cute little penguin wearing shades.” A voice behind me mused.

I jumped startled as I whirled around sharply, my breath caught. My wide eyes fell on Liam leaning against the doorway of my closet with his arms folded and an utterly bemused expression upon him with that sinful smile upon his lips. He had on a pair of jeans that hung loose on his hips and with that dark blue shirt of his I loved on him, his brown shaggy hair was askew as having ran his fingers through his hair. Oh how I wished it was my fingers and not his.

No matter what, seeing Liam standing there, smiling softly at me with those gorgeous soft hazel eyes had my breath catching, I couldn’t deny it. He stole my breath in that cheesy teenage way, a rush of excitement shivering it’s way right down to my toes making them curl in the plush carpet. I couldn’t resist him forever I realized in that moment; I had already fallen too deep. But as my stubborn self I was going to resist as long as I could, saving myself for as much as I could ‘till the terror came after the bliss of love. Because even if Liam didn’t purposely hurt me he would, it was inevitable, I was always going to be a broken girl.

The feel of fabric face palming me bought me out of my induced thoughts of love and heartbreak. I swatted it away as I gave a soft yelp as it hit the floor. “What the hell?” I cried out at him.

Liam chuckled naughtily a smug expression upon his face as he lazily watched me, still against the doorframe “What? It’s the shirt you should wear.” He shrugged innocently.

I rolled my eyes at him “Doesn’t mean you can attack me.” I grumbled as I picked up a shoe off the floor and pegged it at his head “Jerk!”

Liam muffled a laugh as he ducked right at the perfect timing out into my room and out of shooting range and sight. I slammed the door “Yeah, you better run!” I shouted.

Listening to the bell of laughter bouncing off the walls of my bedroom I couldn’t hold back the smile that grew across my lips and I bit back a giggle. A giggle by yours truly, now that was a myth, a legend. Smiling to myself and doing a little head dance I picked up the shirt of mine he thought was cute and pulled it on, the vibrant purple and the little penguin utterly cute and quirky just like Liam had said. I didn’t care though if he told me a garbage bag on me would look cute, sadly I’d probably wear it. I guess that’s what love is.

Walking out of the closet after pulling myself together and righting myself I walked out feeling suddenly shy, utterly and completely shy as I avoided his gaze. I could feel his gaze on me and suddenly I felt insecure under his gaze as I tugged on the bottom of my shirt. “See, cute.”

I smiled shyly, the corner of my lip tugging up as I curled my toes into the carpet “Yeah, the penguin is pretty cute.” I smiled greater as my eyes traced the outline of the cute little penguin wearing shades.

“I wasn’t talking about the penguin sunshine.”

I sighed in mock disappointment “You’re so corny.”

Liam shrugged smugly “Sensitivity captures the heart.”

I shot him a smug look, my lips curving up “Yeah, but I got news for you; I’m not that kind of girl.”

Liam sighed dramatically “Aw shoot, back to the drawing board than.”

I laughed as I searched for shoes “Was it just me or did you turn a little bit hillbilly there?”

“They don’t call me Cletus for nothing love.” He choked with the most god awful hillbilly impression going.

I laughed loudly, the feeling beyond amazing “Okay than, let’s hurry it up Cletus. If this night goes well maybe Pa will give you his blessing.” I chorused back with a thick yokel as we made my way out of my bedroom and to the steps.

“He’s my Pa too.”

“Ew! You’re such a sicko!” I cried in laughter as I shoved his shoulder and raced down the stairs before him so he couldn’t shove me.

“What?” he laughed “That’s what the country bumpkins do! They drink moonshine, wear overalls and marry their siblings, I mean why do you think they sound like this?” he asked with an awful yokel as he drew it out.

I rolled my eyes trying not to laugh at his words “That’s mean, not to mention awfully stereotyped.” I chided him with difficulty.

Liam paused “Sorry mum.”

It took me ‘till I saw the glimmer of a tug at the corner of his lips ‘till I understood what he was secretly implying “Ew! So I am dating you, I'm your mum and yet we still have the same fathers? Is that even possible?” I cried in utter disgust.

Liam scrunched up his nose in thought, looking utterly adorable “Well maybe….Well if….It could work like….I….” he fought trying to wrap his mind around it cutely, making my lips twitch into a smile. His eyes suddenly grew “Oh I know! Maybe if- Hey you’re house phone’s flashing.” He was caught off guard as he pointed pass me and into the kitchen to where the house phone flashed, telling me there was a voicemail.

Suddenly my mood simmered at that idea “Yeah, it’s probably mum.” I lied rolling my eyes. I knew for sure it wasn’t her; I already listened to her message right on at three thirty like every other day. I knew deep down it was my other parent that was even more neglectful than my travelling, workaholic mother.

Liam grunted saying nothing else. Yet he didn’t need to, I knew damn well what Liam’s thoughts of my mother were, let alone what it would be in relation to my sperm donor of a father. He learnt gradually and finally to bite his tongue once realizing that the more he mentioned and bad mouthed my misfit family and or rather lack of family the more it just haunted and rubbed salt into the wounds. So finally he learnt to bit his tongue and a little voice in the back of my head knew it was with the help and guidance by Ez, she was always looking out for me even when it didn’t seem it. No matter what though I knew Liam thought nothing of them and I shuddered constantly at the thought of him being locked in the same room as my mum.

“Anyways, are you going to tell me where we are going?” I asked looking over my shoulder as I picked up my handbag and keys heading for the door.

Liam smiled, back to being his handsome self “That my dear is a surprise.”

I groaned “I hate surprises and I hate you even more!” I shouted stomping out the front door having Liam chuckling in tow.

***

“I rule!” I screamed at the top of my lungs as I jumped and danced about like a mad man, gaining the attention of those all around us.

“Watch where you point that thing!” Liam cried ducking just in time as the end of the golf club nearly battered him over, muffling on laughter.

I giggled as I held my hand to my face in surprise “I’m sorry!” I yelped with a giggle, bouncing on the balls of my feet nevertheless.

“Whose wild idea was it to go miniature golfing?” he cried in disbelief.

I laughed again “I don’t know, but I must thank them. If it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t have discovered my hidden and genius talent for golfing!”

Liam rolled his eyes “This is miniature golf sweetie; this is like little leagues before you take a step up to actual golfing.” He said sighing like my lack of knowledge was adorable. The fact alone that he casually just called me ‘sweetie’ had my heart in overdrive already.

I rolled my eyes despite the goofy smile on my face “Actual golf is boring, dull. This however is utter brilliance; I mean it has the cute little windmill and the obstacle courses like that creepy clown! I mean c’mon, screw joining those old boring guys, this is where it’s fun.”

Liam laughed as he took hold of the other end of the golf stick and tugged me towards him as he drew me in by the golf club. I smiled laughing myself in such a glorious and carefree moment until my body was falling into Liam’s side and his arms snacked around my waist as he held me securely, as if knowing I’d try to wiggle myself out of his hold. But not tonight, it was my first date with Liam let alone such a special part of my life, tonight at least I wasn’t going to resist. So instead I smiled, curling a lock of hair behind my ear as I let myself curl into his side and bask in his warmth and toe curling scent.

I was so far having the best night of my life, Liam had drove to the town over just to take me to a miniature golf course having somehow remembered me telling him I’d never been. During the drive we had laughed, joked and just had fun and breathed and it was just what I needed, what I cherished. I loved the simple things of life so the drive was amazing let alone that my date was a sweet, simple and quirky surprise of miniature golf. I had jumped out of the car before it had actually stopped jumping about and cheering before dragging Liam out on the course without any equipment. Which he had pointed out laughing claiming I was an adorable child. Shoving off his statement I grabbed our gear and began kicking Liam’s ass at miniature golf.

That’s why I was jumping about screaming on the last course of this miniature golf place having just won. It was exciting and utterly fun, playing miniature golf, competing, joking about plus there was the romantic edge having played under the full moon and the starry sky. It was the best night of my life and time flew so quickly to my disappointment as we had finished the last course at about ten thirty and yet I definitely didn’t want it to ever end.

“So I think we’ve realized how oh so awesome you are.” He murmured sarcastically as he reached down and kissed the top of my head.

I elbowed him playfully loving how couple like and beautiful this all felt “What do you mean realized? I thought you’d already know by now!” I played along.

Liam chuckled before sighing “I guess we better hand these back.” he murmured holding up the sticks in gesture.

I sighed sadly, practically pouting “But I don’t wanna go.”

Liam chuckled tugging me along to the check out to hand our sticks over “It’s okay Mel, the night isn’t over yet.”

My eyes grew “What? Really? Where are we going now?” I demanded questions rather eagerly.

Liam’s lips twitched “Well I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”

I laughed “So starving you could eat a horse?” I teased.

“So starving I could eat you.” He murmured into my hair giving me a squeeze as I yelped.

“Sorry bud, but I aint edible.” I smiled poking him in the side.

Liam laughed “At least not yet sweetie.”

***

“Stop stealing my fries, it’s illegal!” I whined flicking at his hands before he could grab another handful.

“Well you stole my schnitzel!” he whined back in a childish tone.

I rolled my eyes “Correction I stole a bite of the burger. You shoving your face with fries and me taking a bite is a difference.” I argued.

Liam looked at me, just smiling with unwavering eyes.

“What?” I asked becoming suddenly so conscious as he kept just smiling at me.

Liam smiled softly “I like this, I’ve missed this.” He corrected himself as he continued gazing at me with that soft handsome smile, leaning back in his booth.

I smiled glancing down shyly in the small practically deserted café as let my pinky trace the ring of my glass of chocolate milkshake. I nodded softly, the smile still tipping at the corner of my lips “Yeah because arguing at a twenty four hour café near midnight is something I miss tragically.” I said lightly with sarcasm, biting back the truth of how I really felt.

Liam’s lips tipped and I couldn’t help but admire him about that, his ability to appreciate and smile at my sarcasm and that spindle of teen angst. I wasn’t the average and usual girl and I couldn’t help but wonder how he actually had the patience for me let alone why it was me. Why did Liam want me, the broken mess of a girl?

I watched, my breath catching as my eyes followed Liam’s hand sliding across the top of the table until his fingers curled and entwined with my own. He gave my fingers a little squeeze as he leant forward and closer to me with the table in our way and yet I could still feel his warm breath and that’s when I realized that I had subconsciously leant forward myself, our faces only a breath away.

“Tell me again why we haven’t done this before?” he murmured softly, his lips tipping.

I looked down, watching his thumb stroke back and forth along the palm of my hand his touch alone causing a ripple of a shiver of pure delight. I pursed my lips in thought trying to think of a way to answer without heading off into a bad direction, an argument. “We’ve been busy, things have been pretty crazy.”

“Yeah, speaking of which what’s been going on with you?” he asked giving me a pointed look meaning more than just a simple question “I mean, what’s been-“

“Liam….” I whispered softly.

“What is it?” he murmured softly, tenderly.

“Can just for tonight, can we have just fun? No interrogations or worry?” I asked of him softly, wanting one night were there was no salt rubbed on wounds or no arguments to taint such a special night.

“Mmmm I’d like that.” he agreed softly tugging on my fingers.

I smiled tipping the corner of my lips “Me too.”

“But you have to do something for me too.” He murmured softly watching me as I munched on a chip.

“Mmmm and what would that be?” I asked suddenly worried as to what was he was going to ask.

“You have to promise me that there won’t be any more moments of missing that or this, no more missing us.” He stressed “I don’t want us to drift apart again, I miss you.”

I looked up at him shyly under my lashes “I’d like that, a lot.”

***

The rest of the night went great, if anything it was utterly amazing. We sat in that small café for hours just talking and laughing, it was utterly amazing in that small deserted store. The elderly waitress came back to refill our drinks more than twice smiling at us with tired eyes. I however felt like I had only just woken up and I didn’t ever want to fall asleep again, not now when I had finally been awoken to such happiness.

Liam was sweet too; he was far from pressuring or persistent towards me. He was a true gentleman, being sweet and yet making sure not to force himself and smother me too quickly. No rather he was sweet and tender, gentle brushes and caresses. Plus those smoldering sparkling eyes and that lopsided sweet smile left me breathless and with a tidal of butterflies swarming in the pit of my stomach. I had never experienced anything before and I just wanted to cling tightly to it and never let it go, I wish I could feel like this all the time.

Everything was amazing and I had no thoughts or worries from the outside world, the mere thought of Ez and Eli didn’t even enter my mind and later for that I’d feel guilty. I thought nothing outside our booth until Liam’s phone suddenly and frightening started blaring from within his pockets, scaring the crap out of me.

Liam cursed than frowned as he looked down at his mobile’s screen “What? What is it?” my heart suddenly leaping into my throat.

Liam’s brow furrowed “It’s Eli…”

“So?” I asked confused.

“Well I….” he trailed off laughing slightly embarrassed “I told him not to interrupt or annoy me.” he admitted, his cheeks seeming to rose up.

My stomach lurched “Answer it.” I urged hurriedly.

“Hello?” he answered.

There was no pause; no rather Eli was quick and practically barking down the phone in a tumbled mess of anxiety. My heart lurched further and suddenly I wanted to curl up into a ball and die, I had utterly and completely forgotten of Erin and tonight. True, I had promised myself not to so it didn’t ruin tonight but I still I suddenly felt sick, like I was about to lose insides of my stomachs as they churned and twisted. How had I not thought or worried before? Was the okay? Did Jed or Falan catch her? My head swirled with anxiety and worry, sheer worry that left me breathless and barreled over.

“Wow, just calm down, what happened?” Liam demanded sitting up straighter and pulling away as he jumped into protective brother mode.

“What’s going on?” I hissed anxiously.

There was a tidal of questions fired and demands, plus what seemed like a pure crazed Eli on the other end of the phone. My heart stopped beating for what felt like forever as I waited, my breath knocked out of me as I held it, my lips dry.

What scared me the most was Liam standing up abruptly and storming out the door after throwing a fifty on the table and storming outside of the cute café. Without hesitating I leaped to my feet and took after Liam, fearing the worse. I ignored the people sending us looks and even saying things as I shoved the door hard and carelessly, the bell chime sounding rattled. I stepped out into the cool crisp night to see Liam jumping into his car and shoving his keys in the ignition.

Racing to his door I yanked it open and before he could turn the key I yanked it out, the motor dying before it could even start.

“Hey! Give me that!” Liam shouted in protest, startled.

My eyes narrowed “Not ‘till you tell me what the hell is going on! She is my sister too!”

Gradually I watched as Liam’s eyes softened, the tightness relaxing just the slightest as he continued to grip the steering wheel to death. “Eli called; he had a random phone call off Erin in tears asking for him to pick her up.”

His tight voice had me barreling back questions before he could even pause “Why? Is she alright? What happened?”

Liam shrugged stiffly “He doesn’t know, we don’t know.”

My hands were already fumbling and racing for my phone in my pocket, hands shaking. I stopped though at the sight of Liam slamming his head down hard upon the steering wheel, the horn going off making me jump as it broke the midnight stony silence.

“I’m such an idiot.” He hissed.

I frowned, my heart jumping in anxiety; did he know?

“I’m the worst brother ever.” He muttered, his voice so distraught and guilt ridden that it ripped me apart.

“No you’re not.” I argued.

Liam snorted “I am, I seriously am.”

My heart went out to him and I honestly wanted to tell him all, tell him of Erin’s stupid plan and even how I had stupidly agreed to it. Yet I bit my tongue because not only would I be betraying Erin but I’d be inflicting so much guilt and pain upon not only Liam but also Eli. They’d both be so angry with themselves for being blind and unaware of what had been happening and then after the pain would come anger, so much anger. They’d be angry at Jed, Falan, at me, at our secrets and lies and oh so angry at Erin. That was one tornado I didn’t want to face.

“Liam…” I whispered softly “just tell me what’s going on baby.” I thought nothing of my words but rather the hungered urge within me to relinquish him of all this pain.

Liam sighed tiredly as I leant over him standing in the open side of the driver’s seat as I pried his white fingers free from the steering wheel, his grip deathly tight. One by one I uncurled his fingers from the wheel as Liam let go a deep breath and as he spoke I gently and rather caringly took care of him for once rather than him looking after me.

“Mel I’ve been the worst brother ever.” He murmured struggling already to form sentences as I unhooked a finger “I mean I’ve known there has been something going on with her, you’d have to be stupid not to know. I mean I’ve been so worried but mum and dad told me to let her be, give her space to sort out whatever it is she was dealing with.” He said his voice strained with worry “I know something is going on and I just….I can’t believe I haven’t done anything, I mean I haven’t even been there for her.” He murmured with a strained voice, almost breaking.

Knowing just what I needed to do, what Liam needed I stood up and crawled up onto his lap. Liam was quick to move, his arms reached out and wrapped tightly around me, holding me tightly as if he solely relied on me to keep him here centered on earth. I looped my arms up and around his neck holding him close afraid of even letting him go also, I needed this, I needed him.

Liam buried his face in my neck “I just feel so pathetic.”

My fingers twined in his hair “You’re not pathetic Liam, far from it. Not many people can say they have such an amazing brother as Erin can, not many people can say they have any amazing family member like you. Trust me, I’d know.” I said laughing shortly and humorlessly at the end “Erin’s going through some things and she’ll come around, everybody goes through things you just have to be there when they’re ready to talk.”

Liam shook his head in between the junction of my neck and shoulder, his warm breath tickling my skin as I resisted a shiver. “I feel like I’ve betrayed her, I mean we have always been close and it’s suddenly like I’ve had my leg amputated.”

“That’s just a twin thing.” I tried to soothe gently, trying to lessen the weight as I ran my fingers through his hair absentmindedly “She’s only just now starting to talk to me and open up, it’s just something that is going to take time.”

He pulled back slightly to look me in the eyes “Yeah? Like what? What has she been saying?” he urged anxiously.

I smiled softly, sadly “Telling you would be like breaking girls’ code. I’m not going to break Erin’s trust Liam when she already feels isolated enough as it is, she won’t tell me everything as it is let alone if I go behind her back.” I said honestly, keeping my loyalties in check “Right now I’m not going to do it until I know for sure she is in complete danger.” My stomach churned at that, how did I know she wasn’t already in danger? The question made me feel utterly and completely queasy.

Liam sighed sadly, heavily and yet in that moment I knew he understood and respected my wishes and also Erin’s privacy. It didn’t mean I didn’t already know it was killing him on the inside having to bite his tongue and let her be.

I sighed sadly, seeing the turmoil in the eyes and worry I caved slightly “Would it make you feel any better if I called her now? Just to see how she is?” I murmured softly, running my thumb along his jaw line.

Liam nodded eagerly “Yes, god yes that’d be so good sweetie.” He murmured roughly as he let his forehead fall down upon mine, his hot breath tickling my lips and making them twitch.

I smiled softly as I pulled out my phone dialing the number just as anxious to talk to Erin and at least gauge what had happened. I needed to know so this queasiness fled me. I wasn’t stupid though, I knew I couldn’t speak to Erin so close to Liam when he could hear her words so struggling and wiggling off of his lap I hopped out of the car and leaning against the side of the car still near him but giving us space.

“Hello?”

“Oh thank god you answered! Are you alright?” I gushed quickly, alarmed and relief filling me up to the point I’d spill over. I didn’t realize until this moment how anxious and worried I was.

I heard a groan of exhaustion pass her lips “Yeah, why? What’s wrong?”

“Eli just called Liam, said he had to pick you up.” I told her “Liam’s freaking out right about now. Are you alright? What happened? Was it….was it something Jed did?” I asked lowering my voice, aware of Liam trying to listen in eagerly.

“What are you even doing at this time alone with Liam?” I instantly tensed, blushing when we were only talking over the phone “Oh my god! Did you guys have sex?”

“What? No!” I hissed back, embarrassment coating my cheeks as I avoided Liam’s questioning gaze “We’re on a…..” I trailed off suddenly worried; what would Erin say if she found out about this? She said she was okay with it but how would things work if things go serious? Whose side would she choose when the heartache came if we actually dated? I couldn’t risk my sisterhood even for Liam.

“On a what?” her voice taunting me and making me even more flustered.

“We’re on a date alright? Happy?” I snapped my voice in a hushed whisper as I caught Liam’s gaze which had a smug triumphant smile upon his lips.

“As happy as can be, it’s better than hearing that your twin brother and best friend are right now about to get freaky.” She mused with a smile in her voice “You know dating my brother sucks! How are we supposed to have girl talk to compare anyways?” she cried in mock outrage.

“Compare? What the hell is wrong with you?” I hissed, how was this even relevant to tonight?

“You know, compare the guys we date sizes and how good in bed and shit they are.” She said making me nearly choke on a laugh, since when did Erin ever openly talk about sex and other kinky things without having to torture her for the truth? I was realizing more and more how confident she has truly become in such a short time.

“Firstly Ez you have to have a boyfriend and sex to be able to compare and right now you have neither of those boxes ticked.” I pointed out, biting my tongue from demanding more answers. Especially with Liam right here.

She hummed in agreement “Touché, I’m officially single after tonight.” Happiness lighting her words and surprising me, it was almost in song.

“Why? Did you….get the job done?” I asked, lowering my voice as I pushed off the car and began to act casual as I walked lazily along the side of the car “You weren’t….caught were you?” I asked, holding my breath.

A snort met my ears “God no, those bunch are morons. No, I deleted it and it’s all done and dusted.”

Such a weight was suddenly lifted off my shoulders; everything was able to go back to normal now, no more lies or secrets. No more harm and abuse. I was so relieved and happy I wanted to honestly dance maybe even scream.

“Then why were upset?” that’s when I remembered she was upset, she had been crying. All obviously wasn’t okay or going back to normal, but why? The thought haunted me.

I was met by a taunting silence.

“Erin.” My voice tight, the mum voice as Erin liked to call it.

I was met by a worrying sad sigh “I walked in to find Jed and Madison having sex in one of the bedrooms.”

“He did what?!” I cried gaining Liam’s attention.

“What? What happened?! Is she alright?!” Liam was up demanding like a drill sergent.

“Shhh, I’m trying to find out. Calm down alright or you’ll scare her.” I soothed to him brushing the hair out of his eyes.

Once he had calmed down I turned my attention back to Erin “Alright. Are you okay?” I asked biting my tongue, holding back the tumble of questions battling to break through.

“Yeah, fine. Look, how about we talk later and I’ll tell you the full story? Just don’t tell Liam for me okay?” she pleaded sounding exhausted, obviously not wanting to talk about this right now.

“Yeah of course, we’ll catch up tomorrow morning or something okay? Go out for lunch like old time sakes. Just take care alright, I worry about you.” I said honestly, one of my rare moments when I spoke so truthfully and without any censorship.

“Yes mum.” She grumbled sarcastically “Oh, and mum?” she kept playing along after a pause.

“Yes dear?” I sighed dramatically, playing along like old times.

“Don’t forget to use a condom.”

I chuckled “My daughter’s giving me protection advice, what a scene.”

“Love you.” I was answered with before the line went dead.

***

“So? What was wrong? Is she okay?” Liam finally cracked asking now as he pulled up outside my house, having bitten his tongue the rest of the time.

I sighed softly “I’m not too sure entirely, we’re catching up tomorrow at lunch so I will find out than.” I said, noting how obvious it was that Liam wasn’t too happy about my answer or rather lack of answer. “What I do know though,” I began caving and wanting to appease him any way possible “is that something came up with Jed and it sounds like they are no more.” I said trying to keep to Erin’s promise and yet appease Liam, it painfully sucked having a torn heart.

Liam shook his head as he roughly turned off the ignition “Good.”

I shook my head confused “Good? What do you mean good?”

Liam pulled open his door before racing around to my side of the door and pulling open “Good,” he murmured as I turned to face him, my legs hanging out of the car “as in great that she’s finally done with that douche.” He grunted stepping in between my legs.

“Oh.” I answered lamely.

“I’m sorry.” He murmured stepping even closer into me, his chest brushing mine, his hands sitting on my knees.

My brow furrowed “For what?” I breathed raggedly as his hands slid up higher along my thighs, my body coming to life.

“For breaking our rule of no talking crap.” He murmured leaning forward as his face nuzzled into my sternum my breath shaking even more as his spicy scent tickled my nose.

My fingers on their own accord curled into his hair “You didn’t break that rule, neither of us did.” I soothed softly as I held him closer to me his warmth pressed right up against me, as if molding my flesh to his.

“Mmmm.” He hummed, his nose gliding along my throat causing me to shudder, my toes curling subconsciously in my shoes.

“I don’t want tonight to end.” I whispered breathlessly against him, opening my heart.

“Who said it has to end at nightfall sweetie?”

“The clocks.” I breathed my voice breaking as his teeth took hold of my skin on my neck.

“This can’t end when it’s only just begun.” He murmured roughly, his fingers curling in my hair as he ran his fingers through it tenderly.

“You sound like some corny love song.” I teased breathlessly, the corner of my lip quirking.

“Maybe I am just a corny guy.” He taunted back, his lips suckling on my jugular.

I laughed breathlessly “You’re lucky that some girls like that.”

Liam’s lips drew up higher as I arched my body into his becoming utterly confused how things had so easily become heated, not that I cared. “Oh really?” he asked, his voice light and airy as he nibbled on the point of my chin, his fingers flexing in my hair suggestively.

“Yeah, why? Got a girl in mind?” I breathed teasing him back as I wrapped my arms around his neck drawing him in.

Liam chuckled roughly against my skin making me shudder as he pulled back “Yeah, that would be you.” He sang tapping me on the nose.

I smiled softly up at him, feeling suddenly shy as I realized I couldn’t exactly say yes to him and yet I couldn’t say no. I know what I wanted, I know what I craved. Yet I did also know the outcome, the heart ache and pain that would to follow. The scariest part was that I starting to believe the pain would be entirely worth it in the end, my heart was trumping.

As if reading my thoughts Liam spoke up softly as we sat past midnight in my deserted and sleeping street under the stars and moonlight, his hands cupping my face and tilting my chin up so he could look me in the eye “I know,” he murmured softly “I know this doesn’t mean we’re dating or anything but I know tonight, it meant something.” he murmured passionately “I don’t know about you but tonight this was….just what I wanted, what I’ve always wanted.”

I shook my head smiling “It means something to me; it’s meant so much to me.”

Liam’s lips quirked softly “Is this where I walk you up to your door?” he murmured softly.

I smiled looping my arms up around his neck “Well that’s usually the moves of a cheesy gentleman.”

Liam chuckled softly pulling back as he held out his arm “Well then, after you.”

Walking up the front path to my front door the butterflies were back swarming low in the pit of my stomach at the prospect of what was to come. This is the part on any date when you lean in and give them a kiss goodnight, was Liam expecting that? The whole prospect of tonight was utterly confusing, I mean I had said yes when I was resisting so why did I still go? Did Liam expect more dates in the future? Should I just jump his bone like I desperately wanted to? I shook my head, I wasn’t going to dwell on it tonight, we had made a deal. So who cares if I kissed him tonight? If I did I’d leave it for me to dwell and ponder over ‘till I yanked my hair out.

The idea alone had a bounce in my step as we walked up the garden path ‘till we were stopping at my front door and I had the key in the lock and turned, the door falling opened. A giant smile was upon my face as I lopped my arms up around his neck and he instantly beamed his hands going to my face and tilting it back all so tenderly as his large calloused hands rubbed against my skin.

“I had fun.” He murmured softly.

My lips tipped “I guess I will be seeing you tomorrow?” I murmured softly as I leant towards him, watching as my breath caused his hair to dance.

Liam smiled “Definitely, maybe drop around before your lunch date with Ez yeah?” his playful question giving me a shivery thrill.

I smiled teasingly “If you play your moves right.”

Liam’s eyes blazed in amusement “Hmm, true. Well what would the cheesy gentleman’s next move be?” he murmured roughly, his voice deep and sexy.

I smiled as I tugged him closer his spicy scent tickling the bottom of my nose as I leant in “Well it usually would start here.” I breathed.

Than I was kissing him.

Our lips met in a tender whispered brush, as his lips stroked against mine and I could feel, oh I could feel it spiral and right down to my toes which where curling in my shoes. It was the softest brush let alone kiss with utterly no open mouth but I could still taste him and in that moment I realized anything from now on was going to taste like utter death. It was the most wonderful feeling in the entire world, feeling his warm and yet somewhat rough hands against my flesh, molded to my face. His soft and yet firm lips against my lips, plus the feel of his hair falling in between my fingers and of course his warm body flushed against mine. For the first time in so long I knew I was alive, the rush of electricity and the currents wrapping around me just as much as Liam was wrapped around me, was proof enough.

Sadly though as soon as the kiss had started it was over, a sweet tender kiss that I was going to cherish forever and yet crave more of.

Liam pulled back with the goofiest grin upon his face, curling a curl of my hair behind my ear as he gave my lips one final brush. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that for.” He murmured softly to me, holding my gaze as they bore passionately into my own.

I smiled softly unable to say words as my world still spun and my body still throbbed. I felt dizzy and dazed as he leant in one last time kissing the crown of my head and whispering goodnight before he took two steps at a time down the garden path, leaving me breathless and dazed by my front door under the moonlight as I watched him leave. My lips throbbed as I watched him go, but it didn’t take long for them to turn into a breathless smile as he spun around on the last bottom step and said one last thing to me ending on a playful wink.

“I’ll see you tomorrow night, I’ll bring the pizza.”

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Sorry it's taken so long -I have my reasons, like: a death in the family, brokenlaptop and net, uni, floodings. But even after all that I still can't find it within me to write right now and like it, I personally think this chapter is pure shitty - so please tell me; yay or nay?
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