y/n malfoy pov (6th year)

I hated to say this. But I, of all people, liked women. I was a Malfoy for Merlin's sake. I was supposed to like men and only men.

I was predestined to marry Blaise Zabini.

And yet, I was in love with the Slytherin baddie, Pansy Parkinson.

Pansy was everything I wanted to be.

Confident, badass, and hella attractive.

But I, Y/N Malfoy, was anything but attractive. I had short choppy blonde hair that was too short to cover my ears, gray eyes that made me look dead, and pale white skin that made paper jealous.

I was walking in the hall. Professor Binns let me leave class early.

I felt sick to my stomach. Blaise was openly flirting with me and I wanted to puke.

No offense but that man was crusty as hell. His breath smelled so bad.

And Draco didn't even stop the flirting. He just ignored me.

I was literally so upset. My brother was my only friend considering my parents didn't allow me any.

I went into the girls lavatory and splashed my face with water, letting tears splash into the sink. I gagged as I cried, trying not to puke.

Why did I have to feel like this? I never wanted to feel like this.

"Y/n? Y/n Malfoy, right?" I heard a soft voice behind me ask.

I shuddered and wiped my face, turning around to the person.

Her eyes met mine with worry and concerned.

Pansy Parkinson.

"Are you okay?" Pansy asked, walking over to me.

"I'm fine," I say. I wipe my hands on my robe and turn to leave the loo.

Pansy gently grabbed my hand. "You can always talk to me if you'd like," She smiled softly at me.

Since when was the Slytherin baddie so nice?

"Yeah, I'd like that, thanks," I say returning the smile.

"We have a study period next so we could talk in the library, if you'd like of course," She says.

She lets go of my hand but motions for me to follow her.

We walk silently side by side to the library at the other end of the school.

"Why are you not in class?" I asked, curiously.

"Binns class was kinda boring. He never pays attention to me and I sit in the back so I slipped out," She said casually. " I usually leave about five minutes into class. I pay Zabini to give me notes."

My body freezes at the name.

Blaise Zabini.
My brothers best friend.
The man I must marry.
The man who flirted with me ten minutes ago in class.
The man who I hate with a burning passion.

"Are you okay y/n?" Pansy asks me.

I realize that I have stopped in the middle of the hallway.

I shake it off with a smile and keep walking with Pansy. We make it to the library and we find a table in the back by the restricted section.

"Why're you being so nice to me?" I can't help but ask.

"I'm not really all confidence and bitch face. I have a soft personality. I just have to put on an act for my parents," She explains.

"Heh, tell me about it," I said sighing.

"You seem like me. Hiding behind a mask," Pansy says.

I sit there and begin contemplating.

I could either tell her about Blaise and how I feel about her or lie to her yet again and make myself feel worse.

I look her in the eyes and talk.

"it's a long story so sit back and get comfy," I sigh. "I am betrothed to Blaise Zabini. But the thing is, I'm only 16, right? And I don't necessarily like him or any he's or him's. I don't have friends because of my parents and I don't feel okay. I'm always hiding behind my brother and am overlooked. Most boys want me for my body. I hate it really. And the worst part is, I hate men so much. Women on the other hand are beautiful," I ramble, nervously. "And I was crying before because Blaise was flirting with me and I felt so sick and nauseous and upset about having to marry a man when I just want to marry you."

My eyes widen. Did that last part really just slip out?

Pansy just stared at me.

Her eyelashes were curled to perfection.
Her eye shape was beautiful.
Her lips were a dark pink again so her light skin.
Her dark brown hair framed her face and made her skin glow.

She was perfect. A Slytherin baddie.

I was a mess. A Slytherin tragedy.

I gave up on an answer and stood up, pushing the wooden chair under the study desk.

Pansy looked peaceful. She didn't need me to disturb that. I was better off with no friends and marriage that dipshit Zabini.

"Yeah, I feel that way too sometimes." A small whisper escaped Pansy's lips.

"You- you what?" I asked, sitting back down. Our knees were touching and I wanted so badly for her to be mine.

"I've always felt like you have. Used for my body. Wanted by men but wanting women." She said smiling at me.

"You're like me?" I asked astonished

"Yes," She smiles sweetly.

Merlin, why are women so hot? I don't understand how they can be this beautiful.

"Oh," I say. I really didn't know what to say. "Wait, so you didn't hook up with my brother last year?" I ask.

"No, it was just a rumour he started so people believed I was 'sleeping around'. I haven't even kissed anyone so that was a really stupid lie," She sighs.

Kiss me, I thought.

"You want me to kiss you?" She asks.

"Wait did I say that out loud?" I questioned.

"Yeah," She giggled.

"I mean, if you want," I say, gaining confidence. My inner baddie was showing.

lmao guys I'm so swag now. getting a hot girl to kiss me.

Pansy leaned in and nerves over took me. I didn't think she'd actually agree but I guess that changed a few seconds later when our lips met in a quick kiss.