(Tw for this chapter; self harm)

Max was sitting on her bed, hugging the one hoodie Mike had given her very tightly, missing his warmth. Her being left completely alone wasn't a good thing and she was letting her emotions and thoughts take too much control of her. She was upset with everything relating to Mike, but mostly just how she couldn't rely on him anymore like she had done a few times. She wished it didn't hurt her so much but it did. She had relied on that. His home had became her safe haven for those two nights and she had hoped it would have remained that way but it didn't. She wanted it back, needed it. She felt so safe and she wished she could feel safe again like that. She knew she could continue to go to his house for comfort if she needed to since he offered but she couldn't because to her it would just feel wrong, especially with El back in Hawkins.

In regards to how she felt about Mike she had no idea. He had saved her more than he would ever know and because of that she loved him for those nights. But since it didn't continue she didn't love him anymore. Or at least that's what she told herself. Because it hurt her to admit she still loved him even though he was back with El now. It wasn't like he ever wasn't with her anyways, El had just come back so they were spending more time together again. And Max had to remind herself constantly that they were together and that she had no chance with Mike and that them becoming even just friends was questionable.

Suddenly emotions overtook her and she started crying, unable to help the tears streaming down her face. After a few minutes she started choking on her tears and drowned the hoodie with her tears that she couldn't seem to stop no matter how hard she tried.
She set the hoodie down and got up, making her way to the bathroom. She needed an outlet. Something to distract her heart from missing those nights, from missing that safety, from missing him.

The good Mike, the loving Mike that had shone through those few times. But now El was the only one who would see that side of him, all of the time. Max felt she needed that more than El, as selfish as that thought was. But she reminded herself that El had been through a lot also, but even that couldn't rid the redheaded girl of jealousy coursing through her veins.

She opened a drawer to reveal a pair of scissors. A flicker of the idea of hurting herself crossed her mind but she didn't want to turn to that. She knew if she started that she wouldn't be able to stop. But she couldn't resist the urge that overcame her like a wave. She grabbed the pair of scissors and dug the sharp end into her skin and dragged it down her arm. She screamed in pain and dropped the scissors, unable to cut herself anymore. Blood dripped from her arm and onto the tile floor as she collapsed onto the floor and leaned against the cabinets. She sobbed even louder as she gripped her arm, it now stinging like hell. At least it took her mind off Mike.

Even if it was only for a second.

***

Mike was still laying on his bed staring up at the ceiling, unable to sleep for some reason unknown to him though he was sure it was just that he had too much on his mind. Suddenly he gained an odd feeling that something was wrong with Max. He didn't know why or if that feeling was even accurate but he felt the need to check up on her, especially knowing the bad things she could possibly be doing to herself. He quickly escaped through his window and got on his bike, pedaling to her house as quickly as he possibly could. Once he got there he got off his bike and laid it aside as he rushed up to the front door.

***

Suddenly there was a knock at the door and she became panicked. Who on earth would be knocking at the door at this time? She quickly grabbed a towel and wrapped it around her bleeding arm as she made her way to the door. She opened it a crack with her wrapped arm so whoever it was wouldn't be able to see it. To her surprise and disappointmentment it was Mike. "Mike? What are you doing here?" She asked in confusion.

Mike looked her over in worry as he said, "I just felt like something really bad happened and I wanted to check on you. Are you okay?" He then scanned the inside of the house as much as he could, checking for any signs of abuse from her step father. "He's not here," she let him know, not answering his question. "Okay good. But are you alright?" He asked again, the worry not fading from his face as he directed his gaze down to her.

It tore her apart knowing how he still did care for her a whole lot, though she figured it was only out of pity. "I'm fine," she lied as convincingly as she could. Mike stared at her for a moment before he realized something was wrong. "You look like you've been crying. Max, what's going on?" He said, trying to make his way inside the house, her pushing on the door to try and prevent him from doing so.

They went back and forth pushing the door until he tried to push the door open for a third time and it caused the towel to slip off her arm. "Shit," she muttered as she went to pick it up which allowed him to get inside. He noticed her blood covered arm and his eyes widened. "Max, what happened?!" He asked worriedly. Max quickly covered her arm back up and shook her head, "It's nothing Mike. Please leave." She gave him a pleading look but it didn't work.

He approached her and unwrapped her arm to look at the damage. "Did you do this to yourself?" He asked as he looked at her. Max didn't answer as she bit her lip and tried to prevent herself from crying again. Mike quickly brought her into a hug and asked, "what's wrong, Max? Why did you do that to yourself? Why?!" She could tell he was upset at her for doing it.

She broke again as she started crying some more and hugged him back very tightly, finally having a chance to feel his warmth again. But she knew it would be ripped away from her in a minute so she tried to cherish and get as much of it as she could. He rubbed her back and ran his fingers through her hair as he again asked, "Max, what's going on? Please tell me." "I-I can't," she said back through her sobs, stuttering a little. "Why not?" He asked back in confusion as he finally pulled away and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Because it's too complicated to explain. And stupid," she said back as she sighed. "No please tell me. I want to know what's going on that caused you to get to the point of hurting yourself," he begged. She could tell she was just worrying him more. "No. I don't want to make you feel bad," she argued as she met his eyes. "What? Why would it make me feel bad?" He asked, still confused.

"Because it has to do with you! I hurt myself because I missed you! Because I think I'm falling in love with you but you love El!" She exclaimed, unable to keep it to herself anymore as she pulled her gaze away from him. Once she realized what she said she gasped then fled through the door into the darkness of the night. Mike was in shock but chased after her anyways. He ran out after her, calling her name, "Max, wait!"

She ran and ran until her legs gave out and she fell onto the ground near the forest, starting to sob some more. Mike showed up by her side a moment later and sat down next to her. "Max, please let me take you back home," he said to her gently as he placed a hand on the side of her face and made her look up at him. She pulled away from his touch even though she wanted to feel it. She shook her head, "I don't want to go home."

Mike nodded, "okay, you don't have to. I can take you to my home." "I don't want to go to your stupid home either. I don't want to go there and have you comfort me for one night and then it be all over again. I hate to admit it but I need comfort every fucking night and you hurt me when you only gave that to me twice before El came back," she said back harshly, breathing heavily and shakily.

She wasn't fully sure of what she was saying since that wasn't exactly the truth. He had offered for her to stay again but only after a little bit. She was just mad and taking it out on him.
Mike stared at her and felt a huge weight suddenly attach itself to his heart. "Max... I'm so sorry," he started, truly feeling bad. She stood up and let her anger explode again, "No! I don't want to hear your stupid ass apology. You love El. I get it. You don't want her to think you're cheating on her with me. It's fine. I'll just try to find some other comfort. I was stupid to rely on you being my safe haven. Even for just two fucking nights. I was stupid to fall in love with you. I was stupid to have even opened up to you."

She went to walk off again but he stood up too and caught her hand, pulling her back. She struggled against his grip until he pulled her into a hug which she melted into even though she didn't want to at all. "No, Max. If you want me to be your comfort I will be. I won't abandon you again, I swear," he said softly to her. She knew when Mike Wheeler swore something he meant it.

"But it hurts me to rely on you. Because I'm falling in love with you and you aren't. I appreciate that you want to be my comfort but it just-" she tried to explain but she was cut off by his lips pressing against hers for a gentle, soft, and loving kiss. She hesitated for a moment then kissed him back, hating it and loving it at the same time. It felt so right to her but she of course figured that it didn't feel that way to him. But she was wrong, so terribly wrong.

Once he pulled away he said as he put his head against hers, "I understand. But you don't need to worry about that. Because I am falling in love with you too." She looked into his eyes, looking surprised. She felt like he was lying but it really seemed like he meant it and she wanted to believe it.

Once she decided to believe him she smiled slightly and he smiled back. He then grabbed one of her hands and took her back to his house. They snuck in as usual and he brought her upstairs to the bathroom to clean up her arm. She sat on the edge of the tub as he sat on the toilet seat. He was using cotton balls and alcohol to wipe off the dried blood. She cringed whenever he touched one of the cotton balls to her skin and he squeezed her hand comfortingly everytime he did.

Once he was done he said, "there, that looks a little better." She nodded as she looked it at and frowned. "Please don't do that again Max," he then said to her as he gave her a serious look. She nodded and said back, "I won't." He nodded then stood up to put the supplies away.

As he shut the cabinet door he felt Max come up behind him and wrap her arms around him. He looked up into the mirror to see her rest her chin on his left shoulder. He rested his hands on top of hers and smiled. "You'll be okay now, I'll make sure of it," he assured her softly. "Okay," she said back as she shut her eyes, relaxing.

After a brief moment she then asked, "What about El?" He let out a small sigh at the mention of El. He had basically cheated on her because he had chickened out earlier that day with breaking up with her. If he had just broken up with her this wouldn't be such a problem. "I'll just tell her the truth," he said unsurely since he still wasn't exactly sure of what he would do or tell her.

"I can do it instead if you want me to," she then offered, knowing he probably wouldn't want to tell El. "No. It's my fault. I fell in love with you and kissed you while I was with her. I should be the one to tell her what happened," he argued back. "Alright," she replied without further argument.

"And what about Lucas?" He then asked her after a moment of silence had passed over them. "Just like you, I'll tell him the truth," she answered simply. Mike nodded then Max pulled away from him and he left the bathroom and headed into his bedroom, her following after him.

"Welcome back to your safe haven," he said lightheartedly as he gestured to his room as if he was displaying it. Max laughed a little as she then teased, "it's gotten messier." "Yeah sorry. I'll work on that," he said back as he chuckled nervously. She nodded as she then climbed into his bed and buried herself under the covers. Mike climbed in after her and wrapped his arms around her.

"For now on this will be an every night occurrence," he said to her gently. "Good," she replied as she laughed a little again. He leaned forward slightly and gave her a quick peck on the cheek before saying, "Goodnight Max." She giggled a little as she said back, genuinely sounding happy, "Goodnight Mike."

***

So here's this chapter! Their first kiss!!! I already had this chapter written for a long time and had just needed to edit it a little bit. This is the longest chapter and I'm actually pretty proud of this one as cheesy/cliche it may be. I hope you liked this chapter!!