From gate C3, Jungkook watches more strangers hustle by. Some with their families, some with friends, and some with their lone suitcases. The man sitting in front of him rubbed his tired eyes before leaving again for the third time - probably to the restroom. The hours had gone by and the terminal is constantly filled and emptied, but his flight is yet to be announced. 

The voice on the loudspeaker has already mentioned that it will be delayed...for what, he's unsure, but it's getting on his nerves. It is his first time to enter this side of the airport...his first time to be going on an airplane and flying, and it is also his first time leaving the country so yes, there's a lot to be worried of. 

The incessant 'dings' on his phone has quiet down. He received a lot of those when he first got here - from his parents to his friends - everyone has a lot of reminders for him. But they've probably gone bored of 'entertaining' him that much, so the past 2 hours have been mostly silent (and he welcomes it!).

Not that it's any nuisance - no, Jungkook just needs time on his own to revel at the fact that he's finally here...leaving home. A few things come into mind that he'd like to leave behind, but he knows that even in this impermanent no-man's land, he'll always stuck carrying all his life around. Every memories, good or bad...are still mine.

Still, he can't help but smile. Within the past 5 years, Jungkook has graduated with a Diploma and a Degree (one of the few with flying colours). He can't say if he's any smarter than before (although he could), but he is definitely wiser (or at least, he likes to think that he is!). He's gotten to know his 'home' and more of its 'people'...so much so that he could the crowds in his farewell could probably fit 2 entire travel bus alone. 

But more than that, Jungkook felt like he has lived enough lives between the borders. He's been (in his own opinion) a wanderer...an adventurer...and he has been in 5 other brawls in Heulg (blame Jackson for getting him involved!). He was arrested for swimming in Gyeonggu River 6 more times, and on the last, he finally gets to see how it feels like being locked up in Seojjog Police Headquarters (because it seemed that a fine wasn't enough to stop him from doing it again). 

Jungkook has made quite a few bad choices that he can be proud of, although he can't say that he did or did not 'break some hearts'. He hadn't went out or dated anyone so he couldn't possibly break anyone's heart. But he has, countless times, ignored the 'love letters' and flirty smiles so chances are, he did. 

From time to time, he does wonder if Lalisa would be proud of the 'him' now. There's no way that he will know since nobody's ever heard from the girl all this while, but he could see that if she has somehow sensed how he's doing, she'll say something along the lines of, 'Baby, I'm so proud of you!'. Yes, 'baby' is required. 

Far ahead, he spots a couple in an embrace - looking so perfectly happy to be in each other's arms and company. His heart throbs at the sight - teasing the gentleness out of him and testing if he will (again) cry. 

On instinct, he takes out his wallet to see Lalisa's face. The printed-out paper has aged by the years as well, and while there are a lot of frustrations he's kept inside, with all her chaos, she is still the prettiest girl he has ever seen. The prettiest dream...and the prettiest muse. But,

Noona was wrong - she didn't keep to her promise. If she had, she would've been here with me. I don't get to bring her there with me... 

Perhaps it's the longing of every imagination he's ever had for his lost love...or perhaps this is something he may never be able to change...a sensitive soul that is easily touched, so yes, he still cries a lot when he thinks of Lalisa. He wipes his eyes before the 'pipes' bursts on its own and places the wallet back into his pocket.

Jungkook has learned quite well from his experiences that there isn't much that scares him anymore...other than his own heart. He'll confess the irrational fear he has deep in there...especially of 'hope'. Because 'hope' feels like a hand that is shaken with trust, but promises no path firmed enough beneath his feet.

Either way, he is still this familiar and unfamiliar being altogether...on his way to stepping into the rest of the world. Jungkook darts his eyes out onto the tarmac and the dark sky. Nights happen everyday, but the shining stars always seem a little different. It's much more beautiful tonight...so he thinks they're celebrating his departure too.

. . .

On his second night away from home, Jungkook managed to find a comfortable-enough bed to stretch on (the first was spent at the Parso Airport during a layover). The small Bed and Breakfast is nearby the bus station and although it smells like some questionable earthy, musky smoke at the reception earlier, he welcomes any mattress to soothe the long-hours back pain he's been suffering with.

"Hey! I'm Chad...this is Mike," A tall guy with side-shaven haircut grins, introducing himself before another guy who's wearing a shirt that is too tight for his body (in his opinion). "Guess you're our new bunkmate!"

Jungkook smiled even though it felt weak. "Hi...Jungkook. I'm just here for a night. I won't be a bother -"

"Oh, don't worry bout it! Your first time in Pena?"

"Yeah...I'll be heading to Belthria tomorrow,"

"Ooo Belthria!" Mike squeezes his two palms together and Jungkook can't help but feel amused at how cutely feminine he looked. "We loved it - the hedges, right??" He nods. "But it's very cold this time, did you bring any jackets? Coats?" The guy scanned the rucksack behind him - probably wondering if it contains the thick attire.

Oh...I read that but - "It's not snowing, is it?"

"The northern's cold could feel like it is, really. We were there last week and it was what - minus 10 degrees?" Mike turns to Chad, who then nods. 

Shit. I thought it's the same as Gorea's winter! "I'll drop by a store tomorrow then!" He nervously laughs. 

"Mm-hmm - oh, you should get it at Belcro Mart before you leave! They have everything there and it's super-cheap! It's just 2 blocks down," Chad said.

Jungkook might be considered a little shy and reserved by the way he only managed to grin, but it really can't be helped. His body feels too tired to even start leaving long-lasting impression on anyone. But I should probably get used to this...there's a lot more places to go and I'm bound to meet more people along the way!

"We'll leave you to it then!" Chad continues towards the door. "If you feel like loosening some limbs, you're welcomed to join us," He shows off a faded-looking cigarette. 

"Oh, I don't smoke, but thank you!" This, he managed to laughed.

"It's not smoking if it's weed, honey," Mike answered, eyeing him almost slyly. 

"Weed?" He blinked not only because of the strange-sounding cigarette, but also because a guy just called him 'honey'.

"Bless my dick - you don't know what weed is??" Mike gasped loudly. Bless...his...what? "Marijuana -"

"Oh yeah -" He laughs almost goofily. "Marijuana...as in for medicines -"

"Chad...get him to try it -"

"No, no...I'm alright. I just feel tired - I'm not sick or anything -"

"Come on, Jumpook...it's your first time in Pena! I bet it's your first time out too - try it for the sake of the travel log!" Chad came to his side and pulls the strap of his rucksack off from his weary shoulders. 

Travel...log? He wonders about it more than the wrong call of his name, honestly. 

. . .

Not even half an hour later, Jungkook is already giggling off his depressing love story to a point that 'happy' tears started coming out from the corners of his eyes. His shoulders no longer feel tired of the burden and his heart is beating in such a peaceful pace that he forgot if he has ever felt this much freedom in his life before. Oh, but his speech...

"And then...and then...I never heard...from her again. Up until now..." 

...is painfully draggy. 

He giggles again for God knows why, although he's quite aware that the sound he made appears much slower - as if it's suspended somewhere in time. In front of him, Mike is sitting on Chad's lap - leaning his head on the guy's shoulder while sheepishly smiling at him. 

"You must miss her a lot, huh?" Chad asked.

"Miss her...no, man," He didn't know why he kept using the word 'man'. Perhaps it's to remind himself of who they are...subtly. "That's too small...of a word...to describe it, man. I...I think of her...every day. Somewhere...sometimes out of...out of nothing...I think of her. Her face...her smile...her eyes...definitely her eyes..."

"You deserve so much better, Jumpook," Mike said.

"No...yes..." He's not sure why the smoke looks like a slow-moving puff of clouds and for a second there, he wonders if that's how slow the sloth that Lalisa spoke about moved. For that alone, he giggles again. "I deserve...I deserve to love...who I love, man,"

Mike leans forward as if to whisper, but his voice sounds crystal clear. "You just haven't been out there yet! There are thousands of women looking for love in the world, Jumpook. We have friends too! Probably prettier than Lilisa -" 

"Lalisa..." It's completely fine that they keep saying his name wrong, but not hers. "It's funny...she's funny. But she's right...she said it, she said I'll beg to...forget about her...and I've been begging. I begged every day..."

"Hush, baby...he can't help who he loves," Chad muttered with eyes filled with pity. "It's alright Jumpook...the time will come when you'll know what to do. Believe us, we know...cus we can't help who we love either,"

When Mike turns back to kiss Chad on the lips, Jungkook knew he should stop saying 'man'.

. . .

The ethereal beauty and its high magnificence is jaw-dropping and awe-inspiring, but the contrasting change of weather has gotten him a little sick. While his days visiting the dark, giant hedges in Northern Belthria was cold and windy, the sun isn't shy at all to shine and blaze the lands of Estiros and its historic pyramids. 

"Salaam aleikum!" 

Jungkook coughed again as he blocks his face away from the gushing wind of fine sands. In front of him, his tour guide, Yasir, greeted another friend.  He is sure that the guy is going to introduce the friend as another 'brother', because the last 8 were too. 

"Mr Guk, this is my brother, Mahmoud," See? 

He simply plastered the friendly smile as Mahmoud shakes his hand. Then, as expected, the guy proceeds to pull him close and (seemingly) kisses both of his cheeks...before patting him on the shoulder. Thankful to be Jungkook, he has read about this common greetings in the National Library. He's never been patted so much in a day before in his life until now, much less being kissed by men!

"You go here - first day?" Mahmoud asked, along with hand gestures. 

Jungkook knew that their tongue speaks a different language too, and for that, he came (a little) prepared. "Albarihat sabahan. Huna...naeam," His grin widened when Mahmoud looks back to Yasir, seemingly impressed with his ability (or effort) to showcase his knowledge. 

"Hunak alkathir litrahu - inshallah!" What? What's that - I only know that last part - "Sayakhuduk akhi iilaa aleadid min al amakin -"

Oh no...okay, wait - shit! Where is that damn dictionary - He scrambled for his pockets to find the handy book while Mahmoud is still speaking eloquently (and excitedly). 

"Wait, I don't - can you repeat that, please?" He butted in after finally manages to get the dictionary out.

Yasir laughs. "He said there's a lot of wonderful places to see and I will bring you, Mr Guk. And he said to drop by his house for some tea this evening,"

"Oh..." His awkward smile is for the disappointment of himself, really. "Sure! I mean...we'll be done by evening, right? I don't want to make promises I can't keep,"

"Relax, Mr Guk. Our evenings are very flexible here...you have all the time in the world,"

Heh...I've heard that before! "Sure..." He nods to Mahmoud before the man walks away, then continues to follow behind Yasir. "Yasir, I told you...just Guk is fine,"

"Just Guk, Mr Guk - no difference!" Yasir laughs. "It's my form of respect for you -"

"But you asked me to call you just Yasir...it should go both ways, right?"

"You calling me Yasir is a form of respect to me, Mr Guk. It makes us feel like we're your brothers when you call us by our names,"

Oh... "Then you should call me Guk too. That way, I can be your brother too!"

Yasir stopped walking and for a second there, Jungkook thought that he might get beaten and mummified in this great pyramid for crossing the cultural line. 

"You are a strange man..." A smile curved up on Yasir's mouth. "Okay, Guk, my brother! Let's go!"

With an equally enthusiastic grin, Jungkook nods and continues walking. The deeper they go, the more he feels like he's traveling back in time. In the darkness of each small passageways, he could see the sun shining through the cracks - lighting none other than the grey and brown hues of this place.

On the walls of the tombs within each tunnels, he found mystifying carved drawings - telling stories that he haven't fully understand, despite Yasir's attempt on guiding him through. He can only tell the importance of a ranked individual by the show of their wigs and apparels. 

"This is the famous Meryre and Kheti," Yasir stopped by one tomb. "She was a priestess and her husband was a server in the pharaoh's palace,"

Jungkook nods, staring at the painting of a wig-wearing man and a normal-looking woman with shoulder-length hair. The man is dressed in an off-shoulder, robe-like outfit, a layered collar-like necklace, and a bracelet - looking very well-established among the many paintings of men in this small tunnel. 

"Sorry...the man's a server?" He can't help but asks because it seems like Kheti held more power. 

"Yes. That's why this drawing is famous, you see. Because between the two, it was Meryre who seemed to have the status in the society...but look at the way her hand is placed on her husband's chest. It shows the affection she has for her husband. Look at the dress...she lets him look more elegant than her. This is a special closeness, they said...because not many tombs have this kind of admiration between a man and a woman,"

I see... "Are these all their descendants?" He points to the rest of the people on the walls around him.

"Maybe...they're not sure," Yasir said before leaving towards another tunnel. "Do you have a wife, Guk?"

"No," He laughs.

"No? A handsome man like you - no??" 

Yes...it's hard to believe, isn't it? He brushed the back of his neck shyly. 

"Ahh...a love prospect, maybe?" Jungkook's little embarrassed smile probably gave it away. "There is, right? Is she at home, waiting for you?"

The image of Lalisa, waiting for him (anywhere, really) makes him blush. "No, no...she's...far. I don't know how far actually...but far,"

Yasir stopped again and faces him, looking serious all of a sudden. "There is saying in our religion...I'll share it with you, my brother. 'What is meant for you, will reach you even if it is beneath two mountains. What isn't meant for you, won't reach you even if it is between your two lips.'...do you know what it means?"

Jungkook shakes his head even though his brain is already trying to digest it.

"It means that, if something is meant for you, no matter what, it will always come to you. And if it's not meant for you, no matter how hard you try to reach for it, you pin it down, but it will never become yours. You understand now?"

Of course...he nods.

"Do not worry, my brother. God is the perfect planner. He is most merciful and loving, and He will always guide us to His plans and He will do it without us even asking. If we find something so incredible, we can only hope that it is ours to keep. If we lose it, we say 'alhamdulillah, thank you for taking what's not meant to be mine away', and we let it go,"

Okay...wow...is Yasir a messenger to give me a sign that I should let my love go then??

"Think about it...life is very short, my brother. We don't always realize it," The guy pats on his back.

Wait - "I thought you said I have all the time in the world?" He joked because this is getting a little too sentimental for a walk over tombs! Thankfully, Yasir understood his sentiment.

"For tea, yes, we have time! Come!"

. . . 

There it is...the great, big fire. Jungkook can't help but hold his tired, heavy breaths - even if he's been sitting at the edge of the ruin's cliff for almost fifteen minutes. Across the burnt orange horizon, the sun sets itself halfway - washing the land before him in hues of gentle, golden glow...like the color of her hair...

He didn't realize when his eyes started pooling with grief and amazement - all mixed into one. Perhaps it's when he heard the soft whispers in his mind, telling him that it's time to let her go. Or maybe it's always been there since he accepted the kind advice by Yasir...from 6,000 miles away, just waiting for the right time to be let out. 

"What is meant for you, will reach you even if it is beneath two mountains. What isn't meant for you, won't reach you even if it is between your two lips."

Here at the edge of the Pincha's ruins...at 25, just like I promised you, Lalisa-ssi. I'm here...and I'm too exhausted now...and I'm sorry that I'm this weak. Out of all my dreams, you're the only one that I can't reach. So I'm sorry...I'm sorry...this is where I have to let you go. 

. . .