He breathed shallowly, his head cradled in the crook of my arm. My hand supported his back, my other hand on his chest, feeling his breaths. He stared up at my face, our eyes never parting. Sawai-san was on her cellphone with Yokohara-sensei, hurriedly talking. He was so pale, no makeup today. He was too sick. Such dark circles under his eyes, like he hadn't slept for a thousand days.

"Are you sure?" Sawai-san asked, glancing at us, and then straight ahead again. "We shouldn't take him to the hospital here? Okay... I get it. But, if you could see how he looks... I know it's only an hour away. I understand. What kinds of tests do you want to run? Uh huh... Yeah. We can try that. Okay, we're on the way. Good bye."

He began throwing up this morning. He woke up, and put his head over the side of the bed, heaving. I patted his back and held his hair. He hadn't stopped for a couple of hours, his skin going clammy.

My mom was already gone by the time Sawai-san arrived at the house. She knocked on our door to check on us, because it was getting late in the morning. I opened the door, asking where my mom was. She said she didn't know.

We tried to get Sana to eat something, but he threw it up. We tried to get him to drink a Pedialyte, but he threw it up. Then he threw up the water we tried to get him to drink. He couldn't keep anything down. He was getting progressively weaker, his skin changing color. That's when Sawai-san decided to call Yokohara-sensei for her opinion, as we'd done yesterday, too.

She laid her phone on her knee. I gave her my full attention.

"She said for us to take Sana to Tokyo right away. She wants to put him in observation, run some tests, get him rehydrated. She has some suspicions, so she thinks it's a better idea to get him to Tokyo where she can try to properly diagnose him quicker."

I nodded fast, my lips parted, trying to take it all in. "What else did she say? What suspicions does she have?"

"She didn't say, but she was insistent that we come right away."

"Okay. Let's go. We can-" I started shifting on the couch, thinking of how I was going to maneuver us up.

"Your mom has the car."

I froze. I couldn't believe it. "Let's call her. She can come back, and we'll get the car, you can drive." I looked down at Sana. He was still staring up at me, not moving. What was going through his head? I wanted him to talk to me. Tell me how he was feeling. Anything. Strangely, I wasn't panicking. What was this feeling?

"Um, I don't have a license. There was never a need for me to have one..."

"Oh."

We paused together. She looked up at the ceiling and put her finger up. "A taxi. We can take a taxi there. Let me look up the price."

I nodded rapidly. "If I can't get my mom, we'll take one. I can drive. I have my license. Or she can drive. I don't know... I don't- I don't know." I was getting confused. Sana took a long blink when I looked at him again, and this long blink meant he was getting ready to fall asleep. My breathing increased, watching him. Oh. There is was. Panic.

My hand went to my chest, trying to steady myself. He blinked again, keeping his eyes closed for several seconds.

I hadn't been panicking, because he was still awake. He always said I could still help him if he was awake. But, if he was unconscious, it was an emergency.

"No, no, Sana, don't go to sleep," I tried to say gently, successful. "You can't go to sleep, okay? Stay awake."

He made a small noise in his throat, making those audible, shallow breaths. No, no, we needed to get him some help.

I jumped as my phone vibrated in my hoodie's pocket. Was it his device's app telling me something even worse? I made an involuntary scared noise. But, a familiar ring tone played instead.

Natsuko.

I fumbled my phone out, and discovered my hands were shaking. I stared at Sana's face, studying it for signs of falling asleep, as I answered, putting her on speaker to make it easier to talk to her like this. "Hello?" Sudden realization hit me like a smack to the face. "Natsuko!" I yelled.

"Ahh! Why are you yelling at me?!" She gasped, starting to laugh.

"Natsuko, I need your car! We need to go to Tokyo! Sana needs to see Yokohara-sensei! We need to go to the hospital!"

"Oh- shit, okay. I'm in the neighborhood. I've got Shinji and Aki with me in the car right now, though. What should we do?"

In the background, Shinji made an appalled noise. "Auntie said a bad word!" He shouted.

"What? Why are they with you? Shouldn't they be in school? This doesn't make any sense. Please get here as soon as you can."

"Aki's sick, is why. Should I really bring him over? Should Sana be in my car? I don't know. Where's mom?"

Why was it all going bad? I made a whining noise in my throat, frustration and desperation. What was Aki sick with?

She heard this. "I'll be there in a few minutes. We'll go to Tokyo, don't worry. Get Sana ready."

"But, you have the boys. There won't be enough room in the car. I don't know what do-o..." Choking started in my throat, watching Sana's eyes close over and over. He was definitely trying not to close them, but he couldn't help it. I wiggled my elbow, trying to get him to stop.

"We'll make room. Or I can drop them off at the library and leave them with Naoko. The library staff will understand. It's an emergency."

"There's not enough time for that! I don't know what to do-"

"I'll take care of them."

I jumped. My eyes went up, staring at Sawai-san. My mouth opened. She was sitting up straight, paying the utmost attention to our conversation.

She spoke again, furthering surprising me. "Tell her to bring them here. I'll take care of them. She can take you to Tokyo." Her face was so gentle. Calm, somehow.

"Excellent idea!" Natsuko exclaimed, her voice raised so Sawai-san could hear. "I'll be right there! We're turning on to your street!"

"Sawai-san..." I breathed. She was incredible.

We were standing in the driveway when Natsuko arrived. Sana was in my arms, still awake. Shinji ran out of the car, but Aki was slower. Natsuko assisted him, and he really did look sick. It worried me. What if Sana caught what he had? But we were going to the hospital. Surely they'd stop it if he got something from him? But, Sana was so sick...

Shinji stepped up to Sawai-san, looking her up and down. She smiled to him gently.

"You're hair's weird," he announced.

Her face became fierce. "Well, your face is weird, so we're even." His mouth dropped open. She took Aki's hand from Natsuko, twirling him in the other direction to go into the house. "Who wants ice cream?!" She sang, making a little dance up the driveway.

"I do, I do!" Shinji shouted, running after them.

We watched them safely go into the house. As soon as the door closed, Natsuko dove back into the car. I followed, carefully placing Sana on the backseat. I got in with him, pulling him into our usual position, his head on my chest as he laid against me.

We drove for a while, and I monitored his condition. He was definitely fighting sleep, doing a good job. He was aware that much to do that. My hand went into his hair, adoring him. His breaths were getting louder all the time. What did that mean?

"You're not as panicked as usual."

I looked up, almost forgetting where we were. "Oh- oh," I said, a little stunned hearing Natsuko's voice, confused.

"I'm surprised. You sounded pretty panicked on the phone, but you're a lot calmer than you usually are when Sana's having an emergency. I definitely noticed."

"Oh. I don't know." Sana's eyes fluttered, and I breathed inward. My hand went over his forehead, finally remembering to check his temperature. "Yokohara-sensei didn't think it was an emergency enough to take Sana immediately to the hospital. She wants him in observation, not the emergency department. Maybe that's it."

"Is that right? What's going on? He doesn't seem that okay to me, but I'm not a doctor. Does he have the flu or something? Sana, are you okay?" She glanced up in the mirror, checking on us briefly.

The flu. Relief spread through me. Maybe that's what it was. A simple explanation. The flu can cause symptoms like this, and a tummy flu could cause symptoms of like what he had for the past couple of days. Hope appeared in my heart.

"It might be the flu. He's been having some flu-like symptoms."

"Hmm. Okay."

I swept my fingers into his hair, to comfort him. She was right. Why was I so calm? It was different. His eyes closed, his eyelids sticking together, but he opened them again.

"Don't fall asleep," I whispered to him, poking the tip of his nose softly. The tiniest of smiles spread on his face, causing an involuntary one to bloom on mine, my heart so relieved.

When we got to the hospital, Yokohara-sensei was waiting for us. A bed was available for Sana in the observation department, and he was able to get there immediately. He was hooked up to the usual machines, and given a saline IV and nutrition. Routine by now. My calm feeling further surprised me.

It almost seemed...normal. So familiar.

She ordered tests to be done, and finally sat down with us.

"Your idea about the flu is interesting," she said, sitting across from us, her elbows on her knees. "But, his symptoms perfectly match something that happened some years ago, when he was much younger. So, I don't think it's the flu. I wouldn't doubt that he even recognizes the symptoms. It's just a hunch, though. I don't want you to take my word for it. That's why I wanted you to come up here. I don't want time to be wasted looking for something else."

"What is it? I've never heard of him being sick like this before," I said. Natsuko took my hand at this, even though I wasn't panicking. I was grateful.

"Well, the best answer I can give you is that I think the culprit might be his thyroid." She saw the confusion on our faces. "His thyroid doesn't act up much, but when it does it can mess up things greatly. Luckily, there's easy solutions. Usually, the problem disappears just as quickly as it appears for him, too. I can put him on a thyroid medication until it resolves. It really is mysterious. Usually hyper or hypo thyroid is a chronic condition, but it appears that his brain signals it to fire on and off at random, just like everything else. I also highly suspect his thyroid hormone is too high, because of his random high blood sugar spikes. You'd think they'd have nothing to do with each other, right? Well, think of the thyroid being like the brain of the endocrine system. When something is wrong with it, it can mess up a whole lot of things. I think these blood sugar spikes are a symptom, rather than the problem itself."

"Oh. Uh, I still don't understand," I admitted. She'd spoken so fast, talking about a lot of things I don't know about. I longed to know.

"It's okay. You'll get it over the next few days. These tests can take a while. We have to test before and after meals, and over different parts of the day. That's how we catch it, if it's the thyroid. It could be something else, but, I think that's what it is. It definitely sounds like the culprit, based on what happened before."

I hesitated. Natsuko squeezed my hand, I breathed out. "What's this about his blood sugar spikes? What do they have to do with this?"

"Overstimulation. It's cause and effect. His thyroid hormone being high could also explain why he's lost so much weight, and even his muscle weakness and shaking hands. It can cause frequent bowel movements, as well, such as what he's been having."

My mouth opened, in shock. She was right. When she explained it like that, everything fit into place.

"And what you said on the phone yesterday, about his device possibly being broken? It's not broken. I promise. It's doing its job amazingly well. It's catching things that we wouldn't otherwise have been aware of. Imagine if he didn't have it? Would we even know about the blood sugar part of this?" She reached out and touched my arm.

I was quiet for a minute, taking it all in. I finally spoke again. "What does this all mean? What's the long term? I didn't know he has problems like this. I'm still learning." My eyes stared at the floor now, thinking slowly about her words. I looked back up at her. She was giving me a gentle, caring smile.

"It's- Well, in the past, his thyroid symptoms have disappeared after a few months. I think it's just what his brain chooses to do. A lot of symptoms appear and disappear. Such as, his diabetes didn't used to be this way. I have hope that things will get better with it. However..." She paused for a moment, seeming to hesitate.

Natsuko squeezed my hand again in this brief moment, sensing what I did.

"But, things might get worse," I finished for her, in a voice much calmer than I expected.

She nodded. "Yeah," she breathed out. "They might. That's why I wanted you to come here, and not somewhere else. We know better how to treat him here, if things do."

None of us spoke after that. Natsuko continued to hold my hand, and I listened to the comforting beeps of Sana's machines, telling me he was okay for now. My thoughts floated in my head like a slowly tumbling cloud, mysteriously not the color of a storm, but a calmness throughout. The oddest feeling.

After a while, when Yokohara-sensei left, it occurred to me what was happening to myself. I was in deep shock, causing me to feel numb. No emotion able to penetrate, because the body is too overwhelmed to react. The suddenness of Sana vomiting today, his clammy skin, the darkness under his eyes, his loud breathing. All of it developing so quick, making me unsure what to do. The quietness in myself all day was my panic, manifesting in confusion, too many thoughts to make a coherent one.

When I realized this, I opened my arms to Natsuko, who was across from me, looking around in the cabinets being restless. She saw me do this, and she went to me, embracing me like I needed to be embraced. We hugged for a long time, as I realized the amount of unknown horror I was finding myself in once again, my panic finally rising.