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                        Lisa

The next morning I slowly get out of bed, not waking Lucious. I head into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. I walk over to the sink, looking into the mirror, running my hand through my hair as I take in a deep breath and slowly release it, trying to calm this strange feeling within me.

This restless on edge feeling that I've been feeling for weeks now seems to only be growing stronger. I barely got any sleep last night. Throughout the night I would get this sudden rush that would cause my heart to start to race. My body would suddenly get hot and the beast within would constantly pushing forward to be let out.

It's hard to explain the feeling, but I feel this overwhelming feeling inside.

I frown as I pull my lip back, looking at my slightly elongated fangs. My frown deepens, wondering if something is wrong. Am I sick or something? I look at myself in the mirror. I slightly shake my head. No, I can't be sick. I haven't experienced sickness since I shifted and my body became immune to any virus.

I stare at myself in the mirror, not knowing why I'm feeling this way.

I'm sure it's nothing. I'm sure this will go away, I tell myself, taking in another breath, slowly releasing it.

I walk over to the shower, turning on the cold water, then strip down, stepping inside.

I let out a sigh of relief, feeling the cold water hit my hot skin, cooling my body. I close my eyes as I look up, letting the cold water falls into my face. Giving me something else to focus on, the cold water helps to calm the beast within.

I take in a breath and exhale as this overwhelming feeling slowly starts to fade.

I stand here underneath the showerhead, letting the cold water run over my body. I never imagined a cold shower feeling so great.

Feeling a bit better, I turn the shower off and step out the shower, drying off.

Wrapping the towel around me, I leave out the bathroom, seeing Lucious is now awake, getting out of bed.

"Goodmorning," I say, going over to the dresser, grabbing a pair of underwear.

I look over at him as I close the drawer, watching the way he just stands there staring at me the way he does sometimes. I've grown used to the way he watches me. Sometimes I find myself watching him and by the time I realize I'm staring, it's too late and we're looking into each other eyes.

I take my underwear and head into the closet to find clothes to put on.

As I get dressed, I hear the room door open and close, letting me know that Lucious has left the room.

Once I get dressed, I leave the closet, going over to the mirror where my hair supplies are. I let out a sigh as I begin to brush my wet hair together.

I pin my hair up in a bun, before leaving the room.

Heading down the stairs, I see Tilda at the bottom of the stairs, coming up. She's not here much now. I guess she didn't want to be here with me, so she's been staying at the packhouse, which I don't mind. That saves me from an argument every time we see each other around the house. The only time she's ever here now is to see their mother.

She glares at me, coming up the stairs. I ignore it, letting out a sigh as I go down the stairs. I'm really not in the mood for her and whatever altercation she's looking to start today.

As she passes me, she purposely leans over, bumping her shoulder into me. "Watch where you're going." She stops, glaring at me like she's not the one who just bumped into me.

A growl vibrates my chest as the beast within pushes forward, clawing at me. "No, you watch where you're going." I glare back at her, getting the sudden rush. My heart starts to race, causing my body to heat up again.

My lip pulls back in a snarl, flashing teeth. I don't know if I'm more irritated with her or the fact that I've now wasted that cold shower, because she always finds a way to agitate me, riling the beast within.

"Make me." I can feel the power leaking from her as she flashes teeth back at me.

All I can hear is the sound of my racing heart. Being consumed by this sudden rush, I start to feel this strong urge to sink my teeth into her throat.

Her being Lucious sister, me not wanting to cause more problems here, none of that seems to matter at this moment. My jaws clench as my teeth and claws elongate, ready to give her the fight she's so desperately looking for.

Hearing the front door open and close snaps me back. I look over, seeing the healer who comes every day to change their mother iv bag.

I glare back over at Tilda who's still glaring at me.

"Walk away Lisa, just walk away," I tell myself over and over as I glare back at Tilda, holding her gaze.

The healer stops in front of us, unable to pass by. Deciding it's not worth it, I glare at her for a second longer, before continuing to make my way down the stairs.

I head into the kitchen where Lucious is sitting at the counter eating. He looks over at me as I walk over to the refrigerator, grabbing a cold bottle of water.

I walk over and take the seat next to Lucious, placing the cold water bottle to the side of my face, trying to calm this feeling the way the cold shower did.

I close my eyes, taking in slow steady breaths, feeling myself calming down.

"Are you okay?" I look over at Lucious to see him looking at me with a slight frown.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I remove the water bottle from my face and twist the cap off, taking a sip.

"I felt you tossing and turning through the night, what was that about?" He asks with a raised brow.

"Just had one of those sleepless nights I guess," I say, not telling him why I couldn't get any sleep. I don't want for him to think something is wrong with me.

I look down at Lucious's plate of food. I look away, taking another sip from the water bottle, not having an appetite to eat this morning.

I spend the day up in the room, trying to keep myself calm and relax. I've been on edge and something as simple as a loud sound seems to give me this rush, causing the beast within to push forward to be let out.

I sit on the bed reading the book that I had started a few months ago. Between the Retributions and spending most of my time in the forest, I haven't read much of the book since then. I guess now is the perfect time to catch up on the book.

I sit here on the bed reading, trying to ignore this on edge feeling that I feel.

Once I finally get to the bookmark where Lucious left it, I close the book to continue reading another time.

I leave the room and head down to the office where I know I'll find Lucious.

Lucious looks over at me from behind the desk as I walk into the office. I walk over around the desk, next to him, looking at the papers he's busy with. "What's this?" I ask, looking at all the different numbers on the paper in front of him.

"The report on how much income the businesses we own are bringing in." He moves the paper to the side, looking at another paper full of numbers.

"So this is where all the money comes from for the pack?" I ask, looking at the paper. I always wondered how Lucious is always getting everything for the pack when nobody around here seems to work to make money.

"Yeah." He let out a sigh of irritation, causing me to feel like I'm bothering him while he does this.

"Am I bugging you?" I frown. If he doesn't want me in here with him, I'll leave.

He looks over at me, seeing the frown on my face. "Of course not. It's just this paperwork can become a pain in the ass at times." He lay the pen down and slightly wince as he rolls his wrist, opening and closing his hand.

I reach out, taking his hand in mines and take a seat on top of the desk in front of him. Ignoring those pleasurable tingles, I begin to massage the tensed muscles in his hand the way I've seen mother do to Andy many times after he has come from the greenhouse planting herbs.

His hand relaxes in mines as I massage it. He sits there staring at me the way he does, not saying anything.

"If you'll show me what all needs to be done when handling the paperwork, then I can help," I say, looking over at him as I continue to massage the tense muscles in his hand.

"It's fine, it's not your job to do those things." He says, watching me.

"I don't mind helping." I move to his wrist and forearm, gently massaging his muscles, letting his hand rest on my bare thigh Where my shorts stop at.

Feeling those tingles slowly spread across my thigh, causes my core to heat up and dampen. It's impossible to control these feelings I get when he touches me.

His nose slightly flares, inhaling the scent of my arousal, causing his arousal to fill the air. It's not the first time he has smelt the way he causes me to react to him and it not the first time he has reacted this way towards me and I'm sure it won't be the last.

He slowly stands up from the chair in front of me as I sit on the desk. He reaches out, letting the tips of his fingers lightly glide across my lips. "It's fine, I can take care of the paperwork." He licks his lips, watching his fingers move over my lips.

"I d-do-don't mind helping." My voice comes out in a low stutter, repeating myself as I look up at this male who the goddess has given to me.

He leans in, kissing my lips. I kiss him back, letting my hand rest against his abs. I close my eyes, savoring the sweet taste of his lips.

I spread my legs, pulling him closer to me by his shirt, wanting to feel his body against mines, wanting to feel him inside of me. But I know this moment won't last long before he pulls away. He always pulls away, fighting the pull of the bond.

His hands grip my waist, pulling me closer to him. I continue to kiss his soft lips, letting my hands slide underneath his shirt.

Breathing heavily, he pulls away, resting his forehead against mines. "We need to get going, well be late for the pack dinner." He says.

"We don't have to go." I start to kiss him again, wanting to feel his lips against mines.

He kisses me back, before pulling away again. "We have to go to the pack dinner." He says, taking a step back this time.

I look at him, letting out a sigh, I knew he would pull away. I get off the desk and leaI'd the office to go put on more clothes to go to this stupid pack dinner.

Once we get to the building, Lucious walk to the front getting his food, while I have to wait in line with the others. I watch as he walks over to his table that's already full, but they always leave the empty seat for him.

I never get to eat with Lucious at his table. I would like to eat at his table with him, but Lucious table always seems to fill up fast. I guess everyone wants to sit at the table and eat with their alpha.

I always eat with Maggie. I'm sure she used to always eat at Lucious talk with her mate, but now she eats with me so I can have company.

I look away from Lucious table, ignoring the glare and growls I get every Saturday at the pack dinner. I take in a calming breath, feeling that sudden rush coming.

I continue to take in calming breaths, trying not to let them agitate me any further.

The line moves at a fast pace like normally and by no time I'm at the tables, that's filled with food.

I fill my plate with food and as I turn to go to my seat, a female bumps into me, knocking my food all over me.

"Excuse you." She and her friends laugh, looking at the food all over my clothes.

A deep growl vibrates my chest as my heart starts to race. Feeling this sudden rush, my breathing picks up as I glare at her and her laughing friends.

The beast pushes forward, clawing at me to be let out. The muscles underneath my skin ripple, getting ready for the shift. I continue to take in breaths, trying to calm myself.

I can hear the sound of my thumping heart in my ears. My body heats up and my teeth and claws come out. Another deep growl vibrates my chest as my jaw and facial bones start to shift a bit, feeling my control slipping away.

Feeling everyone's eyes on me, I glare around, seeing the watching eyes. My eyes land on Lucious as he just sits there watching. Some of them laugh as they watch, not knowing the danger they're in. If I lose control to the beast, it will be a bloodbath in here.

I continue to breathe, trying to force the beast back.

"Lisa." Maggie walks over to me, carrying her pup in her arms.

I need to get out of here.

I head to the door, leaving out the building. Once outside, I drop down onto the snow on my hands and knees, trying to stop myself from shifting.

I grab a hand full of snow, pressing it to the side of my face and neck, trying to cool my body down.

"Lisa." I hear Lucious behind me.

"Leave me alone Lucious," I growl out. He can go back inside and watch his pack laugh.

"Lisa." He calls my name again, reaching out touching me.

"Go back to your stupid pack!" My voice comes out animalistic, glaring back at him. He didn't say anything in there, so don't pretend to be concerned about me now! I slowly stand to my feet, walking away, heading to the forest.

Once I get to the dark forest, I shift, raising up on my hind legs, letting out a loud roar that shakes arms snow off branches on the trees. I drop down on all fours and take off deep into the snowy forest.

I run deeper into the dark forest and continue to run for hours, trying to calm this rush and anger I feel.

I've never felt this rush before, it's like something is pulling at me to give in to the wild in me.

After running and running I come to this cave. I enter it, seeing that it's empty. Feeling tired from running, I drop down on the cave floor to rest for a second.

I feel my eyes slowly closing as I lay here. I...just need to rest...for..a litt..........

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