I sat in Xavier's kitchen, eating my dinner before it went cold. Xavier wasn't here because he had pack business to attend to, so I was all alone. The dishes were all cleared up other than the one I was eating from and I had actually completed all of my homework for once. Thus, it was looking like I had absolutely nothing to do with my evening. 

My head felt pretty light and my eyes stung from tiredness, but I was used to it. I still hadn't slept, so I was really pushing it now. I spent most of my evenings at Xavier's alone like this, since I didn't sleep and he, of course, did. Except, every night he would take some time before bed to have a conversation with me on the balcony. It was my favourite part of every night- not that I would tell him that.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I was grateful that Xavier was letting me stay here, but I longed to go out like I used to. Obviously, I couldn't do that anymore- not with Jude on the loose. I was having to find other ways to entertain myself, so it was handy that Xavier also had a Netflix subscription. 

I washed up my bowl and dropped onto the sofa, staring up at the high ceiling. Xavier had only left a few hours ago, but I already missed him. Clearly, the mate bond was to blame. When Xavier was here, I was craving his touch and when he wasn't, I was still craving his touch- it's a lose, lose situation for me. I just couldn't get him off my mind.

I pulled out my phone, playing around on a few apps before I caved and decided to just text him. 

'Hey, how's the meeting?' -Me

I didn't have to wait long for his reply, per usual. Is he this quick of a replier to everyone or is it just for me? It seems as if he's always on his phone, but surely that's not the case? 

'Boring. Safe to presume that you're missing me too right now?' -Stalker

I blushed; he was right about that. Per usual, I had a million questions- did he miss me more than usual now? Or just a normal amount? Why could I feel it too? Was it a mate thing? The answers to those questions were bound to only confuse me more, so I just went with it. 

'Maybe. Maybe not.' -Me

'That's a yes. I'll be back in ten.' -Stalker

My mouth dropped open at that. He was coming home now? I hadn't expected him to drop everything just to come see me because I was bored and missed him. Knowing Xavier, trying to talk him out of t would be fruitless, so I guess he's coming back now.

Rolling off of the sofa, I dashed into the kitchen to take out the leftovers from dinner. Warming them up didn't take very long, but it was even less time before Xavier was flinging open the front door. 

"I didn't mean for you to come back!" I protested the moment he walked in, which he unsurprisingly ignored. 

"I've worked all day and all evening every day this week; I deserve a break." Xavier shrugged, kicking off his shoes.

"You're sure it won't upset the elders?" I frowned, worried about what they would think. 

"You think they're at the meeting? Old pricks would never miss out on their beauty sleep for the pack and Noah's not a snitch." Xavier joked, dumping his coat on the sofa as he crossed the room. 

I didn't have time to reply before he was wrapping his arms around me tightly, breathing in my scent as he cuddled me. I relaxed into the hug, smiling slightly at the comforting vibrations. 

"Plus, Kodiak really missed you." Xavier whispered, burying his nose in my hair, "It's hard to only see you in passing when the whole house smells like you."

"Just Kodiak?" I teased.

"Of course I missed you too- I'm the one who ran the whole way over here from the pack house, after all." Xavier chuckled, "You cooked again- what's on the menu?"

"Just some pesto pasta; I'm feeling quite exhausted." I muttered, still hugging Xavier close. 

"You need to get some sleep tonight, before you pass out somewhere." Xavier warned, "My mum says thank you for cooking by the way. She used to have to bring me food every night after pack meetings because I was too busy to cook." 

"I was wondering why this place was fully stocked with food and spotless when I came." I snorted, "There's no way a Uni student was that clean."

"She's kept away from the house now that you're here." He explained, making me bite my lip anxiously.

"You talk about me with her?" 

"Noah wasn't joking when he said that you're all I talk about." Xavier blushed slightly at the confession, "She can't wait to meet you. Obviously, there's no pressure on you to meet her; I gather that you probably haven't met a partner's parents before?"

"Never." I confirmed, "I'd like to, though. You seem close." 

"We could go over for dinner sometime next week? It would be good for you to know a few more people before the party." 

"Sure." I nodded, ignoring the knot of anxiety that I felt in my chest.

"I've ran into a problem here." Xavier mumbled into my hair, "I don't want to let you go, but I'm starving and the food smells so good." 

Rolling my eyes, I felt a slight blush grace my cheeks as I separated myself from his arms. He was such a flirt, but I secretly loved it. With every passing day, the awkward feeling I got towards romantic gestures was lessening. I wasn't sure how to act before, but Xavier had been nothing but welcoming and reassuring, so I was quickly loosening up.

Xavier was keen to dig into his food, sliding into his chair as I retrieved the pasta from the warm oven. Knowing that his appetite was a lot larger than a humans, I had learnt to adjust the portion sizes to accommodate this. It was still gone in mere minutes, however.  

"That was great!" Xavier beamed at me, "Can we cuddle now?" 

"Clingy." I teased, smiling at his eagerness.

"Who texted who first?" He shot back, "Exactly. Give me cuddles." 

"Yes, Alpha." I said mockingly, rolling my eyes.

His eyes darkened at that and I barked a laugh. Really? 

"It's not my fault!" Xavier groaned, rubbing his eyes furiously.

"Kodiak, Kodiak, Kodiak." I teased, rubbing salt in the wound. 

Xavier's eyes darkened a shade further and he let out a low growl, sending shivers down my spine. I couldn't help but appreciate how good he looked right now; his button down shirt had the first few buttons undone and he looked dishevelled, but sexy. 

"Baby, stop it." Xavier's voice was deep and full of authority, snapping me out of my thoughts instantly, but it only made the feelings worse. 

"Then you stop it!" I managed to reply, my voice a lot higher pitched than normal with how flustered I was. 

"You did it on purpose, calling Kodiak like that." Xavier murmured, his eyes still just as dark as they roamed over me.

"You only made it worse by calling me baby." I muttered, looking anywhere but at Xavier.

"I'm going to go take a cold shower because you're killing me, baby. Choose a film and we'll watch it in bed? That way you can fall asleep." Xavier proposed, "I won't sleep there, of course. I'll leave."

"Why?" 

The question was supposed to seem innocent, but because of the previous tension it just came off as sexual. I genuinely just wanted him to stay because it helped me sleep last time; no impure thoughts present. Xavier's eyes darkened again and he groaned, burying his head in his hands to try and regain some control over Kodiak. 

"I just meant that you don't have to leave! It wasn't supposed to be a sexual thing." I pouted, my cheeks red.

"I'm gonna go shower, baby." Xavier smiled, shaking his head as he jogged upstairs. 

When I was sure he was out of earshot, I cussed and kicked the sofa corner in frustration. Why was this whole thing so damn awkward? I used to be the chilled out and uncaring person, but around Xavier I seemed to melt. Overthinking things and blushing had become part of my everyday interactions, which was frustrating. Despite being the one with more experience, I was way out of my depth. 

I downed a cold glass of water to settle my nerves and headed upstairs to Xavier's room, hearing the shower running in the en-suite. I stepped into his wardrobe, picking out a random t.shirt and pulled mine off, replacing it with Xaviers. It was pretty hot in the house, so I kicked off my jeans and decided to just sleep in my boxers. 

Grabbing the TV remote, I climbed into bed and decided to put on the 'What We Do in the Shadows' movie. We had both seen it, so I thought it could act as background noise while we chatted and chilled. This bed was really damn comfy. 

The steady pattering noise from the shower ceased and I waited for him to exit the bathroom, feeling oddly nervous. This technically wasn't any different to any other conversation Xavier and I had had, but it felt strangely intimate because we were going to be together in his bed. If I was feeling this nervous and he wasn't even in the same room yet, imagine how I'd act with him in the bed. 

The bathroom door creaked open after a while and Xavier emerged in pyjama bottoms, completely shirtless. He was busy towel drying his head (despite having barely any hair there), so he didn't notice my eyes raking over him repeatedly... Or so I thought. 

"Baby, I told you I can smell it." Xavier groaned, "I literally just calmed down."

"Sorry." I mumbled, feeling embarrassed. 

"No, don't be. I just really want to kiss you." Xavier sighed, "I like how you react to me- it makes me happy."

"I mean, you don't have to wait until a date to kiss me." I shrugged.

"No, I wanna make this special for you. I want it to feel normal." Xavier shook his head.

"I'd say it's pretty normal to kiss before a first date." I bit my lip, a playful smile tugging on my lips.

"Yeah?" Xavier's eyes suddenly darkened, "I have permission?" 

I simply nodded, since my mouth had gone completely dry. Before me stood the sexiest man alive, shirtless and asking whether he could kiss me. Words no longer existed in this moment; I could barely even think. The only thing I could focus on was Xavier and how much I wanted him. 

He crossed the room and crawled onto the bed, right on top of me. My breath hitched in my throat and I looked up at him with wide eyes, waiting for him to just finally crash his lips against mine. It was literally all I wanted right now. It was literally all I wanted since the moment I first laid eyes on him.

His dark eyes dragged up and down me before they settled on my lips, growing even darker. I bit them out of nervousness, which seemed to just make him want them more. The silence was deafening, but the tension in the air was absolutely crushing it was just that heavy with lust. 

He leaned in slightly and I let out a gasp, thinking that he was finally going to kiss me, but he simply hovered over my lips. Everywhere his body was touching mine was lighting up like fireworks on bonfire night, driving me insane. They were growing stronger and stronger the more heated it got and I couldn't imagine what it would feel like to finally kiss him. 

"Let's just cuddle." He whispered, pulling away from me with a smirk. 

I blinked once. Then twice. A third time... Did Xavier really just tease me like that? 

"You dickhead." I groaned, burying my face in my hands. 

"Just payback for winding Kodiak up." Xavier smirked, rolling over and settling into his side of the bed. 

My whole body was burning red hot and I was way more than just flustered. It's unbelievable what kind of effect Xavier has on me- he could do this without even kissing me. No girl had even got me mildly flustered before, but Xavier did it like it was as easy as making tea. 

"Come cuddle, baby." Xavier murmured, patting his chest for me to lay on. 

I sent him one last playful glare before accepting his invitation to cuddle. My head felt overwhelmingly heavy and my eyes needed some rest soon. The tingles were much more subdued now, feeling comforting on my skin rather than electrifyingly passionate. 

He played with my hair while we watched the movie, mostly just talking about how our days were and getting to know each other in general. I didn't even feel a craving for a cigarette, just enjoying Xavier's touch and company instead. 

Towards the end of the film, I must have drifted off to sleep because I don't remember seeing the credits roll. I couldn't help it when I was Xavier, he was just so calming that all the troubling thoughts that usually swarmed my head at nighttime just went away.