When I was finally allowed to check myself out of hospital, I welcomed the outside world with open arms. Mum loaded my balloons, get well soon cards and flowers into the car, watching me act like an idiot with a cocked eyebrow. She was still pretty mad- her mind was convinced that Xavier had been funnelling me drugs and that I was protecting him. 

If only she knew it wasn't quite as simple as drug withdrawals.

I wish I could chalk that terrifying episode down to me being reckless with drugs, but I honestly didn't know what it was. It had been driving me crazy- trying to figure out what was wrong with me was fruitless. I honestly thought I was going to die at one point that night; the pain was harrowing.

Xavier had promised me my long awaited answers and I planned to get them as soon as possible. I'd had a lot of downtime to think about everything and I wasn't letting him back out of telling me now. I needed to know.

"Come on, it's late. I'd like to get home." Mum waved me over to the car, starting the ignition. 

I jumped in, filled with relief that I was finally leaving. I wasn't a big fan of hospitals at the best of times, especially not when the doctor was kind of unnerving. He was absolutely adamant that I must have taken something, pushing that theory onto my mum- who in turn blamed Xavier. Little did she know, my friends were the ones who did the drugs, not Xavier. Hell, one of them was a damn drug dealer. 

"Straight to bed tonight." Mum lectured, "You need all the rest you can get. I don't think you should be going to any parties, not for a while. You should know better than to do drugs, Cam! I'll be keeping a closer eye on you."

"I told you, I don't take drugs." I groaned.

It wasn't a total lie. I do drugs, but I hadn't done the drugs that they were accusing me of doing. That doctor had an agenda, I swear to god. My friends had all visited this morning, bringing me gifts to make me feel better. I was glad they didn't mention Xavier, because it would have set my mum off again. 

I knew for a fact that what I was experiencing that night wasn't drug withdrawals. I had a feeling it was all connected to Xavier and judging by his reaction to me being in the hospital, I was right. All I needed now were answers. 

My stomach growled- I was really looking forward to normal, non-hospital food. I hadn't been in there long, but it was long enough to make me see junk food in a new light. I had taken it for granted, when I should be thanking my lucky stars that I didn't live on a diet of hospital food. Also, I was literally dying for a cigarette. I had left my pack in my room, since I had obviously left in a rush, and I couldn't smoke my friends stash when they visited because Mum was watching me like a hawk.

I may be eighteen, but she'd still throw a hissy fit if I told her I smoked regularly. Especially now that she thought I was some druggie teen. I blame the doctor for that entirely; what a dickhead thing to say.

We pulled up to the house and I breathed a sigh of relief. I had spent way too much time cooped up in a room with Mum, so it was nice to have the opportunity to have my own space back. I was glad she found me when she did and I appreciated it, but there's only a certain amount of snide, accusatory remarks I can take. 

Mum unlocked the front door and I bounded upstairs, telling her that I was going to go straight to bed, since it was late at night. I looked around my room, my stomach sinking. Everything was exactly how I left it that night, the bathroom light still on. Good thing she'd turned the shower off, or that would probably still be running too. 

I locked my bedroom door behind me, switching off the bathroom light and going straight for my snack collection. I grabbed a packet of biscuits and a bag of crisps, taking them to my window. The immaculate sea salt and cider vinegar taste came highly anticipated after only eating unseasoned potatoes in different forms for a week. 

I swung the window open, revelling in the cold night air whipping through my hair. The trees were making that sound that I had missed so much while I was gone, their leaves brushing up against each other and blowing in the wind. I climbed up on the window sill, letting my legs swing over the edge happily. I snacked on the glorious crisps and chocolate covered biscuits, looking out at the trees. 

It started spitting rain, the sound was so immensely relaxing to me for some reason. I loved how it built up from a small pitter patter to a full blown hammering sound, the fat raindrops changing the colour of the concrete as they splattered against it. 

I had my fill of junk food, eventually pushing the digestives away in favour of a pack of cigarettes. Here I was, eating junk food and about to smoke after I had just been released from hospital. What a picture of health I am. 

I rested the cigarette between my lips, happily lighting it up as I relaxed to the sound of the rain. I really wanted to go out, take a walk and enjoy the feeling of rain on my bare skin. What's stopping me? 

I grabbed some shoes, climbing out of the window and edging along the window sill. I balanced along the garage roof, shimmying down the drain pipe. The pain splattered on my skin, cooling me down. It was quite a refreshing feeling, my hair absorbing all the moisture that landed on my head. 

I wandered down my road, slotting in my earphones and blaring music. I had a slight skip to my step, grooving through the rain. I felt free again. Well, not completely free, but a lot better than I felt trapped inside the hospital. I still had to take the long way, because my subconscious was telling me to avoid the tree line. 

I nodded my head along to the rock music, making my way to the park. Glancing behind me, I could see my usual nighttime allocated stalker following me. I sent him a small wave and he sent one back, surprising me. That's the first time he acknowledged me back. I popped out my earphones, pressing pause on my music.

"Are you feeling better?" He called, sounding genuinely concerned. 

"You all heard about that?" I chuckled, "I'm fine now, thanks. Sorry for dragging you out in the rain." 

"It's all good. Enjoy your night." He shrugged, ending the conversation there. 

I nodded, slotting my earphones back in. I blared the music, grooving the rest of the way to the park. I was soaking wet now, but I had enjoyed it so much. I didn't spot the twins in the park, but I made my way to the swings anyway. 

I took Mick's usual seat, swinging back and forth slightly as I pulled out my phone. Droplets splashed against the screen, making it hard to see, but I managed to pull up Mick's contact, giving him a call. It rang and rang, but he didn't pick up. I tried Mike next.

"Cam?" Mike's confused voice rang through, "I thought you were in hospital."

"I was let out; I'm at the park." I explained quickly. 

"Well, be careful." Mike warned, "Do you want us to come?"

"Not if you're staying in tonight, it's chill." I brushed it off, "I'll see you another night."

"Sorry, Mick hates getting damp. See you soon, Cam." Mike hung up, leaving me alone. 

I tucked my phone away, ignoring all of the unread messages from Xavier that I had accumulated over the last week and a bit. I hadn't answered, or read, a single one of them since that phone call on the day that we were supposed to have our date... The day I found out that girl died. 

I looked up at the sky, water droplets landing on my face as it continued to hammer down with rain. I was only wearing a short sleeved band tee, so I felt a shiver run down my spine. It was pretty nippy out now that I wasn't in the warmth of my own bedroom- I didn't mind it too much, though. I'd rather be cold than boiling hot like I felt when I was admitted to hospital. 

I cringed, remembering the way it felt. If I could do something to never feel like that again, I wouldn't even think twice: I'd just do it. Quit smoking? Sure. Quit drinking? Okay. I'd do anything to make sure I didn't ever scare myself, my mum and my friends like that again.

I got a familiar feeling in my chest, growing stronger and stronger as the seconds went on. I glanced behind me, seeing Xavier stood in the rain. He was bundled up in a coat, a scarf wrapped around his neck and holding an umbrella over his head. 

My heart jumped when I saw him. He looked insanely hot, I had to admit. He looked cosy and warm, compared to my cold and wet skin. I tore my eyes away, working hard to calm my heart down. I looked straight forward, saying nothing as he took a seat on the swing next to me. 

"We need to talk." He muttered.

I simply nodded in response. We have a lot of things to talk about. He'd promised me answers, no matter what. I was willing to hear him out, because I needed to know. I don't think I'd ever be able to move on unless I knew why everything had happened the way it had over the last month.

I pulled out a cigarette, doing my best to light it in the rain and wind. I savoured the test, letting it calm me as Xavier matched my gentle swinging, staring at me intently. I looked up at the sky, admiring the swirling, dark grey clouds. It was pretty, but I felt like the weather was going to get a hell of a lot worse soon; I should probably head home before I catch a cold. 

"Can we go somewhere a little more dry? Besides, I can't tell you everything properly in a public space." He seemed nervous, as scared as I was about the conversation that was about to take place.

"Anywhere in mind? Everything's pretty much closed right now." I pointed out, letting the rain drum against my face as I looked up. 

"We could go to my house?" He suggested, "If you don't want to, that's understandable. I just need to say this in private."

"You live alone?" I asked, surprised. 

"The job comes with perks." He seemed bashful, "How else would a twenty-one year old own their own house." 

"You own it, too? Job must pay well." I joked meekly, debating on what to do internally, "Where's the house?"

"That's the thing. It's in the middle of the woods." He cringed, "It sounds dodgy, but there's a whole neighbourhood of houses- It's not just mine." 

That comment threw my mind back to a conversation that I'd had with Heather not too long ago. She had mentioned rumours about an estate in the woods, fenced off and surrounded by cameras. I hadn't known about Xavier and his dodgy business at the time, but now it makes perfect sense that they would own the secret community in the forest. 

Was it a good idea to follow Xavier into the forest late at night? Probably not. I wish I thought he was probably a murderer, but the truth is I didn't. I didn't think he had a bad bone in his entire body and that frustrated me. I felt like I was behaving so naive and love-struck, but I just knew. 

"Fine. Let's go before I change my mind." I decided.