My eyes felt like it was being closed by the force of laziness and exhaustion. My fatigue could be compared to the day where my parents conducted a "A healing day" program where I cure everyone's sickness. I forced my eyes to open and realized that I was in our classroom, alone.

What?

Why didn't anyone wake me up? How rude.

Well I guess I was the rude one since I was the one who slept during the time of my education. I stood up from my seat and carried my backpack. Did no one really bother waking me up? That's odd.

I walked out of our classroom and heard the faint sound of voices from somewhere. My curiosity was caught in an instant when the sound got harsher as if something was being thrown. Laughter followed the constant hit and break of wood and glass. Fear struck my whole being when I heard the word "Faggot."

Don't tell me it was Edward and his goons bullying another student? I kept my footsteps quiet as I located the source of the ruckus. I ended up at the room across the hallway. The door was open so I got a glimpse of well built bodies kicking something...or rather someone on the floor.

Oh my Lord...

Why would they reach to such violent ways?

"Edward!" I called out. 

The three studs suddenly froze....yes froze with their legs in a kicking position. I cautiously walked towards them and took a peek of the boy who they were bullying. My legs shook violently when I saw the person leaking out blood. His whole body seemed to have been soaked in it. He lied on the ground lifelessly. His eyes were bloodshot and his mouth was slightly ajar.

I gasp when I heard the boy let out a strangled moan. His lower body began to sink in the puddle of blood. I stood paralyzed in my place. I don't know if I should run or help the poor boy. Fortunately, my body chose the latter. I dropped down on my knees, not caring if the floor was drenched with blood. I grabbed the boy's arm and started to pull. What was this?

What in the world was happening?!

"Help! Edward!" I wheezed. No matter how much my adrenaline aided me in this tag-of-war, the boy continued to sink. My eyes looked down upon the boy I was helping. His eyes were filled with fear and his mouth attempted to say something.

"Oh my God, please if you can hear me, please pray to the Lord. Stay strong for Him!" I encouraged him breathlessly. The boy's frightened eyes were suddenly replaced with anger. His arms instantly shot out and his bloody hands grasped my face roughly.

"Is this what your God wants? Is this what you call Love?!" He screamed at me with such hatred and rage that my eyes started to produce tears.

I must...I must strengthen my faith!

"Look at me! Look at what your God's people did to me!" I shut my eyes in fear and tried to pull away from the painful grasp. This was...this was the doing of the devil. He wanted me to lose my faith and turn away from the Lord. I can't let him win! No matter what his reasons were for betraying our Father I will never follow his steps!

"Please...This isn't what our Father wanted. He would never, ever want this to happen to you!"

The boy let out sobs of agony. Every sob sent fear and sadness to my heart but then his pitiful cries shifted into a blast of nefarious laughter that echoed inside of my head.

"Your God is not good. He never was! He is a sadistic, selfish, and pri-" his unholy sentence was cut off when he coughed. I opened my eyes when his hands retracted from my face. He clutched his throat and continuously coughed. Edward instantly came to his aid and bent down.

"Well that was embarrassing..." Edward murmured and I just looked at the two with so much bewilderment. Edward started patting his back until the last sound of discomfort.

"Ugh, remind me not to eat too much spicy squid for breakfast..." He grumbled. After a moment of awkward silence, the guy in the puddle of blood sighed. "I'm not in the mood now..." He added. His bored expression changed when he diverted his gaze to me. "Hear me human!" He suddenly snarled making me flinch. His body floated up in the air and he pointed his finger to me. "Your God sucks!"

The ground shook in such intensity. I looked at the weird guy and his frightening face before my eyes reopened and I was lying on a hospital bed.

So it was only a dream...what a weird one.

"Oh! Keetan!" A female voice spoke in excitement. Soft mounds of flesh dropped down on my face and I had to close my eyes in disgust. I was never a fan of female breasts. I don't know why but I find a man's sculpt chest more appealing.

"Sofia, please, I can't breathe!"

The blonde girl let out a giggle and straightened her fitted dress. Sofia was the daughter of our pastor. She was nice, caring, and also homophobic. She was just like her dad. We knew each other ever since our old pastor died two years ago.

"I'm sorry Keetan, I'm just so worried about you!"

I gave her a small smile. "Thank you for your concern."

The door of the room opened and my parents and the pastor got in. My mom immediately latched herself on me and rubbed her cheek against my face. "Oh baby! I'm so glad you're awake now! I was worried that our healing program this Wednesday will be canceled."

I swallowed the soreness occurring in my throat and tried to fight the tears away. I expected them to be worried because I was their son but it would seem that they only cared about me since I was the key to their wealth. One tear escaped and it did not go unnoticed by my dad.

"Look at you son, you must be tearing up because you'll be able to continue your service to humanity especially to us! Don't worry, we will collect more money for your faithful service to our Lord."

"Amen!" Our pastor chuckled. "We're glad you're fine Keetan. Please don't forget that you are very important to the church. Do try to take care of yourself better."

I nodded at them sadly. I love serving the church and bringing joy to our people but...I feel like I was a tool for money. The doctors saw nothing that we should be worried about. They allowed me to go home already and so we left. Derek assisted me to my room and it was by his mouth that I heard a genuine care for my well-being not because I was the faith-healer.

"Are you okay son?"

I nodded at him. "Yes Sir."

Derek sat me gently on the bed and patted my head. "I know you aren't fine Keetan." You know when someone asked you something but they won't even accept your answer really annoyed me a little. But at this point in time, I appreciate Derek's fatherly concern.

I raised my eyes at the understanding man and stopped myself from breaking down in front of him to cry. I must be strong. A true servant of the Lord should be strong. "I...I'm a bit tired Sir."

"Would you like anything?"

I looked down in thought. "Maybe some milk?"

Derek nodded. "I'll fetch you some in the kitchen then."

I watch him go out of the room and close the door. I weakly push myself backwards until I reached my headboard and silently prayed. I was near in finishing my prayer when the door was slammed open by no other than my overexcited father. He was holding some thick magazines. I slightly glared at him for ruining my prayers and he sat down at the edge of my bed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked me.

If I were to be honest, I will tell him that I was so annoyed but I remembered that our Father ordered to respect thy parents.

"I'm tired..."

My dad placed the thick magazines on my lap and my eyes widened from the vulgarity of them. There were naked women in the front page that I had to throw the magazines to the wall making my dad protest.

I want to vomit! My Lord that was disgusting!

"Hey!"

"Dad, those are very filthy!"

My dad sighed and placed his hands on top of my shoulder. "Son, you have to see those. It is part of growing up to be a man. And besides, this is my way of preventing you to become a disgusting faggot."

My dad stood up and gathered the magazines in his hands. He placed them under my bed and then winked at me. "Don't be shy, just work on that dick. Those busty women will surely make you dream something good."

More like give me nightmares.

Derek went in just in time for my dad to go out. I glared at my father's back until Derek cleared his throat. "Is everything alright?"

"My dad just showed me pornography."

Derek chuckled. "I think it's a part of growing up." He handed me the glass of milk and I took a sip.

"I'm not interested and having dirty and lustful thoughts is a sin."

Derek rubbed his nape and shrugged. "I guess...Well then Keetan. I'll be going now."

I let out a deep breath and tried to relax myself. "Thank you sir. Do take care of yourself."

"I should be the one telling you that. At a young age, you have too much responsibilities on your hands. Enjoy yourself for once Keetan. I'm sure the Lord will he happy to see one of His loyal and faithful servants enjoying himself." He ruffled my hair and got out of my room, gently closing the door. I gulped down the whole glass of milk and roughly wiped my lips. I got off my bed and grabbed the magazines from under my bed. I will throw these out. I will not let my dad-

"What the?"

I shut my eyes hard and reopened them to see if I was imagining things. The naked women before were replaced with nude men.

I licked my lips and my eyes stayed glued on the well sculpted bodies. I can feel my face flush red when I saw...when I saw the man's big...

Oh my Lord.

I quickly hid the magazines under my bed and took a deep breath. I can feel the discomfort in my pants that I had to literally strip off my clothes and take a cold shower.

I am not gay.

I am not sexually attracted to men.

I will not sin.

I am not sexually attracted to men.

Yes Keetan, keep telling yourself that. I need to pray. I need to ask for strength.

I knew my fascination of the male anatomy but since that will lead me to sinning, I try my best to avoid coming in contact with men with luscious bodies. This was a test for me. This was also the very reason why I don't have the same hate that my people have towards gays. Was I a hypocrite? No...I don't think so. I don't indulge myself in the internet to see naked pictures of men. I bit my bottom lip and grabbed the stack of magazine to throw it. I turned my heels to the bathroom and my hands shook at the act of throwing away the magazines.

I must do this...

I shove the magazines in the trash bin and washed my hands.

What an eventful day... I was lucky that I resisted the urge to keep the magazines.

I jumped to my bed and forced myself to forget about the naked pictures. Being gay and being attracted to a male's body were different right? I can't possibly be gay.

"You and I both know that you like dicks."

I gasped from the sound of that familiar voice. I looked around me to see if there was anyone here but I was alone. I pulled the covers over me. The Lord must be testing my faith. I must not betray Him.

"I will not betray Him. I will never disappoint him," I whispered to myself. Someone was definitely with me. This was not the first time I was visited by spirits but I was still afraid nonetheless. I felt a warm air being blown to my ear.

This was a strong spirit if it could make me feel something physically. I hope it does not hurt me. So far, the spirits that have visited me haven't done anything violent but if I can recall, what happened to me at school might be the doing of those evil spirits. My heart pounded rapidly in my chest. The temperature in my room was getting colder and colder.

"I am a servant of the Lord...I will never disappoint him," I whispered to myself. "I will not replace him with anything or anyone else..."

"But you already did..."